Kensi needs to stop calling deeks an idiot shes a fucking idiot

I like deeks so I like this story

I like it! Glad to see he signed the papers!

while the premise of the team backing deeks up with the lapd is a good idea I have to whole heartedly agree with mistririter...your characterizations are way off base...I couldn't get past the phone call scene before I had to just stop reading...

Bates may be an ass but he is not stupid & he was also former military intelligence...he may not have the same resources he had in the military but he wouldn't jeopardize a major op by going into it blind...he would have had his people gathering a lot of intell on the group before he ever sent anyone in and he would have set deeks up with a cover...and there would have to be something timely and MAJOR ready to go down for Bates to send in a man that wasn't at the top of his game...Also, you pushed the story trying to make an impression/develop a characterization that was incorrect by making Bates sound like a petulant child...and not a leader. And keep in mind, Bates has a healthy respect for Hetty and NCIS whether he likes them or not!

Nice job!

I liked the idea of the story, but I had problems with a couple of things. Deeks is not a wimp and he's not stupid. I just don't see him jumping through hoops for Bates. Not like this. If nothing else, he could file a grievance on the department and really get the jerk (Bates) in major trouble because it's obvious that Bates has gone off the deep end. This kind of treatment would not be tolerated. The other thing that bothered me was the team knew Deeks was to be on bed rest and recuperate. Kensi drops him off at LAPD headquarters and the NCIS team doesn't start to worry until they haven't seen him for five months? I find that hard to swallow. I just couldn't suspend belief.

I'm a sucker for any story on Deeks and I do like seeing his vulnerability (which you showed) and his relationships with his NCISLA team. I would really like to see a rewrite because I think it could be a great short story, but it needs to stick to his character, and while Marty Deeks is a cop, he's not a masochistic stupid one who would let Bates take advantage of him like this. I see Deeks as his own man, following orders to a point, but willing and able to speak up if he doesn't think something is right, and to fight for himself and others (proven in his dealings with Jeff Versey in "Personal"). While he would give Bates some leeway because he is his supervisor on the department, he would never let Bates walk all over him like that. At least that's my humble opinion.

I really liked the interaction with his NCIS team. I also enjoyed the bit about Monty. All in all, a pretty good story which would have been much better if it stayed true to Deeks' character.

loves it

Beautiful and powerful.
Deeks needs to sign those papers

Great short story - love the way you showed Bates slowly broking Deeks and the gang rescuing him from himself :)

Hugs

Hissy x

Wonderful story and wonderfully written. I look forward to more of your stories in the future.

wow that was a really good chapter. PLEASE PLEAS PLEASE tell me you are going to continue this. I really wanna see either Hetty put Bates in his place of see Sam knock him out LOL.

great story