Don't quit writing. Flex your writing muscles. Go back to this film and dissect Annie and Marcus. Use the "review" part of Microsoft Word (If that's what you use to write) and check punctuation.

Some of my Fanfic was so poorly edited, one reviewer asked if I spoke English. Some reviewers were damn rude. Me, I, won't do this to you.

Get a Beta reader who will be fresh eyes. KEEP writing. I want to hear more about your ideas on The Invisible.

Yes, we like it. Pretty much. She deserves to live no matter what she did. Nick will forgive her. he already have and her boyfriend.. she had to protect herself. No that it is a justification to kill, but anyway it's the survivind instinct that can't be controled and I guess it's hard to think clearly enough to just immobilized your adversary and not to hit the wrong point and kill them.

Nice story you got here! :)

Yeah I didn't like how Annie died in the end either, I was hoping she would find a way to save him and then they would end up together :/

I really like how you wrote Annie's thoughts in here, though, it's darn-near canon :D

Your story is pretty good I like it you right pretty good keep up the good work and one day you might make it to the top with all the other famous people.

Remember "Just because you know someone's name doesn't mean you know there story."

I don't want to criticise this, i want to say that this is... awesome. Waiting for the next part!

She should be able to talk to Nick. The difficulty is she would need immediate medical attention. She wouldn't exactly have much time. She's not really in a position to decide. If you continue it needs to be possible for her to live. It's an interesting concept but she just doesn't have the amount of time.

I'm not necessarily opposed to the idea of Annie taking Nick's place in "Limbo", but there has to be a reason she stays instead of moving on. It's all about consistency- being true to the original themes and concepts. Nick's lay-over between life and death and his return to the living world could, theoretically, have been fate. He was so down on his life despite that his life wasn't so terrible. Being able to hang post around post-death allowed him to see the people in his life from a new perspective. He emerged back into the living world with a new appreciation for his mother, his life and everyone in it- even Victor, Annie's kid brother who he never even met until the very last scene. Nick didn't die because it wasn't his time.

That said, it's most likely that Nick's brush with death was really never meant to be the end of him at all- it was more like life's way of open his eyes. He didn't die because it wasn't his time.

The same can be said about Annie. To remain true to Annie's character as well as to the message this film, Annie would need to have an equally powerful motivation for staying with our world rather then moving on. Perhaps to protect someone she loves from impending disaster, or because- despite her journey with Nick- she still has unfinished business to attend to.

keep going!

Oh, this is one of my favorite movies/books. I didn't like how the movie ended either. (The book was different but I also didn't like that ending.)

Anyway, I'd really like to see where you take this :)

Holy crap there's an "Invisible" category now! I'm so excited! when did this happen! It always bugged me that there weren't a lot of fics out there, it's nice to know it's got its own category now!

Haha, anyways, I really liked this piece. I hope you intend to continue this, because it seems like it might be a very strong piece. One thing that bugs me about the fanfic world nowadays is that it seems like all the old amazing writers are gone, grown up I guess, and left the reigns to the undeserving teenybops who don't know what good writing is.

I'm always afraid to read fics now for fear of being severly disappointed (I always love it when summaries are full of IM speak and bad grammar)but this one did not have that air at all, and I was pleasantly surprised. Very refreshing to know that there are some out there who at least have an inkling of what they are doing. It was unfortunately very short, but to the point with the right amount of depth to it.

It'll be interesting to see where you go with it and how you expand on what you've presented here. Personally, I always found Annie's homelife and relationship with Marcus very intriguing because nothing is directly stated, but they give us enough hints to make us question what's going on in the background so it might be interesting to expand on some of these. Like why her father left the force, what he's done to make her threaten him for her brother's sake, and where Annie got those bruises on her arm (shown right before the shower scene and again when she's laying in the gym).

And also what attracts her to Marcus in the first place. I always got the impression that he really did care for her, but he didn't know how to deal with her and her actions (after all, she was way out of control). So yeah. Didn't mean to write a novel here XD but just throwing some ideas out. I really do hope you continue this though!

~Cat

totally continue. i think it has a lot of potential. good luck. i'll keep reading

Not a bad start, for your first fanfic. I don't even like to think about my first fanfics. I have to agree, I didn't like how they ended the movie either, although in a way, Annie almost had to die. You should continue it.

Write more. Oh please write more, The Invisible fan fics are hard to come by, and yours seems great!

i really hope you continue...i like it...its very different from the rest but in a very good way!

Aww it doesnt suck, this was really well written for your first fic! :D I liked the movie the movie Invisible - Justin Chatwin (Nick) was VERY hot! ;D I remember him from "WAR OF THE WORLDS". Loved it!