~With sincere apologies to Yamane-sensei (who owns the rights to the Finder series)... and also to Takaba-kun.

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. . . . .

Acting on a tip, sexy photojournalist Asami Ryuichi takes a series of photographs of a corrupt politician taking a bribe from a night club manager. Asami doesn't care much for politicians and he particularly detests the corrupt kind.

. . . . .

A few days later Kirishima Kei, Administrative Assistant extraordinaire, hands a file containing photos to businessman and Crime Lordling, 23-year-old Takaba Akihito. "Sir, the manager of Club Sion was caught bribing a government official in front of the club and a photojournalist managed to get pictures of the transaction. Now we have cops sniffing all around the place."

"Wait... that dude did this at MY club? In FRONT of my club?!" Takaba rolls his eyes. "What an idiot. Honestly, I'm surrounded by nothing but idiots! What bonehead hired that manager?"

Kirishima hesitates momentarily, "You did, sir."

Takaba looks at Kirishima, surprised. "I did? Are you sure?"

Kirishima nods. "You said you wanted to take care of all the hiring yourself. I think you're overdoing it, sir. I wish you'd let me take on more duties."

Takaba considers this for a moment, "True... you were hired to be my Administrative Ass... thingy." Kirishima winces.

Takaba brightens, "Okay, then please take care of this business for me. You and Suoh go cut off some part of the body that the manager values. Like maybe... HIS HEAD!"

Kirishima enthusiastically turns to fellow lackey, Suoh Kazumi. "You heard what he said! Let's get to work."

Suoh frowns, "Can't we just shoot him? I hate getting my hands dirty."

Takaba is engrossed in looking at the photos in the file and is not paying attention. He waves them away, "Whatever."

Suoh takes out a gun and loads a clip into it. He and Kirishima exit the office. Takaba pulls a large photo out the file of Asami Ryuichi, age 35, looking damn sexy! He studies it and grins. "I bet you think you're a bad-ass for targeting my stuff, don't you? I'm gonna have to take you down a notch."

. . . . .

A few nights later in an alleyway, Kirishima and Suoh have caught and restrained photographer Asami Ryuichi . "If this is about those photos, they never made it to publication. You're wasting your time... and mine... by coming after me."

Kirishima shrugs, "It's nothing personal. We get paid to follow orders."

"And the Boss ordered us to kick your ass," Suoh adds.

Asami thinks for a second. "I see. So, I could conceivably offer you money and you'd go kick his ass for me?"

"How much...?" both Kirishima and Suoh both reply at the same time.

Takaba steps out of the shadows and glares at his lackeys. "Idiots... " he mutters.

Takaba turns to Asami and smiles, "Well, well, well! Asami Ryuichi ... we meet at last." He carefully studies Asami, who is dressed elegantly in a suit and tie. "Aren't you a little overdressed for a photojournalist?"

"I dress for success." Asami smirks as he checks out Takaba's clothing, which consists of an old military jacket, t-shirt, jeans with holes in them and a worn-out pair of Nikes. "I'm going guess you're an utter failure."

Takaba rolls his eyes, "Hahaha... so witty." He eyes Asami, suspiciously. "So, I was just wondering... who let you in on that little transaction between my club manager and that crooked politician?"

"Nobody," Asami says matter-of-factly. "I just happened to be passing by. What idiot arranges for a bribe to be taken out in the open?"

Takaba growls, "I'll ask you one more time... WHO tipped you off?!"

Asami gives Takaba an amused look, "Your mother."

Takaba turns red and nods to Kirishima who knees Asami HARD in the stomach. Asami bends over and lets out his breath, then stands back up and pats his stomach.

"Not bad... " Asami suddenly twists around and kicks Kirishima's knee. Kirishima goes down and Asami breaks away from Suoh. He runs toward a door at the end of the alley and escapes through it.

"Well?!" Takaba looks at his men, expectantly, "What are you waiting for? Go after him!"

Kirishima is sitting on the ground, painfully rubbing his knee. "I don't want to do that." Takaba turns to Suoh, who just shrugs.

"I'll give you a 2% raise," Takaba offers to Suoh.

"5%," Suoh counters.

Kirishima struggles to stand. "No... he'll do it for 10%."

Suoh offers Kirishima a hand and pulls him up. "Yeah! And 10% for him, too," Suoh crooks his thumb at Kirishima. "Or we don't budge."

Takaba glares at his two lackeys. "Fine! 10%... you crooks! Now GO GET HIM!" Both Kirishima and Suoh run after Asami.

