Izaya slept easily through the night and woke early enough to slip out of bed and make breakfast. At around two he decided they could pick up the twins.

The girls had obviously had fun at their friend's, but were also happy to see their brother and Shizuo too. Mairu giggled as she ran up to them.

Izaya gave them both a hug and a kiss, delighted to see them safe and sound and in high spirits, remembering to thank the other girls parents for having them over.

Two weeks later, and Shizuo was sure they'd always be together. Sure, it was possibly a bit early to decide that, but he was certain. The twins were sick that day, so Izaya stayed home.

When Shizuo arrived at school, he raised a hand in greeting to Shinra. "Hey."

"Hey, what's up?" Shinra asked. Very few knew about their relationship at this point but Shinra was one of them.

"Not much. I mean, the day just started Shinra." Shizuo shrugged as he walked beside the future doctor.

"Ah... yeah... no Izaya today huh? That's strange... you two are living together right?" Of course he knew that part but not the details as to why.

Shizuo nodded. "Yeah. We are. And his sisters are sick. Izaya stayed home to care for them. He's also able to miss a day and be fine."

"I suppose... so... how are things between you two anyway, they good?" Shinra was a little worried... he knew Izaya hated owing a debt badly and he'd asked Kasuka about it... apparently Shizuo's living allowance had been upped so he could support Izaya and the Orihara twins.

Shizuo nodded, a smile on his face. "Yeah. Everything's going fine and great."

"Shizuo... this might be awkward but are you sure he isn't just with you so he doesn't owe you?" Shinra fidgeted a little.

Shizuo blinked and frowned lightly. "Yeah... Why do you ask though?"

"Izaya... he hates owing people or feeling like he owes people... he'll give up anything just to get rid of that feeling..." Shinra sighed.

Shizuo's frown only deepened as he thought about it. "So you think he might be with me so that he has no debt?" But... Shizuo never considered that Izaya would owe him. He was letting him stay for free. But Shinra did just say he had to make it feel like he didn't owe a debt...

"It is quite possible... I know he'd give anything he could think of to clear it... so with no money all he can give is his body right?" Shinra didn't like telling Shizuo this; he was just concerned that the blonde would feel hurt later if Izaya left him.

Shizuo just nodded. "Yeah..." And that meant he was taking advantage of him too... "I'll... I'll deal with this when I get home. Come on Shinra. We should get to our classes."

Shinra nodded and followed Shizuo to class. Izaya wasn't with Shizuo though because he owed Shizuo everything -though he did feel he owed Shizuo everything he planned to return that by making the blonde as happy as he could make him and cook and clean and basically be a good housewife, he knew Shizuo never would have accepted sex as payment. Izaya was with Shizuo because Izaya loved Shizuo... He made soup for dinner, though it would be ready when Shizuo arrived home.

When Shizuo got home, he was frowning lightly. Since he and Izaya weren't in the same class, he didn't have the raven's work. And instead of greeting Izaya, he just headed to the table to work on his homework. He knew it'd be hard for him to do what he was going to do... but he didn't want to take advantage of Izaya or be with him just because of any debt or anything.

"Ah, welcome home Shizu-chan~" Izaya said when he saw the blonde, smiling at the other. The twins were on the couch in there pyjama's and sleeping soundly, curled up together.

"Yeah. Thanks." Shizuo could feel his heart twist a bit. He really didn't want to. He was happy. And Izaya seemed to be too...

"Soup for dinner, hope you don't mind... I thought it'd be best with the twins sick," He explained as he finished it up now.

Shizuo nodded slowly. "Yeah. It's fine." He was acting a bit distant. Izaya was sure to notice.

He did... it worried him but he got everything ready anyways, not sure he wanted to know what was on Shizuo's mind. He woke the twins when the soup was ready and poured them orange juice for vitamin C with it.

Shizuo ate dinner quietly. After the twins were asleep... that's when he had to. He was glad that the girls didn't pick up on something being wrong though.

Izaya put them to bed quietly, though he was starting to feel anxious. Something was wrong, Shizuo was not acting how he usually did and it frightened the ravenette.

When the twins were asleep and in their room, Shizuo plopped down onto the couch with a sigh. "Izaya... I have to... talk with you about something..." He didn't want to. He wanted to forget what Shinra had told him. Anything. But he couldn't. He just couldn't.

"Sure..." Izaya nodded and sat beside the other quietly, though he felt like something terrible was about to happen.

