Most impresive. I'd like to see what happens next, but as a poem by itself it's very good.

*Whistle* Nice. 'bout time I read some of your work again. The responses suits each character well.

BTW

Where in the name of Chaos did you learn to speak latin!

Well well well now just what do we have here?

An actual story by you that is NOT over 1k of words?

I HAD to read this...

Pretty good...the whole Latin thing at the beginning gave me a headache cuz I didn't know what it meant.

And all those chants and all that...also confused me until, that is, I got to the end and read the names.

I kind of laughed at the Latin part when I read:

"Decorus vixen"

I translated it, from my own mind, to be: Decorated vixen...

Which I made out to be Krystal...I mean isn't it obvious? The vixen part gave it away immediately...

Anyways...I think that whole chanting was pretty cool...something like a pre-war ritual or a pre-war ritual thingy...

I'm on a basketball team and we have a ritual where right before the game we get out on the court and surround each other in a tight circle with our arms wrapped around each others shoulders. Then we rock from one direction to the opposite as a group while slowly rising in volume our voices. Then we finish with a triple: WOO! WOO! RAH!

And then we all put our hands in the middle and the first three to speak count off numbers in triplets and at the end of each triplet the whole team shouts the "tribal code of our team":

ONE! TWO! THREE!

FAMILY!

FOUR! FIVE! SIX!

BROTHERHOD!

SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE!

DO WORK!

So ya...I can see why it would be cool for you...it was pretty cool for me...the adrenaline rushing through my ears and heart.

Well all I can say is...you still got it in you.

After all this time of not reading ANY of your stories...after reading this short one...

I can definitely say sonny, you still got it in you.

Now I done gone have to start putting my faith in your stories again...not that I gave up long ago...nope...I just lost my heart to read...but I have to start some time...hopefully soon...hopefully soon.

Best Wishes and Never Ending Thanks,

Chris

I've been readin your warhammer 40k fanfic since the begining i love em they are an awsome 3 part stroy i hope it is as epic as the last 2

Well, what is there to say other than: Excellent work, GamerJay! :-) A great little appetizer for the sequel to come.

In this litany, you've proved once again that you master the incredibly tough feat of making your characters stand out distinctly from one another in your language, via descriptions of thoughts and mannerisms. This impression of skill is most strikingly conveyed here, as we can easily distinguish the members of Team Star Fox (both human and Lylatian) from one another as the litany progresses. Using this opportunity to illuminate their inner reflections on the challnges they face is also well done!

Another impressive stylistic move, which adds to the atmosphere, is the High Gothic/Latin-part. It perfectly sets the slightly sombre style of the litany in the 41st Millennium.

Apart from that, I couldn't seem to find any grammatical errors, either, so in conclusion, I congratulate you with this little piece and wish you the best of luck with the sequel, which this is surely foreboding. :-)

Sincerely,

SF Ghost.

Pretty cool; if you don't mind me asking, where did you find that latin? Cause I've been trying to find a online latin dictionary for gothic myself.

Can't wait to see the next installment; I'm really hoping that Jac sticks it to Calgar and that Chaplain, whose name I can't remember.