DUCK, DOG, AND BOY WITH KEY: A TALE OF KINGDOM HEARTS
~I want the Nightmare before Christmas DVD. I really do. Its one of my most favorite movies EVER. So anyway, I want new episodes of Invader Zim. I want them NOW. Those parasites that call themselves Nickelodeon refuse to show the remaining episodes because they hate creativity and stuff that's actually funny. Glah. I'm just not in a good mood and need to lash out at someone. DIE BUTTERFLY! Yeah, yer happy NOW, huh?! Gasp. I just killed a Butterfly in my blind rage. AH FEEL HAPPY MAMMA!~Silver Neko, yay for pollution!
"So victorious 3 guys return to town of travel happiness. They find Ninja Thief Girl waiting by mail box for Ninja Thief girl's new "Massager" Naughty Naughty Ninja Thief Girl! She say that no good Angry Rain Cloud Guy, whom she not sleeping with no more, am training in underground stink hole. TO STINK HOLE! OW! The heart eating things come back for sugar clogged arteries! Yay!
In Stink hole, super alive Flower Girl and super have no problem making you dead "Leon" am training for super doom. When Key Boy try to talk to Gun/Sword swinging "Leon", he am greeted with nearly being cut into deadness. Angry Rain cloud guy sad that he miss killing stupid boy with key. Angry Rain cloud guy yell at Key Boy to flee from Angry Rain cloud guy's eyesight or DIE. He then hurl rock in Dog's direction. Rock hits Dog square in the head with sickening CRACK.
Silence.
"Hey look fellas! Ah found a purdy rock!" Dog triumphantly announces as he holds rock up for all to see. Duck snaps his fingers in annoyance. Flower Girl, concerned that Angry Rain cloud guy may slaughter da unlikely heroes in a flurry of Angry Rain cloud guy rage, tell trio of yummy in ya tummy to go see Cid man for help with happy Gummy ship. Flee! Angry Rain cloud guy demands coffee!
In Cid man #7's shop of no return, Cid man REFUSE TO DO STUFF for HORRIBLE Key Boy and equally HORRIBLE Duck and Dog because Cid man am FILLED with SPITE! It then, thanks to slow reaction time of Dog's nervous system, that Dog give out shrill screaming/inhaling noise of pain. Cid man, frightened and disturbed by weeping man like Dog thing, shove book into Key Boy's belly and say for them to take it to WIZARD MAN. Cid man will fix ship good while they do it. Flee! Now!
And so Duck, Key Boy, and sniffing in unhappy Dog, head for place where it am shiny and there am happy doggy fountain. After burning down door and hoping across evil floating rocks, 3 doomed things head into poorly kept wizard house. Hey! It am empty with life! Uh oh! It THAT GIRL(Duh duh duh dun duh DUH!) hallucination time! Yay! Key Boy's comrades become somewhat concerned when Key Boy stare at wall silently and drool.
BUT THEN! It Wizard man! Key Boy hand over Book and say stuff. Wizard take book and make warbling noise. FAIRY GODMOTHER! Yay! She look at Dog's purdy rock and make it into Summon Gem of Lion who's movie am really rip-off of Anime! Whee! Don't hurt Kimahri! While Dog and Duck am arguing over who get to use death Lion of death, Key Boy decide to take peek at book that Wizard have placed on desk.
Peek!
White light SUCK Key Boy into book. No one notice because they watching Duck scream at Dog about how sharing is for the DOOMED!
Key Boy finds Key Boy's self in Forest of a thousand trees! Whoo. Oh! Look who am sitting on log! It am Poop Bear! He about to have Brain amorism! Poop Bear say that he am using his AMAZING brain to think of ways to say stuff. He also say that his pals am gone. Then, at unfathomable speed of CHAIR, Poop Bear waddle out of Meadow and to house. Key Boy already wants out of this horrible, family friendly place.
AT DA POOP BEAR'S HOUSE! Poop bear needs Honey or he will go INSANE. While Poop Bear sits on floor of house, Key Boy proceeds to loot home of anything not bolted down. Yay! So then Key Boy leaves house and runs into OWL who can eat BABIES! Key Boy runs like a fat mouse from a Cobra with a party hat on! IT MAKE NO SENSE SO FEAR EET!
Doom! That is what Kimahri calls Gods most evil creation: Honey Tree! Tiny bite sized Piggy does the dance and fear and uncertainty! Then dark shadow falls upon him! It am giant mass of terror that am Key Boy! Flee Piggy! FLEE! So Piggy flees, but then curses his stubby Piggy legs as Key Boy picks him up and laughs at Piggy's shrill screams of terror!
