Reviews for Locked in
Hanz Gewher chapter 1 . 11/19/2018
Looks good so far. Interested to see more.

Name: Andrew Calvin

Gender: Male

Age: 23

Power: Atom Manipulation

Destabilisation(basic projectileShoots a small sharp projectile that destabilises objects on an atomic level.
Matter Grenade: Throws a chunk of unstable atoms that form into large irradiated spikes made from whatever material it impacts.
Piercer: Shoots a large spearhead-like projectile that explodes and destabilises everything in it's radius.
Atomic Breach(meleeForces tons of atoms onto his fingertips that release large amounts of force when touched against something, essentially causing the target to partially explode.
Supernova(Super MoveCreates a singularity in his hands that drags everything around it (except Andrew) towards it before converting it to energy. He then releases the energy which causes a mini supernova.

Traits: A very charismatic and manipulative man, Andrew is good at persuading others into doing his work for him. He can also gain favor with almost anyone by just talking. However, he is also very selfish and cruel and will almost never help others if it didn't benefit him. When capturing a Conduit, he knocks them out and encases their hands in concrete to temporarily nullify their powers (reference my man).

Past: When he was 14, his powers awakened. He was immediately captured and locked up in Curden Cay. However, he was trained to use his powers effectively and lethally. When he reached 18 years of age, he was extended an offer to join the D.U.P., and took it. He now serves as a field captain who hunts down other Conduits.

Family: Miriam Calvin, Mother, Enstranged, Lexham Calvin, Father, Enstranged.

Likes: The rain, talking, hunting other Conduits.

Dislikes: People who resist him, disorder, insubordination.

Outfit: White button up shirt, grey combat pants, black and yellow light overcoat, fingerless Kevlar gloves, black combat boots and a small black and blue earpiece. Also has a silver Rolex on left wrist.

Looks: 5'11, 126 lb. Short, tidy grayish-blonde hair. Sly, pale blue eyes. Generally soft features. Small scar running from his left collarbone to the right side of his jaw. Strong arms and torso, but weaker legs.

Skills: Hand-to-hand combat, agility, accuracy with weapons (despite not needing them)
THAT Guy chapter 3 . 10/18/2018
Name: Alex Marek
Gender: Male
Power: Electricity
Age: 28
Traits: When meeting strangers for the first time, Alex will say little and interact with them as little as possible. But when he does get comfortable after a while he will start to social with them a bit more and more.

Family: All deceased, killed by the beast

Likes: warm weather, anything electrical, following Cole's examples

Dislikes: Water, cold weather, places with no electricity,

Outfit: Pair of blue pants, similar to Cole's, Dark Blue T-shirt with a white hoodie

Looks: Short black hair, blue eyes, tanned skin.

Skills: All of Cole's basic powers
standard bolt
Shock waves
Shock Grenade
Megawatt Hammer
Static Thrusters
Induction Grind
Pulse Heal
Bio-Leeching
Arc-Restraints

Backstory: Seven years ago, Alex was someone you'd probably never notice, just your average person going to work or heading out to get food. But that changed when the beast arrived in his city and blew it to hell. Alex was among the few who survived but changed.

When he finally came to, he found himself in a desolated city, with his body sparking with electricity. He immediately made his way to what was left of his house to check on his family, only to find that they were all dead.

from grief to rage, Alex went out for vengeance, following the beasts trail of destruction and death wherever it went. As he continued to follow Alex would meet newly activated conduits and come across mobs of people who would want him dead because of what he was.

The trail eventually lead him to New Marais, where he was surprised to find the people there had welcomed him with open arms, upon discovering that he was a conduit. He would later find out the beast had been defeated, by another more powerful electric conduit by the name of Cole MacGrath. All over New Marais he would hear heroic tales of Cole, and how he not only killed the beast, but stopped the plague that was sweeping the east coast of the US.

Inspired by Cole, Alex would begin to idolize him and would eventually seek out Zeke Dunbar, who had taught him a few of Cole's tricks and help him become more like the "Patron saint of New Marais."

When the D.U.P. made itself known to the world, Alex left New Marais to help out Conduits who were either captured or normal people who were suspected of being Conduits. Sometimes it would go smoothly other times would be a close call.

