How Shepard Are You Actually?

Check all that apply:

You like to have fun.

You like to have fun, with alcohol.

You like to have fun, with alcohol, preferably with a lush of a drinking partner.

You pretty much drink with Tali or Wrex.

You drink ryncol because someone said you couldn't.

You drink elasa because you think it's sophisticated.

You have shot someone in the face.

Lots of times.

And laughed.

You have missed shooting someone in the face.

Lots of times.

And Garrus laughed at you.

You yell at people as you omni-blade them.

Sometimes you yell special things.

Like 'muahahaha!'

Or 'ooh, that's hurts, don't it?'

Or 'That's for _, you son of a bitch!'

Or the classic, 'eat it!'

You think biotic blasts are pretty.

You use cryo ammo because it explodes your enemies into pieces and that's AWESOME!

You pause in the middle of a firefight to give 'googly' eyes to Liara.

Lots of times.

In a single firefight.

Seriously.

You are an honorary krogan.

Grunt calls you 'Mommy'

You have head-butted people to keep them in their place.

Lots of times.

You have absolutely zero fucks to give about what any dalatrass has to say.

You blubbered for Legion.

Thane was your Soul-Bro

And Mordin's singing made you cry.

Your assault rifle is your 'baby'

Your pistol is your 'baby'

Pretty much every gun is your 'baby'

Don't touch your babies.

You visit Liara's office every time you pass it.

And come out with a stupid grin.

Your armor is the shit.

Because you spend waaaaay too much time messing with it.

You tell other people what to wear.

And don't let them off the ship otherwise.

You invite people up to your cabin for pep talks.

When Liara comes up, that's a different story.

Your mind is sexy.

And that ass doesn't hurt.

You have pretty much saved everyone's ass at some point.

You jog EVERYWHERE.

But you constantly run out of breath.

You have a gazillion favorite stores on the Citadel.

Journalists make your ass twitch.

You can't go anywhere without someone trying to kill you.

You dance like you just don't care.

Your driving, like your dancing, should really matter more to you.

You have personally pillaged every planet in the galaxy.

You squealed the first time someone called your quarian bestie "Tali'Zorah vas Normandy'

You feed your fish even though you spent a stupid amount of credits on a VI.

Speaking of VIs, you're thinking of installing the Shepard VI in the cockpit just to see the look on Joker's face.

Your hamster is as unruly as you are.

You wish you could have a pet varren.

People hit on you.

Lots.

And you give zero fucks, because look at that blue mf face! Li's gorgeous!

You've sexiled the galaxy for some blue action on multiple occasions.

You have the uncanny ability to find ancient, supposedly dead races.

You've daydreamed about fighting yourself in battle.

Then you did it.

And won.

Or did you…

Sometimes you just look at all the pretty stars out the port observation deck.

You make pew pew noises as you play with your ship models.

You've appeared in a Blasto film as yourself.

You've thrown a party just to get Liara drunk.

Who are you kidding?

Ok, getting your entire squad drunk was kinda the goal that night.

You own an excessive amount of weapon mods.

You pick up anything you find.

Finders keepers, am I right?

You've flipped off the Illusive Man.

And the Council.

Several times.

It felt reeeeeaaaalllly good.

You've been to Hell and back.

You've killed mf Reapers, son!

Personally.

Shit. Got. Real.

You will lead the galaxy to victory if you have to kick everyone's collective ass the whole way through.

You will win.

You will win and live.

You are mf Commander Shepard.