I really like this story but I did notice the use of the word "retard" when describing the party. This is an extremely offensive term to a lot of people. It is a very derogatory term for people with disabilities and implies that people with disabilities are not equal to people without. I understand that you were trying to portray Adrian's thoughts but there are many words that get the point across. I am not meaning this to be an attack on you, I just assume that you just did not realize how offensive this term can be. Many people do not and I feel that the only way they ever will is if someone tells them.

You should do the scene where Rose asks Adrian to compel him to kiss her.

I think you should have Adrian Dream-Walk Dimitri

Now THAT would be funny

LOL you did great with this one, I loved it when he used compulsion on Jesse and Ralf, but isn't two GUYS calling him Mr. Hot Sexy Studmuffin(LMAO) kinda queer?

That was not suckish! You are the GOD of adrians pov. I was actually laughing my fucking ass off, my sister came into the room and stared at me like I was stupid (which I kind of was, she had no idea what I was laughing about) That was exactly what I needed. XDXDXDXDXDXD X3X3X3X3X3X3

So good!

OMG AHAHAHAHAHAH LMFAO CHAPTER 8. FREAKIN LOVE IT SOOOO FUNNY :D AHAHAHAHAH :)

Very interesting & funny! Awesome job!)

HHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAH! :d

cHAPTER 8 IS HILARIOUS!

GOOD JOB!

rose and adrain plz and keep going with the story and rose and adrian should be together

i love how you show Adrian's affectionate and his the smartass attitude i love your writing i love how u have him when his with rose i love how hes in love adrian is like everyone else when hes in love like i said b4 i love u and my man adrian! i want u 2 do some more fanfic

how can it be terrible? "There wasn't much I could do with this chapter" there was a lot you could do with this chapter like when adrian does that age takl i was so out of it but when u did it in APOV i so go it like i said b4 u r my fav fanfic love u

Coz u said "Please please please please with a cherry on the top, review this!" i will review it and this is what i have to say "FUCKING LOVE IT ! how could i Hated it?"

you do adrian so well its so good it like my fav fanfic of adrian! how on earth is this ya 1st fanfiction ?

do some more fanfic i would love to hear more from you

love ya BIG time and ADRIAN

Oh man, I really like this story so far! I feel like you really got Adrian's character and personality down colded! You can't until I see him walk into Rose's dream! :)

bahahaha omg this is so funny i was cracking up hahahaha i looooove it :D hahahaha