This story had me laughing my ass off the entire time. You also may have made one of the greatest versions of Dumbledore, one of the only ones that comes close is the senile Dumbledore from the fic where Harry got Ron to replace him in the tournament.

The tilting of portraits and Harry being clueless about the egg is gold holy shit I’m dying from laughter

Harry don’t breed a basilisk nothing good will come from it
Also yes Hagrid needs a hug many hugs

This has certainly been a fun read. Thus far my favorite chapter was probably the previous one involving the new interview. I did kinda have to look up the Paris Gun. Turns out I was thinking of the Puckle Gun and thus very wrong on what it was. :)

please update immediately

Bon chapitre

A.N.
" ...I haven't revealed the entire wording of the prophecy yet, but it doesn't actually say Dark lord. The wording is more akin to conquerer, or emperor...
((Well, slightly addresses few thoughts of mine, regarding how current tone might get to a "dark lord Potter" path or endpoint.))

... I read some stories when dragon was killed by using explosives or Muggle firearms. I don't remember the stories of dragon slain by poison gas.

Response:

Bitching! I'm always happy to learn I wrote something original. Feel free to let us in on the stories you read where dragons had to be taken down with conventional weaponry...
((Read many. None were memorable enough to recall story titles. Few were Harry on own. Maybe more with Sirius &/or Remus helping. Lol, now I'm recalling author who was fine with their trope*** I likely criticised.

*** that trope they thought was fine, flawless and brill.
Of Harry simply doing an OTP engorgio on the toy dragon, so much much so, the toy was bigger and more powerful than the actual dragon he faced. He beat the dragon with the toy.))

...I have most of my stories outlined at least 12 ... ... stories that I'm writing by the seat of my pants, without an outline, and holy fuck are they fun!"

((( While perhaps upping risk of amateur authors' work being abandoned or on long hiatus. I think amateurs launching on a muse without a plan, that at least for part of the ride, the seat of pants method might percentage wise, have a greater chance of those fics being more captivating tales, even if they might be less likely to be completed. )))

Among the amusing semi one liner zingers:

Christmas and birthday present comprised of potted plants. It would be a long game, but Harry was sure he could pull it off.

could have passed for Lucius Malfoy and Professor Trelawney's anorexic bastard son piped up.

While the prior sexual "terrors" tormenting Harry pushed the incredulity envelope.
I think this chapter walked a decent tightrope with the more visible Harry with backbone, fed up, lashing out, with acidic retorts and sarcasm(silent AND verbalized).
Opposed to plethora of fanfiction with 40 something dialog and discussion among students going on 12.
The character age here(Harry/Sue) gives perfect bandaid for somewhat petulant and emotional bias, attitude, action, interaction etc (one eg. Sue & Harry in owlry).

centurion is a rank in the Roman army. how is dumbles a centurion? I think you might have meant centennial?

Crazy chapter and thanks for sharing!

Aww man this is fucking awesome and I can't wait for more. I always preferred the more unique pairings than standard ones.

Nice love this chapter

Nice

Interesting chapter. Awaiting more.

Ok chapter, though i hope you move the story along.