Cliff hanger but thanks for the read

Truly excellent. I wish you had continued with this.

It's taken me a god awful long time to read this but it was such a pleasure! I really like how you ended it, with Cho being straight forward and a bit emotional even. I think him telling Jane not to see Lisbon speaks volumes, as does Jane's reluctance to agree to that.

I also like that Jane isn't quite himself yet, I think that speaks to his humanity, that he is at least a little human like the rest of us and is processing what happened. I think it's also lovely that you've incorporated Lisbon's family into this. Chris seems sweet and supportive, and she needs that right now.

As always, it's written exceptionally well, especially Lisbon's exchange with her brother and Jane's inner thoughts. Loved it!

Yana

Like Jane is going to listen to Cho. The command was a nice gesture, really...but Jane has never listened to anybody except himself (and Lisbon, when it suits him.) I absolutely laughed at the way Cho answered Jane: "she was shot", and I could just see this entire scene playing out in my head!

I do have to give you major credit for actually mentioning Hightower. I know a lot of fics (and a certain show...) has completely forgotten her in the aftermath of season 3. It kind of annoys me, and your putting Van Pelt on suspension gives me hope that she won't stick around long enough in this fic! *silently cheers*

Update soon! (but take your time. ;))

I think EVERYBODY is preoccupied with internal affairs...besides Jane and Lisbon, who are clearly preoccupied with each other. I'm already appreciating your version of s4 a lot more than what is being played out...don't get me wrong, I love what has been going on, but there are SO many issues that still need to be discussed, and I'm afraid the show is going to forget about these issues.

So, please continue writing your AU fic. I know you will bring up these issues, and you will do them justice.

I just want to hug them both, so I will continue on to the next chapter of your fic!

This is absolutely amazing! I've been so frustrated with the direction the show is going in, and I'm so, so glad this fic deals with the fact that *Jane shot a man* and does not make it okay. I can't wait to see where this is headed! Meanwhile, I'll just hope that the show does as good a job as you are with this fic. Cheers!

"She hadn't done any better of a job with her brothers than she had with her team, she thinks bitterly."

Faaaaaavourite line. Poor Lisbon. Really, she'll never stop carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders, will she?

I'm so happy to see one of her brothers show up, though. And I like Christopher Lisbon; his personality, your physical description of him, everything.

And the fact that he was the only of the Lisbon children to stay in Chicago somehow pleased me a lot. I like how this story continues to flow along nicely, particularly Jane being unnerved that nothing seems to be going as he'd planned.

Which brings me to say: I miss LaRoche. I kind of want him back on the show now.

P.S. No worries, you made the right judgment call ;) Besides, as I'd expected this was perfectly okay and like I said before, with your meticulous writing, you really don't need me :p

I'm looking forward to chapter 3! :)

I'm loving the pacing of this story. Your descriptions are wonderful - and economical - I love that! You are painting pictures in my mind with minimal wording which is wonderful. I like that you included a Lisbon brother - he seems very fleshed out and solid. I like him already :)

This story is shaping up nicely - I am looking forward to the next chapter ;)

oh boyo, let's see what happens next...

You always leave off at the best parts *pouts* Lol.

CHRISTOPHER LISBON! YAY BROTHER(S) :D *g*

Great chapter, cannnnnnnnnnot wait for more!

I just want to hug Lisbon. Someone call her brothers, dammit.

I love that Jane's having to face the fact that he has no idea where to go from here. All his planning and yet when he finally gets what he wanted, he has no idea what to do. He didn't plan for this, lol.

Great chapter, can't wait for the next! :D

Poor Lisbon all alone at the hospital. I really feel for her. She is so determined to help others out that she wont ask for help for herself! I love that she has spotted something that Jane hasn't - that she has identified his blind spot and looks as though she is going to act on it.

And Jane - all I can say is argh! Men! A little support at the right moment goes a long way guys! I like how he is trying to justify the situation to himself - his self talk is spot on.

Thanks for sharing with us :)

Interesting!

I like the two POVs we get in this chapter. You easily track Jane's thoughts through his ordeal, outlining his motives (as irrational as they are) and justifying what he did in his own terms. Very nice. I also liked how Lisbon's immediate thoughts went beyond her own personal welfare. So typical of her and so very intuitive of you. I enjoyed it :)

Yana

Dare I say this was even better than the S4 Premier? :)

I hope you're going to continue this fic as an AU because you got me hooked on the first sentence (okay technically first two).

Quote:

[He settles back in the front passenger's seat, which is far more comfortable than the metal bench in his holding cell, and allows his thoughts to drift freely, no longer under obligation to William Blake poetry and plans for cutting a monster limb from limb.]

Loved this sentence.

I guess Jane should learn plans never go according to plan.

More please!

I am definitely liking this so far, I can't wait to see where you decide to go with this. I think you're pretty spot on with Jane feeling like nothing is going according to plan. Also I really like the way you're handling Lisbon's character. I think that she is much more affected by all of this Jane/Red John stuff than they are showing us in the show. Maybe they will delve into it eventually, but for now I'm excited to see what you have planned. Looking forward to an update!