Love is a many confusing thing

A Rugrats: All Grown Up Fanfiction by Resotii
Note: This story is completely from Kimi's POV

Why am I feeling this way? Ever since that incident with the initials TP+KF etched into the wall and Chuckie going nuts about the possibility of me and Tommy being into each other, I'm beginning to contemplate my relationship with Tommy. I already made it clear that I didn't have any romantic feelings for him but in the back of my mind I'm beginning to believe I'm starting to fall for him. But what can I do? He's with Rachel. He's off the market. And besides, if we were a couple I wouldn't want things to become awkward if we had a bad breakup.

"Um, excuse me? Are you listening?" A voice suddenly brings me back to reality as I realize I was wiping down the same spot on the front counter at the Java Lava for the past fifteen minutes.

I perk up instantly. "Oh! Uh-um, sorry about that!"

"I said I'd like a strawberry banana smoothie, please." It was a customer and he seemed slightly irritated by the fact that I wasn't listening to his request.

"I'll get right on that, sir." I try to manage a smile, and then quickly got to work on the smoothie.

Chuckie has been missing work quite a bit lately. He told Dad that he had some really important school related work to do but I was starting to get suspicious.

"Here you are."

The kid dropped some money onto the counter and took the smoothie without saying a word. I think I heard him mumble something under his breath in an angry scowl as he walked away. I guess I deserve that since I wasn't paying attention to him when I should have been but I'm so preoccupied with this thought that I might be falling for Tommy that I don't really care. That sounds rude but it's the truth.

Thankfully it was almost eight-o-clock which meant it was nearly closing time. Suddenly I hear my dad say my name from the back room.

"Yeah, dad?" I reply, scrubbing some strawberry-banana smoothie from the counter.

"If there aren't any customers, feel free to start closing up!"

I glance around the Java Lava and surely enough there aren't any customers. Oh, what a relief. I was so ready to go home.

Later that night, I was walking through the hall to go brush my teeth before heading to bed when I heard the most surprising statement.

It was muffled but I know for sure that I heard Chuckie say, "I love you too, Lil. Bye." from his room. Wait, were Chuckie and Lil secretly dating? No wonder, Chuckie was taking so much time off work! He was spending time with Lil. Come to think of it, Lil has been avoiding me at school too but I never thought much about it. It all made sense now!

I had half the mind to burst through Chuckie's door or knock vigorously if the door was locked and confront him about keeping the fact that he and Lil were a couple a secret but then something occurred to me. If Chuckie was going to be sneaky about his relationship with Lil then I should start secretly dating Tommy to get back at him! But there was one small problem… Tommy's with Rachel. I guess I had no other choice but to let this discovery go unnoticed.

The next day at school, I was sitting at a table outside during lunch, doodling in a notebook when this random girl came up to me and said, "Did you hear?"

I look toward her with a skeptical expression and reply with, "What?"

"Tommy and Rachel broke up!" She squealed excitedly. "That means Tommy is available! He's sooooo cute!"

"Yeah. Cool." I wanted to mention how much Tommy might be hurting right now to this weird girl but all she seems to care about is Tommy's looks so instead I just nod slowly.

She leaves smiling from ear to ear and rushes off to what seems to be the "Tommy Fan Club". It's a slew of other girls and they all start giggling uncontrollable as soon as she went over there.

Who knew so many girls liked Tommy. I'm not surprised. The way he smiles when he's being reassuring toward his friends, his short spiky hair, and his genuine voice… I mentally slap myself. Kimi, stop, he's your friend! You should just... wait a minute. That girl said Tommy and Rachel weren't dating anymore. That meant Tommy was single again. But more importantly, he was probably in a lot of pain right now from the breakup. I had to find him so I could console him about it.

After school, I search all the places he would be when finally I see him out in the field, kicking around a soccer ball.

"Tommy!" I shout his name to get his attention.

He stops instantly and looks in my direction. I feel my heart beat quicken. Wait, why am I feeling this way? It's Tommy. He's a friend. A good friend and that's all.

"Hey, Kimi, what's up?" He asks, that signature smile spreading across his face.

"Oh, um… nothing much, I just heard about you and Rachel and wanted to see if you were alright." I tell him, looking away.

"Oh, that." Tommy replied, kicking the soccer ball between his feet. "Actually, I'm the one who broke up with her."

Did I hear right? Did he just say that he broke up with her?

"You did?" I had to ask.

