Please swallow your pride if I have things you need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs that you won't let show
You just call on me, brother, when you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on

'Lean on me' Bill Withers

It was pretty subtle at first, almost invisible, just like the first traces of winter air, pushing themselves among the golden hue of autumn. It could have well passed unseen by everyone. But Hans realized. And as much as he would have fed his ego on the thought that he'd realized because he was just a step ahead of everyone in Arandelle, the truth was incredibly less flattering.

He realized because lately he'd often caught himself staring at Elsa. Greedily drinking in the sight of her skin, the movement of her neck, the silkiness of her hair.

'Well, I'm a guy, after all' he would half-apologetically tell himself, feeling so humilliated by the thought alone that he had to fight the urge to hide among the horses he worked with, but he knew it was a poor excuse. Servants and peasants and farmboys could allow themselves such a lame excuse, but him? Despite his present situation, he had still been raised a prince. To find himself rendered to such an inmature and...gut-headed behaviour was infuriating. No matter how much he liked what he saw. Whenever he crossed her on the castle hallways, or caught her sight from the stables, or recieved her visits in the afternoon, his eyes kept wandering over her shape and then one day, while he did this...

Well, later he would think of that moment as 'The moment everything went to hell'.

Of course, he tried to appear not to have noticed. He even spent a ridiculous amount of time convincing himself that nothing was wrong and he was making a fuzz out of nothing at all. But it was hard to tell that kind of thing to himself when he knew that, if there was something he was good at, that was reading people and to him Elsa was like an open book -granted, one incredibly complicated, metaphore-filled book, the kind of book you need to read dozens of times because each time you find something new and the sentences have a new meaning and it hits home in a different way.

"Anything bothering you?" he finally brought himself to ask, one afternoon, right after he handed back the book she'd lent him. Perhaps it was his tone -he'd sounded a tad more impatient than he'd intended to- but he saw Elsa stiffen for a second, before somewhat nervously inquiring.

"Should there be?"

He silently reached out to touch the icy swirl already growing over the covers of the book.

"You've been leaving these everywhere for the past few days" he half-chatized. She cringed slightly, giving him a look that made him think he was about to get ice-pierced, a look that bordered between acusing and terrified, so he continued, hoping she wouldn't connect the dots and discover his

"Should you want something else to read now that you finished this one, the royal library is open for your use" Elsa hurriedly said, getting to her feet and walking to the door, book firmly pressed to her chest as if to shield it. Hans took a step after her, practically holding himself back from taking another.

"Well, thank you, I guess..." he stammered, immediately cringing. Thank you, I guess? Kristoff's lack of class was rubbing onto him, for sure, he squared his shoulders, frowning slightly "I would much rather have an answer, though"

"I-" she stammered, nervous, and for one fleeting moment she seemed about to talk the truth, but the realization that rugged and intricate patterns of ice were now invading the walls of the room silenced her, her brow furrowing- in distress, Hans noticed. The moment passed and she fixed her face into a calm mask "...everything's fine" she continued, her voice quivery with contained emotion "...I have to go"

'Goodness, Queen Elsa, you really suck at lying. You were only lucky Anna's incredible guilelessness is proportional to your incapacity to make a credible lie, otherwise the whole keeping your ice powers to yourself for thirteen years wouldn't have happened'

He bit the words back. It was easier than saying he knew her well enough to tell her there was a certain tension in her face and movements that reminisced him of their first meeting. Or that there were circles under her eyes that hadn't been there a few days earlier. Or that he knew she didn't normally freeze everything in contact unless a storm were cooking inside her.

Because telling her that would surely make her wary of him, of how much he knew about her and how he could use it.

The bedroom's door closed behind her.

"Not that I really care, but...is there some sort of fat problem in the higher ups?"

The hard-bristled brush stopped half-way through the fur on Sven's back and a confused Kristoff glanced at Hans from over the reindeer's body. The perpetualy gold-tinged light of the stables made Hans squint his eyes slightly as he examined the metallic bridle in his hands, and reflected on Kristoff's crested medallion, painting a golden snowflake on the wall.

"Problem?" he absently scratched his nape with the brush, and Hans had to bite his mouth to stop a chuckle "...no, not really, at least none than I'm aware of. Why?"

"Queen Elsa seems...worked up about something"

"Ohhh..." Kristoff nodded comprehensively, as he resumed is task "I guess...well, it's not exactly a big deal, but...Anna's come down with a cold"

Hans breathed out, amused. Of course it would be Anna.

'But you always have to assume the worst, don't you? Admit it, you would have loved for it to be something far more pressing'

"That is all?" he asked, turning his back on Kristoff to hide his bitter smile. He hung the bridle and picked up another to examine it. During the past days he'd realized that, surprisingly enough, the riding equipment used in the Royal stables was much less than properly taken care of. The idea that Arandelle's experts on the topic couldn't compete with the knowledge of a prince who'd had quite some spare time during his childhood and therefore picked up a thing or two at his father's stables would have been indignating, had it not been so amusing.

"Well, it's nothing serious, just a common cold. She probably got it from splashing on puddles or something"

'That does sound like Anna' Hans thought, hanging the bridle on its corresponding nail and taking the next one with a little less bitterness in his smile.

