Ok, you got Harry to Amber. That’s good.

But you missed a bet here. It might have been better to keep Moldy-shorts’ soul-fragment in place a bit longer so Fiona, Bleys, and possibly Dworkin and Oberon would have noticed it (Like I said earlier, Magic DOES work in Amber). I’m not saying that the soul-fragment would have to stay there: I suspect that having Harry/Harden walk the Pattern would have done a fine job of excising and destroying it.

You haven’t done an update in years, so I presume that you abandoned this story. I would add that if either Random and Corwin learned that Moldy- shorts killed their kid, there would have been at least two, and probably more, Princes and Princesses of Amber making an excursion to shadow-Earth to take vengeance.

I’m glad this is an old story, because I’m going to be mean. Magic DOES work in Amber, and if you’d taken note of Corwin’s interactions with Bleys and Fiona, you’d know it. Also, Corwin’s escape from the dungeon at the end of the book is magically powered.

This critique is over a decade too late, but I don’t think that even the still-arrogant, pre-amnesiac, pre-exile Corwin soul have pulled out the cutlery this early.

I just found this fanfiction. Interesting premise. No wonder Petunia was primed to hate Lily! The Hogwarts letter was only the spark.

Gerard for sure. Very early indeed if King is there.
Good play on words seriously random it was...

Okay. Julian is somewhat in character. Corwin is from left field. None of the best mate to have nezt to you in battle Corwin ... okay to share convern about family intrigue but maybe better done if he moved them to a closer shadown to Amber, then laid his cards on the table, motive for stopping by for "Lily" ( as in knowing was already dead ). Lot of plot pieces and Corwin depth of character being missed or skipped.

Very curious how Harry will react to Bleys. I hope at least that Bleys will get Harry more comfortable - he's known to be charming.

bon début! et?

Why do you have Corwin acting so OOC now?

We must have read different series perhaps.

Because in the one I remember Corwin was not such an Ass hole.

I think that the people are Flora(the blonde), Benedict is the man in armor. I would think that Deirdre is the brown haired woman except that she has black hair. The "bear of a man" is probably Gerard. I love your story, please update soon!

Lol harry is going 4o have to pull a prank or two on random

very nice story. I like it and look forward to more.

Ive never read the Chronicles of Amber, but I am still enjoying this story. I may even have to read the series because it sounds really interesting. I hope you get back to writing this story soon.

- SugarQuill

I really really hope you pick this story up again. I first read the Amber Series in Collage in the 80's, And then in the last few years John Betancourt started a series of Amber books that are the pre history of it all. So please do update :)

It's kind of an ok fic. Almost. Maybe.

Harden is totally not the kind of name I would like Harry to have...

Nauro.