A/N: Hey guys! I again apologise for my next to immediate close to my previous fanfic. I am starting a new one, as you can see. This is NOT a serious fic (It may seem like it at times, this is my first jab at ANYTHING humorous), but it will be a fairly godlike Naruto. I repeat, this is purely intended as HUMOR. I hope that my grammar is better. as you know if you read my first fic, I have fairly poor grammar and use run-on sentences far too often. And also, a special shoutout to fco ala, The only person who gave me a suggestion at the time of writing this. However, I am sorry fco ala, I am not using your idea, I didn't really understand what you meant. If you clarify, I MIGHT use it as another story. I dont even know if i'll write another story! If i get good positive feedback, I'll continue this. And when I say positive feedback, I mean even if only two people review my story and honestly stay with it, I will try to continue. I'm gonna try some cliffhangers as well. Sorry if this A/N is disorganized, I just add on when I think of something else. Oh yeah, The characters may seem unrealistically mature, even considering the fact that they were forced to mature at a young age, due to their chosen line of work. Don't worry though, I won't have any college level 2 year olds. It agitates me when that happens.

Summary: Our favorite blonde never seems to have a very religious life, now does he? But what would happen if religion gave him a good knock in the head? Now as a follower of the log, will naruto manage to follow his new dream as well as his old one?

I don't own Naruto

Chapter One

A six year old boy lay in the corner of a dark alley, beaten, bloody, and bruised. Now you might ask yourself, how could there be any reason for this poor boy's condition. The answer is quite simple; the villagers are dense and stupid. This boy is the village's resident Jinchuuriki, Naruto Uzumaki.

"why do they hurt me?" Naruto cried out as he lay in a pool of his own blood, although the wounds were already healing "I've never done anything to them." almost as soon as the words came out of his mouth, an object hit him square in the back of the head. 'stupid villager' he thought as he turned around. he looked around to see who hit him, only to see whoever it was was already gone. 'might as well see what they threw' he deliberated while looking around. As he trailed his eyes along the ground, he noticed a book. 'is that what they threw?' he mused 'the people at the orphanage always said that I couldn't have books, and that demons shouldn't learn to read. From the few words that Naruto knew, he made out "The Holly Bok of Loog?" naruto pondered as he picked said book up. "huh, it must be a Christmas book!. Maybe I should go talk to jiji about this." Naruto walked to the hokage tower, all the while trying to avoid the cold glares sent his way. As he finally reached the tower, the secretary stood in front of the door as naruto tried to walk in,

"What are you doing here demon?" the secretary asked with no small amount of venom.

"I need to talk to jiji, now let me through!"

"I'd rather see you dead, brat. In fact, why don't I see to it that you are." she said with a wicked grin as she reached under her desk for a hidden kunai.

The hokage stormed from his office. "What's going on here?!" he bellowed. once he looked at the two bothering his 'reading' time, blushing at the thought of his students small orange book, he could quite easily see what was wrong. "You're fired!" he screamed at his secretary, spit flying from his mouth. She tried to stutter something out, but the god of shinobi simply continued "Expect to have a conversation with ibiki. Now Naruto, what's wrong?" Finally noticing the boy's bloody attire, the hokage grew furious once again. This time however, he tried to conceal it, if only for the boy's sake.

"Jiji, I found this awesome book, can you teach me how to read it?" Naruto asked his grandfather figure.

"What do you mean Naruto? didn't the people at the orphanage teach you to read?" although Hiruzen already had a guess what happened.

"What do you mean? Were they supposed to? They always said Demons shouldn't read."

Hiruzen felt his anger begin to overflow "Yes Naruto, they were supposed to. Now what happened to your clothes?"

"Oh, it was the villagers again, they attacked me." Naruto saw his jiji begin to get angry. confusing it with anger at him, he tried to apologise "I'm sorry jiji! I didn't do anything, I swear!"

Sensing his almost-grandson's troubles, he said to him "Don't worry Naruto, I'm not mad at you, you didn't do anything wrong. Now then, let's go get you cleaned up."

The two walked through the hokage tower heading towards the living quarters and more specifically the bathroom. "Now than Naruto, while I get you washed up, can you tell me what the book is called?" The old man spoke, trying to distract Naruto as he began undressing him to wash him.

"Sure jiji! I think it's a christmas book, because it says 'holly' on it, but i don't know for sure. It's called 'the holly bok of loog'!, sounds cool, doesn't it?"

"Can I see that book Naruto?"

"Of course! It's in my pocket!"

"Which one, left or right?"

"What's a 'left or right'?"

"Never mind naruto, I'll find it" The old Sarutobi stated, one again with barely contained fury 'Today doesn't seem good for my blood pressure' He thought as he reached into the boys track suit and found the item of his attention. he pulled out a weathered book, wondering about the age. As he looked at the cover, he grew surprised. "Naruto! this isn't the 'Holly Bok of Loog'! this is an ancient copy of the 'holy book of log'! It's a religious text."

"Can you still help me read it?" Naruto asked, with a hint of depression in his voice.

"sure Naruto, I'll teach you how to read. Do you still want to be a ninja Naruto?"

"Yeah!"

"well than, I'll enroll you in the academy for next year. You'll definitely need to learn to read if you want to attend."

"Yay! thank you jiji!" Naruto shouted while splashing around in the tub.

"It's no problem Naruto, shall we start your lessons now?"

"Yeah!"

Time Skip - 12 months

"Ok Naruto, this is your first day at the academy. Before you go, I have a gift for you for completing your reading assignment" the aged hokage said, holding his hands behind his back

"REALLY?! what is it?! what is it?!" Naruto yelled as bounced around the poor old man

"Relax Naruto, think about it, what was the whole reason you wanted to learn to read in the first place? I said you could have it after you finished your lessons?"

"The Holly Bok of Loog?" Naruto questioned as hiruzen groaned

"Read the name again Naruto"

"The Holy Book of Log? But what happened to the holly bok of loog?" At first, the boy's substitute grandfather looked proud, but at the last part, He face faulted.

"there is no 'holly bok of loog' Naruto, you just misread it at first. Anyways Naruto, you should get to your class, it's room 301. Remember, your teacher's name is Iruka."

And with those simple words, Naruto began the short trek to the building, and the long journey towards his dream.

A/N: And that's the prologue, more like ch. 1, but it was mostly introductory material anyway. I realize that there is a lot of mistakes, and if it bothers you, send me a pm with the section it's in and the error itself, and I'll fix it up for you. Once again, I'm so sorry for the last story if you read it, but I lost my way completely, and didn't even have a small idea where I was going with the last one. I believe that it is extremely rude to not finish a story, however, I also realize there are exceptions. for instance, I would have continued to write even if I had lost all motivation, but as I had backed myself into a corner, I could not continue. I WILL finish this story, nothing short of amnesia will stop me. If i stop writing for a more than 2 months, send me a pm, it may have slipped my mind. no pun(?) intended. I will begin work on the second chapter immediately. I have no definite pairing, so send me a comment with who and why! Tell me if I pace things way to fast though will ya? Send me comments, they keep me going!