Tommy stops kicking the soccer ball back and forth and lifts it up into his hands. "Yeah, it's just… I realized that I…" He pauses for a second looking intently at the soccer ball in his hands. "…I think I'm falling in love with someone else, s-someone who seemed to be there all along."

I do my best to hold back a gasp. Who could he be talking about? But for some reason I can't think of anything to say to him.

Tommy doesn't look at me and there's an awkward silence between us. But then he finally speaks up. "I…I gotta go." He says somewhat under his breath and rushes off.

And I could have sworn that he was blushing.

That night I was sitting on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I've been doing this for quite a while. I just couldn't figure out why Tommy was acting so weird. Okay, yeah. I had my ideas. But I just didn't seem to want to believe that he was acting that way because I was the one he was falling for. But wasn't it obvious? He said it was someone who'd been there all along and he wouldn't even look at me when he said all this and he was quick to get the heck out of there. But then again, it could be possible that he was embarrassed about these feelings and didn't want to share them with me. Ugh, I don't know what to think!

Suddenly I hear my mom calling from downstairs. "Kimi, Dil is here for you!"

"Dil?" I question to myself out loud.

A perplexed expression on my face I head downstairs and surely enough Dil is standing just inside the front door. It looked like he had something in his hands.

"Did, what are you doing here?" I say as I come up to him.

"Tommy wanted me to give this to you." He said in a whisper. "Is Chuckie around? Tommy wanted to make sure you got this without Chuckie knowing."

"No. He went out somewhere." I reply but I was highly certain I knew where Chuckie was at this moment.

"Good." Dil sighed, talking normally. "Well, here. Tommy said it was mega important. Well, see ya." And with that he left with the wave his hand.

For a second, I just stand there holding the envelope in my hands, watching Dil leave. What was this letter that Tommy wanted me to read? What was so important about it? But then it clicked. I ran up to my room, shutting my door so I could read this letter in private. What was in store for me?

I lock the door just to be safe so no one will burst through my door and interrupt me as I'm reading Tommy's letter. I know my parents aren't the type to do that, they'd knock. But I wasn't so sure about Chuckie but I didn't have to worry about him because I know for sure that he was hanging out at Lil's house.

I overheard him telling Dad that he was going to the library for some late night research but I know for certain that he was so not going to do that and I was a little surprised at him for lying straight to Dad's face like that. I'll cut him some slack because even though he's keeping the fact that he and Lil are an item a secret, I thought it was totally cute that they were together.

Anyway, it was time to read this letter; I get comfortable on my bed and carefully take the letter out of the cute baby blue envelope that it was in. I could tell that Tommy put in a lot of effort putting this thing together. I imagine Tommy's voice playing in my head as I begin to read it:

Dear Kimi,

I'm super sorry for the way I acted yesterday but I just wanted to tell you that you are the one I'm starting to fall in love with. Ever since that whole fiasco with the initials and you admitting that you were the one who carved them, I realized that I have strong feelings for you. When you said you liked me "a billion years ago for second" a dagger kind of shot through my heart. I just want to know if that's true. Do you not feel the same way? And if you don't I completely understand. I wouldn't want things to become awkward between us if things didn't go well. But is it okay if we meet at the Java Lava at 4pm tomorrow? I'd like to talk this out in person.

-Tommy

I read over the letter a couple times to make sure I was reading right. Tommy did have feelings for me. And not only that, he also understood why I was reluctant to tell him how I feel about him. I feel my heart beat quicken and my face heating up. What do I do? He wants to meet with me! I can't bail out on him that would be a horrible thing to do. And Tommy must have made sure I wouldn't be working because tomorrow is Saturday, and Dad lets me have the day off on Saturdays. Saturdays is when Chuckie has to work. It's only fair since he gets to have Mondays off.

I look over the letter one last time admiring his cute handwriting then flop on to my bed with a sign. I place the letter back into the envelope and tuck it under my pillow. Closing my eyes, I sigh again. I just lay there for a bit trying to think things over when something occurs to me.

This was the perfect opportunity to get back at Chuckie for keep his relationship with Lil a secret! Me and Tommy could start dating just to tick Chuckie off! But wait, that would make it seem like I was using Tommy to make Chuckie angry. But I did like Tommy. A lot. And I really wanted to be his girlfriend. I have wanted to be his girlfriend ever since that carving incident. And apparently it was the same case for him. Oh, Tommy why did you have to be so irresistibly cute?

