All eyes were on Peeta as soon as the sentence was out of his mouth. There was no hesitation before he continued.

"I heard you. When we first got here, before the voices stopped," he said, making no effort to keep the accusation out of his voice. "I wasn't sure it was you until you started talking. You think Katniss is arrogant and moody?" he spat. "You'd never even met her before today."

"I spoke to President Coin…"

"And that's enough to accurately judge a person?" Peeta interrupted. "You think because you're a head doctor that your opinion is valid before you've even met a person? Aren't you supposed to be more objective than that?"

"Peeta, relax," Katniss whispered, grabbing his arm. Now who was being hasty? She was no stranger to Peeta's mounting irritability over the last couple of weeks. And as Peeta's irritability grew, so did Katniss's wariness.

Though it developed in each of them differently, the negative effects of being stuck underground was never clearer. But in that moment, Katniss felt responsible for Peeta's outburst. She'd allowed her growing feelings of distrust consume her so wholly that Gale's accusations actually sounded rational. And she'd taken it out on Peeta. Now, with his anger already ignited, he was lashing out, and he wouldn't be going to the surface for another day - not that it'd help him for long.

"I like to be aware of who I'm dealing with before I meet them," Dr. Aurelius explained. "And now that I have, I think President Coin may have been wrong about who the moody one is."

"You listen about as well as you judge people," Katniss snapped, her own irritation rising.

"There's a reason for their behavior," Wiress blurted out, refusing to make eye contact with anyone. She seemed deep in thought as she spoke. "The environment down here is oppressive to those with their power. Being down here doesn't just affect their power, it affects their entire being. This is why I requested you be present during these meetings, Dr. Aurelius. I explained this to you."

Wiress was frustrated, speaking in a slow and even voice that made it sound like she was talking to a child instead of a trained medical professional. She reprimanded him for undermining her warning to him and then dismissed him from her compartment with a request to talk to Katniss and Peeta alone.

"I'm sorry. I was hoping he'd be more helpful than that," Wiress apologized. "He doesn't have to be present at these meetings anymore if you don't want him here."

"He had a point about the hobbies though," Peeta said.

"Even if he's not coming to our meetings, can he still help make it possible for me to visit with my sister?" Katniss added.

"I'll talk to him about it," Wiress said. "We'll meet here again tomorrow after Peeta comes back from the surface."

XXXX

The next week proved to be the closest thing to a settled routine that Katniss and Peeta had experienced since arriving in District 13. Their meetings with Wiress followed breakfast every morning unless it was Katniss or Peeta's day to go to the surface. On those days, Dr. Aurelius would sit in on their meetings, quietly observing the changes in their behavior, however small the changes were becoming, after being outside for just twenty minutes. He didn't say much. Outside of the occasional question, he sat quietly in the background taking notes.

Their meetings were slow, to say the least. Wiress looked through a notebook, nodding as she read to herself for the first twenty minutes, while Katniss and Peeta sat silently waiting for her to acknowledge them. And when she finally did engage them, she was disconnected and vague, hardly the helpful expert they'd been expecting to work with.

Luckily, the hours after lunch spent with Boggs and the other rebels had been progressing far better, and Katniss truly felt as though they'd made allies with the others in their squad. Even Gale was less confrontational after the dispute at the surface the week before. During one training session, he took time out to show the entire squad a prototype of a weapon he'd been working on with Beetee. It was a small box that fit in the palm of his hand. On the front was a blood red cross. And though Gale refused to explain exactly what it was, he assured them that despite its size, it would pack a punch.

Katniss and Peeta's hobbies were approved. But even with Dr. Aurelius's professional recommendation, it took a lot of back and forth in order for President Coin to finally agree to alter Katniss and Prim's daily itineraries to include time for the sisters to spend together. If it wasn't for Dr. Aurelius pointing out that Katniss had a slot of free time every week when Peeta was at the surface with Finnick, President Coin probably never would have conceded.

