A.N: Holy shit I'm late. I've been meaning to crank this chapter out for ages, I deeply apologize. For real though, I'm really happy to see that I'm getting more views than I used to be, especially with my later chapters. To think this is only the beginning is staggering. Anyways, as usual, enjoy the chapter, and thank you for your continued support.

Chapter Fourteen – Seto and Cecelia's Lament

Startled awake from her rest after her bittersweet recollection in her dream, Cecelia immediately shot upwards in bed, feeling a sharp jolt of pain. She shifted slightly to sit up in place and leaned her head up against the head of the bed, placing a hand to her forehead groggily. Clearing her eyes gently to avoid messing up her makeup, now smudged and agitated from her pillow, she scanned the room, confused as to why she was in bed and how it could have been the middle of the night. She found Seto sleeping beside her, nearly jolted again and shifted slightly to keep some space and avoid breaking boundaries. Exhausted for some reason, she closed her eyes tiredly and remained quiet as she tried to remember what had happened during the day. She couldn't remember anything, and grew puzzled and anxious.

Already uncomfortable after five minutes of being still, she moved carefully to readjust, causing Seto to stir in his sleep and open his eyes calmly. He looked up, to see Cecelia sitting against the head of the bed in what looked to be a disturbed demeanor and shifted to face her.
"Oh, you're awake." He told her haphazardly. Quickly opening her eyes to look down at him with a frown, she sighed.

"Likewise. I'm sorry if I woke you…" she answered, still troubled. "…Is it strange that I don't remember anything from today?"

Seto blinked silently for a moment, estranged.

"Well, uh," he began hesitantly, not entirely sure what happened to her himself "You seemed to be fighting something off while I was confronting Yugi as we had planned…and then you passed out." He shifted slightly to get comfortable again, propping his head up with an arm on the pillow he had managed to grab from Cecelia's mess of blankets and covers. "It didn't seem pleasant…I tried waking you afterwards too, but I got nothing." He changed his neutral expression to a half-hearted smile "At least you've come to now and that's what matters." He glanced off, blushing slightly as he grew more conscious of the fact that the two of them were sharing a bed and that it was more of a couple's nature to do so. "I hope it's alright that I took to your bed instead of the sofa…It was a bit small for me to get comfortable…" he immediately tried to reconcile, and had managed to get a short chuckle out of her.

"It's alright," she replied, blushing a little as she personally enjoyed sharing the bed with Seto secretly. "I guess I misjudged how tall you were." She joked slightly, then glanced upwards towards the tall windows that graced her room with bright rays of moonlight, creating a beam that shot from her desk to the bed sharply. She drooped her short smile back to a grimace. "So then, I'm guessing now that you're in the clear for being here, I'm guessing you plan to confront my father tomorrow since you're in the position to?"

"Yeah." He answered affirmatively. "What about you? I imagine you probably have your own set of things to resolve."

Cecelia nodded, closing her eyes again out of fatigue and let out a depressed sigh.

"There is this strange tournament that Father is hosting at the moment, and he wanted me to play in it against the finalists that manage to qualify…" she groaned, frustrated that she couldn't put the pieces together herself. "It's weird enough that he's using our home as the tournament grounds, as well as the fact that he has never allowed me to take up his game seriously, but it's as if he wants something to do with that Yugi guy." She fisted some of the blankets irritably. "On top of that, I found your younger brother in our dungeon earlier for some reason that still escapes me….I just don't understand what his motive is and it's bothering me immensely."

"Me too." Seto replied simply. "I didn't know this tournament was even happening until I got here, and I'm fairly recognized in the game myself yet received no invitation. I only came here because your father's staff kidnapped my brother."

Feeling somewhat at fault for his grievance, Cecelia was unsure if she was able to comfort him. Instead, she began to shed tears for him, unable to understand what he must have been going through. She looked away from him so he wouldn't see through gritted teeth, alerting him quickly to realizing that his word choice from prior was poor and he might have attacked her indirectly. He hastily plotted a way to try and calm her down without making things awkward, but failed, leaving him to stare up at her guiltily, knowing he had obviously upset her. Cecelia took a deep breath in, holding her tears back as much as she could, looking back down at her lap.