Eventually his luck would run out and he would be captured and sent to Curdan cay, where he would sometimes share the tale of his personal hero to other inmates.
Tail-Dei-Dei-Mon chapter 3 . 9/21/2018
Yoho~ I read that you need OC's so I create an OC!

Name: Lea Fitriani (Leaf)
Gender: Female
Age: 24
Power: Plant Manipulation; she can manipulate plants and it's parts, like, bark, branch, flower, vines, leaf, etc.

Speed-up Grow: She can speed the growing of plants in the matter of minutes, and growing plants that didn't there at first, as long as theres chance that plants can grow in there.
Vines Traps: She controls vines and uses this to traps her enemies.
Branch Manipulate: She controls the branch to either trap, stab, crush, or those three to her enemies.
Pollen Bullets: She shoots pollens from flower, it's dangerous for those who have pollen allergy.
Oxygen Withdrawl: As oxygen comes from tree, she can just manipulate it to stop producting oxygen.
Total Control: She control all of the plants and it's parts at the same time in her area (5 km, and if she's daring enough, 7 km).

Traits: She is a caution girl who always thinks ahead and always do everything to get what she want. But, at the same time, she is the most morally high in there, but when push comes to shove, she's willing to became morally gray. She's also a religious girl eventhought she's never seen wearing a hijab. She is sensitive about her height.

Past: She is a girl from Indonesia whose study onboard to America. In her country, conduits is treated the same as any other people; sometimes there's bullying but it happens to everyone, so she didn't really think about it. She's so shocked when she found out how conduits is treated in America, and try to helps the conduits as much as she can, especially the conduit children.

One day, when Lea is doing grocery, she saw a truck who holds the captured conduits. She saw a few of them is children, and became enraged. She use her power to release the prisoners and lead them to safety, but not before she got captured because a miscalculation.

Family: Mother, Father, and a little brother (All alive in their country), and the many cats she adopted.
Likes: Cats, children, family, Indomie instant noodle.
Dislikes: Politics, corrupt people, cheap soap opera.
Outfit: Always wear hoodie to cover her head (her favorite one is the one Nanami Chiaki from SDR2 wears), sometimes wear hijab, t-shirt that didn't show her curve, man's jeans, shoes with attachable rollers.
Looks: Has brown-skin, large brown eyes, black hair, is very short (like 146 cm).
Skills: Gymnastic, parkour, drawing, photograph.

Oh, and I just want to tell you, that chaoter 3 is a bit... mess in the mobile version. Thank you.
Thanatos 2018 chapter 3 . 8/17/2018
Name Ray(rippeer)
Gender male
Power time/lightning it switches randomly.
Traits split personality disorder. Talk and the way he holds himself changes. Ray is usually a nice and funny guy. His other personality is ripper he has a sadistic streak that he can take a paper fold it into a sword and kill 3 guys before it tears.
Past He already had the split personality to keep him company. When bullies picked on him ripper took over and defended Ray and taught them a lesson. When the beast showed up and activated his powers ripper went mad due to being a split personality and absorbing most of the blast from hurting Ray. He will kill without mercy but he never does due to Ray pleading with him not to. Ripper will only follow Ray's rules and others if Ray asks him to. Blacksmithing as a hobby.
Family orphan.
Likes training,tacos,gym, library and entertaining kids. Ripper saving the innocent and punishing the evil
Dislikes bullies, Augustine,drugdealers, and law breakers, and ripper when the person he wants to kill when he/she is innocent.
Outfit black leather jacket white t shirt black pants black tennis shoes.
Looks black hair brown eyes(Ray)red eyes(ripper) Texas accent. Tanned skin.
Skillz sword, marksmanship,chess,games, entertainment,
Karma ranking system same as delsins
Cold eye chapter 2 . 7/19/2018
I like the premise you got here so far, I haven’t seen much stories where delsin is caught by the D.U.P. Much less an SYOC one.

If the paragraphs became more detailed, and if there aren’t many typos. You could have a solid story on your hands.