"But Elsa is..." Kristoff continued "...how can I put it...?"

"Apprehensive?"

"Yeah, that's it" there was a pause, as if he were choosing what to say and what to keep to himself "...for Anna's been incredibly heart-warming, to see her this concerned about her after all those years of being apart, but...geez, Elsa's worrying up a storm. Perhaps more than figuratively"

"Why? It's just a cold, right?" Hans inquired, trying to seem focused in his task, despite the fact that, as per usual, the sole thought of Elsa and Anna's closeness sent a pang of envy through him. The few childhood illnesses her remembered had passed inadverted to his brothers.

"Like I said, just a common cold, but Elsa...well, she's a big sister, and Anna said this is the first time either of them's been sick since they lost their parents. It's kinda harsh on us older siblings to always be on the look-out for the younger ones, so when you're the only one left..." he shrugged. Hans wanted to point out how none of his brothers had shared his point of view when suddenly a thought crossed his mind.

"Wait. You have younger siblings?"he asked, finally looking up from his task. There was a slight cringe in Kristoff's expression, as if he'd just realized he was saying too much. There was a pause in which Hans mentally kicked himself- well of course Kristoff wouldn't want to talk about his family with him! Asking alone was foolish enough, but expecting an answer was beyong stupid.

"I guess we could say so, yeah..." Kristoff finally said, visibly hesitant. There was a pause in which Hans, one eyebrow cocked up (What kind of an answer was that?) could all but hear him struggling to decide wether to keep talking or not before he finished the thought "...two of them. I'm the eldest"

"The rough-housing must have been brutal" Hans absently muttered, remembering one of the few activities he'd been allowed to share with his brothers as a boy.

"Ohhh, you bet!" Kristoff's face lit up visibly, as if he'd been fearing another kind of response "They were heavy enough as toddlers, but once they began to grow...man! Sometimes I wonder how I never got a broken bone while playing with them..."

The mental image of a duo of brawny, Kristoff-faced boy and girl and a Kristoff-faced mother, pink apron and all, had him pursing his mouth frantically to stop the laughter from coming out. But another thought cut his mirth short.

"And when they get hurt or sick?" he asked, still thinking about how his brothers always 'Accidentally' ended up smothering him with their weight, or punching him much harder than strictly necessary, or twisting one of his arms a bit too far.

"They're not...they don't get sick or hurt easily" Kristoff hesitantly continued, scratching his chin with the brush pensively, which managed to produce a tight-lipped smile on Hans's account "But when it happens" he shook his head with a huff "Well, it doesn't feel great, you know? Because I always invariably end up thinking I should have taken better care of them, and sometimes I can't even help them feel a bit better, and it's frustrating because they look up to me and kind of expect me to be able to magically wisp bad stuff away"

Hans scowled slightly, eyes set on the bridle in his hands. Had there been a moment when he'd felt that way about his brothers?

'Not really. At least, not that I can remember. All I remember is feeling left behind by them and being frustrated that hard as I tried I could never reach them'

When, exactly, had his wish for their acknowledgement, his profound admiration, his yearning for a chance to prove himself to them dried up, leaving nothing but resignation and sense of defeat he never quite shook off?

"Weren't your brothers like that?" Kristoff suddenly asked, perhaps more bluntly than he'd liked. Hans felt the color drain from his face.

'Bullseye'

"I'm afraid they differ with you and Elsa as to what the obligations of an older sibling are" he muttered in feigned nonchalance. Kristoff, however, had a doubt that had been eating him ever since Hans had said what his own family had done to him, that day in the tent, weeks ago.

"But...did none of them...? You know..." he leaned forward over Sven's body, supporting himself on the forearms he rested over the fluffy-looking brown fur. Even the dammed reindeer was looking at Hans with wide, surprised eyes "Weren't you close with any of them? Any of them at all"

"It depends on what you consider 'Close', I guess" Hans continued, hanging the bridle on its corresponding nail and pretending to be too busy admiring his well-done work to give any importance to what he was saying, despite the fact that there was a pang in his chest as he spoke "The third on the line, Bo, did at least try to pretend he gave a damn...key word being 'Pretend', because he didn't either"

'He was just as silent as the rest when father looked at me as though I were a pile of filth in his carpet and pronounced my sentence, and I could hear a few of the servants indignantly muttering about the monstruousity of giving away one's own child, but none of my brothers said a word. Hell, some of them looked like they were enjoying the scene, oh, they would have loved to see how the merchants first dragged me into ther disgusting caravan, kicking and bitting, and how they had to all but beat me to pieces to get me to stop fighting-'

He felt a shiver down his spine and absently eyed a fading reddish marking of his left forearm. The merchants had tried to brand him with a hot iron, but he'd struggled and squirmed and ended up with an amorphous, blindingly painful mark, and he could still remember the smell of his own skin burning. He kept his eyes there, suddenly conscious of just how marked they'd left him. He knew the his back was filled with the white-gray reminders of the whip. His arms and legs sported lines made by the knife and the fire. His wrists where still stained where the ropes had cut into his skin and he had the feeling they weren't going to be clean anytime soon. If they ever did. Not to mention the beating, insistent ache in some of his mended limbs when the day was damp, specially his mended ribs. He'd been broken to pieces and though he'd been put back together the cracks were still there. He'd probably had it coming, 'Getting his ass kicked', as Anna had so delicatedly put it, but the nagging knowledge that Kristoff would have done everything in her power to save his siblings from a similar fate, even given the far-fetched case that they'd earned it, haunted the back of his mind for a moment.

