Summary: A/U. Kira is injured in taking the Jem'Hadar ship when Odo's disease could no longer be hidden.
Disclaimer: I own nothing of Star Trek Deep Space Nine.
Rating: T
Pairing: Odo/Kira
THE SECRETS THAT ARE KEPT:
Kira Nerys was on a Dominion ship with Garak, Damar, and Odo. She had taken a hit during their raid of this ship, during their fight to steal this ship. Odo was sick, his illness finally progressing to the point where he couldn't hide it. She had to hide her injuries long enough until they were back on Deep Space Nine. Kira knew she wouldn't be able to continue on after this. Sneaking off, Kira stole herself away into a compartment where she could change the bandage on her side. Jem'Hadar weapons were designed to keep someone from healing. Her wound, the blood, wasn't coagulating She just hoped they were going to be docking at the station sooner rather than later. Odo was sick, but if he found she was hiding her injuries from him he would use up his strength arguing with her. She was keeping quiet for Odo. He needed all of his remaining strength to keep in one form. Kira needed a few moments of quiet to tend to her wounds.
Kira pulled off the top of her uniform revealing the finely tailored blue tank top that resembled a Starfleet uniform. It was practically soaked through with her blood. With a barely contained yelp she pulled the tank top off to examine the phaser wound. She folded the tank top into a bandage and pressed it to her wound. Kira tried in vain not to cry out. She had endured worse when she had been a prisoner of the Cardassian's. With one hand, she kept the folded bandage to her side while she looked for some cloth to rip up and make another bandage. In the corner she saw what looked sheets and headed for it in the small store room. Kira covered the distance in a few short steps reaching out her bloody hand to grasp the cloth. It was a golden colored sheet. She removed a thin blade she had hidden in her boot and began cutting the cloth into strips. Kira had finished cutting the fourth strip when a slight knock sounded against the door. "Who is it?" She called out.
"It's Garak."
"What do you want?" Kira snapped and bit back a yelp when her fingers clenched in instinct. She dug her fingers into her wound on accident. That had the door sliding open and Garak came in without invitation. On some days she could count the Cardassian as a friend, but today was not that day. "Get out!" She hissed falling back against the bulkhead, the blood flowed a little faster. Kira bit her lip to keep it from quivering as she rode out the latest wave of agony.
"You need medical attention." Garak snapped seeing the bloody garment at the Colonel's side. All his fine work reduced to being used as a bandage. Even the cloth he had procured had been torn to shreds. Garak sighed going to her. He gathered up a few of the strips and folded them so he could use them against her wound. "Let me help you or I'll tell Odo." He threatened lightly. The Colonel was stubborn just like the Constable. They were perfect for each other.
"Fine," Kira growled pulling the blue tank top away from her side. To his credit, Garak didn't say anything to her as he touched the gold cloth to her wound, took her hand to hold it in place, and then gathered the rest of the strips up to bind the bandage to her skin to hold it in place. Kira tried not to watch as Garak wrapped the cloth around her abdomen. He had steady hands and he was meticulous. When he was finished he stepped back allowing her to pull the red undershirt on. The crimson uniform would hopefully hide most of the blood that had seeped through and the heavy black cloth of the jacket would do the rest. Kira pulled the zipper up, taking a breath, feeling her ribs expand and the bandage pressing into her wound. "Thank you, Garak."
"Colonel, you really need a doctor." Garak stressed after seeing the full extent of her wound. He had made sure to keep his touch light, yet also firm as he bound her wound with every scrap of medical knowledge he had gleaned from Julian over the years.
"Well, we conveniently forgot to pack one." Kira snapped making a move towards the door. "We'll be back on DS9 soon enough. Julian can take care of me then." She stopped and turned to Garak. "I know my limitations." Kira assured hoping that Garak wouldn't tell Odo that she was injured just as he had told her that Odo was gravely ill.
"Colonel…" Garak didn't want to be caught in the middle of Odo and Kira again. The first time was when he had seen the true extent of Odo's illness after the Colonel's temper tantrum. Odo had pressured him into not saying anything, but he hadn't been able to keep quiet.
"Garak, you tell him, and I'll break all the bones in your hand." Kira threatened knowing that Garak would take her threat seriously as she wouldn't hesitate to enforce it.
"He has to know you're hurt." Garak said trying to impress upon her the gravity of her true situation. She could fall to the floor and pass out from blood loss at any moment.
"No, he doesn't." Kira stressed. "If he knows then he'll worry about me, and if he's worrying about me he's expending energy he could be using to maintain his humanoid form and he could be fighting his illness. I'm keeping quiet for his benefit."
"He will figure this out, you know that," Garak replied coming closer to her. To anyone else she would appear strong, but to him, she was being foolish.
"I know," Kira sighed. "But for now, I'm giving him what he needs." Right now, Odo needed her to be strong, to be on point. She knew this and it was what she was doing. Kira Nerys knew how to be strong.