"Hey…" she began hesitantly, already devising her own method of sidetracking the conversation "In the morning if you want to freshen up a bit, you're welcome to use my bath if you need." She began thinking of how relaxing a hot bath could be to soothe her to continue to calm down "I know I like the feeling of being clean."

Catching the signal to move along with the conversation easily, Seto smiled slightly to ease the tension on his end.

"I might take you up on that offer, it's good for waking up too." He followed along.

"Mhmm" she moaned, still caught up in the feeling of soaking in hot water for a ridiculously long time. She looked back over to him with a weird expression. "You know, I'm not really all that tired anymore…"

Seto chuckled, glad to see that her mood had cleared up enough for her to move away from frowning.

"Well you've been sleeping all day, I don't really blame you." He teased, shifting in his spot a little. "Even so, I'm not tired anymore either." His eyes strayed again, happy to see where this was going. He finally had some alone time with her that had little chance of being tampered with, he could finally start to become a part of her life again after being away from it for so long. "It's been a while, can we catch up a bit?"

Relieved that Seto seemed back to the normal self she remembered, she slid back under her blanket some more to get comfortable, tucking one of the pillows from her mountain of cushions under her chest, crossed her arms over another and rested her head on them, her head facing Seto contently.

"I couldn't be happier that you asked." She replied politely, returning to her more formal, elegant mannerisms cheerfully. "I've began to miss talking to you about everything a great deal." She briefly thought of where to start "I imagine your corporation has changed quite a bit since we last spoke."

Seto felt a rush of thrill as she talked in her old, overly polite, classy fashion. It excited him a little, since he had always thought it was cute.

"I never wished to become so distant." He agreed in a similar way yet playfully, recalling how his stepfather had taught him to address those of wealth and class. "In all seriousness, one could say I'm not fueling a war anymore." He joked cynically. "I've changed the focus of the company to something more friendly. Gaming, to be precise. What about you? Still studying away?"

Knowing it was meant to be lighthearted and that the two of them were trying to move away from hardships, she couldn't help but realize the truth behind his words, and frowned again, disappointed with herself. She couldn't help but face that she hadn't accomplished much of anything despite several years passing.

"Unfortunately." She responded heavily. "It's all I am good for these days…" she shifted her gaze away again to the windows, the moon now fighting with the ceiling-high draperies for a place in her room, the remaining light from outside still managing to add a glimmer to her still-glossy eyes "As much as I want to learn about everything there is to know about the world, I feel that doing so from my study alone isn't the most effective way to do it…" she shook her head, depressed once again. Seto's glance began to harden again, picking up that she was about to drop a heavy load of emotions onto him and listened hard.

"I don't talk to others unless I'm exposed to them here at the estate." She continued intensely. "I don't go outside unless my father requests I do…Sometimes I question what truly defines learning and living, or to truly experience something, to me it's a mythical thing. The concept has been stuck to me for a long time, I just simply don't find learning enjoyable anymore, I only do it to pass the time in hope that I finish what I've started one day."

While she spoke, Seto had taken her words heavily to heart. He had known years ago that if she continued to study daily from morning to night that she would grow depressed and worn out. He knew the feeling himself, and it hurt to witness in person far more. He suddenly felt a sting in his eyes, questioning how it could be that seeing her this way could almost bring him to the verge of tears. He never cries, or at least he had lead everyone to believe. Was it because he knew from his own life that it had been a heavy burden and was reluctantly remembering the feeling? He didn't want to admit that his feelings for Cecelia made him emotionally weak, but he was fully aware that it was contributing to the weight that Cecelia's lamenting had placed on him. He wondered if there would ever be an opportunity to say it without confronting her or his conscious mind telling him not to even if the chance arose, thought briefly about potentially doing it after everything as of late had been resolved, then dismissed the thought entirely, taking him back to heavy depression. Cecelia shook her head, embarrassed and anxious to continue based on Seto's blank reaction.