However, Peeta received his drawing tools almost immediately. And in the few free hours after dinner and before bed, he would sit, sketch, and color on the floor of the compartment, zoning out to a place where he was almost unreachable - almost content in a world where his frustrations were mounting daily.

He barely noticed Prim and Katniss enter the compartment the day of their scheduled quality time. That day, he sat cross legged on the beds, bent over a drawing that he was working on coloring in.

"See?" Katniss said to her sister. "Our compartment is no different than yours."

"It is, though!" Prim said, running to stare at the wall. "Mom and I don't have a television, or any drawings on the wall. Did you draw all of these, Peeta?"

Prim was right about that. The wall of Katniss and Peeta's compartment that used to be bare was now covered in Peeta's drawings, all taped to the wall around the television.

"What?" Peeta said, looking up at the sound of his name before realizing what Prim asked. "Oh, yeah. I did."

"I love them," Prim said. "They're all of the grove."

Prim smiled and ran her hand along a drawing of the lake. It was all there. From the two trees on the other side of the water, the reflection of their branches and leaves reflecting on the surface, right down to the acorns that littered the ground around the area. The clusters of greenery at the bank looked so life-like, Prim reached out to grab for it, laughing when she remembered she was only looking at a drawing.

"What are you working on now?" Prim asked, stepping up beside Peeta on the bed and taking a peek.

Katniss smiled and followed her sister, taking her own look at Peeta's drawing. Her breath caught in her throat when she saw it. Bright orange autumn leaves hung low on crooked branches. They looked like sets of hands lowering to cover anyone who sat under the large maple tree. The maple tree that had become Katniss and Peeta's place of solace in the grove. The lake in the distance shimmered in the sun, and the lush green grass sent a painful stab straight to Katniss's chest.

"That's your tree," Prim said softly. "You miss it, don't you?"

"Yes," Katniss and Peeta said in unison.

"So do I."

"Why?" Katniss asked. "You're doing so well here!"

"No I'm not," Prim laughed. "I eat, I sleep, and I go to school. That's it. And when school is finished, I'll eat, sleep and go to work. There's nothing here."

"There was nothing for you hidden in a grove, either," Katniss argued.

"At least she had a fighting chance in District 12," Peeta chimed in, setting his drawing down on the mattress. "Freedom to choose how to spend her days, hobbies that didn't have to be approved by a doctor, time to spend with her sister whenever she wanted."

"This place is cruel, Katniss," Prim said. "Even I can see that. The kids here? They've never been outside. Can you imagine that? Never knowing what fresh air felt like on your face? I hope we're not stuck here forever."

Katniss wanted to agree and promise her sister they wouldn't be. That one day they'd be safe back home in District 12 where they would never have to hide again, but she couldn't make a promise to her that she wasn't sure she could keep.

It was Peeta cutting in that saved Katniss from having to decide whether to lie to her sister or tell her the truth. Both were awful choices.

"Do you want to take a drawing back to your compartment with you, Prim? Peeta asked, ruffling through drawings he hadn't hung up. "How about this one?" he held up a page covered in colors. The rippling blue of the lake, green of the trees, and the sky, a twisted mix of pink and red. "That's one of a kind. You'll be the only one in all of Panem to have that." He smiled as Prim took the drawing from his hands and looked at it.

"Like a Peeta Mellark original?" she asked.

"You can tell people you knew me before…" he looked around the skimpy compartment. "All of this happened."

"Thanks, Peeta," Prim said, holding the drawing close to her chest. "Even a little bit of home helps. I have to go to class now, but thanks for showing me the compartment, Katniss."

Katniss gave her sister a hug. She hated that she couldn't walk Prim back to her compartment and ensure she got there safely, but their daily meeting with Wiress was about to begin, and they didn't have time to waste by being late.

XXXX

"Green."

The tips of Peeta's fingers ghosted across Katniss's arm as they watched District 13 go from blue to green at their command. The light from the television illuminated the otherwise dark compartment just enough for Katniss to see Peeta's arms wrapped around her torso, his fingers dancing across her skin as he whispered colors into her ear.