Shizuo was silent now. Silent for a few minutes as he stared at the ground. He felt like he might pass out, and he had only called Izaya over, not actually said anything yet.

"Izaya..." He still wasn't looking at the raven.

"Please say it..." Izaya curled up again, a nervous defence mechanism whenever he felt really unsure of things. "Please just get it out..."

Shizuo bit his lip. "We're... we're breaking up..." It was said quietly, a ghost of a whisper, but still loudly enough for Izaya to hear. Shizuo didn't look up from the floor when he said it, and he just wanted to curl up and die. He wanted to stay with Izaya. Stay with his raven. With the person he loved...

"Breaking... up...?" Izaya mumbled and his eyes widened slowly, "B...but why?"

Shizuo frowned, his eyes closing. "We just... can't be together anymore."

Izaya frowned softly... his assumption was that Shizuo didn't love him anymore... and that hurt. It was like a hole had been ripped into his chest and his heart taken right out...

"Alright... I'm going to bed then..." He mumbled, but he went into the room Mairu and Kururi slept in rather than Shizuo's.

Shizuo sighed sadly. He took that fine... at least it seemed that way. Frowning, Shizuo just made his way to his room before changing into night clothes and falling asleep, alone and sad.

Izaya didn't sleep very well that night. When he finally stopped the quiet crying it was because he had fallen asleep and then he suffered his worst nightmares yet because now when he reached out for help it was to Shizuo... and Shizuo would turn and walk away.

Shizuo wouldn't turn away from Izaya. But, to Izaya, it didn't seem like that. Shizuo didn't sleep that well that night either. No dreams, just uncomfortable.

Izaya got up very early and showered, managing to stop the flow of tears before anyone else was up and made a nice large breakfast for everyone. The twins had returned to their normal temperature now after all and Izaya planned to send them to school, they were heading to a friend's house tonight too so Izaya didn't have to worry about picking them up...

When Shizuo woke, he was surprised to see how Izaya was acting. He seemed fine to Shizuo. He frowned a bit as he sat down to eat. He doesn't look affected by this at all... He wandered if he'd still walk Mairu and Kururi to school with Izaya.

"I can take the twins this morning," Izaya said as they ate, he planned to skip today anyways so he could figure out what he was going to do.

"Alright then." Shizuo ate quietly now. It was going to be difficult for him.

Izaya was silent when they left, though he made sure to smile for his sister's sake and walked them to school. When there he told them he loved them both very much and that he was sorry, but he didn't tell them why he was sorry either. Then he went back home.

Shizuo was already at school when Izaya did get back. Shizuo was silent at school , preferring not to talk to anyone.

Izaya sighed and stared at the wall for a few hours, and then he wrote out a nice long letter. Three actually, one to Shizuo, one to Mairu and one to Kururi, though the two for his sisters was for when they were a little older. He even pleaded to Shizuo in the letter to him that he take care of them, like they were his own siblings or his children and apologised for leaving him with such a responsibility. Then he tried to figure out the how part... finally he found what he needed, though it took a while to disassemble a shaving razor.

Shizuo sighed as he walked home from school. Izaya never went... and he was worried. Sighing again, he unlocked the front door and walked in.

Izaya jumped when he heard the door open... and just as he'd managed to make the cut... too soon, too soon! Izaya remained quiet though, hoping Shizuo didn't come into the bathroom.

Shizuo sighed as he let his backpack drop to the side of the door. He didn't see Izaya, or hear any sign of him, so he guessed that he had left. Frowning, Shizuo plopped down on the couch. He'd stay there for a few minutes, and then head to the bathroom.

Izaya was quite pleased when Shizuo didn't come in, but he was hurt too in a way and he made another cut... this one was deeper though and the blood really poured... he was amazed by how much there was... he started to get a little dizzy now, smiling a bit. He hoped Shizuo didn't find the letters too soon, but they were on the coffee table so he knew Shizuo would see them.

Just as Izaya thought of the letters, Shizuo spied them. Reading the first one, his face turned pale. Izaya was... Panicking, Shizuo started to look around. He had to find Izaya. Fast. Finally, he threw open the bathroom door, and saw Izaya.

He'd already lost a lot of blood, enough that he couldn't stand because he was too dizzy. He looked up hazily at Shizuo but his eyes were dead too and his arm didn't stop bleeding either.

Shizuo's eyes widened, and immediately, he kneeled down to Izaya and knocked away the razor. He placed his hands on the cuts and put pressure on it, trying to stop the bleeding. He had to stop the bleeding. Izaya had to get through this.