"I can't say I blame them, we were only half-brothers and...and they probably never saw any similarities between them and me" he tiredly continued in a murmur, not realizing Kristoff was searching for something to say, eyes furiously focused on his task as if the answer were to appear among Sven's fur if he brushed well enough "The age gap between me and them was too big; their mothers where nobles, whereas mine was just an average woman. They were all princes in the whole definition, and me? I was but a runt, an embarrassment, an accident..." he fell silent, suddenly realizing to whom he was talking to and continued, regaining his nonchalant act "We were just too different to be family-"

"My siblings are trolls" Kristoff suddenly said, in a slightly indignant tone. Hans blinked.

"I'm sorry, what-?"

"Trolls. My siblings are trolls, so are my parents...well, my entire family are trolls!" he huffed, as if angry "One day, when I was around six, I wandered into their stone circle with Sven, and was adopted by one of them"

Hans had to stay silent a few moments to accept the fact that Kristoff wasn't making fun of him. Or, at least, didn't think he was.

"Trolls" he deadpanned.

"Come on! Are you telling me on your past visit to Arandelle, you didn't catch wind of 'The guy raised by trolls' among the docks? I got it everytime I came to town to sell my ice, the jerks couldn't even come up with anything better than that"

Hans shook his head. Truthfully, even if he had, his mind had been elsewhere.

"What, really? Not even-OK, know what? Nevermind. The point is" Kristoff continued "It didn't matter to them that I was human, and Sven a reindeer. They took us in and treated us as their own. Back then Bulda and Cliff, my adoptive parents, didn't have any children, but my little brother came along not much later than we did, do you think the fact that we were...well, different, stopped me from loving him and my sister, or them me?"

"What happened to your human parents?" Hans burst out, if only because Kristoff's words had stung more than he dared to admit. Kristoff's face obscured slightly and, surprisingly enough, it made Hans wish he'd said nothing. He was even close to apologizing, or as close as his ego allowed.

"That's, um...that's the question, I guess..." Kristoff muttered.

The urge to somehow make it right again overwhelmed Hans even more, he had to say something, but the only thing that came to mind was 'I'm sure something fat must have happened to them, they surely didn't mean to abandon you', which, clearly, wasn't helpfull at all.

'I guess it's too much to ask for that I don't go hurting people just by freaking talking to them, right? That's just who I am, a freaking pain'

"Either way" Kristoff continued, clearing his throat "This is how I understand how Elsa must be feeling. Not only she doesn't have the slightest idea of how to take care of Anna's cold because it's the first time she's had to deal with that kind of stuff on her own..."

"She's not on her own" Hans muttered bitterly, because it was true.

"But, well...this just...sucks. Anna's sick. It sucks"

"Will she be alright?" Hans asked as neutrally as he could, after a short pause.

"I told you already, it's just a cold-"

"No, not Anna" he turned to see Kristoff, expression severe "Elsa"

Kristoff's brow furrowed. Clearly, this wasn't the first time he'd asked himsef that. However, the gesture quickly changed into a playful smirk.

"For someone who doesn't care, you seem incredibly interested, Sideburns"

Hans rolled his eyes. He knew he should have guessed his questions would probably sound suspicious to anyone, but hell, the woman had done so much for him, so yeah, he did care, what was so weird about that?

"If it leaves you any less worried" Kristoff continued, not waiting for a reply "I'm sure when Anna gets better Elsa will be back to normal...or as normal as someone who magically summons ice can be"

"How can you be so sure?" Hans asked.

"Well, because...she's Elsa. She's...she's really strong, Sideburns. Amazingly strong, more than she realizes, anyway. She can do this, I'm sure"

"But..."

"What?"

'Here's the thing with this...this illness Elsa has. She will seem to be OK, she will swallow her feelings and discard them as if they were unimportant and they will pile up inside of her. She will bear with it silently, and put on a strong face, and seem OK. And then, suddenly she won't be OK, because she never was to begin with'

"Hans, what is it?" Kristoff pressed on, this time worriedly and Hans did open his mouth to reply truthfully, he really did, but...

...but saying how much he knew would probably raise questions on why exactly he claimed to know what he was seeing. And he wasn't willing to explain that to anyone, let alone Kristoff. He swallowed the sudden knot of his throat.

"Nothing, you're right" he finally finished, putting down the soapy rag to lean on the wall cockily "So..." he caught a glimpse of of Kristoff rolling his eyes, surely guessing what he was about to ask "Trolls, huh?"

