Chapter 8

He found himself back on the Enterprise one week later shipping out for another five-year mission. The hallways seemed as familiar as always. His med bays where he ruled with a strong, firm hand felt more familiar to him than the hospital of Georgia had ever felt. His commendations and achievements covered his office walls.

It was not until the tail end of the five-year mission, a hologram from Joanna with her wedding pictures and the announcement of the birth of his first grandchild that had finally arrived from a distant star base, that Leonard finally wondered if fifteen years was enough. They had charted most of the Alpha Quadrant. He was no longer young. The academy was more insistent than ever that he accept the position of head of Starfleet Medical.

Even Spock and Uhura were leaving after this mission to start a family. Spock was thinking of accepting the position of ambassador of Vulcan to Romulus to negotiate for possible reunification with the Romulans. Sulu had received his promotion to captain of the Excelsior, the newest ship in the fleet. It inevitably meant that Chekov would follow. Chapel was considering returning to Starfleet Medical to pursue a MD. He knew Scotty would never leave the Enterprise as long as she was space worthy, but there were rumors over the subspace frequency that the admiralty were thinking of decommission her upon their return to Earth. She was no longer young. The latest technology had long surpassed the warp core and modules that she was still running on.

One night as they neared the final unchartered sector of the Alpha Quadrant, he found himself nursing a bottle of old fashion Tennessee whiskey in the aft observation deck. The stars zoomed past. However, Spock would say that assessment was illogical, and they were really passing the stars. Over the years, he began to agree with Jim. They really were beautiful. They seemed like the only constants in his life.

"Sorry Jim," he muttered. He took a swing from the bottle.

"Doctor McCoy." Spock's voice carried through the observation deck.

For once, he did not have the energy to make a snarky comment to Spock. He merely rose his glass in the direction of where Spock's voice came from.

"We're approaching our coordinates."

"Thank you, Spock." When he did not hear the swish of the door announcing Spock's departure, he turned around. He found that the half Vulcan was still standing behind him. His face was as expressionless as ever. Leonard sighed. "Is there something else?"

"I have inferred from past experiences that you would want to be on the bridge. You are looking for something Doctor. Commander Uhura once told me you had joined Starfleet to 'chase starlight'." His eyebrow rose. Even after all these years, Spock never did manage to develop his human emotions.

"A foolish man's dream."

"Since this will be our final mission, the captain wants us to accompany him on the away mission."

Leonard raised his glass once more. "I'll meet you on the transporter room then, Spock." Spock left after that.

When he arrived at the transporter pad with his tricorder strapped to his hip, he had missed the mission briefing. He did not even know the name of the planet they were beaming down to when the technician energized the pad.

He found himself on a lush green planet. They had visited many Eden like planets during their travels. However, experience taught him that there was always something sinister about those planets. He immediately reached for his phaser. He cursed when he realized it was missing along with his medical tricorder. In fact, he was only member of the landing party who had even materialized on the planet.

He cursed, wondering what strange transporter malfunction had caused such a mishap to occur. He never did trust them. He never could comprehend why they couldn't just take the damn shuttles that they always carried around in the shuttle bay. He had experienced many transporter malfunctions over the years, but never one like this. He was contemplating how to reestablish contact with the Enterprise when a green bush rustled. He instinctively reached for a phaser that he knew was not there.

His eyes widened when the source of the noise appeared into view.

"Bones?" It was a name he had not been called in nearly two decades. It was given to him by a man he had not seen in equally that long.

"Jim?"

The kid appeared before him. His eyes were still as blue as the deep blue seas. Even after so many years, the kid did not seem to have gotten any older. He looked as youthful and as vibrant as ever. The only signs of the passage of time were the small wrinkles that seemed to appear around Jim's eyes.

"Bones, what are you doing here? Why are you here?"

"I thought that was pretty obvious."

"Enlighten me."

"To find you, Kid." The words left his lips easier than he thought was possible.

Jim's eyes widened. "No, no Bones! Fuck! No! This is all wrong."

"I thought you would be happy to see me, Jim." Leonard suddenly realized just how hurt he must have sounded when he saw Jim flinch.

"Yes! No! Fuck! No Bones! You and Jocelyn were good! I saw it. You guys had reconciled. You were supposed to live that perfect life you always wanted: the large houses, the beautiful wife and the 2.3 kids with a successful career all packaged in one." Jim seemed to be rambling.

Leonard grabbed his arm. "Jim! Jim!"

"What?"

"First of all, 2.3 kids are well… illogical. Also what if I don't want that perfect life?"