A FEW HOURS LATER:
Odo, from his spot on the deck, watched Nerys as she worked with Garak and Damar. There was something wrong with her. He could sense it, see it in the way she was moving. If the disease ravaging his body hadn't progressed in such a debilitating way he would be on his feet going to her. Odo watched the way she would clench her right hand; her subtle signal that she was in pain. Nerys had been injured and she was keeping silent about it. That was just like her from years of being in the resistance. One had to keep going. "Nerys…" Odo raised his voice as loud as he was able.
Kira had been on her feet for two hours making sure the systems aboard the Jem'Hadar warship were functioning after their taking of the ship. She had managed to set aside most of the pain in her side, but she knew she was still bleeding. Garak had informed her that they were eight hours out from the station. That gave her a moment to breathe a sigh of relief until Odo called to her. He had been watching her like a hawk since she had gotten back to the bridge after Garak had tended to her wound. He knew. Yet, Kira still went to him, and carefully sat on the deck next to him. "Are you ok?" She asked taking his left hand between both of hers.
"You're hurt." Odo made it a statement tightening his grip on her hand. She tensed beside him telling him all he needed to know. Nerys sighed angling her body to look at him. She bit her bottom lip as she did so. "When did this happen?" Odo asked as he tried to move to face her, but his body defied him. It was the virus ravaging his body; the virus section 31 infected him with to kill his people.
"When we took this ship," Nerys answered truthfully. She took his hand, moving it to her side where she knew he could feel the outline of the bandage Garak had helped her with. "I didn't want you to worry about me." She said cupping his face with her left hand. "You needed to rest."
"Nerys…" Odo stressed her name.
"Odo, I'm fine." Kira lied through her teeth. "We're almost back at DS9. I'll have Julian patch me up and…" This time it was she who let her words die with the look she was getting from the man she loved.
"You should have told me." Odo scolded gently knowing that he couldn't be truly angry with her. She was thinking of him, just as he had been thinking of her when he kept his illness from her.
"I could have," Nerys agreed, "But I didn't. The same way you chose to keep the true extent of your illness from me," Leaning in, she touched her forehead to his. Odo moved back a fraction which hurt Kira. He wasn't angry about her injury. He was angry at how he appeared; sickly. She wouldn't let him pull back from her. Nerys leaned in further and whispered, "I only see you, not this illness."
"How?" Odo muttered. "How can you still touch me when I look like this?" He asked carefully. Everyday Nerys was with him was a new day in wonderment for him. She loved him beyond all the reasons he could come up with. She loved him. "I'm dying, practically desiccating before your eyes, and still you're with me." Odo rested his forehead to hers this time and breathed out the breath he had been holding.
"I'm with you because I love you." Nerys said cupping Odo's face in both her hands, blood had soaked through the bandage and onto her right hand, now on his skin. "I'm never going to give up on you, not even when you're sick. I could never leave you."
"I know," Odo said. "I'm just…"
"Amazed that I love you?" Nerys asked lightly. There were times that Odo would look at her like he was dumbfounded that she was at his side, that she would take his hand, or a handful of other things they did.
"I'm thankful for every day you and I are together." Odo smiled as much as he was able.
"So am I," Nerys chuckled. It felt too god to be sitting with him, to be still. The more she remained stationary was more time she had to feel the true extent of her injury. Now she was feeling lightheaded. "I'm so tired now." Kira slurred sitting back against the same bulkhead that Odo was resting against.
Odo sat back and rested his hand on her thigh, "Sleep for a little while." He whispered knowing that he had enough strength to stay awake, to watch over her as she had done for him when he fell ill. Odo knew that he should be angry with her for keeping silent about her injuries, letting him watch her and figure it out, but he had done the same thing to her. She shook her head, fighting against the fatigue, but she gave in. Kira finally let her eyes close.
DEEP SPACE NINE:
Kira woke in the Infirmary knowing that only moments ago she had fallen asleep on the Jem'Hadar warship. Her eyes stung from the light making her hiss. "Odo…" She called out trying to sit up, but her side screamed in agony. Lying back down, Kira looked around better able to focus on her surroundings. Julian's face swam into view. "Where's Odo?" It was all she could ask.
"He's resting, Nerys." Julian smiled lightly to reassure the fiery Bajoran.
"I want to see him." Nerys tried sitting up again, but Julian pushed her back down into the bio-bed. If she wanted to push the issue then she would be up and off the bio-bed going in search of Odo.
"You will," Julian promised, "After I take care of this wound." She looked at him, the fight still lighting her dark brown eyes. "You need surgery." He stressed knowing how much Kira loved Odo. She wanted to be by his side more than she wanted to take care of herself.
Kira nodded reluctantly, "Before you work your medical magic, let me talk to Garak." If she was going to be out for the count, as Sisko would put it, then she would have to have another Bajoran take her place on Cardassia to organize a resistance. She couldn't leave Garak and Damar without someone who had experience.
"Alright, but you have five minutes." Julian agreed knowing he had no choice. "We can't let that wound remain untended for much longer."
Kira concentrated on breathing in and out; the pain in her side growing harder and harder to ignore. She could vaguely hear Julian relaying her message to Garak and then she heard him coming closer. Next she saw, the Cardassian was waiting for her to speak. "I won't be able to go with you to Cardassia." Every breath she took was harder and harder. "But, there is a Bajoran on this station who can help you."