On later times, Hans would ask himself how he managed to bear those days, days of all but bitting his tongue to stop the words from leaving his mouth when she was around. It wasn't like he wanted to say anything big, just a few words, maybe encouraging, maybe just akcnowledging he knew something was up. Anything. The woman had dared peek among the cracks of his broken person, pried inside him, planted the seed of ideas he had never thought of before. The less he deserved- the less she deserved- was for the tables to turn at least once, dammit!

And yet, he bit back the words, and maybe it was because it would require quite the effort and he wasn't feeling strong enough, or maybe it was because he didn't want to try her patience on a moment of tension such as this. But he had the nagging feeling that he just didn't want her to realize that he was keeping an eye on her, that he cared and he understood, because her reaction to that was something he couldn't fathom.

Then, one day, it happened.

At first Hans thought he was seeing things, there was no way Anna were standing on the entrance of the stables because a)She was supposed to be bedridden, according to Kristoff b) Chances that she'd step in the one place where she was sure to cross roads with him were slim at most c)Unlikely as it were that she'd decided to have a ride, there was no need to go get the horse herself, tasks like that were what stable-hands were being paid for d)She appeared to be wearing nothing but her sleeping gown. And yet, there she was, leaning against the doorframe, face glistening with a coat of sweat, chest heaving with her wheezy breathing and, yes, wearing only her sleeping gown. A vague thought of himself, in a very similar position not so long ago crossed his mind and suddenly he was full-aware of how incredibly ugly the sight of someone not giving a damn about themselves actually was.

She raised her eyes, seemingly having problems to focus them on anything, and then suddenly fixed them on him, gasping slightly. He froze, unsure of what to do. The most intelligent option seemed to back away slowly and hope someone, anyone else would show up and take her back to her room before she got herself hurt. However, she soon made a hoarse, sharp noise and he realized she was sobbing, the tears she'd been holding back flowing down her cheeks.

"She's done it again!" she mumbled in a strangled, throaty voice, staggering forward, and out of pure instinct, Hans lunged towards her and caught her to stop her fall, so quickly he didn't even register moving at all.

'Funny, though. Wasn't that how the whole thing began? Anna being a ditz and me play-pretending to be the hero I'm not?' his mind venomously whispered 'I could lie to myself all day long and say I knew who she was from the moment Sitron hit her, but that's not true. At that moment, at that first moment, before she introduced herself, all I saw was this clumsy, cute young lady who Sitron all but ran into. So the least I could do was make sure she weren't hurt...'

He gritted his teeth, scowling. Why was it that he always found himself instinctively doing things that, given the time to think, he wouldn't? Because he knew what his brothers would have done in his place. Rode away, ignore the knock on the horse's backside, ignore the upcoming splash in the water. Him? He just had to dismount and apologize and make a fool out of himself. Sure, it had paid off at large -until everything went to hell, that is- but fact remained that he always did unnecesary, stupid stuff that more often than not served no purpose whatsoever, so why bother in the first place?

One of Anna's hands traveled over his chest. The contact was so familiar, the whole scene was like a badly planned reprise of the moment when she'd come back from Elsa's ice castle, shivering and weak and cold. Except this time, instead of hanging from his neck and demanding a kiss, she was crying and pinning her fingers to his vest. Oh, and burning up instead of freezing.

"She's gone and done it again...!" Anna forced out, tugging at his clothes. He found himself most unnervingly unsure of how to respond and she continued "She promised...she promised no more closed doors...!"

"What the-?!" out of nowhere, Kristoff all but pushed Hans aside to scoop Anna into his arms, brown eyes wide with alarm "Anna, what are you doing here? You were supposed to stay in bed!"

"She's shut me out again..." came her groggy, oh so weak-voiced answer. Hans's stomach leaped in alarm as it dawned on him he knew what Anna was talking about because...

'She just...shut me out and...and I never knew why'

'I would never shut you out'

"What?" Kristoff stammered, confused "Who-?"

"Elsa" Hans replied, breathless.

Kristoff turned to see him, eyes squinting in confusion, Anna pressed to his chest as though she would fly away if he didn't, her sobs muffled against his neck.

"She's locked herself in again"

'Breath in. Control it. Breathe out'

Her own pulse was loud and quick in her ears, drumming against her temples, making her dizzy. She forced herself to take another deep breath, observing the frozen surroundings of her room out of the corner of her eye before breathing out. She'd learned, years before the great thaw incident, that deep breaths usually helped when she was like this. Except, this time it wasn't working at all.

'This isn't right'

The breath hitched in her throat and she lost the even rythm she'd held until then for a couple of seconds, all but panting for breath, feeling like she might suffocate, a sickening ache building up behind her eyes and around her head.

'Keep breathing. Don't think about it. Just breathe'

She let all the air out and then steadily drew in as much as she could, trying to overcome the feeling that her chest just wouldn't expand. Above her, icicles were forming, hanging like fangs inside the jaws of a huge beast.

'No, no, no, stop, why won't it stop?!'

She hear the soft cracking of more ice climbing on the walls, drawing looming, menacing figures around her. She half-sobbed the air out, frustrated. She'd thought that, after everything she'd gone through, after telling Anna and the whole kingdom the truth, she wouldn't have to deal with this kind of thing again, that she had finally gotten the hang of it. And yet, there they were.

