Author's note: Hey guys and welcome to my first Destiel story ever. This won't be a long story, only two chapters, but I hope you will like it :) Got the idea while listening to an awesome song (not gonna tell the title before I uploaded the second chapter,hehe)
I hope you guys will like my little story and a special thanks to APerfectGrace for beta-reading this chapter!

I do not own Supernatural and its awesome characters. (unfortunately..)

Yellow Ribbon

THEN

It's over.

Finally.

All the fallen angels are going back to heaven.

The Winchesters saved the world, again. The only things that remind them of the fight against Metatron are the bruises on their bodies and the pain that they are constantly feeling. Who cares about bruises if you can finally 'settle down' and only hunt small spirits?

"Huh, it really is over."

"About damn time, Sammy."

Sam chuckled and picked up his shotgun. "Let's go home."

Dean gave his brother a nod and turned to his angel in the dirty trench coat, who, again, fought by Dean's side. "Cas, are you coming? We're heading home." Of course Castiel would come with them, he is family. Never again would Dean leave his best friend behind. Never. He and Sam started to walk to Dean's beloved Baby, but the angel did not move an inch.

"Hey Cas. Could you please move your feathery ass towards the car? Sam and I are tired. We need some rest, y'know, after saving the world again. Cas? Dude, can you hear me?"

The angel did not say anything.

Suddenly a strange feeling began to flow through Dean's body. Confused he looked at his brother, who seemed to feel the same.

Dean took a step away from Baby towards Castiel. "Cas, you're coming with us, right?"

Right? Cas would come with them. Of course he would. Why wouldn't he? They are family. He knows that..right?

But there still was no answer from his angel and Dean started to panic, of course he would never admit that.

Castiel looked at Dean. Is blue eyes full of regret and excuses. "I am sorry, Dean."

The heart of the elder Winchester started to beat faster. "What are you talking about?"

The blue eyed angel sighed and broke their eye contact. "I have to return, Dean. I have to go back to heaven. I cannot come with you. I am truly sorry."

And with those words Dean's world began to break. His legs did not want to move anymore and he fell back on Baby's hood. He looked at Castiel disbelievingly. He is lying, right? Castiel is finally learning how to tell jokes. He would never leave them - leave him - behind, right? Castiel would stay by his side like he had all these years. He needs Dean. And Dean needs him. Dean needs him more than he like to admit. He remembers how he felt after Castiel died because of the Leviathans. How he felt after he came back from purgatory without his angel. How this hole in his heart would not close until he saw him again. He was not complete if Castiel wasn't by his side.

And now Castiel is telling him that he will leave. That he will leave him and..never..come...back..?

"Okay. Right, I'm sorry. You have to do your duties. You know where you can find us. You'll come back, right?"

Dean hates how broken he sounds, but at this moment he couldn't give a fucking shit about it. He couldn't give a fucking shit about how Sam was looking at him. He couldn't give a fucking shit about how his whole body starts to tremble. He wanted an answer, now.

"Cas. You're coming back." It was more an order than a question. Castiel HAS TO come back.

The angel decides to look at Dean again. "I..I do not know."

"You don't know what, Cas?" His voice began to rise and Dean could feel his anger building up inside him.

"I do not know if I will come back.. I am sor-"

"Don't you dare say sorry! Don't you.. just don't fucking dare, okay?!"

Castiel still holds the eye contact. He knew that Dean would not understand, but he cannot blame him. Castiel did not want to leave; he had to. He had to leave to make things right up in heaven. He cannot put himself before his brothers and sisters again. He has to do this even if it hurts to leave Sam and Dean behind. But to be completely honest, Castiel never had expected such a reaction from Dean. He knew he would be angry, but what really made him think over his decision was the pure hurt and fear in the hunter's eyes. And again Castiel was being selfish. Again he puts his feelings before the hunter's feelings. It hurts so much to see those green eyes silently crying in agony. Crying for him not to leave.. not to leave him.

"Dean.." his voice steady as ever. "Let me explain."

"No."

"Dean.." Castiel was pleading now. He never pleads. But this was Dean. He never is the same when Dean is by his side. The angel lives when Dean is with him.

"I said no. Damn it!" Angrily Dean jumped from the hood and reached for the door of the Impala.

"Dean, just let Cas expl-"

"Don't Sammy, just.. don't, okay?! I don't want to hear his explanation. If he wants to leave, let him go! I won't stop him. Get inside the car Sam, we're going home." And with these words Dean turned his back to Castiel and got into his car.

The younger Winchester desperately looked from Dean to Cas and back. He knows the anger is speaking through his brother right now, but he also knows that Dean is too much of a dickhead to admit it.

"Cas, I'm-"

"It's okay Sam. Thank you for everything." Finally the blue eyed angel broke his one-sided eye contact with Dean.

"Yeah, no problem man. You helped us a lot, too. So.. thanks." He nervously rubbed his neck. "Guess this is a good bye then?"

Castiel nods. "Good bye, Sam. Take care."

"Sammy! Get inside, now! Or I'm driving without you."

"I'm sorry, Cas.." He gave the angel an apologetic look and got into the car.

Within seconds Dean started the engine and drove away without looking back. His eyes were fixed on the street and his knuckles were white from the tight grip he held on the steering wheel.

"Dean.." The younger Winchester started.

"Sam, no."

"But..-"

"Please, okay? Just.. let it go."

Sam looked at his brother and sighed. They saved the world and now everything seemed to break down regardless.

It took them 4 hours to get to the bunker. No words were spoken in those 4 hours and it was not getting any better.

As soon as they arrived the bunker, Dean went to the kitchen, got a whole bottle of whiskey and disappeared in his room. It was pointless to talk to him right now, Sam knew that. And he knew something more.

He decided that he would need a drink, too. How can he cheer up his brother when the person he loves just disappeared out of his life? Right, you can't do that.

Days came and went and nothing changed. Dean was lying on his bed and starring at the ceiling. He drank. He slept. He drank again and slept again. And all the time he waited. But Cas never came.

No, Dean Winchester was not grieving. He never does. He just will do it the Winchester way. Ignore your feelings and drink. Drink until you cannot feel anything.

Lazily he reached for his whiskey bottle only to realize that it's empty.

"Oh damn it!" Even his whiskey is leaving him.

Too lazy to get a new one, Dean just decided to stay in bed. Still starring at the ceiling he decided he needed a new position. So he rolled over and now was starring at.. wait, what?

Right in front of him is a yellow ribbon on the table with a small piece of paper.

For the first time after days Dean left the bed. His legs were a bit wobbly from all the lying and drinking. It took him some seconds to get control over his legs again. Slowly he went to the table and took the piece of paper. His heart started to beat faster, while he was opening the small paper.

Two words. Only two words and a yellow ribbon were required to finally let the feelings take control over Dean Winchester. With a loud bang he fell on the floor, tears running down his face. No, he would not cry. He just wouldn't. He was not a whiny bitch. Dean Winchester was a man, a man who won't cry after another man. But he could not stop himself from crying. He just couldn't.

He never really realized how Sam was storming into is room, eyes full of panic. He never realized how Sam knelt beside him and asked him what happened. He never realized how pitiful his brother was looking at him when he saw the ribbon and the note. No, Dean had only eyes for the piece of paper and the yellow ribbon in his hands. The last two things he got from his angel.

Just two simple words made him realize how much he loved him. Now he was gone and left Dean with a ribbon and two simple last words.

"Forgive me."