Meanwhile, Asami discovers the doorway he went through only led to the roof. Now he's cornered like a rat on the roof.

"HA! Now you're cornered like a rat on the roof!" Suoh gloats.

Asami gives the men a calculating look. "How much money are we talking for you to let me walk?"

Kirishima shakes his head. "We know who your boss is. He doesn't pay you that much."

Asami glances over the edge of the building. "I suppose there's no helping it then..." He suddenly hurdles over the rail.

Shocked, Takaba and his lackeys run to the rail and peer over the edge. Asami is quickly climbing down a fire escape.

"Wow... a fire escape," Kirishima exclaims. "I didn't know that was there!"

Having reached the ground, Asami turns back around and winks at Takaba before vanishing into the shadows. Takaba is livid.

"This isn't over yet... Asami!"

. . . . .

The next morning, Asami is at the police station speaking to Detective Yamazaki in the detective's office. Yamazaki is backing away from Asami as Asami bears down on him. "It's very strange how first you give me a tip that not only turns out to be entirely useless, but then causes some punk kid and his goons to come after me in retaliation for it. Don't you think that's very strange... Yamazaki?"

"N-n-now Asami..." Yamazaki is now backed into a corner and cannot retreat further.

"Not to mention, some grime got on my suit from climbing down the fire escape, " Asami glares at him. "I'll be sending you the dry cleaning bill."

Yamazaki nods energetically, "Y-yes, of course."

"Well? You better have a VERY good explanation for all of this!"

Yamazaki sighs and then indicates that Asami should take a seat. "That 'punk kid and his goons' sounds like someone named 'Takaba'. He's a real bad apple... he's the leader of a large organization that specializes in smuggling guns and illegal drugs throughout all of Asia. You want to avoid him at all costs... he's considered VERY dangerous."

"You're joking... that KID an organized crime boss? Dangerous?! I seriously doubt it!"

"Well... it's actually his father who is the big, scary leader. Takaba acquired his present position by using 'daddy's influence'."

"That's sounds more believable." Asami grins devilishly, "Actually, he's kind of cute. I'd love to have the chance to bully him."

Yamazaki raises his eyebrows. "You know, Asami... sometimes you really scare me. Seriously though, don't go after him or else you might end up provoking 'daddy' and his gang instead." Yamazaki becomes lost in thought and mumbles to himself, "... and they might take you out..."

"What did you say?"

"Oh... nothing. By the way, I have another tip for you."

Asami cocks an eyebrow. "Does it have to do with Takaba again?"

Yamazaki laughs nervously. "Nooo... not at all!"

"What a pity. What do you have?"

"Some government officials- MARRIED government officials- are hosting a secret party tonight. I expect it will include all the usual unlawful and immoral things- drugs, prostitutes, and uhh... a couple of sheep. Interested?"

"How many of them are high-profile?" Asami asks.

"Sources tell me at least two."

"Sheep, eh? That's not very original. Still, there's a good chance someone will pay for those pictures. I'll take it."

Yamazaki breathes a sigh of relief and scribbles on a piece of paper. He hands it to Asami. "It will at a warehouse down at the pier, at midnight. Here's the address."

. . . . .

Later that evening at Takaba's penthouse, a freshly-showered Takaba sits cross-legged on the sofa, dressed in striped shorts and a t-shirt with "Everybody Loves an Asian Boy" printed across the front of it. He is thinking about Asami and his spectacular escape from his henchmen's clutches... the witty way Asami insulted him... his rather athletic descent down the fire escape... the way he winked at him before disappearing into the night. "NOBODY makes a fool out of me. Especially you, Asami! You'll see... "

. . . . .

At exactly midnight, sexy photojournalist Asami Ryuichi prepares to take some incriminating photos of corrupt politicians. He focuses his telephoto lens on a lone figure standing on the wharf and through his viewfinder he sees Takaba gazing back at him, looking rather smug.

"I see... so it IS Takaba after all. This is going to be fun... " This is the last thought that goes through Asami's mind before Suoh grabs him from behind and knocks him out.

Suoh places Asami into Takaba's limo. Takaba stares at the unconscious Asami with a sense of foreboding. "Why does he have a smile on his face?"

Suoh is also staring at Asami. "I know. Spooky, isn't it?"

. . . . .

When Asami comes to, he discovers he has been restrained by a rope with a series of weird knots tied haphazardly here and there. He sees Takaba standing over him, smirking. Beside Takaba is a large black leather case.

"I see you're finally awake Asami. Prepared to be TORTURED and HUMILIATED!"

"And how do you propose to do that?" Asami asks.

