Whoa...Let me tell you, I didn't expect this to be a well written story. Everything was spot on; the characterizations, the setting, the way how you portrayed Drosselmeyer to be such a jerk. I swear, it's like you're a descendant of his because you spun this tale so well. I thought I was going to be denied a good read because of the OC's, but surprisingly, even though it's been six chapters, I can see that there is much love and chemistry between the both of them.

And you're right, Luisa seems to be the perfect combination of Fakir and Duck. James, on the other hand, seems to be a bit of a playboy slash cool kid persona, but it works. Not only was I astounded by your writing, I was greatly surprised by the characters that you used.

You have no idea how much I smiled when I realized that Mytho and Rue visited their old friends. (I kind of wished to see Autor's face when he saw that Rue was back because they kind of had a thing going on...XD). Nevertheless, this was a beautiful story that was made even better by the presence of the parents. Drosselmeyer can go die, but that's the main point of this little novella, it's to finally put the old geezer to rest. (By the way, I loved how you referred to him as an old fossil numerous times throughout the story.)

Finally, I loved the ending. It was ambiguous to say the least because of the whole Rapunzel thing because I want to know what their reactions were. Whether they actually had a happy marriage because Luisa's and James' relationship seemed to be Romeo-and-Juliet-esque because they have been seeing each other for less than a year. Then again, true and love and destiny...

Then again, that seems to be my only problems with this story; teenagers getting married and the fact that it was short. I would like to see how Luisa was brought up. (I wonder how Drosselmeyer felt when he had to deal with puberty...) Which leads to another question that I have been meaning to ask, when Luisa went against him, she went all out...It was like she held no affection for him. True, you once mentioned that he sat close to her and she felt something uneasy, but other than that...I felt that you needed to expand on their relationship more-I hate to compare it to Disney, but I saw a lot more interaction between Gothel and Rapeunzel, which was a lot more explained in depth than in here. Then again, Drosselmeyer is a guy, so Luisa wouldn't bond that much but still. I expected something like an emotional wall that she had to jump over because this was basically her father that she was killing even though she was kidnapped.

To me, I think that would have been heartbreaking and ten times more powerful, but I understand.

Thanks for providing this story to those who want to be graced by well written works of art.

Again, are you a descendant of Drosselmeyer? Because that would explain a lot.

:)

I love this story!:-)

well... day-um. drossle is an ass, isn't he? And this story is totally awesome! write on!

Quite a good story :)

What A Brilliant Ending! Tied Everything Up Swiftly smoothly and perfectly :D

i cryed at the beginning for poor ahiru and now im glad everything will be ok

Oh You had me tearing up!That part when Fakir and Ahiru heard Luisa was alive oh i wanted to cry :')

Ow...Get your eyes pecked out isnt fun ._.

ACK! excitement! I cannot wait for the final chapter!

It's so enthralling! But even though i know it's about their KID, I wanna see more Fakir and Duck...

NOOOOOOOOOO

...Creepy, and Cool. The plot is more and more of should seen it coming but I didn't. Meh, as long as I didn't see it, it's exciting. My picture James and Luisa turned out well, except I didn't know if Luisa's dress was supposed to be fancy or not. I didn't think it was, so I drew it kinda plain-ish. Also, Luisa's hair probably isn't nearly long enough. I didn't know where to post it so I'm going to put it on deviantart after I get an account in the next month or two. I was wondering when James and Luisa would make that "little" connection of their parents. Geez, they were completely oblivious to it until it hit them like a ton of bricks. It seems like the story is really going to go nutz next chapter. I'll be patiently awaiting the posting of it! :D

You definitely should be proud of this one. It's wonderful and emotionally gripping.

i love this chapter! you did a great job! i can't wait to see what happens next! :-)

I see, you're proud of a rather fluffy chapter... but this was okay to me for some reason, despite the fluff. I think that Luisa was alot more likeable this chapter, and James is still really a great character. The only problem I have with this story would be the slow updates, but If you're anthing like me you can only get on a computer once or twice a week, if that. The reason I have left so many reviews everywhere is because I use my DSi. But anyway, I think I want to draw either James or Luisa now. Oh to heck with it I'll draw both. Next time you update this I'll leave a link to it. Can't wait for the next chapter! :D

this is a great story!