Looky! It am Honey addict! He come for da honey in da tummy! So, by amazing new "Balloon" technology, Poop Bear am able to fly up to where num-nums am. But bees refuse to share! POP! It then that Key Boy have AMAZING idea! HE take KEY and WHACK da BEES! Piggy and Poop bear cheer at incredible brain meats of Key Boy!
ONCE AGAIN! Poop bear am attached to Balloon and levitate up to da bees! Key Boy whacks at evil honey makers! Uh oh! Bees going after Key Boy now! Yay for not being allergic to bees, for Key Boy would of surly been dead by now! Poop Bear get Poop bear's honey and all am happy. Happy until Poop bear start to choke on something in honey. With hacking sound of yuck, Poop bear puke shiny rock at Key Boy with high speeds! Key Boy meets same fate at Dog, only Key Boy feels the pain NOW. Key Boy pass out with rock embedded in skull.
Key Boy awaken to sound of Piggy's whining. Key Boy find that Piggy and Poop Bear have dragged Key Boy's prone form to MR. BUNNY'S house to feed upon more honey. Why have Poop bear no exploded with honey yet?! Poop Bear break door off hinges and waddle into screaming Mr. Bunny's house.
"Feed me da huney or ah weel break you head and eats you tender brains. Mmmm, brains." Poop bear grunts. Mr. Bunny say he no have Honey! But Key Boy, being tall enough to pick up all 3 stuffed animals WHO LIVE and rip 'em apart, spot pot of honey in roots of house! Poop Bear feeds! Key Boy, disgusted with Poop Bear's glutinous ways, decides to leave and look for way out of horrible book of joy. But Piggy cries out in dismay! It seem Poop Bear am stuck in Mr. Rabbits hole!
HAHAHA! YES! KIMAHRI WRITE THAT PURPOSELY! KIMAHRI AM DIRTY! YAY FOR KIMAHRI!
BUT THEN! Look out! It am death from above AKA Bouncy Cat! Bouncing doom decide to smash all fruit in Mr. Rabbits garden because he no have respect for others property! YES! Key Boy must stop him! Bounce Kill monster hop on Key Boy's head and get foot impaled on spikey hair! VICTORY FOR KEY BOY! So Poop Bear am freed and all am happy, Yes? Glah. You WRONG!
Much later, while Key Boy wandering about, looking for way out of death book, Key Boy find Poop Bear and Piggy on bridge. CHEESE! It am Angst Donkey! He so burdened with sad juice that he no try to save self from watery grave! KEY BOY AM HERO AGAIN! So then, Angst Donkey slowly gasp in shock, for Angst Donkey's tail am GONE. OH NO. Donkey weeps inwardly. BUT WAIT! BABY EATING OWL HAVE AMAZING PLAN!
IF Poop Bear ride on swing of happy, then Poop Bear find Tail! IT SO SIMPLY AND STUPID! Time for treacherous trek up hill to swing! HONEY POT! BEAR MUST FEED!
2 hours later...
DONE! Onward to hill! POT! FEAST! Key Boy sighs with hate. FINALLY! Hill and Swing! Poop Bear ON swing! Time for push! POOP BEAR FLIES! Poop bear land somewhere far away, but no find tail. TO SWING AGAIN! Key Boy weeps!
FINALLY! Bear land with crunch on Angst Donkey's house and finds tail! Donkey is silently pleased! Key Boy hot glue tail to Sorrow Donkey's ass and all is well. BACK AT POOP BEAR'S HOUSE! Bear am SO cold! Make fire for Bear or he WILL eat you. Key Boy are so scared. Fire is GOOD.
SOMEWHERE ELSE! In forest of BOUNCY CAT OF DEATH, Bounce beast and Mini Rat am destroying environment with trampling of plants! To make COMPLICATED story short, 2 evil mammals make large STOOPID mammal jump around, then whack pot of NUTS! THEN, Owl who consumes young children force Key Freak to hunt nuts for Owl, or he WILL eat Key Boy version of you. Fear drives Key Boy to gather nuts! Yay!
Much, much, much later, after Bounce thing bounce stuff, Key Boy find self in place full of mud. Looky! It am stupid yet aggressive Poop Bear! He am looking for friends! Key Boy help? Of course he do! Friends am found! ALL AM WELL!