'I knew it, I was never really getting better, it was all a pretty lie to keep everyone happy'

She shut her eyes, clenched hands coming up to tangle in her hair and run down her face, barely avoiding scratching her own skin. An overwhelming wave of nausea had her gasping for breath for what seemed ages.

'Stop. Thinking about this isn't doing any good. Breathe...'

She let out the air she didn't know she'd been holding, hands pressed against her temples, fingers curled up into her hair and forced herself to take another deep breath.

'Stupid, stupid. Did you really think you could control this? You're not strong enough, you'll never be. This will just keep on happening until one day you really do kill someone-'

She had to let the air out because the weight upon her chest had gotten ridiculously worse and made the anguished noise of a drowning woman when drawing in her next breath.

'Make it stop, oh, please, make it stop, make it stop, why won't it STOP?'

When the air escaped her mouth again she all but gave up on trying to control her breathing, giving in to the maddening rate of her heartbeat, the sensation that the room around her was spinning and her insides were turning and the inside of her head was both boiling and freezing over at the same time and her hands and feet where miles away from her and her head felt like a kite gaining altitude in the wind and everything but the sick feeling in her whole body just wasn't real enough-

'Oh, God, I can't breathe...'

'...but what does it matter...?'

There was a constant, far-away noise. It took her a moment to realize it was the sound of someone knocking on her door.

'Monster. Sorceress' she distantly thought, feeling as though whatever happened didn't have anything to do with her 'They're coming to get you already, they know what's going on in here, they always knew you couldn't handle it, you pitiful monster in a Queen's disguise' another idea came afloat, violently tugging her back into reality 'Oh, God, it's Anna, if she comes near me right now I might hurt her again. No, no, please, stay away, whatever you do, stay away-'

She heard something breaking and confusedly wondered whether that was the sound of her own person finally snapping. And suddenly there was another person in the midst of her personal snowstorm, covering their eyes from the snow, leaning forward against the wind to advance, coming for her.

'No, no, who are you? Stay away, whatever you do, just stay away, oh, God they're coming near me, no, no, no, please don't-'

'Don't come near me!' she wasn't sure whether she'd screamed it at the top of her lungs or just thought it. Everything was a white and gray haze, the sound of the storm drowning up everything else. Bewilderment so deep it erased everything else flooded her. Was she having a dream, or a nightmare? Why couldn't she feel her hands? Why was everything spinning so much...?

"Elsa, look at me, come on, it's me!" came a distant male voice, a galaxy away, in another lifetime. She slowly raised her eyes to stare at the man, brow furrowed and then, finally, everything fell back into place and Elsa recognized him and everything slowed down a bit, the beating in her ears, the words in her mind, the wind and the snow around them. She took in the freckly face, the patches of reddish hair on the sides of her face and the distinguished shape of the chin.

"...Hans..." she managed between ragged breaths, of course it was him. His hands were raised, showing her both palms, motioning at her for calm, alert eyes on her despite squinting against the wind, brow furrowed in concetration, lips and nose reddish with he icy wind, extremities covered in snow.

"You need to breathe" he called over the wind, his tone tinged with waryness, the cloud of his breath immediately whisked away.

"Hans, you have to get out of here" she forced out between frantic breaths that never quite filled her lungs, the nausea still crawled in her stomach liek an animal eating her up from inside, her body shivering incontrolably as she half-turned her back on him, trying to hide her damp eyes and pale face. She wasn't cold, she'd never been cold in her lfie, but her body seemed posessed by an exterior influence that didn't allow her to stop trembling "I can't...right now I can't..." A shudder, so violent she had to stop for a moment and hug herself, ran down her spine "You need to leave"

'I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to hurt anyone. Please, please, I just want to live without hurting others...'

"I can't do that"

She looked at him again, he was advancing again and she wanted to tell him, order him, beg him, please, not to, but she could swear if she tried to speak she would end up throwing up, so she pursed her mouth shut, averted her eyes in panic and tried, hopelessly, to not feel.

"Look at me" he called softly, and then louder when she ignored him "Elsa, look at me" he breathed out "Dammit, just look at me!" out of nowhere a hand grabbed one of hers and she started squirming away, letting out a series of panicked, high-pitched cries. He immediately released her "Alright, I get, it! I won't touch you, just-!" he swore under his breath and continued, clamer "Just look at me! Elsa. Look at me"

She fought the haze of panic just enough to pin her eyes on him and what she was made her weightless head land over her shoulders immediately, because she was expecting a mad Hans, an annoyed Hans or even a sneering Hans.

Instead, what she got was a wide-eyed, visibly worried Hans.

And he was so close, she could faintly smell the hay and see the auburn-colored splatters in his green eyes. She started to move away, but he backed off immediately.

"Easy" he said, gently, almost a purr, hands making calming motions again "Elsa, just breathe in. Breathe..." he exemplified it by taking a deep breath himself and, without realizing it, Elsa did so too. He let the air out slowly, a white, ghostly cloud escaping from between his lips steadily.