"Get...away..." He mumbled weakly, trying to get the other teen to release him now, almost desperately.

Shizuo shook his head no. "I won't. I won't go away." His voice was quiet, but also watery, like he might cry. Even now, when he was there, trying to help, Izaya wanted him gone and to die. He didn't want that. Not at all.

"You already did! You don't want me, why?! Why sh-should I w-when you..." He was starting to struggle a little but he was weak too.

Shizuo forced Izaya to stay still now, still trying to stop the bleeding. "I... I do want you Izaya..." He bit his bottom lip. "I love you Izaya..."

Izaya didn't believe it. If Shizuo loved him why the hell would he have broken up with him? "Then why'd you leave me...?" he whimpered.

"Because... Because Shinra convinced me that it wasn't real. I shouldn't have believed him. I'm so sorry." Shizuo was close to crying now. Blinking his eyes rapidly so he wouldn't cry as he kept his hands over Izaya's cuts in an attempt to stop the bleeding. He hoped it was working.

It was starting to but not fast enough. Izaya's head dropped along with his eyes as he passed out cold from blood loss. Shizuo should really call an ambulance but Izaya couldn't tell him that now.

Shizuo panicked again. He grabbed the first aid kit and bandaged up Izaya's arm, clumsily before grabbing his cell and calling Shinra. It was the first thing that came to mind, and Shizuo didn't even bother to wipe Izaya's blood off his hands when he did.

Shinra picked up right away, "Hey Shizuo, what's up?"

"Get over here now and bring your medical things!" Shizuo hung up after that before focusing his attention on Izaya. It was bad to sleep, right? So he had to wake the raven up. But how?

Shinra was deeply confused and a little unsettled, but he called back as he grabbed his things together. If something was wrong an ambulance might be needed after all.

Shizuo glared at his ringing phone, but he answered it anyway. "What?" He had to get Izaya help...

"What happened, you have to give me more than just 'get your medical supplies ready'" Shinra huffed.

Okay. It was to help Izaya. "Izaya. He's bleeding a lot and..." It was obvious that he was panicking.

"Shizuo, call an ambulance! If he's bleeding he might need a transfusion! Call an ambulance, I'll come over anyways to help you but call one now" Shinra hung up at that.

Shizuo did that immediately. The thought that Izaya would need more blood after all that he had lost hadn't even crossed his mind in his panicked state. After giving the address, he hung up and tried to figure out how to wake Izaya up again.

He wouldn't manage it but the paramedics arrived fast and took over for Shizuo, getting Izaya loaded into the ambulance. Shinra arrived just after they left and hurried to find the blonde, "Shizuo what happened?"

Wordlessly, Shizuo just handed the notes he had found to Shinra. He didn't think he could exactly tell Shinra what had happened himself.

Shinra read them over though he paled slowly as he read the one to Shizuo and slowly, when he'd finished reading it he shook his head, "I didn't... I'm sorry... I was wrong,"

"Yeah you were wrong." Shizuo snapped at Shinra. After all, if he hadn't listened to the future doctor, this wouldn't have happened.

"I couldn't have known... and I never suggested you break up with him," Shinra pointed out, "You could have just asked him."

"I could have, but listening to you, I didn't think to." Shizuo snapped again. He was upset and angry and also fearful.

"It's okay; he'll be alright, okay? Let's get things cleaned up though so that his sisters don't have to see that..."

Shizuo sighed and nodded. "Yeah."

Shinra shuddered a little when he saw just how much blood there was to clean up but he worked at it anyways. He didn't want to worry Shizuo by telling him Izaya may have lost too much.

It was good Shinra didn't either, because if he did, Shizuo would run to the hospital and force the doctors to make sure he would be okay.

Not that that behaviour would help. If anything Shizuo would make things worse by distracting the doctors. Izaya didn't need much, stitches and a blood transfusion, two units, but they admitted him too for observation. They were also concerned about his mental health status. Once everything was cleaned up Shinra suggested going to the hospital to see how Izaya was doing.

Shizuo agreed immediately. He needed to see Izaya and apologize. Even if he already did.

Shinra walked with him and at the desk the woman told them the room number for Izaya.

The room Shizuo headed for without Shinra, though the teen was most likely walking behind him. The walk to the room was quick, and Shizuo inhaled before entering.