LATER, WHEN IT AM NIGHT! Poop Bear, Piggy, Mr. Bunny, Baby eating Owl, Bouncy Cat, Mini Rat and Key Boy am enjoying stars! IT TIME TO TALK ABOUT VALUE OF FRIENDSHIP! Whee. KEY BOY NO CAN TAKE EET NO MORE! He FLEE FLEE FLEE from insane stuffed animals and then suddenly am consumed by happy light! HE AM GONE FROM BOOK! YAY! Then, for reason Kimahri no get, world that am Book am locked by Key Boy and all am happy.
BACK IN WORLD THAT AM NOT BOOK!
Duck am about to ELECTROCUTE Dog so that Duck may possess Summon Gem of lion, when Key Boy spill out of book and scream with happy! FUN FACT! YOU KNOW THAT KEY BOY STILL HAVE ROCK FROM HONEY IN SKULL? YES HE DO! Fairy Grandma say that it am ALSO Summon Gem for happy Deer who momma got SHOT! Whee! Duck says that DOG should have stupid Deer, and so Dog does. In future, Deer save life of Dog many time while Lion chomp head of Duck because Duck am nummy. DUCK WEEPS!
So Team leaves magic house only to run into.......
SPOOKY BOY!
Key Boy gasps with SHOCK! As does Kimahri! Time for heart pills!"
~Yay! Now for a VERY serious issue! I like Yoai. I like eet GOOD. And I'm a girl, just for those of you who are still unsure. I WANT and have wanted to write a yoai fic for the longest time. Perhaps one on Invader Zim or a Kuja/Zidane fic. BUT! one of my greatest fears(besides the fact that my parents or brother might stumble upon my evil writing of wonderful filth) is dat I'll get them out of character, more then the fact that that those peoples hate each others guts. I mean, Kimahri says is based on a Kimahri who is disgruntled and sarcastic(Note, I cringe at the thought of trying to write a lemon involving Kimahri. It's hard to think of a way to do eet) When the real Kimahri rarely talks at all and has little or none personality. Blah. So, with telling you, the either glee filled or now disgusted people, what weighs upon my mind, I decide to go see the movie "Jackass" and let my woes dissolve into evil laughter. Teehee!~Silver Neko, stop looking at meeee!
~I want the Nightmare before Christmas DVD. I really do. Its one of my most favorite movies EVER. So anyway, I want new episodes of Invader Zim. I want them NOW. Those parasites that call themselves Nickelodeon refuse to show the remaining episodes because they hate creativity and stuff that's actually funny. Glah. I'm just not in a good mood and need to lash out at someone. DIE BUTTERFLY! Yeah, yer happy NOW, huh?! Gasp. I just killed a Butterfly in my blind rage. AH FEEL HAPPY MAMMA!~Silver Neko, yay for pollution!
"So victorious 3 guys return to town of travel happiness. They find Ninja Thief Girl waiting by mail box for Ninja Thief girl's new "Massager" Naughty Naughty Ninja Thief Girl! She say that no good Angry Rain Cloud Guy, whom she not sleeping with no more, am training in underground stink hole. TO STINK HOLE! OW! The heart eating things come back for sugar clogged arteries! Yay!
In Stink hole, super alive Flower Girl and super have no problem making you dead "Leon" am training for super doom. When Key Boy try to talk to Gun/Sword swinging "Leon", he am greeted with nearly being cut into deadness. Angry Rain cloud guy sad that he miss killing stupid boy with key. Angry Rain cloud guy yell at Key Boy to flee from Angry Rain cloud guy's eyesight or DIE. He then hurl rock in Dog's direction. Rock hits Dog square in the head with sickening CRACK.
Silence.
"Hey look fellas! Ah found a purdy rock!" Dog triumphantly announces as he holds rock up for all to see. Duck snaps his fingers in annoyance. Flower Girl, concerned that Angry Rain cloud guy may slaughter da unlikely heroes in a flurry of Angry Rain cloud guy rage, tell trio of yummy in ya tummy to go see Cid man for help with happy Gummy ship. Flee! Angry Rain cloud guy demands coffee!
In Cid man #7's shop of no return, Cid man REFUSE TO DO STUFF for HORRIBLE Key Boy and equally HORRIBLE Duck and Dog because Cid man am FILLED with SPITE! It then, thanks to slow reaction time of Dog's nervous system, that Dog give out shrill screaming/inhaling noise of pain. Cid man, frightened and disturbed by weeping man like Dog thing, shove book into Key Boy's belly and say for them to take it to WIZARD MAN. Cid man will fix ship good while they do it. Flee! Now!
