Okay, I won't deny that I enjoyed this story. Your plot was interesting from beginning to end, and I loved how this story was set up. I don't see supernatural creatures mixing well with D. Gray-Man characters, but this worked. However, I do have my criticisms.

First off, the way the chapters were broken apart was kind of daunting. I would have preferred you put in line breaks then describe the new scene before us. It gives us the same effect your going for. At smaller sections, such as when the Noahs attacked the Great Families, I would have recommended putting them together in the same section.

Also, you have this tendency to repeat yourself. Forexample, in Chapter 11 (I think), Kanda is having fun by kissing Allen and teasing him senseless. You asked a question on how far Kanda would take it, you answered it by saying: "He can wait," before saying that kissing the Moyashi senseless seemed like fun (or something along those lines). THEN you had Kanda thinking: "This is gonna be fun..." To me, as a writer, this just seemed completely unnecessary. I already know that Kanda's amused and is going to take joy in teasing Allen, I don't need his thoughts to tell me that.

Also...your paragraphing kind of bothers me. The longer ones are fine, but the way you seem to always hit the enter key after someone says something, write a single line of detail, press the enter key again, then have that same person speak again...that's not good paragraphing, I'm sorry. You should have kept the detail and that same person's dialogue all in the same paragraph.

On that note, once I got to Chapter 10 and more and more characters were introduced, I started losing track of people when they were talking. Who was speaking when, who were they in the story, so on and so forth.

Finally, the biggest thing I need to advise you of: Don't put Author's Notes in the middle of your chapters! Your writing is actually very immersive, so whenever I saw an A/N, I got upset. You don't see author's notes in the middle of books while the story is being told, it ruins the effect that a good story is supposed to give someone. For example, when Tyki and Neah are talking to each other in code, I would have preferred you saying in the story something like: "To those who might pass them, their words would seem like nothing more than a family discussion. However, the brothers knew that their words had different meanings here." That would have been a lot better than the author's note telling me the translation to the code was in bold.

Again, I really enjoyed your story, and I think you're a good writer. But I also think you have the ability to be a great one.

~ K. Fang-sama

hello! I started reading this after it's completion. I absolutely adored it! Seriously. I highly appreciated the minimal spelling errors as it made reading more enjoyable. I sometimes tend to dislike OCs but yours were well placed in the story. I also really liked how the DGM characters were mainly IC most of the time. To be honest I mainly came for the Yullen (thanks for including a lemon XD) but I still enjoyed or didn't mind most of the other pairings because of how nicely you put them together. I seriously loved how you made like 3 Yullen pairings using the ancestors yet still making each pairing its own thing. I adored the plot as well and I'm happy with what you did with the Noah family in the end~
Congrats for getting through my my fangirling (I am a girl I remember you asked at the end of the mock awards

Cross... is scared of Cats? ...* grins evily* I've got some blackmail now...
mwahahahahaha

I didn't ship all of the ships, but you put them together beautifully. This was a wonderful fanfic, and I commend you on your writing. Keep it up!

woah! That was one hell of a story! I love Lavi's antics at the begining of the story. That "Whoot! Allen's a jedi!" and that "The Goddamn Batman" really had me laughing my ass of! Ahaha!

Oh! Rascal! You're so cute! Ahaha! You're not really overpowering the other characters. Well, maybe a little, sometimes. But it's alright. You have an important role to the story.

It's really one funny and awesome fanfiction. Even the author's notes are funny to read (pointing that i don't really read a/n from the previous stories that I've read). Cold and Solarius just added to the fun!

Well. I think that's long enough. Can't really type all my thoughts here in one go Because it'll be too long.

Ah yeah. I first finished reading this fic before writing this review. Hehe. More power to you Lunny!

See, this is why I don't read ongoing's if I can help it.

I liked it. There were misspellings and grammatical errors abs sometimes I got lost in your explanations but overall I liked the story. Good job

AWESOME STORY! Sequel!

Okay, i just got to say this to you. *Suck in deep breathe*
THIS IS LIKE SERIOUSLY 1 OF THE MOST HILARIOUS AND (probably) 1 IF THE GREATEST STORY I EVERY READ!
I seriously laughed through the whole chapters! Your humor is simply brilliant, I LOVE IT! Especially the interactions between the Kandas and the Walkers! XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
And i especially love your oc here, mostly Rascal and Morte. Cats are forever amusing to say the least.

Listening to the last 50 seconds of pocahontas During the part where the others are comforting allen in their own ways made it more touching in my opinion

wow I love Kanda here
how he desired allen so cute _
I like how you wrote relo here
and also tarsus
so cute!
sorry I am too lazy I don't wanna log in

it was so nice that you've put Alma here I really really love him so much
Poor allen-chan

wow wow wow
that was a very cute start I really like it since
I like things like these specially
Fantasy supernatural and CATS!
love this first chapter I'll keep on reviewing!

I enjoyed this fan fiction so much! I feel like so much time has passed since i started reading it because the characters were so different in the beginning. We got to see them change and devolop! I'm looking back now remembering Allen being afraid of the fact that the school was in innocence Valley and even the parade seems like forever ago. I think I started reading this yesterday yet it feels like I actually lived their lives with them. You my dear are a wonderful writer! The only time I wasn't hyped up and excited was at the end with all of the kids and stuff. We went from a major battle and what not to that.. I love kids so much.. I needed to be calmed down it was a wonderful peaceful ending! Thank you for writing this!

I LOVE RASCAL