Great job on this. I really enjoyed how the poem went with the story. I can see Don dreaming about being the one to rescue his father and saving the day. I loved his last line at the end. Nicely done.

The Bubbly One,

Shell

An excellant incorporation of the poem into this wonderful story. Beautiful descriptions of the battle and Donnie's triumph over the monster. I love how he becomes the hero and saves his father from the monster.

/Don thought of the adventures he’d experienced each time Sensei had read it to him. He thought of the fear, and the joy, and the bravery, and the skill, and the sheer excitement of defeating this creature and rescuing his beloved father./

Nothing could possibly be better than a child's imagination. Especially our favourite turtle-tot genius.

Not only have you taken my favourite poem and turned it into a TMNT fanfiction but the main character is also my favourite turtle! The story itself was very well written and very well paced. Sorry I can't think of any helpful advice! I can't wait to read more of your stories, in fact... [rushes off to see if the author has written anything else!] I promise I'll review if I find something I like!

katiesmeghead (georgia - just don't ask!)

O, a little Alice cross over with TMNT. I like it. And it was so sweet.

Now I wanna go check the other story.

aww, that's so sweet! i'm listening to tchaikovsky right now, a kind of fast melody that brings the thoughts to adventures, and it really fits with the story.

AW! That's such a KAWAII fic!

"Leo would be proud of me"

So cute...

Chibi Donnie is so kawaii! I'd just like to...squish his head! Err...well, mebbe just huggle him instead.

*Steals Chibi Donnie from pacphys and huggles him*

A feverish Don falling in love and wonderful dreams of protecting his father, who is taking such care of him. A sweet story and a great way of working The Jabberwocky into it.

Loved the descriptive use of the whistling tea kettle, Don drinking the bad tasting tea, the junkyard, wonderfully told.

The love of nonsense words that appeal to a child.

I myself used the jabberwocky poem some time ago in my story of The Reluctant Student, meant to be a one shot but it grows now and again.

The Jabberwock does inspire though and we must take inspiration where it comes.

Another thing that might be prudent to add in the disclaimer is that Jabberwocky is in the public domain.

This sounds like a dream.

"Leo would be proud of me" LOL! Too cute!

Aw, that is such a sweet little story! Oh! So adorable! *huggles chibi-Donnie* And wonderful little father-son chat there at the end. sO CUTE!

Cheers,

~pacphys~

LOL aw...DOnnie likes the nonsense words. Now I have to reevaluate my son's love of the poem. Maybe he's picturing rescuing me from the evil jaws of...of...hmm...I'll have to ask him.

I must say that despite our talk, I really thought Donnie was in the junk yard with Splinter playing "hero" and not that it was the fever dream of a sick lil turtle.

Ah the joys of rocking children to sleep when sick. Those nights never seem to end for some reason. Probably because they dont, they just run into morning.

Glad my kids inspire others...other than me that is :)

SWEET! Really sweet.

I really liked the turn you gave to the story and the ending..

I do too like the nonsense words... ;) V.

Sweet Fanfic Cyn.

Itd be like Donno to like the funky words...

maybe that's where his technobabble expertise stems from ...yea whateverr

Very nice story. Loved it. A bit rough about half-way through, but overall it was very well written. I loved the beginning where the 'junkyard' begins to change. Very imaginative! Then, the descriptie 'teakettle scream' rivited me! I could 'hear' it very well. However, my teakettle at home sounds like a train whistle, especially when I play with the spout lever! LOL Very fun to do. But, then, my husband usually comments about sending me off with the guys in the white suits. Ah well.,.

Moving right along, as the story winds down to the end and as you part the veil of Don's fever-induced dream, all the components of your story come into play - Splinter's teakettle, the steam, Don's flu-like cough, it all made sense.

I should note that, where you introduced the 'cough' into the story, you used it many times - about four - within a brief period, and where another word related to it could have been used. Overusage of words can weaken a story. 'Hacking' is a word likening to the word 'coughing'. Just a little FYI from ME. LOL I use wordsmyth dot com for broadening my verbiage in my stories and to avoid - at least in trying - redundancy. This doesn't mean that I always succeed, though. :0)

Nevertheless, this was very well done.

I might add that Kellie Fay wrote a story just before this one, titled Jabbermikey, for Stealthy Stories. It's a bit different and very funny. I just found it interesting that a simliarily titled story would find its way onto Fan Fiction. I know that Lewis Carroll's works are public domain and - so - are fine to use in this forum. So, for those 'reviewers' that 'patrol' Fan Fiction to alert the 'powers that be' about 'abuse', be forewarned that Mr. Carroll's works are ours to use as we see fit due to the 'public domain' label. I doubt any of us would tarnish this talented man's writings anyway. Such an imaginitive mind had he. :0)

Just the same, your story was nicely done!

Be blessed,

Rene'

Very well writen and the idea was good to.

It's kind of picking fun of Jabberwocky.

Aw... I Love the changes you made. Your descriptions are improving with every story. ;)

Wonderful Donnie one-shot. I love how Donnie imagines himself the big hero and saving the day. What lil one hasn't had thoughts like this? I just wanna cuddle Donnie... such a brave lil turtle.