"I'm sorry," she blurted out, frazzled "I've gone too existential…It just came out-"

"Please don't feel that way about this." Seto halted her almost involuntarily, leaving Cecelia dazed and gawking at him, stunned. Seto wanted to assure her it was alright, he wanted her close. He wanted nothing more than to make her try and feel better, he wanted affection. Above all, he was flustered that he still felt tears forcing themselves to his eyes over this whole thing. Despite it all, he made no attempt to satisfy any of his emotional signals that had been screaming at him.

"We wanted to talk, and I'm still here, that won't change." He told her solidly. "I don't mean to take away from you, but I understand the feeling, I really do. Doing the same thing day in and day out, it grows on you."

Her lips quivering, Cecelia nodded silently. Seto swore he had seen her trembling from the silhouette the light had given her, but the room was now too dark to tell.

"I've been in the same boat." He continued squarely. "I never really brought much attention to it since it hasn't really been relevant to us at all, but Gazeburo really whipped me into shape when I was adopted…" he paused to think about his next part, sighing heavily at the thought of how talking had suddenly became so difficult. "The difference between you and I is that I wish I had more time to myself while you have too much time to fill…To just be at home and not have to work and do what I want to do. I mean, I work because I have to, I guess, but not because there's nothing else available…I've built such a reputation, if it's not kept well then things just go sour, and I don't wish for that on anyone."

Cecelia, still staring at what she could still see of him, wasn't surprised with his telling. She had guessed he was a busy man, just like her father, he had built a name for himself. Her thoughts shifted to Mokuba, picturing him at home alone, doing schoolwork while he waited for Seto to come home. What if Seto had a late night? Does Mokuba cook? What if he had problems with his homework or needed to talk about something…anything? The idea troubled her.

"I want to be with my brother." Seto continued firmly. "I'm like his dad, but I'm not, and I can't help but think that he wishes that I was around more, but he never says it, or maybe he just can't because I'm not around…"

This had hit too close to home for Cecelia. The times she wished that she could just go to his suite and talk to him, only for one of the caretakers to insist that she go back to her room and study. The times she had tried paging him with no response. The times Maxmillion had requested something of her while he took a business trip away from home and nothing more, it all came back to her at once. As always, she tried to tell herself that her father was just busy, he can't help it, he had full intention of trying to make it up to her one day, trying to justify why she was still waiting for that day to come.

"Mokuba knows you better than everyone, though." She told him gently, fighting back tears yet again. "He understands you, maybe that's why he doesn't ever question it…He's a very kind boy, from my short experience with him."

'Seto, I don't think it will work,' Mokuba's voice rang in Seto's mind. 'Cecelia had come earlier to try and pick it but it wouldn't budge because it's so old…'

"That's right, you were trying to get him out of that cell." Seto muttered under his breath but was still audible. Cecelia had been everything he would have expected in a situation like that. Even when he had finally arrived at the scene, she was already rushing back with a solution. "I honestly can't thank you properly for trying to help." He felt his heart pounding within him. Why was something as easy as speaking becoming such a task for him now?

"I wish I knew why he was there…" she responded softly. "The poor boy looked awful. It was only natural that I would try to do what I could…" she yawned groggily "Pardon me. Even given such circumstances, he was still kind enough to invite me to come and visit you two after all of this." She managed a weary smile. "Your kindness runs in the family."

Seto grimaced in shame, knowing that his so called 'kindness' had run short over the years. He was doubtful that mentioning it would be a good idea, but went along with it anyways.

"I wish I could say I was as kind as you remember." He spoke lowly in a serious tone. "I can't afford to leave room for it anymore." He still felt his heart rapidly firing against his chest, he felt the need to say more. "Besides, the offer to come and visit has always been there-" he stopped himself, realizing what he'd done. He'd make it sound like she purposely hadn't taken the opportunity to visit him.

'Shit.' He cursed with a quick grit of his teeth, bracing himself for impact.

Cecelia felt like she had been slammed against a wall. She didn't know how to interpret Seto's words, but it hurt regardless. It's not like she's been allowed to ever leave the estate for her entire life.

