so cool

I'm rereading your Gen13 stories for the fourth or fifth time, and this one line from this chapter never fails to hit me like a sledgehammer:

"And I'd still be there, just another castoff, staring up at the shadows with dust on my eyes."

The world needs more writers who can make me tear up like this.

THAT was very long for a first chapter. Anyway, I hope I can read more!

I love your depiction of Anna, and am thoroughly enjoying your version of Gen 13. I'm hooked and will be reading straight through the weekend.

Wow. So, I've never read Gen13. Never heard of them. And I just devoured your whole Anna the Caterpillar story and LOVED it. I cannot believe it has so few reviews-your writing is perfect and the characters are so believable even with the scifi... and I lurve Anna.

A very nice introduction to your stories. The first story you wrote would probably have served better as a prologue for this one; I wasn't sure of anything in that one and it was fairly confusing. However, if I re-read it now, it would probably make a lot of sense now.

You've defined the beginning characters fairly well; and the narrative is becoming interesting. I hope that you'll keep more mystery around your "scarred man" hanging around as long as possible.

The timeline seems a bit skewed however; two years Oo? I'm sure you have your reasons (and that they'll probably be realistic and plausible within this universe, against all tradition of comic books). I enjoyed the reference to the 21-foot rule, where even with his Gen powers, Jack wouldn't be able to draw his S&W before Anna would tear him apart. Maybe a 100-foot rule for police standing against killer robots :P?

I enjoyed the story immensely.

Bobby's song, Eddie and Anna. Laughed forever.

Don't ya just hate it when you spend about a half an hour writing a review and then you hit some odd ball key and the review gets erased? How am I back on Anna the Caterpillar when I was just on Lab Ratz? I just might be in Roxie's maze.

Okay, the kids have arrived, it's been a long day, and it's time to close the forward to continuing the chapter tommorow. Very, very interesting and amusing.

I've quite enjoyed reading this fic - and I'm beginning to get a feel for the characters, not from the comic, but because of the way that you write. Your writing is so fluid and descriptive that it draws you into the story and into the minds of the characters.

Oh

My

GOD!

I SO wish I was rich. I would buy the rights to Gen-13 and let you have at it. This was completely AWESOME!

Diving back in for more. T

Very nice. My familiarity with Gen13 is pretty limited -I'm a casual comic fan at the best of times- but this was easy to get into and follow.

The focus on Anna is a nice touch. My understanding is that she was a minor character in the first run of the series, despite being the live-in battledroid housekeeper. One Crowning Moment of Awesome rescuing the kids from a group of Genactive kidnappers, while kicking nine kinds of butt in the process, another right before she goes up with the house (which appears to be hinted at towards the end of this piece), and not a lot of character development overall. You've managed to turn that around and make her interesting in all sorts of ways that have nothing to do with guns-blazing combat. The question of how an android with superhuman senses would perceive the world is just one example; her "mom vibe" is another.

The other canon characters all seem to be right in terms of personality. Points for Grunge being smart and/or cultured in his own way and time, without losing his laid-back hormonal caveman charm.

Side note: I want to say that the term "grok" comes from Heinlein's Stranger In a Strange Land, but it's been a while since I read it last. Am I right?

I like your take on the escape from the Genesis Project better than what I recall of the incident in canon. Lynch singlehandedly storming a "hyper-max" facility with a gun and his freaky mojo just strikes me as more believeable than the five kids being actively aided in an escape by Threshold, even if he did later lead four of them into going back and getting caught. The expansion of the ranks of the Thirteens was also nice; it leaves far more open territory for later stories and is again a bit less overtly comic-bookish than having them all divvied up into teams.

More points for Roxy's perspective on the breakout; her interactions with Lynch were fun. Here's this pixie-sized punk who just met a big scary guy that can kill people by looking at them funny, and not twenty minutes later, she's sewing him up where he got stabbed -and then browbeating him into letting her remove the stitches a few days later.

I figure that's about enough out of me for now. I'll probably get around to reviews for the subsequent stories in the next week or two. Until then.