"Colonel…" Garak started to say, but she gripped his wrist willing him to fall silent, and he did.
"Phaydra Morel," Kira coughed and then gasped. It took her a moment to struggle past the searing pain in her lungs. "She sometimes works at the bar, but she was with the Resistance. Find and tell I sent you. Morel will help you on Cardassia." Kira gasped again. The injury was sapping all of her control. "She's a honey trap, not a brawler like me. Moral is…."
"Ok, Colonel." Garak took Kira's hand off of his wrist. "We'll seek her out, but now, Julian must tend to you." At one time Garak had been the best spy on Cardassia, assassin on occasion, and then he fell from grace being relegated to the lowly job of tailor. Then something happened that he hadn't expected. He made a life on this station, made connections with people. Seeing the Colonel injured made a small part of him inside hurt for her. The still so young at heart Doctor swooped in to begin to perform a medical miracle to save the life of Colonel Kira Nerys.
Odo had no choice but to lie in the stasis chamber that Bashir had constructed or him to halt the cellular degradation. All he wanted was to be by Nerys's side when she woke up. Only, he was stuck conserving what strength he had until the young genius found a way to save him. It left his imagination to torture him with the fear that they hadn't gotten back to the station in time for Kira to receive medical attention. Odo had to go through that once. He didn't want to go through that again, but at the moment, he didn't have a choice.
Kira felt life breathing brought back into her. She was waking up with the sense that more time had passed after her small chat with Garak. Opening her eyes, the lights were dimmed in the Infirmary hinting that it was night on the station. Quickly, her hand went to her side, pressed in, and smiled when nothing hurt. Julian knew his medicine. Nerys sat up shaking her head, feeling her joints pop and crack from being in one position for too long. She wanted to see Odo, to take his hand, to let him know that she was fine. She knew he needed to know she was alive. Kira set her feet on the floor, pulling herself from the bio-bed to search out the man she loved.
Odo had closed his eyes, finally tired of staring at the drab infirmary ceiling when movement caught his attention. He tried to sit up as best as he could, but his body fought him. The illness was making him as weak and feeble as an old woman. Odo was definitely starting to feel his 100 years of age even though he had only been a man for thirty-six years. More movement caught his attention and when he opened his eyes, he saw Nerys standing by his side. "Nerys…." He breathed out.
"Hey," Kira breathed out shakily, tears springing to her eyes seeing him lying in the stasis chamber with the illness advancing in him. Before she fell to the ground, Kira grabbed for the chair and slid it next to Odo. She sat down and then reached out to him, placing her hand over his heart. "I'm ok," Kira whispered. "I wish I could lay with you." She whispered and smiled when he placed his hand over hers.
"So do I," Odo replied gently. More than anything he wanted her at his side, her head resting on his chest, her legs tangling with her, and more than anything he wanted to feel her breathing against him. Just having Kira's hand upon his chest helped to boost his confidence that the genetically enhanced Doctor would find him a cure. "You should be on Cardassia, finishing what we started." He said not wanting to talk about his illness or the fact she had concealed her injury from him. "I wouldn't want you to sit around…" Odo began to say.
"No," Nerys shook her head, "I'm staying right here." She made sure he could see the determination in her eyes. "I made sure they had another resistance fighter to accompany them." Kira said reassuring him. "I told them to find Phaydra. She'll get them farther than I ever could." Odo was about to protest, but she stopped him. "My focus would have been divided with you here, sick, and alone."
"Kira…" Odo drew out her name. "I will be fine." He stressed.
"But I wouldn't have." Nerys responded a bit too forcefully. "I refuse to say goodbye to you." She knew what he was doing. He was trying to push her away, to protect her.
"I don't want you to see me like this." Odo admitted. "You had to watch as Vedek Bariel died in this room." He knew how hard that had been for her. "I couldn't lay here knowing that you would have to do the same with me."
"Being here, giving my support, is my choice." Fire had returned to her voice. "You are the man I love and I will be nowhere else but by your side." Kira stated with passion. "This war, your people, and the Cadassian resistance means nothing to me as long as you're sick."
"Nerys…" Odo had nothing to say to that, no way of fighting her when she was saying everything he wanted to hear. He brought her hand up to his dry lips, pleased she didn't flinch at the way he looked, letting his dry lips touch her soft skin. "I don't want you to leave." He confessed.
"Then I'm not going to." Nery smiled at her lover. She leaned over and rested her heads on his chest. For her benefit, she knew, Odo was faking his breathing. He knew she feared death, feared the cold lifeless bodies that had been a part of her life. Odo wasn't going to let her fall asleep with him not breathing. "I love you." Nerys whispered, turning her head into him to place a kiss to his chest.
"Sleep now Nerys," Odo muttered feeling his body settle with her at his side. "Rest and regain your strength." He brought his hand up and cupped the back of her head gently. As Kira slipped deeper into sleep Odo made sure to keep his chest rising and falling for her. With her by his side he could stare up at the dismal infirmary bulkheads and wait for morning.