I decided that I would meet up with Tommy at the Java Lava. It's nearly 4pm as I enter the beverage joint. I looked around and spot Tommy sitting at a table near the video game machines, drinking a smoothie. I also notice that Chuckie is surprisingly working the counter. I thought for sure he would want to have the day off to "study at the library" a.k.a spend time with Lil.

He's staring down at something and has a look of concentration on his face. He was obviously texting Lil. Well, shame on him for texting when he was supposed to be working, but it wasn't exactly a busy day today.

I walk over to Tommy and pull out the empty chair at Tommy's table and sit down.

"You wanted to meet with me…?" I question, batting my eyelashes flirtingly just for the heck of it.

This action makes Tommy's entire face turn red as he stutters, "Y-yeah, I did." He glances at the counter at Chuckie to make sure he's not paying any attention to them. Luckily, Chuckie is totally engrossed with his phone.

"Tommy…?" I begin.

"Yeah?"

"I just want you to know that I wasn't being entirely truthful that night. The truth is… despite saying that I liked you a billion years ago for a second I was totally lying... I've always had feelings for you." It felt great to finally come clean with him.

Tommy didn't say anything back, but instead he breathed a sigh of deep relief and smiled at me. Could a smile be anymore adorable?

There's a short silence of us just looking at each other with sincere smiles. Tommy, noticing that it's starting to get a little awkward looks away, and starts fiddling with the straw of his smoothie cup.

After a moment he speaks up saying, "I can't tell you how happy this makes me." He's still not looking at me but I can tell he means every word. "You know, to be honest… I don't think I was truly in love with Rachel."

"What do you mean?" I questioned, what was he saying?

Making eye contact with me, he continued. "I mean, yes, I did like her but it wasn't exactly real love. I guess I wanted to believe that it was real because I didn't think I could ever be with you."

I didn't know what to say to that. The way he was staring at me, the seriousness in his eyes, I knew he was being completely honest with me. I had to say something back. Anything.

"Tommy…" All I manage to say is his name.

"Look, I know that Chuckie totally freaked out when he thought we were dating…" He looks over at Chuckie when he says this then back at me. "But if he were truly my best friend he'd be happy for us. He can trust me. I would never do anything to hurt you. Never."

Wow, I don't think I've ever seen Tommy so serious before and it was very flattering that it was all for me. I had to tell him what was going on with Chuckie and Lil. He had a right to know.

"Speaking of which…" I start, why is this so hard to talk about?

"Hmm?" Tommy questioned, an adorable look of confusion appearing on his face.

But I had to focus. Taking a deep breath, I mentally figure out how to word what I wanted to say out loud and went for it. "Chuckie and Lil are secretly dating." Okay, wow, I really didn't mean to be that blunt about it.

Suddenly, Tommy's expression of confusion turned to anger. "Seriously? He goes off on me for the possibility of you and me dating but then he has the nerve to start dating Lil and being all secretive about it?"

"Y-yeah." Is all I can say. Man, I'm so pathetic.

There's a brief moment of Tommy glaring at Chuckie, as he scrubbed at the counter. Then something seemed to occur to Tommy because he calmed down a little and his angry expression was brought back to confusion.

"Wait, how can you be sure they are dating?"

I take a second to collect myself after that little outburst Tommy had just did and reply. "Well, I was walking past his room to go brush my teeth and over heard him saying bye to Lil over the phone and he also said 'I love you, too'."

"Well, that settles it." Tommy said pounding his fists lightly on the table.

"Settles what?" I was really confused.

"Heck, if Chuckie's going to secretly date Lil than it's obvious that we have every right to be together." Again Tommy had that look in his eyes that showed he was completely serious.

"I'm not following…"

"We're going to start dating… and it's not going to be a secret either. We're going to do it to get back Chuckie for deceiving us. " And with that statement, he actually smirked.

And I have to say, it made him irresistible. But I still needed to ask…

"Isn't that like…using each other?"

Tommy had to take a moment to think about it. Then he spoke up. "Not entirely. I mean, it's not like we're pretending to be in love, right?" He then gave me another one of his super adorable smiles and I swear I thought I was going to melt.

But in all seriousness, what Tommy said was a good point so naturally I said, "Yeah, that's true."

"Follow my lead." He told me holding out his hand and winking at me. I think I might die, he's just too cute for this planet!

I take his hand and he pulls me to his side and we slowly head out to leave the Java Lava. But slowly enough so that Chuckie could notice that we were holding hands.

"Is he looking?" Tommy whispers, squeezing my hand slightly.