It was soothing for both of them. After another meeting with Wiress where nothing new was learned, neither Katniss or Peeta were in the best of moods. And the positive effects of Peeta's visit to the surface appeared to be non-existent.

"Orange," Peeta whispered, nipping at Katniss's earlobe.

With almost no effort, green made way for orange. The former color swirled upward, rapidly dissipating as though it were being sucked straight out of the world as the orange tincture bled into the clouds and cascaded down to the earth.

A gust of wind picked up dust as Peeta's hand traveled lower, whirling specks of brown through the orange when he reached Katniss's bare thigh. She spun around in Peeta's arms to face him. Using the light from the television to guide her, she pressed a hand to his bare chest and moved to wrap it around the back of his neck, pulling him down into a deep and ravenous kiss that Peeta returned in earnest, desperate to feel something.

He pushed his hands under her shirt and his tongue slid between her parted lips as they settled into a more serene rhythm, getting lost in each other's touches and sounds. They allowed it to guide them.

Katniss threw her leg over Peeta's hips and pulled herself up, settling down to feel him half hard underneath her. She ground herself into it, and Peeta sat up and secured his arms around her, pulling her body even closer before rocking his hips, driving his arousal into Katniss's cloth covered center. There was a familiarity in the action that instantly brought Katniss back to the grove where she and Peeta would sit together, using the friction created between their bodies to tease each other before a shred of clothing was ever shed.

As slow and deliberate as their movements were, and no matter how good it felt to feel Peeta growing harder against her aching middle, there was a desperation in their actions that had nothing to do with their need for each other. It was as though they were trying to find a solace they hadn't felt in weeks, a solace they left behind in District 12.

Between Peeta's drawings and how easy it'd become for Katniss to change the colors of a district as desolate as 13, she was longing for home more than ever. In that moment, Katniss wanted to revel in her time with Peeta. She wanted to close her eyes and let the old feelings consume her and bring her back to a time where everyone just seemed happier, despite the struggles that still awaited them, ready to pounce the very first chance they got.

But she couldn't.

The pit in her stomach that'd existed since the day she and Peeta arrived in District 13 had grown into a brick. It weighed her down more and more every single day, and not even being with Peeta could help her forget about it anymore.

With a frustrated sigh, she pulled away from Peeta's lips and looked him in the eyes. "Do you ever wonder if it'd been easier if I'd just let the Mockingjay hunters kill me when they had the chance?"

"Never," Peeta said resolutely, kissing her neck.

"Well, you should," Katniss said, sliding off of Peeta's lap and sitting down on the mattress, pulling her knees up to her chest.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Peeta snapped.

"If they killed me like they were supposed to, none of you would be suffering now because of me," Katniss said.

Peeta laughed. "Suffering because of you? Katniss, Panem was suffering long before you were even born. I figured with as much time as you used to spend with Gale, you'd understand that this is bigger than you, than me.. than us."

"So now you suddenly agree with Gale?" Katniss spat. "What happened to Gale's words mean nothing?"

"Yeah," Peeta nodded. "What happened to that, Katniss?"

And there it was. Katniss's admission that she had a moment of doubting Peeta's trust after what Gale said to her hadn't come back up since it was revealed in Wiress's compartment the week before, but Katniss knew it was still bothering Peeta, even if he hadn't said anything.

"This has nothing to do with that," Katniss hissed. "And for you to bring that back up now? I thought you were better than that, Peeta."

"Are you sure?" Peeta asked, his expression sour. "Telling me that I should be wishing the hunters killed you has nothing to do with the fact that you still think that deep down I want you dead?"

"It doesn't!" Katniss yelled.

"Then what was it supposed to mean?" Peeta asked again.

"It was easier in District 12," Katniss said softly. "I could have saved all of you from this if they would've killed me."

"It was not easier in District 12!" Peeta argued. "I lived in fear every single day. Fear that was so strong that I didn't even want to go home at night. People were dying every hour and their bodies were left to decompose in the streets. District 12 was hardly the utopia you seem to think it was, Katniss. It was different for you, being hidden in that grove. And I know that's true because the only time I wasn't terrified or miserable was when I was there with you."

