Three weeks after Augustus died, I started feeling slightly sick. Like, not just cancer sick, but something different. I tried to ignore it, thinking it would pass, but every morning was the same. Sick.

"Hazel?" my mom asked worriedly as she rushed into my room for the third time this morning. She looked up to see me retching all over the place, splattering my few possessions with unpleasant green blobs. I didn't have many things in my room now – too many of them reminded me of Augustus, and I couldn't cope with the hurt every day – but almost everything I did have had been touched by my puke.

"I'm fine, Mom," I told her, but she knew I wasn't.

"Oh, honey!" she exclaimed as I sat down on my bed, all puked out. Taking strands of hair off my face, she cleared up my skin with a cloth before scuttling out and returning with a larger cloth to tackle the floor.

"Hazel, are you sure we don't need to go and see someone at the hospital? If you feel like your cancer's getting worse, we need to go. Now."

I grumbled something negative in response, but she obviously took it as confirmation that we did, in fact, need to go to the hospital.

"Up! Into the car!" my mom shouted after she had finished cleaning the floor. "And yes, I'll record all of the episodes of America's Next Top Model that are on today."

I still didn't feel like going to the hospital, but ANTM was a good bribe.

I dragged myself out of my room, still in my pink, stripy pyjamas and my fluffy slippers, and almost managed to make it to the car by myself before my mom decided I needed help.

"Honestly, Mom, I'm fine," I protested weakly, but she still walked me to the car door and helped me in.

"That's what you said before you were taken in last time," she replied, sighing. "I just want to make sure you're okay. I don't want to lose you as suddenly as…"

"As Augustus?" I shot back. "You didn't lose Augustus, Mom. I did. His parents did. The only kid you'll lose to the shitty thing they call cancer is me."

Mom didn't say anything else until we got to the hospital.

The ambulances outside the hospital blared their sirens even though they'd already arrived at their destination. I tried to ignore them as we walked in to the Emergency Department, but found myself wondering about the stories of the people in them. Their life, their friends, their family. Augustus had rubbed off on me again.

"Do you have any idea what could have caused this?" Mom asked as she rushed in, dragging me by the arm. "Y'know, in case they ask you directly or anything."

I contemplated the question for a moment before answering. "Nope. They said that my cancer wasn't getting any worse, so I don't know."

Mom sighed. "Your guess is as good as mine, honey." That was a trademark mom phrase she liked to use. I wanted to nag her about it, but knew from the look on her face that she was already stressed enough.