And so Duck, Key Boy, and sniffing in unhappy Dog, head for place where it am shiny and there am happy doggy fountain. After burning down door and hoping across evil floating rocks, 3 doomed things head into poorly kept wizard house. Hey! It am empty with life! Uh oh! It THAT GIRL(Duh duh duh dun duh DUH!) hallucination time! Yay! Key Boy's comrades become somewhat concerned when Key Boy stare at wall silently and drool.
BUT THEN! It Wizard man! Key Boy hand over Book and say stuff. Wizard take book and make warbling noise. FAIRY GODMOTHER! Yay! She look at Dog's purdy rock and make it into Summon Gem of Lion who's movie am really rip-off of Anime! Whee! Don't hurt Kimahri! While Dog and Duck am arguing over who get to use death Lion of death, Key Boy decide to take peek at book that Wizard have placed on desk.
Peek!
White light SUCK Key Boy into book. No one notice because they watching Duck scream at Dog about how sharing is for the DOOMED!
Key Boy finds Key Boy's self in Forest of a thousand trees! Whoo. Oh! Look who am sitting on log! It am Poop Bear! He about to have Brain amorism! Poop Bear say that he am using his AMAZING brain to think of ways to say stuff. He also say that his pals am gone. Then, at unfathomable speed of CHAIR, Poop Bear waddle out of Meadow and to house. Key Boy already wants out of this horrible, family friendly place.
AT DA POOP BEAR'S HOUSE! Poop bear needs Honey or he will go INSANE. While Poop Bear sits on floor of house, Key Boy proceeds to loot home of anything not bolted down. Yay! So then Key Boy leaves house and runs into OWL who can eat BABIES! Key Boy runs like a fat mouse from a Cobra with a party hat on! IT MAKE NO SENSE SO FEAR EET!
Doom! That is what Kimahri calls Gods most evil creation: Honey Tree! Tiny bite sized Piggy does the dance and fear and uncertainty! Then dark shadow falls upon him! It am giant mass of terror that am Key Boy! Flee Piggy! FLEE! So Piggy flees, but then curses his stubby Piggy legs as Key Boy picks him up and laughs at Piggy's shrill screams of terror!
Looky! It am Honey addict! He come for da honey in da tummy! So, by amazing new "Balloon" technology, Poop Bear am able to fly up to where num-nums am. But bees refuse to share! POP! It then that Key Boy have AMAZING idea! HE take KEY and WHACK da BEES! Piggy and Poop bear cheer at incredible brain meats of Key Boy!
ONCE AGAIN! Poop bear am attached to Balloon and levitate up to da bees! Key Boy whacks at evil honey makers! Uh oh! Bees going after Key Boy now! Yay for not being allergic to bees, for Key Boy would of surly been dead by now! Poop Bear get Poop bear's honey and all am happy. Happy until Poop bear start to choke on something in honey. With hacking sound of yuck, Poop bear puke shiny rock at Key Boy with high speeds! Key Boy meets same fate at Dog, only Key Boy feels the pain NOW. Key Boy pass out with rock embedded in skull.
Key Boy awaken to sound of Piggy's whining. Key Boy find that Piggy and Poop Bear have dragged Key Boy's prone form to MR. BUNNY'S house to feed upon more honey. Why have Poop bear no exploded with honey yet?! Poop Bear break door off hinges and waddle into screaming Mr. Bunny's house.
"Feed me da huney or ah weel break you head and eats you tender brains. Mmmm, brains." Poop bear grunts. Mr. Bunny say he no have Honey! But Key Boy, being tall enough to pick up all 3 stuffed animals WHO LIVE and rip 'em apart, spot pot of honey in roots of house! Poop Bear feeds! Key Boy, disgusted with Poop Bear's glutinous ways, decides to leave and look for way out of horrible book of joy. But Piggy cries out in dismay! It seem Poop Bear am stuck in Mr. Rabbits hole!
HAHAHA! YES! KIMAHRI WRITE THAT PURPOSELY! KIMAHRI AM DIRTY! YAY FOR KIMAHRI!
BUT THEN! Look out! It am death from above AKA Bouncy Cat! Bouncing doom decide to smash all fruit in Mr. Rabbits garden because he no have respect for others property! YES! Key Boy must stop him! Bounce Kill monster hop on Key Boy's head and get foot impaled on spikey hair! VICTORY FOR KEY BOY! So Poop Bear am freed and all am happy, Yes? Glah. You WRONG!