Izaya was awake, though the blood was still being transfused and an IV was set up into his uninjured arm, the other one bandaged from wrist to elbow.

Shizuo frowned, but went over to sit by Izaya. He didn't say anything, instead waiting for the raven to speak first.

Izaya wasn't sure what to say though... "Hi..." he mumbled after a minute of silence.

"Hi..." If Shinra was in the room, it was probably awkward for him. "How are you doing?"

"They're keeping me for at least a week..." Izaya mumbled, averting his gaze. He had just tried to kill himself after all.

"At least it isn't longer." Shizuo hoped Shinra wasn't in the room. "...Do you want me to bring your sisters by tomorrow?"

Shinra had let Shizuo go up alone though. "I dunno... I don't know if I want to let them see me like this..." Izaya mumbled, his eyes watering.

"What should I tell them if they ask then?"

Izaya shook his head, "Bring them I guess... don't want them to worry that I won't come back..." He sighed and scratched at the bandage on his arm. It itched...

Shizuo gently placed his hand on Izaya's to stop him. "Don't. Won't scratching make it worse?"

"Can't help it itches..." He mumbled, frowning a little.

Shizuo frowned lightly. "I'm sorry Izaya. If I hadn't listened to Shinra and stayed with you like I wanted..."

"Shinra huh... because I owe you..." It made sense really, Izaya didn't blame Shinra for it either, and he knew that the teen had just been looking out for his friend.

"I'm sorry." Shizuo glanced down now. He really was. He wouldn't have broken up had he known. Now, Shizuo just felt guilty... and wasn't quite sure Izaya wanted him anymore.

"Shizu-chan... it's not...its okay... I'm sorry... I shouldn't have done something stupid so... st-stop blaming yourself..."

Shizuo shook his head. "You had every reason to... and what you did was a direct action of something I did." His voice was quiet as he spoke.

"Then if I forgive you will you stop looking sad?" Izaya mumbled, his bandaged arm reaching out to take Shizuo's hand.

Shizuo was silent for a moment before nodding. "Yeah... but only if you mean it... and aren't just saying it so I blame myself."

"I do mean it... if... if you do love me... because I was never with you because I owe you, that I'll pay back some other way... some how... I love you Shizu-chan..."

Shizuo smiled, happy, before kissing Izaya's forehead. "I love you Izaya. I really do."

Izaya smiled at that, "Promise...?" He didn't want Shizuo to say that because he wanted to keep Izaya alive.

Shizuo nodded. "Yeah. I promise." Shizuo smiled again, happy. He was happy. It seemed like Izaya still wanted to be with him.

"You better not be saying that so that I don't try to kill myself again..." Izaya mumbled softly.

"I promise, I'm not. I loved you before that. I loved you when... when I broke up with you, and I love you now."

"Good..." Izaya gave Shizuo's hand a light squeeze.

Shizuo lightly squeezed Izaya's hand back. "Now, we just have to wait a week for you to get home."

"They might let me go sooner... they want to start me on drugs... and therapy..." He knew he probably needed it but if he saw a real therapist he'd have to tell them what happened to him... and he wasn't sure he could.

Shizuo pulled Izaya to hug, careful of the IV. "If they make you, I'll be there. Alright?"

"I know... I don't... I don't want them though... I feel fine now... and if I had a therapist I'd have to tell them everything... and then the police would be there and I just... I just want to forget everything..."

Shizuo hugged Izaya a bit tighter. "You don't have to go to a therapist. I don't think they can force you."

"All they need is parental consent... not of age yet... Shizu-chan I lied... I gave them your phone number for my parents... I don't want them to call them, I can't..." Izaya was almost panicking now.

"You gave them my number? But it's obvious that I'm not your parent. How am I gonna fool them so you don't have to go?"

"I dunno... I wasn't... I wasn't thinking I was scared, I am scared; what if we have to go back?" He whined now, looking properly distraught.

"If they found out... you wouldn't go back. But you would go to an orphanage or foster home..."

"I don't want that either! I want... I want to stay with you..."

"I want you to stay too. So, let's think of something, alright?"

Izaya nodded and thought quietly. A doctor came in a few minutes later to remove the IV and declare him physically fit though it was only a matter of time now that a mental health doctor would come in.

"Izaya... should I leave or stay?" Shizuo didn't know what'd be best.

"Stay..." He said, he was going to ask to be discharged anyways, he knew that they couldn't help him here like Shizuo could.

Shizuo nodded. "Alright. I will."