'If I let the air out I won't be able to breathe in again-'

"Keep breathing" he instructed, noticing her reluctancy "You can do this"

'What if I can't?!' she mentally retorted, noticing he was cringing slightly. Her eyes darted down, a small whimper escaping her lips as she noticed there was ice growing over his boots and legs, as well as his arms and torso. She wrung her hands 'Why can't I stop?!'

"Don't" he demanded, cutting the voice in her head short, firmly but not unkindly. Her eyes darted back at him, uncertain. When did he become this patient, she wondered? "Don't look down, look at me. I'm right here, Elsa"

'Yes, but why?'

"Don't think about it" he continued, as if guessing what ran through her mind, the snowflakes got caught in his eyelashes and he blinked furiously to shake them away "Stay with me. Keep breathing. Steady" she realized she'd been keeping a pace again, the tiniest hint of relief relaxing the tense line of her raised shoulders "That's it, you're doing great, keep it up"

So she breathed. Again. And again, for what seemed hours, until the pain behind her eyes and numbness of her members started to dissolve, as well as the haze in her head. The colors regained an almost aggresive sharpness, as well as the sounds of the Kingdom outside her window and whisperings on the hallway behind her busted door (Oh, so that was the breaking sound), her head spinned slightly, she felt the hair sticking to her head with sweat, her mouth felt dry as parchment, her legs wavered, throwing her forward.

He noticed, and before Elsa could even register what was going on, there was already an arm surrounding her waist to support her, and his collarbone had met her cheek. He was leaning forward slightly, muttering gentle words close to her ear.

'He's talking to me like I'm one of his horses' she thought somehow bitterly. She would have been indignated, hadn't the thought that she'd been acting more or less like a scared animal ocurred to her. The next thought was as disconcerting as it was sudden 'His hands are huge' and yes, she could feel both the base of his palm and the tips of his fingers on her side as he held her and tell there was a fair distance between them. And they were so warm. It was at the same time incredibly uncomfortable and very soothing. She was torn between breaking away and holding on to him like she would to anything at her grasp, were she in the middle of the water, drowning. And then she caught what he was saying.

"...you are not alone, Elsa..."

So she held on to him, tears falling from her eyes, a fierce cry leaving her lips, because she had been drowning.

"I made Anna sick" came Elsa's muffled voice from the bed,

Hans looked up from his position, sitting near the door, brow furrowed in confusion. After Elsa could finally stop crying -a much needed release he witnessed in silence, supporting her weight so she didn't tip over- he'd lead her to the bed, made her sit down and put the thick, surprisingly fluffy quilt over her shoulders and head like a cloak. Although visibly confused at first, Elsa had melted into the comfort of it and ended up curling up on her side, knees moving towards her chest as he wrapped around her until only her closed eyes could be seen under it and then he retired to the chair by the door, giving her some much needed space.

'Way to go Hans' he had frustratedly chatized himself. He'd done it again, gone and done things without thinking. What the hell was wrong with him? All it took was understanding what Anna was saying and before he knew it he was rushing through the halls like an idiot, ready to play hero again. What for? Why?

By then, as the in-room-temperature had started to normalize and the ice to recede, Kristoff, Kai and Gerda had finally brought themselves to peek inside the room.

"She's alright" Hans had whispered with a bitter half-smirk "She just needs some calm right now...and a glass of water. Perhaps some sweet she's specially fond of too"

Both Kai and Gerda had eyed each other, unsure, but Kristoff had nodded at them reassuringly so they had bowed and left. And just as Kristoff was turning to leave too, Hans had stopped him with a question.

"How's Anna?"

"She's alright" Kristoff whispered, a relieved smile coming to his lips as he turned to him again "Almost scared me to death with her little escapade, but it apparently didn't do her any harm. She's sleeping now"

"That's good to hear" Hans had replied, catching a slight movement on the quilt-covered figure inside the room out of the corner of his eye.

"...I'm an idiot" Kristoff had ruefully added, still in a whisper.

"Not that I disagree" Hans unkindly smirked "But why do you say so?"

"I should have...I should have done something!" he had frustratedly continued "I'm like...her brother-in-law or something, for Pete's sake! I should have known-!"

"Like you said, she's very strong" Hans found himself saying. Oh, great, now he was comforting the oaf, just when had he become one for such trivialities? "It's just that, sometimes we forget this doesn't mean she's not human"

Kristoff looked at him, as if re-evaluating him, before breathing out and running a hand through his hair.

"Yeah, well, I'm just...I'm just glad you were here to help her"

Hans had felt his insides turn at those words. Not exactly unpleasantly, but not nicely either.

"Yeah, well, I owe her, I suppose" he had mumbled embarrassedly. Kristoff had patted his back -so forcefully that Hans had staggered forward on the chair- before running back to Anna's bedside, leaving him to his thoughts. As soon as he was sure no one was watching, he had let his head fall to his hands, pinching bridge of his nose, scowling lightly.

'OK. It's official. I have absolutely no idea of what I am doing anymore'

Whatever had happened to 'Just drifting on the current'? When had stopped not giving a damn about anything but himself? Not only that, hadn't he comfortably settled down on a completely indiferent approach to life itself, interrupted every now and then by the guilty pleasure of getting on other people's nerves? Then, why on earth was he suddenly allowing himself the weakness, the pathetic indulgence of worrying about anyone else? These people who'd been his downfall, no less! He scoffed at himself, just what kind of an idiot did that?