Much later, while Key Boy wandering about, looking for way out of death book, Key Boy find Poop Bear and Piggy on bridge. CHEESE! It am Angst Donkey! He so burdened with sad juice that he no try to save self from watery grave! KEY BOY AM HERO AGAIN! So then, Angst Donkey slowly gasp in shock, for Angst Donkey's tail am GONE. OH NO. Donkey weeps inwardly. BUT WAIT! BABY EATING OWL HAVE AMAZING PLAN!
IF Poop Bear ride on swing of happy, then Poop Bear find Tail! IT SO SIMPLY AND STUPID! Time for treacherous trek up hill to swing! HONEY POT! BEAR MUST FEED!
2 hours later...
DONE! Onward to hill! POT! FEAST! Key Boy sighs with hate. FINALLY! Hill and Swing! Poop Bear ON swing! Time for push! POOP BEAR FLIES! Poop bear land somewhere far away, but no find tail. TO SWING AGAIN! Key Boy weeps!
FINALLY! Bear land with crunch on Angst Donkey's house and finds tail! Donkey is silently pleased! Key Boy hot glue tail to Sorrow Donkey's ass and all is well. BACK AT POOP BEAR'S HOUSE! Bear am SO cold! Make fire for Bear or he WILL eat you. Key Boy are so scared. Fire is GOOD.
SOMEWHERE ELSE! In forest of BOUNCY CAT OF DEATH, Bounce beast and Mini Rat am destroying environment with trampling of plants! To make COMPLICATED story short, 2 evil mammals make large STOOPID mammal jump around, then whack pot of NUTS! THEN, Owl who consumes young children force Key Freak to hunt nuts for Owl, or he WILL eat Key Boy version of you. Fear drives Key Boy to gather nuts! Yay!
Much, much, much later, after Bounce thing bounce stuff, Key Boy find self in place full of mud. Looky! It am stupid yet aggressive Poop Bear! He am looking for friends! Key Boy help? Of course he do! Friends am found! ALL AM WELL!
LATER, WHEN IT AM NIGHT! Poop Bear, Piggy, Mr. Bunny, Baby eating Owl, Bouncy Cat, Mini Rat and Key Boy am enjoying stars! IT TIME TO TALK ABOUT VALUE OF FRIENDSHIP! Whee. KEY BOY NO CAN TAKE EET NO MORE! He FLEE FLEE FLEE from insane stuffed animals and then suddenly am consumed by happy light! HE AM GONE FROM BOOK! YAY! Then, for reason Kimahri no get, world that am Book am locked by Key Boy and all am happy.
BACK IN WORLD THAT AM NOT BOOK!
Duck am about to ELECTROCUTE Dog so that Duck may possess Summon Gem of lion, when Key Boy spill out of book and scream with happy! FUN FACT! YOU KNOW THAT KEY BOY STILL HAVE ROCK FROM HONEY IN SKULL? YES HE DO! Fairy Grandma say that it am ALSO Summon Gem for happy Deer who momma got SHOT! Whee! Duck says that DOG should have stupid Deer, and so Dog does. In future, Deer save life of Dog many time while Lion chomp head of Duck because Duck am nummy. DUCK WEEPS!
So Team leaves magic house only to run into.......
SPOOKY BOY!
Key Boy gasps with SHOCK! As does Kimahri! Time for heart pills!"
~Yay! Now for a VERY serious issue! I like Yoai. I like eet GOOD. And I'm a girl, just for those of you who are still unsure. I WANT and have wanted to write a yoai fic for the longest time. Perhaps one on Invader Zim or a Kuja/Zidane fic. BUT! one of my greatest fears(besides the fact that my parents or brother might stumble upon my evil writing of wonderful filth) is dat I'll get them out of character, more then the fact that that those peoples hate each others guts. I mean, Kimahri says is based on a Kimahri who is disgruntled and sarcastic(Note, I cringe at the thought of trying to write a lemon involving Kimahri. It's hard to think of a way to do eet) When the real Kimahri rarely talks at all and has little or none personality. Blah. So, with telling you, the either glee filled or now disgusted people, what weighs upon my mind, I decide to go see the movie "Jackass" and let my woes dissolve into evil laughter. Teehee!~Silver Neko, stop looking at meeee!