White. All it was was pure white. It was shaped like a normal hospital room, but white. The sheets on the beds were white. The curtains were also white. And now looking at it, the water looked white. No other way but to say it was white.

It was also very cold. A white spray painted vent on the ceiling blew down over the bed. The sheets were so thin, you go to sleep every night in a little ball, not being able to feel your toes and if you are lucky to get to feel your hands.

It was hard to scratch your back in one of these beds. Because for the most part, you were strapped down by legs and most times the arms. Image frantically kicking in bed, but you can't go anywhere, but the tip of your nose feels funny.

At first it was thought of a speck. Then a breeze. Then hair. And somewhere far along the road, you got to the point where you feel there was something living sitting there. You can't see it, because now it's black.

You can't touch it, because you are strapped down, and you can't cry out, because no one will come. The trick to staying sane here was to think of nothing. Most people were here because of what they thought or remember. But think of nothing but white.

Sometimes I like to think of orange or blue or some other color sprayed on the walls. There were rare occasions when I would give the slightest smirk as I shivered, seeing the rainbow of 20 different colors I never knew along the wall.

But I didn't like to smile or grin or anything. It makes the purple rings around my eyes look worse. It was also hard to count the days. There was a window, but it was well hidden beyond the white. In my free time, I liked to feel the wall to try and feel if I can find it.

It was okay for me, since all I could see were shapes and colors and… And that's about it. I could barely see, so I never used my eyes. I used to use them when I lived on the outside world. But there's no point in using them when they are in this concision in this place.

But I liked it. It sounds a shame. A half blind girl. Not really. Because if you know how to make the best of the bad, you get new things or positive things that you will like in time or find useful. Because thinking the worst of bad things and never the good, can lead to what you will always remember quicker. Like most of the people in here.

Now you must be thinking. I sound so smart and wise and not insane. But where I sit and where I stay and what I say, says different. I didn't like to talk, because everyone thought I was crazy. I didn't smile because it creeped people out.

What a shame. I am living in this world to please people. But if I don't talk or smile or do much of anything, people worry I am ill. I am ill, but not ill enough to be in here. But it was quiet. So quiet.

The outside world seemed so much worse. Maybe not for all of you, maybe not for most of you. But there are people like me and maybe you who know this truth without me telling it. Somethings a better left untold then exploited.

And something's are better kept secret or hiding then reviled. I find it better for people to not know unless absolutely necessary. "No, I did not do that." "Yes I did do that because…" It was simple. You could tell when someone was lying, because no one knows how to because they never found it useful.

It's like acting, but all you are doing is reading one simple sentence you made in your mind. Here there is no need for lying. Here I can be open. Because no one thinks it strange to be the way I am here. If I was good for the whole week, they gave me a treat.

I would ask for a cookie, they would give me two. Once I asked for cake, they gave me a little cookie. But it was ok since it had caramel in it. If it was your birthday and you had been good, you get cake. But it was bland and cardboard flavored.

But there was something new that was happening. I hear an extra pair of footsteps outside my door every day now. I got so many ideas. Maybe there was a visitor for someone, or maybe somewhere getting let go… Or maybe they were escaping. But there would be an alarm, so I had to cross that off.

It was a normal everyday day as far as I knew. The nurse came in, gave me my pills, and asked if I was ok and slept well, I gave her my honesty. Then she left a little annoyed. So I sat there. Today was extra cold.

I wasn't used to it, so I pulled the sheets over my head and around my body. If I take a simple breath and let it out all the way, I could see it just the slightest bit. When I saw it the first time, I stopped shaking and then right away started again.

My teeth chattered as I looked for all the corners of my room again. Then I heard someone. They were talking. So I was guessing there was someone else.

"This is a horrifying idea." One of them said. "But it is ordered for each AND every one of them." The other explained. "Yes I suppose." The other gave in. You see, I have this supersonic hearing. Because I have some of the sixth sense and my other senses are stronger because of my lack of eyesight, I could hear past my three inch thick iron door.

The door opened and one walked in. "Hey…" I heard in a nice voice. I looked start ahead of myself. "Do you want to go outside for a little while?" The women asked. I looked slowly over at her. "Yeah, I got your attention didn't I?"

She started to slowly walk over. I flinched back. She stops and backs up. "If you want to, just get out of bed and take my hand." She holds out her arm. I kept shivering. I took off the sheets, but as I started to slip off the edge of the bed, I grabbed hold of the sheets.

The floor was even colder. "I can get a nicer blanket and let you keep it if you come with me." She offers with a higher pitch in her voice. I let my toes touch the floor as my white night gown fell with the rest of me.

I wobbled as I tried to stand up right, but I had to hunch a little. I slipped, but she grabbed me and slowly guided me out of my room. It was still white… What good was it to take me out if I still saw white? Or more of it I suppose…

We stopped. "Stay right there." She says very slowly as she carefully let go of my arm. I tried to lean out and grab her, but she was already too far away. She takes out keys, I knew because of the familiar jingling noise.

So put it in a lock and opened a door. "Now… I can give you grey or white, but you can get away with a special color if you like…" I opened my eyes a little wider as I see a rainbow. I right away tried to reach out and grab one, but she had to hold me back.

"Just one…" She says as she struggles. I then grabbed a black one with a dark red inside. Or it could be the other way around… "Okay, is that the one you want?" She lets me go. I wrap it around myself and get one my knees and curl up a little.

"Alright then…" She lets out a deep breath. She gets me back up. Now I just wanted to go back to my little cell… "Have you ever been outside?" She asks. I slowly shake my head. She paused. "Well, it's a bit of a gloomy day, but it's better than nothing…"

We kept walking around an endless maze until we got to a bit of a warmer part. And there were these giant double doors I have never seen before. She took out her keys and opened one of them. Then heaven dropped in.

When she lightly pushed open the door, a bright golden ray of sunshine came in. It was faint, but I had to cover my eyes. Birds chirped and it almost sounded like there were angels nearby. "Oh, that's just the church across the street…" She pushes me out a little.

"Maybe one day, I can take you there." She seems to smile as we go out. But when we actually got outside, the sunlight faded away and the birds chirped lesser and lesser. The sky was grey and foggy like. It was a little chillier than what I remembered it to be, but it was better than that room.

She let me go as I walked barefoot on the cleared pavement. I just kept walking. We were standing alone out there. The sides of the dark red bricked building we were just in felt like they were trying to pull me back in. All the windows were tinted black from out here.

I could go running, and running and sprinting and... I thought all this as I wobbled farther away. She stopped me after a while of walking away. "Sorry, we have to go back now..." She takes my hand and guides me back.

My eyes still burned from the light of outside. I saw strange glowing things appear in my sight, then disappear. I then rubbed my eyes and look around. As I did, I could SEE out my window. It was night... I think.

There was something shooting across the black so it must have been something. If I make a wish, it could give me hope that someone out there is still watching over me. "I wish for a friend..." I say lightly.

A nurse came in, looking rushed. "What is wrong?" She asks. "I was just talking to myself..." I look right ahead. She sighs and closes the door. I lay back and counted the seconds the light would turn out.

4...3...2...1... Pitch black. I dreamed of what they would look like, what they would sound like and smell like. It was fuzzy, everything, even their smell. As I slept, thinking this, I had a nightmare. I didn't have a single memory of it, it was just scary I guess…

But it must have jinxed my wish, because now when I opened my eyes in the dark, I heard a voice. Oh god, oh god... Its nothing, you're insane remember? I tell myself. But the voice kept saying something.