'Maybe Elsa's ridiculous idea of 'Fixing me up' wasn't that ridiculous, after all' a mild voice in the back of his head suggested. He shook his head, discarding the idea immediately 'Oh, when has anyone thinking good things about me turned out right? Maybe I did some pretty decent things in my past, maybe I am doing not to shabby right now, but I'd have to be positively crazy to even think that makes me less of a...a villian, than I was two months ago!'

'Well, then, what is going on here?'

And that's where he'd been stuck into, until her words took him by surprise. He remained silent for a few minutes, mouth pursed, brow furrowed.

"I said, I made Anna-" came Elsa's muffled voice again.

"You're wrong" he deadpanned. Her eyes pinned on him with confusion and shock for a few seconds.

"I beg your pardon?"

"There's been a flu going around town for a few weeks now" Hans continued, in the tone of someone who is just stating the facts "The weather's been getting colder and damper. People who don't leave home often tend to have weaker inmune systems, and there is also the fact that there is a furry reindeer in the castle now and animal hair has been known to cause all sorts of respiratory problem"

"Anna hadn't been in bed with a cold for years" Elsa remarked, hugging her knees tighter under the quilt "She starts spending more time with me and immediately gets sick? It's obvious, really"

"Or she spent an afternoon splashing on the puddles around the castle, who knows?"

"That does sound like her" she conceded, her voice conveying a weak smile. He felt one spreading over his lips too. As much as Anna annoyed him, she had quite the amusing traits.

"She's a wild one"

"Perhaps too much for her own good" Elsa sighed "What was that 'Little escapade' Kristoff spoke of?"

"It was how we found out what was going on in the first place...she must have wanted to sneak into your room to spend some time with you, but when she discovered the door was closed, she..."

'She said you froze her heart!'

He cleared his throat and continued.

"She ended up wondering right into the stables"

"What?!" Elsa cried, sitting up on the bed, the quilt falling around her shoulders like a shed cocoon.

"You heard Kristoff, she's alright" Hans quickly added, simultaneasouly cringing at the fact that he was actually trying not to make Elsa feel worse, even if it was just to convince himself that he wasn't the same person of his flashbacks.

"She's not supposed to expose herself to the low temperatures!" Elsa cried, wringing her hands and everything fell into place in Hans's head, momentarily erasing his musings on his own behaviour "She will catch her death-!"

"That's why you locked yourself in again" he said. She pursed her mouth shut, looking at him in what could have well been fright "You've been icing things for the past days and you didn't want it to make Anna get worse"

A short silence, during which her scrutinizing made him realize he'd just gone and babbled out what he'd been trying to keep in for days. But if Elsa had caught the implication of his words, she didn't show. Instead, she took a deep breath before starting to speak, in the tone of someone who fears they are going to say something worth reproaching.

"I have...I have been having trouble controling my powers again" she admitted, eyes downcast and on her hands "Nothing too big...well, until today, that is" she looked at him, as if justifying herself "A-at first I thought it was nothing serious, I mean, it always happens when I'm upset and-"

"And frankly, you've been feeling like trash lately" he completed before he could think what he was saying. She looked at him, this time openly surprised. He looked away, mildly uncomfortable at having revealed -yet again- just how easily he could read her.

"Yes" she finally breathed out. He nodded comprehensively, so she cleared her throat and continued "I though maybe I just needed some alone time to figure it out, and keeping my cold away from Anna couldn't hurt, so..." she shrugged listlessly, adding, in a visibly darker mood "I did figure she'd wonder why I wasn't visiting her more often, what I didn't foresee was that she'd get so impatient she'd come looking for me and discover I'd locked the door again..."

"You couldn't have known" Hans found himself saying, and he had to physycally restrain himself from sighing in resignation, utterly convinced that he was being a fool "Either way, what's past is past, there's no use in moping about it"

"I guess you're right" Elsa said with a sigh, wrapping herself on the quilt and laying down on her side again "I will have to apologize, though"

"That would be wise, yes"

There was a short silence before Hans burst out.

"And how are you feeling now?"

"How am I feeling?" Elsa repeated, confused, as if the question hadn't even crossed her mind until he made it, before replying "I feel...I don't know. A little better I guess. Unleashing a snowstorm, even if it's just in my room, is... very liberating" she chuckled awkwardly "Not that I think it's an acceptable luxury, doing this every now and then, but-"

"And why not?"

This time, she peeked at him from under the quilt, one eyebrow cocked.

"Please tell me you are joking"

"Actually, yes" Hans admited with a low chuckle "But I do mean it, if you need to freeze some stuff to blow some steam off every now and then..."

"No, Hans- I could hurt someone! We're both lucky I didn't hurt you today" her eyes were damp as if the thought of hurting anyone at all were unbearable.

"Are you always this concerned about other people's well-being rather than your own?" he challenged with a smirk.

She pursed her lips, averting her eyes nervously. It occured to Hans how unlikely the present situation actually was; Elsa was really comunicating with him, instead of saying pretty things he seemed to need hearing, and he was saying things she needed hearing without having to lie to her.

