Note: Hey there! As you can tell by the summary, this is an AU where Billy is alive as a super suave fashion star. The design and idea of fashionista Billy comes from the episode "The Trouble with Hairy" (episode 22, I believe). It's my first multi-chaptered DTMG fic, but I think it gonna be lots of fun!

Now, I know not many people are huge fans of OCs, but I had to put a couple in here just because I didn't want Billy to be lonely. If you read my last ectofeature fic, you already got a little taste of Ash. Please, if you don't like OCs, don't take them seriously.

Chapter 1

"Mystery Shopper"

Billy makes no effort to cover his loud, wide-mouthed yawn. It's already been an hour since his shift had started, yet the small clothing store only had about two customers, one of which was rung up by Billy's co-worker, Dante.

The stylish cashier stretches his long arms over the black counter, which is splattered with various metallic paints to give it that "cool/hipster" look. Personally, Billy thinks it just looks like something a two-year-old could've whipped up. He looks over at a pile of clothing hangers, picks one up, and hangs it from one of his black gauges. Fun times.

It's no surprise there aren't many customers; Billy works at a small store hidden at the end of an equally small annex in the large Beverly Heights Mall. It is an out-of-the-way hipster store that seems to be too overpriced for some people. The manager, a woman who goes by "Madame X", had aptly named the store X-ternal; and Billy loathes her for it. Honestly, it's as if the lady does everything in her power to ensure that Billy (and Dante) earn lass than minimum wage due to lack of customers; and Billy simply can't handle it anymore.

Growing up, Billy wasn't like most boys. Instead of using sticks as pretend swords and having a strange fettish for fire trucks, Billy preferred to channel his energy to something more creative, such as fashion.

And oh, how Billy loves fashion. He would spend entire class periods sketching new outfits, not giving a single fuck about what his teacher would drone on about. However, now in his mid-twenties, Billy is tired of simple pencil sketches and daydreams. He wants to put his name out in the fashion world, have people recognize his work from a mile away. But for now, it seems as though he has to make do with what he has… which isn't a whole lot.

Plus, it doesn't help that most of the money Billy earns is spent on clothes. Currently, he is clad in an aqua shirt with an olive-green jacket over it, the jacket's collar being a light pink. Billy's jacket has a few multi-coloured buttons on it, and to top it all off (not literally...), his tight jeans are dyed a sharp violet. Normally, an outift with this many colours is considered a fashion train wreck. But because Billy's hair, gauges, and eyewear are so dark, it seems to work for him.

About a minute has passed since Billy zoned out, and now he is proudly donning a chain of clothing hangers from his right earlobe; sort of like monkeys in a barrel. He sighs and slams his head on the counter. Is this really what his life has come to? Apparently so, seeing as how Billy is currently acting pretty childish, even for him and- wait! What is that noise? Is that a customer? Billy stiffens and stops breathing to listen better.

Yes, there is definitely someone else in the store right now. Billy lifts his head from the counter and tries to nonchalantly see who it is. With Dante currently on lunch, Billy is the only one in the store to ring up this "mystery shopper."

There's a bit of rustling coming from the guys' section. Ringing up guys is a little more monotonous than girls (alas, not all men have Billy's sense of fashion), but a customer is a customer.

Billy is about to turn to a random clothing rack to make himself look busy, but accidentally catches one of the hangers from his gauges on a wire rack. It yanks his ear and nearly rips it apart- if not for Billy's quick reflexes. It hurts like hell.

"Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!" he loudly hisses as he winces in pain. Billy, quickly realizing there is someone else in the store, freezes. He straightens himself up and unhooks the first hanger from his gauge, letting the chain fall to the floor. I'll get them later. He turns backs around to the counter, to busy himself and act as if he didn't just make a crude outburst, when he notices that the "mystery shopper" is right on the other side of the counter, staring at him.