"You're supposed to! Fuck, everyone deserves that perfect, normal life."

"Then, what about you Jim?"

"Me?"

"Yes, you. You never got your chance."

"I died Bones, and it seems I destroyed your life too." Jim narrowed his eyes.

"No, Jim." He shook his head. Only then did he realize the accomplishments and the life he had lived. The worlds he had seen, the places and times that he had been too. All of which had been denied from Jim. "I learned a long ago perfection isn't everything."

"Then what do you want?"

"You."

Jim shook his head. He pushed away from Leonard. Only then did Leonard realize how close they had been standing. "Bones, I told you. You can't fall in love a dead man."

"But what if I already have, Jim? What if I fell in love the day I met you?"

"But you can't. You have a life. A destiny you're supposed to live and people who will miss you."

"I've lived a lifetime Jim. I have seen the stars. I have seen countless new worlds and different timelines. I've made my contributions to the world."

He wondered if only then did Jim really look at him. He seemed to recognize the blue tunic with the Starfleet insignia that was pinned on his chest. "You joined Starfleet?"

"Yeah, I'm stationed on a starship called the Enterprise."

"But you said you were afraid of flying."

It had been an offhanded remark Leonard made the last time they saw each other. Leonard was surprised Jim still remembered. "And you gave me the reason to not be." Leonard pulled Jim down. They sat on a large boulder. It was bright red.

"And in all those other timelines and multiverses I have traveled to there was always a starship Enterprise with seven crewmembers that always existed together except this one. They all had a Sulu, a Chekov, a Scotty, an Uhura, a Spock, a McCoy and a Jim Kirk as her captain."

"Captain…" Jim's eyes widened. Long ago, Jim had told him what he dreamed of doing had he gotten the chance to live. The first time he traveled to another timeline and met that world's Jim. He had seen a Jim that was alive and was 'his' captain. He had seen the love that that Jim had for his Leonard. He did not want to leave that world. He wanted that Leonard's life. He wanted that timeline.

Jim shook his head. "But those aren't this world."

"And for a time, I didn't want this world either. The Kelvin, I traveled to a world that had met the Narada before this one, the world that had damaged it. They told us the moment the Narada appeared before the Kelvin was what had created that world. It follows that this universe was also created from a similar moment. I even had a chance to collapse this world. I thought a world without Jim Kirk shouldn't exist."

"But you didn't."

Leonard shook his head. "Then there would be no us. After my first temporal displacement experience, I learned Jim. I want this universe. I want to make an 'us' in this universe."

Jim shook his head sadly. "But I'm dead. I don't exist in this world."

"In all those universes, all the Jim Kirks shared similar traits. They all didn't believe in no-win scenarios." Jim laughed. "I feel. After all these years, I also don't. I found you. In life or in death, I found you." Leonard reached for a piece of paper in his breast pocket that he had kept for nearly two decades. He placed it in Jim's hands. When the other smoothed it out, he laughed.

"Damn." Jim whispered.

"And I feel the Jim Kirk in this universe don't believe in them either."

On the piece of paper was a constellation. The same constellation that Leonard knew if he threw his head back now, he would see in the sky above them.

"What now Bones?"

"Nearly twenty years ago, I let you disappear before me. I chased the stars for you Jim Kirk, and I ain't leaving you now."

"But I'm dead."

"Then I'll die too if it means never leaving you. I appeared here with nothing but my bones. Starfleet can list me as haven died in action. Joanna is grown, married and with a child. I have lived a full life without you Jim. Let me live or die the rest with you."

"Okay Bones. Okay."

This time, when Leonard leaned forward, for once, Jim did not shove him away. Jim tasted of everything that he had imagined: of dreams and hopes that he had harbored for a lifetime.

When he finally pulled away, Leonard looked at Jim. He really looked at him. "Jim."

"Mhmm," Jim whispered.

"Where are your wings?"

"I never earned them." Jim shrugged his shoulders.

He raised an eyebrow. "But…"

"Shh," Jim silenced him with another kiss. "I fell in love with a mortal," he mumbled.

This is where the chronicles of Leonard Horatio McCoy end, and where the myths begins. His Starfleet records list him as missing in action due to a transporter accident on his final five-year mission aboard the USS Enterprise. However, some travelers will say in the darkest of nights, they can see a silver starship sailing through the galaxy. Sometimes that ship will land on some planet and from it; a cankerous doctor with his blond haired captain will appear, always by starlight and always together.

Fin

Author's Note: The prompt was Jim's a probationary guardian angel newly assigned to overworked doctor Leonard McCoy.