"...were you really worried about me back then?" he inquired in a voice barely above a mutter. She huffed and sat up again, scowling at him.

"Hans, really. Must we have that conversation again? I do" he seemed taken aback by how easily the words had come out fo her mouth, and added, in a softer tone "I do"

"Well, then let's get something straight" he retorted, still mumbling, and he raised his eyes to pin them in her with something close to reproach and she glanced at him in shock "This thing you're trying to do with me, it's supposed to work both ways, I hope you know that. You've made me involve myself with you people, and now that I'm involved, I can't just...I can't just look at Anna not giving a damn about her well-being, or you shutting everyone out again" the shock in her eyes grew "Look, all I'm saying is, if you say I'm one of you, then at least admit you are one of us too! And that, like it or not, we are going to be looking out for you"

She looked at him, but he couldn't, wouldn't read her expression, his eyes set on the drawings of the wallpaper. But then he felt it, a slight shift in the air, the kind of thing one would feel when a ray of sunshine shines inside an otherwise dark and cold room. He ventured to look at her again and found her smiling; a radiant, pure smile he had never seen aimed towards him. His fingers tingled with what seemed an electrical wave and his stomach gave a jolt.

'Oh, no' a thought in the back of his mind chanted. He pushed it back, refusing to aknowledge what he'd just realized.

He cleared his throat, suddenly noticing he had been staring again and hoping she made nothing of it.

"I should go back to work" he managed as he took a step back despite the fact that his throat felt suddenly dry "I was in the middle of something when I rushed up here so-" damn, he hadn't intended to say that. The memory of himself, running like a madman along the halls, closely followed by a unbelieving Kristoff with Anna in is arms was embarrasedly fresh in his mind. No one had expected that reaction from him upon learning Elsa's situation. Not even him.

'Stupid little Hansy' he chided himself with words his brothers had often told him and cleared his throat again.

"I must go" he bowed and turned his back on her. Ah, yes, that was him. That was the indifferent, definitely-not-swayed-at-all Hans...

"Hans" she called behind him, he froze in place, hoping his cringing hadn't been too obvious "I...Thank you"

His stomach felt as though someone had decided to put a small, hyperactive animal in it.

"Right, yes, anytime" he hurriedly replied, aware of the fact that he needed to get out of there before anything else happened, But on his hurry, he tripped with the remains of her door and almost fell, and then realized what he'd just said "No, I mean, don't do anything like this anytime soon, but if you do-" he grimaced, thankful that his current position didn't allow her to realize his face was probably the same color as his hair "I must go"

Despite the fact that he was walking -a little faster than necessary, granted- he felt like he had just ran away after he arrived at the stables.

One or two days later, as they prepared Sven and Hans's mount for their afternoon ride, Kristoff amusedly commented on how Anna seemed to eb all better, save from a mild cough, but Elsa had woken up feeling slightly under the weather. Hans retorted that, with the time Elsa had been spending by Anna's bedside after what had happened, it was only natural she'd caught whatever her little sister had.

"But it's kind of funny" Kristoff continued, feeding Sven a carrot "Who knew the 'Snow Queen' of all people could catch a cold?"

"And I bet Anna's all to happy to be able to coddle her sister all day long, though" Hans said, adjusting the saddle on the horse's back.

"Totally. Let's just hope Elsa doesn't get impatient and escapes her room too" Kristoff chuckled, taking a bite of Sven's carrot and continuing between scrunches " 'specially not'n her p'jamas"

It didn't even surprise Hans anymore when he found himself thinking that was one sight he wouldn't dislike to behold.

"By the way, Sideburns, today Anna had a little something brought for you as thanks for 'Not-being-a-douche-for-once-in-your-douchey-life'- her words, not mine!"

"A little something? What?" Hans asked.

"I actually don't know myself" Kristoff admitted "I just know it'll arrive in a few days and that it's something she'd already though of doing before but, well..."

"She hates me" Hans completed

"No, it's- Look, she doesn't like you. At all. But she doesn't exactly hate you anymore, I'd call that a start, considering..." her trailed off, as if he'd suddenly realized what he was going to say wasn't appropiate.

"Considering I'm a jerk who almost got her dead, yes" Hans finished and turned to see him "I won't get offended if you rub that on my face, you know, it's true"

Kristoff fiddled with Sven's necklace for a moment before replying.

"You're also the guy who helped her sister when no one else knew how, Hans. And she will always remember that now"

As both of them mounted and rode to the exit of the stables, a question echoed through Hans's mind.

'Which one is the real one?'

C.C (a) the author here.

*LOUD CHEWBAKKA NOISES*

Guys, I'm so sorry this took so long, I had computer problems, and time problems, and health problems and just general problems. Hope it was worth the wait! I really wanted to have Kristoff and Hans become buddies -and some people were hoping for it to happen too- and though it's quite the awkward friendship right now, I'm hoping to make it grow from here on out, as well as the OTHER relationship featured in this chapter, huehuehue coughHELSAcough

I have the most horrible headache right now so I'll leave it at that. As usual, comments and critiques are welcome!