Holy mother of God, Billy thinks. This guy is gorgeous. His reddish brown eyes compliment his sun-kissed skin so well, and his hair! Oh, what demon did he make a deal with to get such thick, chestnut-coloured hair? Sure, it's unruly and looks like a bitch to maintain, but it's the good kind of messy. The really, really hot kind of messy. Billy moves his field of vision to study the guys clothes. They're a bit baggy and don't fit too well with his scrawny-esque figure; just a plain t-shirt and skinny jeans. Billy inwardly frowns; this guy needs help.

The wannabe fashion star looks up at to meet the guy's eyes again. He now has one eyebrow raised. Oh hell, this guy probably thinks Billy's some kind of mental patient now. Just peachy.

Billy clears his throat, which seemed to have gotten dry a while ago. "You, err, need something, brototype?" The guy just looks more confused than before, but replies nevertheless.

"Uh, well, I was wondering if I could use a changing room?" He gestures to a couple of shirts he's holding; shirts Billy was completely oblivious to until now. Billy nods, a little too quickly.

"Sh-sure, they're right over here, Monte Carbro." Billy walks out from behind the counter over to a couple of empty changing rooms. He gestures to them with his thumb. "Take your pick."

Billy is given a curt nod as the guys makes his way over to the dressing rooms. After the guy enters one and closes the curtain, Billy grips onto a nearby clothing rack and tries to steady his heartbeat. God, he looked like an idiot; what was going on just then!? When he's with his friends, Billy is usually the most calm and easy going out of everyone. Now, in the presence of a complete stranger no less, Billy is a wreck.

Thankfully, his short attention span doesn't let him think about the subject for much longer, and his gaze lands on the unoccupied dressing room. It's empty (no shit, really?), but for some reason there's a few articles of clothing left on the bench. Bastards didn't even bother returning them to the front counter. Billy sighs as he goes to retrieve them.

The room is dark and small, which isn't a surprise because for crying out loud it's a dressing room. The walls are painted in a deep purple, and the small bench in the room is covered in rainbow glitter, much to the dismay of customers who don't appreciate buying clothing covered in sparkles. On the wall is a mirror, and on the bench, a pile of clothes; the reason Billy is here in the first place.

Billy picks up a shirt from the bench and starts to fold it (what type of shirt is up to the reader's imagination to decide!). The rustling of fabric can be heard coming from the other dressing room, which is directly adjacent to the one Billy's in. He pauses his folding and looks around, really for no reason. When Billy's eyes land upon the ceiling, he groans in disdain. Hanging on the ceiling is a cobweb. A dirty, old, disgusting cobweb.

Not in the mood for housekeeping, Billy reluctantly climbs onto the bench to get rid of the audacious cobweb hanging on the ceiling. He picks up a clothing hanger from the bench, as he would never in a million years touch something so filthy with his bare hands. As Billy is standing on the bench, he notices that the cobweb is directly above the short wall separating the two changing rooms.

He tells himself no. No, Billy. Fight the temptation. Resist the urge to look over the thin, purple wall and see the super hot customer change out his clothes... Yeah, there's no way in hell Billy's passing this up. He bites his lip before getting onto his tiptoes, careful not to make a sound. He cranes his neck to see over the wall, just enough for his eyes to poke out on top of the plywood divider. Billy nearly faints.

There, a mere few feet from Billy, is an angel- no. A god! He had just taken a shirt off, and is now trying to get the hanger off of another one. Little does the zambroni know, he is being watched. Billy covers his mouth with one hand to make sure he is silent. The guy looks in the mirror as he is about to put a Batman shirt on, and it is only a second before he sees Billy's face in the corner of the mirror. His eyes widen and his jaw drops to the floor.

Billy ducks behind the wall and slips on a shirt that's still on the bench. He falls onto his rear, causing quite the scene as clothes and hangers fly in the air. Cringing, Billy hears the customer storming into the changing room he's in. The employee looks up to see the customer standing in the doorway, looking angry, creeped out, and in shock. Friggin perfect.