I glance over as we walk out the doors, trying my best not to look obvious. It wasn't very easy but I managed to notice Chuckie looking at us, mostly Tommy, with a strange look on his face. I couldn't tell if it was shock or anger. But I know he wasn't happy about it. For some reason, and this may make me a horrible person, I didn't care. Tommy was holding my hand!

"Did he see us?" Tommy asked when we were out of the Java Lava.

"Yeah, and he didn't seem all too thrilled by the fact that we were holding hands." I tell him.

"Good. That'll teach him. But we're just getting started." Tommy said with a smirk.

Wow. I don't think I've ever seen Tommy act so devious. It was incredibly attractive.

But I had to ask. "What did you have in mind?"

"Well, you know how gossip travels fast at our school. I figure if we are super public about our relationship around school, people will notice and of course they're going to talk about." Tommy's expression was to die for; it was a little hard to focus on what he was saying. "And Chuckie's going to find out about us from people at school which I'm sure will make him even more furious."

"That makes sense." I reply with a smile.

There's a brief silence between us and then Tommy brings me into an embrace. I can feel my face heat up and my heartbeat quicken.

"I'm sorry I never told you how I felt about you sooner."

"I-It's fine." Did I seriously just stutter? Talk about pathetic.

He then holds me away from at arm's length and continues, "And I promise once this Chuckie fiasco is over, we'll start dating for real."

"O-okay." There I go again, stuttering. What's wrong with me?

After all was said, Tommy walked me home. (What a gentlemen!) Once we were on my front porch, he hugged me again. Just then, I heard the front door open. We both turn toward the door to find out that it was Chuckie. He break apart instantly.

"Chuckie!" W-What are you doing here?" I questioned.

"Dad decided to close early but that's beside the point!" Chuckie was super angry. "I saw you guys earlier! What exactly are you trying to pull?!"

"You're one to talk!" Tommy shot back, walking up to Chuckie.

"Me?!" Chuckie exclaimed, pointing to himself.

"Don't even go there, Chuckie!" Tommy exclaimed back. "Kimi told me all about how you and Lil are secretly dating."

"But…" A look of confusion spread across Chuckie's face. "…How did she know?"

I opened my mouth to explain but Tommy was one step ahead.

"She overheard you talking to Lil on the phone and saying you love her."

There a brief silence then Chuckie let out a deep sigh, saying, "I meant to tell you guys… it's just… I was afraid."

"Why would you be scared?" I finally had the chance to say something.

"Well, you remember how agro I got when I thought that you guys were dating. I was afraid that I'd come across as a hypocrite for starting to date Lil. You know, because we're all close friends and all. I mean Phil doesn't even know yet."

"But I plan to tell him." A voice suddenly said from behind me and Tommy.

We all looked toward the source of the voice to find that it was Lil.

"Lil?" I questioned. "Why are you here?"

"Chuckie told me about the hand-holding incident and I told him it was time that we fessed up. I told him that I'd be right over and we planned to tell you everything when you came home. But it seems like Chuckie beat me to the punch."

Tommy turned his attention back to Chuckie. "Is that true, Chuckie?"

Chuckie sighed again and said, "Yeah."

"Look, Chuckie, you shouldn't be afraid. I'm perfectly okay with you and Lil dating." I confess. "I admit, I was a bit shocked at first when I found out but I quickly got over it because I realized you two are a super cute couple!"

"Heh, you've got a good point, Kimi." Tommy told me with a laugh. Oooh, his laugh was so infectious.

Chuckie and Lil blushed with embarrassment.

"I got to say though, Chuckie…" Tommy said, causing the atmosphere to get a bit serious. "We should just forget about this best friend code. I mean, we've known each other since we were babies. Don't you think I'd be the best qualified to date Kimi? You should know that I would never do anything to hurt her." And with that last part, he put his arm around me, causing me to blush.

"You're right, Tommy. I guess I was acting a bit silly back then." Chuckie replied. "I'm sorry."

"No problem, Chuck." Tommy said with a smile and the two of them share a fist bump.

Lil walks over to Chuckie's side and grabs hold of his hand, and glancing over at him, she says, "I'm glad everything is out in the open between us now."

A brilliant idea forms in my head and I exclaim. "We should totally go on a double date!"

Everyone starts to laugh, which makes me feel a bit disheartened but I added, "I was being serious…"

The End

Decided to compile this story into one big chapter since the chapters were so short, and I also made some small changes.