A/N I don't own HP. :( The idea for this fic came from Sweet Siren's Song's 10 Ways to Annoy: Tortall Style. This is not Betaed, so and feedback is welcome.

For Sweet Siren's Song.

1. Ask him if he needs a flea collar.

2. Ask him why his Animagus form is a mutt when the Black family is pure blooded.

3. Repeatedly ask him if he is SURE that he isn't in a relationship with Remus.

4. Ask him if the reason that he had Peter be Secret Keeper for the Potters was that he was a coward and didn't want anyone to know that the Hat had almost put him in Hufflepuff.

5. Tell him that a dog Animagus isn't very fitting, at the rate he goes through women, he should have a rabbit Animagus.

6. Look at Sirius and comment on how you are sorry that Regulus died, as he was the better looking brother.

7. Tell him that you can see the family resemblance between him and Bellatrix.

8. Talk about how great Tonks's Metamorphagus talents are in bed in a loud voice.

9. Scream "murderer!" or "Death Eater!" when he walks into a room and run to hide behind Severus Snape.

10. Tell him that his family must be so proud of who he has become.

I do believe that Draco Malfoy is up next, though I reserve the right to change my mind at a nanosecond's notice. It could be Harry. Or Hermione. Or Lord Voldemort.