"That's…Not really how I meant it to come across…" she rebounded carefully, starting to lose her hold on fighting back her tears. "Forgive me, I'm not thinking about what I'm saying…" now flustered with herself again, knowing she had been making a mess of herself, she shifted in bed once again. "I don't believe for a second that your kindness has faltered…Perhaps you are being more selective as to who has earned it from you."

'That could have been a lot worse.' Seto praised whatever God had been watching over them for keeping their conversation somewhat tame. 'I deserved worse there.'

"Maybe." He replied. "I miss having company, or uh, being in your company, I guess…" he struggled to go on, knowing he was digging himself a hole he might not be able to come out of. "I had never received any messages or letters from you or your father, so I assumed that you or Maxmillion was unintererested-"

Again with the walls.

'He never received anything?!' Cecelia thought frantically. She remembered the journal that Seto had gifted her. She remembered tearing the very first pages out of it to write a letter to him after the party with her new favourite pen. 'But, I wrote to him so soon…This whole time, he had never received my letter?! Has these several years of us being so quiet been a waiting game?!'

"I don't-It can't be…" she had stammered out in distress. "I had written to you as soon as I could, I even used the first pages of my journal to do it…" she went on, distraught. "The last thing I had heard was that Gazeburo had passed away…I wasn't allowed to go to the funeral! I thought you had wanted time to be alone and you just hadn't responded…I didn't mean for it to be this way, I swear…" she began to cry against her will, the indication that it had begun was in her last words. She had wanted nothing more to see, or even hear from Seto for too long, and all of this time, it wasn't either of their intentions for it to be this way.

Seto had been laying frozen as she went on, his heart went from pounding fiercely to stopping entirely it had seemed. She had made the effort, but how could he have not known? How could he have gotten absolutely nothing from her?

"Cecelia, please don't cry…" he had managed to get out of him

"I've missed you so much!" she yelled hysterically. "I would have done anything to see you! This life is so boring!" she sobbed, overwrought, while Seto stared into the dark, somewhat relieved that he couldn't see Cecelia's state of depression, but ashamed that he had been what brought her to tears.

'Is this what having feelings for someone is supposed to be like?' he thought painfully to himself. 'This feeling that I've hurt her as if it meant everything is crashing down around me?' he lay petrified beside her as she continued to cry heavily. He felt a swift movement of the blankets around him as Cecelia had buried herself under the blanket, trying to muffle the noise of her distress. Finally wanting to react, finally thinking that it was time he did something about his built up emotions, his heart had seemed to start up again, going back to it's heavy, quickened pulse. He shifted close to her quickly, pulled the mass of blankets that enclosed her as tightly to him as he could manage, peeled back the blankets to expose her head and placed a hand on the back of her head and into a mass of her frazzled hair, placing it against his chest. Feeling contact against his clothes, Cecelia froze for a moment, then pulled her arms out of the blankets and clutched his shirt desperately, rubbing the side of her head against the inside of his shoulder as she continued to cry. Strangely relieved, Seto's body relaxed and he began to stroke her hair slowly.

'He's so warm…' Cecelia thought to herself pleasantly, the feeling of his hands running through her hair providing a euphoria she had never experienced before. 'He's so gentle and warm, I've never been this close to him...What could he possibly be thinking for this to have happened…' she briefly remembered the dream she had from a couple of hours ago, good lord it had been hours, the part where he brought her close and they had gone in for a kiss but was interrupted by their parents. 'Maybe he does feel the same as I do.' She told herself as she still sobbed in his chest 'Maybe he's been struggling to face his feelings too.'

"You deserve to be upset." Seto told her assuredly. "I won't ask that you don't cry anymore." He grabbed the rest of the blanket that had still enclosed Cecelia and slipped underneath it, pulled her in again, and continued stroking her hair again. Cecelia snuggled into him affectionately.

"I've waited too long for this." She said cryptically with a tired, weary tone. Too tired to be anxious about her being likely to have figured him out now, he continued to stroke her hair silently until the both of them fell asleep.