You might wanna mark this complete if your not gonna do an epilogue

Cell killed 17 they wished back everyone he killed this wishing 17 back to 16 full robot that he was did not come back

Well like I said in a previous review I was enjoying it up until the last few chapters and especially making gohan run from Tao when he could destroy him with a flick of his finger that was just the most idiotic idea that could ever be conceived

Well I know that this story in incomplete but I was enjoying it so far but the end of this chapter just ruined that for me because it seems you just wanted to create drama between gohan/Videl and 17 for what it just makes no sense. There already too much going on in the story for this to be added into it.

Please update this story. I like it fine, but you are leaving us with too many unanswered questions?

Hey, Kaka here letting you kno that the next update will not be coming anytime soon. Team Dragon Star has decided as a group it is better for us to break apart and work on our solo projects. Many of us have moved past Fanfiction and for some of us, writing in general. I hope you realise that this had not been an easy choice. The account and all it’s stories will stay up for your enjoyment. I hope you understand. Thank you all for supporting us in these last few years. We never would have reached this point without you.

This fic had potential until the end. It really confused me how Tao was even supposed to be a viable threat, and I think Videl was brought down unnecessarily to let Mark shine. Also, Mark seems to have a lot of Gary Stu characteristics, and the plot rotated around him a bit too much for my taste, as I think he's a bit of and a-hole.

I really like this fanfiction, and I have been waiting for an update for a while, because I never realized this was finished since it was never marked as complete.

Good story until Gohan ran away. Consider rewriting so that none of the z-fighters, gohan included see Tao until the end.
All the z-fighter could beat Tao and 17 and 18 being unlimited stamina cyborgs would likely be bullet proof in their sleep. An unprepared Yamcha or Tien might be hit by a bullet if someone needs hit.

"Me. Piccolo must have rubbed off on him."
Oh boy did that make me crack up. Ever seen Dragon Ball Abridged? DODGE! XD

The story was pretty good until it went stupid one or two chapters back. Especially this last one, with Gohan running away when he should just deal with the 'problem' in a fraction of a second. Seriously, the enemy was no real threat at all. Seventeen dying to a lucky shot, was just as bad. And don't get me started on Videl and Seventeen kissing.. that felt so out of place.

Too bad that this otherwise good story had to end like this.

This story...where to start, hmm?

#1: This "Mark Satan" character. Not only is Hercule's actual name "Mark" (should have chosen a different name, guys), he's a Godforsaken Marty Stu.

Related to an already established character? Check.
Good at everything with no particular reasoning? Check.
Story revolves around him? Check.
Picks up new skills lightning fast? Check.
Tries to be badass, sounds like a condescending asshole instead? Check.

#2: You've taken Videl's achievements and ability away from her for no real reason. In canon, she learned to use Ki and learned how to fly in about two weeks. In this story, she seems to have trouble with both (having not learned either in three months), in addition to being essentially curb-stomped by her brother every time they fight. Losing a fight against Gohan is fine, losing a fight against Sharpner of all people is not.

#3: There were jumps in the middle of chapters that made absolutely no sense. Chapter 27, for example: One minute Tao was cutting Seventeen apart, and in the very next scene he's back to talking to Hercule mentioning this (with no mention of a cell phone or flight or anything), then apparently teleports back to the forest just to run all the way back to the city? What?

#4: Why did Gohan run? As soon as he saw Tao, he should have recognized him from the ten days before the Cell Games. Even if he didn't, he should have stomped Tao the very instant Seventeen was brought down. No teacher worth their salt uses their students as *bait* in order to run away, regardless of what the student wants. In fact, what he did to Tao at the end was something he *should have done at the start.* Gohan had MORE than enough time.

#5: Chapter 27 was just...what.
Don't worry, Seventeen's fine! I mean, Sharpner's dead, as well as a few unnamed students of the Son Dojo, and Krillin just kinda let Tao do it. Erasa's gonna walk with a limp the rest of her life as well, but hey, it's not all bad! I mean, Gohan finally did Tao in by...crushing his throat and dropping him off a building. In the single most anti-climactic death in the story. Granted that Tao isn't any kind of threat to Gohan in any way, shape or form, but Tao should have been offed at the *start* of the chapter, see #4.

In addition, Mark was being an insensitive asshole telling Videl to "man up" (Sharpner JUST died and is lying on the floor, still fucking warm from the gunshot not ten minutes before). Mark ALSO has a massive hole in his side and is playing it off like he's not injured at all.

Granted, this is 2 years later without any sort of epilogue posted to tie things up, but Christ. At best, this is a story with completely OOC characters. At worst? A disorganized mess with a Marty Stu OC leading the pack.

Not the worst story I've read, but far from one of the best.

I'm not a big Hercule Satan fan but the level he goes to here feels really OOC. I'm not knocking the choice tho, he makes a good villain especially with the low stakes (relative to DB's main story) and the family dynamic going on.

Thank you for the read!

J'aime beaucoup ton histoire.

I remember reading this story when the first chapter came out so many years ago and thought it was a neat concept. On the other hand, i am a stickler for the canon which is why i may have more problems with this story and the direction it took. However, i am glad to say that i did enjoy it near the end though some things just don't quite make sense to me; Tao could maybe get off one attack via surprise, but anything else seems unlikely to me since it's been shown tat the z fighters can all move faster than sound. In other words, i don't think Tao should've been able to hurt as many people as he did. I also hope gohan and videl get more attention for the remainder of the story as it feels like they don't get much interaction after the initial training (alot of which just felt like ground work for the initial attraction). Gohan/Videl is by far my favorite pairing and i look forward to more works from you guys in the future!