One of my favourite fanficts!

Okay. Wow.

Your English is good, man. And knowing you're from the same country as i am didn't help, either.

So cute! So pure-which I guess is weird coming from me. (feet shuffling) A progressing love story: simple friends becoming something more naturally. The simplicity is novel in its own way. Like how something small and innocuous to one person can be the most important thing in the world to someone else.

I'm only guessing-English isn't your first or only language. Indonesia, right? So, I'm not complaining. Just advising. I think you should get a GOOD beta-someone experienced who can teach you instead of just cleaning your work. Why? Because there are too many tense errors to be typos. Not laziness, just a lack of know-how.

I'd like to see more dialog because you write them so sweetly.

Cute~ except you make some words plural when it shouldn't be.

/"Naturally, since you always copied my works."/

It should be "work"

Anyways keep it up

GD

xx

this is just so sweet.

kept going "awwwwww" all through chapters 1-4.

looking forward to more. 3

your story is absolutely adorable!...

...but you should get a beta-reader to check your grammar.

"Asano-kun! I happened to like you too! And everybody in this class. And in this town too!"

Oh man, that seriously cracked me up.

aww! Little Ichi is worried about Rukia.

And I LOVE Ukitake: "Strawberry sweets, Rukia? I know you're fond of them." of COURSE she would love them xD

awesome chapter, can't wait for the next one

There were a lot of great moments here:

/Strawberry sweets, Rukia? I know you're fond of them./ lmao - awesome!

/A change of view since they say that a body of dead cat was found on the spot they usually hang for lunch breaks. Rukia silently hoped that it wasn't Yoruichi mistaking foods with pest poisonous food trap as her cat nips./

Great picture lol

/nd mine for ever and ever and ev…"

"HEAD LOCK!"/

Okay I'm smiling like an idiot now!

/Being caught of guard/

Off guard?

/Yeah rite./

Yeah right?

/Holy mother of Menos../

LMAO~

/What happened! Did she got attacked? In the Bathroom? Goodness gracious! Hollow? Kon? CCTV camera her father secretly installed?/

HAHAHAHAHAH

/"Ichigo, I think the shower is broken. And I have shampoo in my eyes…"/

omg that's so cute - Ichigo should wipe her tears away and make mad love to her! *giggles*

/"I couldn't say Thank You any better than this."/

I would avoid capitalizing necessarily. If you want to make thank you stand out, use italics or ' ' marks.

/A weird sort of goofy laugh escaped his lips and didn't subdue until Rukia was beside him again./

A goofy smile is on my face!

Good job on the chapter. I'd like the yogurt with blueberries and strawberries please! I hope you don't mind me erm, bringing up the little mistakes. S I don't even think /Yuzu's Orange shampoo on the room/ Orange should be capitalized here... Perhaps in the future change it to, 'orange-scented' shampoo?

All in all I enjoyed this VERY much. The last part of the chapter gave me a good idea for my story... ) Thank you and keep up the good work!

GD

xx

Oh I just absolutely adore the pair! *insert fangirl squeal* So 'innocent'. HAHA! Poor Rukia, shampoo in her eyes...

I can't wait for the next update!

Yum, yogurt with mango slices... My absolute favourite.

P.S. I enjoy apple pie too! *winks suggestively* (you know what I mean right?) haha! :)

OH MY! haha! We get to see possesive Ichigo, protective Ichigo and considerate Ichigo all in one chap.! This is wonderful! I take my hat to you!

WHAT! 13 reviews only! What an outrage, no! You deserve more. So, anyways. I love the last part where Ichigo finds Rukia taking refuge in the tree, haha and the horrible beating Keigo was practically begging for for ruining the moment

i love this story!

the little plot u come up with are well written and i enjoy reading them, so i dont mind waiting a little while for them :)

Awh! That's so cute! The smile thing, where they have their own "world", Haha! I liked it, it was cute. Haha! Shampoo in her eyes? Oh dear! That sucks, yeah, I'd cry too. XD But Ichigo willing to go after whoever "hurt" her was nice! Ah haha! This was way funny, I liked it! (such as said, but I figure I can say it twice for this chapter) :D

Oh yeay! Free buffet! Mm... Yougurt with whatever I want? Okay, than I want everything. A teaspoon of yougurt with everything. Including those waffles, the waffle iron, all the syrups,and the burning ciggeret because someone has to take it, might as well me me. -sigh- That is so not going to be fun to swallow... o.O

Haha!

Well this is superr cute! I like these situations and one-shots in a one-shot ;) Your writing is also easy to follow so its a plus!

Keep writing

GD

xx