Takaba picks up the bag and shakes it. "I have in this bag, all kinds of interesting devices. Sexual ones! The mere SIGHT of them will strike terror in your heart!"

Asami eyes glitter with amusement. " 'Sexual ones'? Shouldn't you have undressed me before tying me up?"

Takaba smacks his forehead with his hand. "OH! I forgot to undress you! Well... I DID take take off your coat and tie."

Asami shakes his head. "You really don't have a clue what you're doing, do you?"

Takaba smirks, "What makes you say that... O prisoner of mine?"

"To begin with, you don't know how to properly tie a knot." Asami stands up and the rope falls off of him. "Here, let me show you... "

A minute later, Takaba is spread-eagle and naked on a table, expertly bound with the rope using a series of very intricate-looking knots. Takaba is shaking with rage. "This is NOT supposed to happen this way! C'mon... let me go!"

Asami ignores Takaba's demands and opens the black bag. "What do you have in here?" He holds up a large black vibrator and grins. "You're such a naughty boy!"

Takaba blushes. "That's not mine."

Asami rummages through the bag, "Hmm... there's A LOT of different vibrators in here. Let's see... cock ring, string of beads, nipple clamps... " He pulls out a clear hose, "Is this a urinary catheter? How shocking. Do your subordinates know you're into this kind of thing?"

"I'm not into ANYTHING AT ALL! None of it has ever been used! I got that stuff to torture and humiliate YOU!"

"Never been used, eh? It would be a shame not try it all out first... just to make sure everything works."

Five minutes later, the entire contents of the bag have been placed, inserted, buckled, clamped or glued (don't ask) onto Takaba. Asami stands back to admire his handiwork. "Aren't you a sight?" he sighs contentedly.

He picks up his camera and begins shooting pictures. "This one is going to be the background for my computer," He moves to a different angle, "and this one I think should be the screensaver for my phone." He aims the camera between Takaba's legs in a way that will also includes Takaba's face. "THIS ONE I'm going to make into a poster... to hang above my bed..."

. . . . .

Three days later, Asami returns to the pier to retrieve the rest of his camera equipment and spots Yamazaki speaking with some rough-looking men.

They finish talking and the rough-looking men leave. Asami approaches Yamazaki. "Yamazaki, what are you doing here?"

"ASAMI!" Yamazaki is startled by Asami's sudden appearance. "I-I'm glad to see you're all right! You've been missing for three days. I was beginning to get worried."

"I bet you're even MORE worried now that you see I'm still alive. I know you set me up, Yamazaki."

Yamazaki pulls out a gun and aims it shakily at Asami. "I should have known Takaba couldn't handle you! I guess I'll have to take you out myself... "

Suddenly, Takaba appears from out of nowhere and jumps in front of Asami. He aims a gun at Yamazaki, holding it sideways. "So... YOU'RE to blame for my humiliation!" He fires the gun three times at Yamazaki.

All three shots miss.

Yamazaki impulsively glances down at his body to confirm he wasn't hit. Asami quickly snatches the gun from Takaba and fires it once at Yamazaki. Yamazaki drops his gun and falls to his knees, holding his hand in pain. Takaba stares at Asami in amazement.

Asami explains, "You missed because you were holding the gun, 'gangster-style'. It may look cool, but you end up sacrificing accuracy." He places the gun in Takaba's hands and then tries to adjust Takaba's grip on it properly. "You need to aim it with the barrel up so you can line up the rear sight with the front sight, aligning both the horizontal and vertical planes... "

Takaba angrily shakes Asami off, "I know how to shoot a gun!"

. . . . .

Takaba sits on a seawall gazing at the rising sun. Detective Yamazaki is sitting in the back of a police car. Asami finishes giving his statement to the police and walks toward Takaba.

"You were right. I'm an utter failure," Takaba says, dejectedly.

"You're not a failure. Because of you, the gang that was trying to take down your father's organization is no longer a threat." Asami sits down next to Takaba. "And besides... you're really cute, and having sex with you was incredibly..."

"GAAAH!" Takaba interrupts. "Don't say it! And don't call me 'cute' either. I'm not cute!"

"I also think you're dangerous. VERY dangerous."

Takaba looks up at Asami. "You really think so?"

"Oh, yes. And I'll keep watching you through my viewfinder, " Asami ruffles Takaba's hair affectionately, "until one day I can manage to outwit this VERY... cunning... villain."

Takaba glares at Asami. "You're patronizing me, aren't you?"

Asami smirks, "You're a lot smarter than you look."

. . . . .

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Next: Takaba pays Asami a visit