Oh, that was so sad and cute. And you're right, Mello probably knew that he was going to die; Matt didn't. And Mello didn't even think about the chance of Matt dying. It was a real 'accident'.

This story is so chill and touchy. I know you want a constructive criticism, but I don't really have something to point in here. Your writing is good. I don't remember seeing any errors or typos. The idea is general and realistic. As if it really could have happened in the Manga or Anime. You kept them both In Character, and their lines fit their personalities.

So I'd say you did a good job (:

I always liked the deep friendship Mello and Matt seemed to have, even though it was never strongly developed in the manga. This was very well-written and I think it fit perfectly, very easy to see it actually happening. :)

Omg! Made me cry! Great story, well written... Good job :D

~BBsugarXX

This was a great portrayal of them The scene flowed nicely, & is wonderful as it is without yaoi. I'm kinda glad there was no yaoi. Their emotions were portrayed nicely without all the detail, like in most oneshots where, "The character was so sad, sad as a butterfly on a rainy day." You didn't overdo it, & I like that. Good job.

Saddest moment when they died. I watched the anime, didnt read the manga... So I dont know how much Matt was portrayed there.. But I felt so sad when they died..

And Mello.. If only he never took off his helmet... This really did help some... Thanks for it.. :)

Mello is my fav...