"Why does it feel like everything that no matter what I say, you have to find a way to disagree with me?" Katniss asked. "When Prim was here you made District 12 sound like everything we were missing. And now suddenly it's not again? And you can't tell me you're not miserable now."

"I am," Peeta admitted. "I'm more miserable here than I've ever been. Even…"

"With me," Katniss whispered, finishing Peeta's sentence.

Peeta's silence and diverted gaze was the only confirmation that she needed, but she couldn't be angry with him. How could she be angry when she felt the exact same way?

"At least we were able to keep each other happy in the grove," Katniss said. "We can't even do that here. We can't do anything here. All of these meetings and training sessions? What are they for? Nothing is getting better here. It's getting worse. We are getting worse, and I can't do this anymore."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying I want us to leave!" Katniss cried, scooting over to the side of the two beds that was hers, making it clear that she didn't not want Peeta close that night. She pulled the covers over her shoulders and turned her back to Peeta. "I won't do this anymore."

XXXX

The shrill and rhythmic chiming forced its way into Katniss's dream, ringing out like a foghorn and tearing down the peaceful and serene vision of dipping her toes into the lake. And suddenly she was shaking - no, she being shook.

"Katniss!" Peeta cried. "Wake up!"

Her eyes shot open, burning with the unexpected bright light that filled the compartment. She focused on Peeta hastily pulling a night shirt over his head as he grabbed a pair of pants and dropped them onto the bed in front of Katniss.

"Put them on!" he instructed grabbing for his shoes. "We gotta go!"

He had to yell over the alarm that was still sounding in the compartment in pulse-like wails that seared her ears. It only lowered once, and a voice began to seep out from the doorbell speaker.

"All District 13 residents are to report to ground zero immediately," the monotone voice said. "Where they will be secured into the bomb shelters."

"Bomb shelters?" Katniss asked, joining Peeta in his frenzied movements. "What's going on?"

"I don't know," Peeta said, checking to make sure Katniss had her pants and shoes on. "Let's go. We can ask questions later."

Their compartment door slid open and they were immediately immersed in chaos. Other residents filing out of their compartments in attempts to make it to the stairwells clogged the hallway, loud yells and cries could be heard as the complaints rolled in. Katniss and Peeta were stuck in the doorway of their compartment with nowhere to go.

"Get out of the way!" A voice yelled before Haymitch came into view, fighting his way through the crowd to get to Katniss and Peeta. He waved them toward him. "Follow me!"

"My sister!" Katniss yelled. "I have to go get her!"

"She's two floors up!" Haymitch yelled back. "You'll never get through!"

Katniss didn't care. She refused to go to the bomb shelter without her sister. She took off toward the crowded stairwell and pushed through as many people as she could, ignoring Haymitch's calls for her to stop.

She managed to make it up an entire floor before the congestion of the crowd became too much for her to push through.

"Are you stupid?!" Haymitch hissed, finally catching up and grabbing Katniss's arm. "Do you even know-"

"Katniss!"

Prim. Katniss could recognize her voice anywhere. She searched through the crowd frantically, finally seeing her sister and mother waving madly, trying to get her attention. She said nothing as she forced her way to them, grabbing their arms and pulling them through the crowd to her and back to where Haymitch stood impatiently. She looked around for Peeta. He had to be somewhere close if Haymitch had made it through.

"Where's Peeta?" Katniss finally asked.

"Still at your compartment," Haymitch explained. "He said it'd be easier if just one us went after you."

It was harder getting through the crowd a second time to get to Peeta. Instead of one person pushing through the dozens of nervous residents, four bodies were forcing their way through, eliciting angered shouts and shoves from the others.

Finally, they made it back to where they'd started. Their end of the hall had thinned out considerably, leaving the furthest half almost empty. And as Katniss scanned the small crowd of people that still remained, she realized one thing very quickly - Peeta was nowhere to be found.

Thanks to ichooseupeetachu for prereading and cheerleading :)