Reviews for The winging of Miya |
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![]() ![]() ![]() find myself going through this again. still a really nice story. fluff you may call it, but it's will done to the end. that in itself winds an award. the story too for a second one. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Very nice and great ending |
![]() ![]() ![]() Sweet |
![]() ![]() ![]() Thrilling chapter |
![]() ![]() ![]() wow |
![]() ![]() ![]() cool |
![]() ![]() ![]() great start |
![]() ![]() ![]() Interesting story. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I really liked this. It was sweet...also the idea that everything was a Domino effect was brilliant. Minaka isn't evil he was driven insane the very moment he entered the ship so many years ago and everything after that was a result of his instability. |
![]() ![]() Are you cereal?! AKITSU, TOO?! THAT'S IT! *gleefully begins grabbing and throwing things, stomping all around while screaming happily, repeatedly smashing my face into a wall making a nice and bloody indentation* This. Fic. Is. AWESOME! |
![]() ![]() YES! Miya/Minato! And I could actually see this happening! This is excellent! |
![]() ![]() Manaka - Minaka You got his name wrong |
![]() ![]() ![]() Sorry you're done, liked the story. By the way, Katsuragi is #86, not #83 |
![]() ![]() I really liked this. Nicely done. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Not bad. While I enjoyed the story as a whole, and a lot of the ideas you put into play I had wondered about even before finding the fanfiction website. Your composition, to me at least, leaves a bit to be desired. It runs far to fast, and if described, narrated, and dialoged PROPERLY the story could have easily gone 10-15 chapters, and been. Inch easier to read. Instead it feels more rushed. Punctuation, it needs fixing. To many commas, semi colons, etc I can get by if used wrong or too far in abundance. I think most readers could also... HOWEVER. Exclamations and question marks make the dialog so much more in the internal mind when it's being read. I certainly like the maturing bit that you put forth, there is a lot in the series to suggest the sekerei are aged, prematurely I think, look at shiina and Ku, at least 4-6 years difference, of not more as Yukari would have been 17-18, a year younger than Minato... But they where batched together? Musubi's simple ness I usually put down to carrying yume's tama/consciousness, as well as her own. Essentially making her work twice as hard to maintain concentration... Anyways, you done good. Hope you consider a sequel to theism, but your profile hasn't been updated since 2010... |