Can’t wait for the next chapter.
Luck Dice chapter 2 . 7/19/2018
Name: Oswald Pierce
Age: 27
Appearance: standard D.U.P Uniform. Blonde hair, brown eyes.
Likes: guns, exercise, tv.
Dislikes: D.U.P, Spiders, Augustine.

Conduit power: Oxygen Manipulation.

Oxygen Generation: can generate oxygen so he could get a new batch of fresh air.
Oxygen mimicry: Can mimic the properties of oxygen.
Oxygen Swirl: can create a tornado made of oxygen.
Oxygen club: can form a club out of oxygen for a melee attack.
Oxygen removal/absorption: can absorb or remove oxygen from an area. This can be used to deoxygenate an area so the enemy can breathe, to negate fires, and erase water. (By removing the oxygen molecules of water it will disappear)

Oswald was working in military when the government discovered he had the conduit gene. He was given a special offer to join the D.U.P and took it. His powers activated and he began to work under Augustine to lock up other conduits and serve the D.U.P.

But when Oswald discovered how corrupt Augustine was, he went rogue. Doing everything in his power to stop the concrete queen. Even though he wants to defeat her the cleanest way possible. He is willing to break a few rules if it’s nesscary to do so.
Guest chapter 2 . 7/19/2018
Cool
Fail plane chapter 2 . 7/18/2018
Loved the interactions between delsin and Derek. I can tell they’ll be the best of friends!
Cosmic Cube chapter 2 . 7/18/2018
Here’s my Original character, I’ve been think of it for a while.

Name: Esme Crane
Age: 19
Appearance: blonde hair, black hoodie and pants, green eyes. Scar of right eye scratch out crow
Family: Aunt (decease)
Likes: Birds, the outdoors, pastries
Dislikes: closed spaces, child abuse, and mirrors

Backstory: after her mother died in a car accident, her aunt took guardenship of her, at the cemetery that she runs. she began to abuse her emotionally and sometimes physically. Every time Esme misbehaves, her aunt would lock her in a shed located inside the cemetery. Which was infested with crows. Every time she was put in here, the crows would shriek, peck and scratch at her.

On one particular night, when she was punished, one of the crows clawed her eye out. The emotional trauma from the experience activated her conduit gene. And she began to absorb the birds into her being. When she defeated the birds, she broke out of the shed and ran away, but not before using her powers to kill her aunt for the terrible torture she afflicted on her.

Unlike most people, she doesn’t let her trauma tear her apart, instead she uses it overcome her obstacles and enemies. She also developed a fondness for birds, even though these winged creatures hurt her, she understood it wasn’t their fault, they’re just following instinct.

Power: Bird Manipulation. Esme can control all forms of birds.

Feather Barrage: Shoot Out a stream of razor sharp feathers.
Falcon strike: shoot out a missile of orange energy. In the form of a bird.
Dash: turns into a flock of crows for a dash.
Bird Mimicry: Can turn into a bird. And can even form wings, beaks, and claws on any bart of her body.
Can mind control birds, as well as see through their sense, feel their emotions, mutate birds, and verbal communicate with them.

Here it is, hope you like it
Fail plane chapter 1 . 4/28/2018
Name: Derek Lane
Gender: Male
Age: 27
Conduit Element: Ocean.
Derek can materials and substances found in the ocean: such as sea water, coral, sand, and fish.

"Sea Cannon" Release a stream of sea water at opponents; with chunks of sand and coral in between.
"Tidal Wave" Produce a small wave that slams into opponents, stunning them.
"Seaweed Whip" Produce a whip made out of plant life from the ocean; can be used to grapple ledges or enemies.
"Absorb stuff from the ocean"
"Ocean Pool" Turn the surrounding floor into ocean water; enemies that fall in the pool will have to deal with water currents and fish that will attack them. Also, He can only use this move once before recharging, takes a while before he can use it again.

Personality: Derek is usually nervous when out on missions, being scared he will be caught or killed. Despite this, he tries to put his fear aside to do the right thing.

Outfit: Brown hair, Asian, grey eyes, Red vest with a orange polo shirt underneath, brown pants, grey backpack, black tennis shoes.

Family: One brother: Jacob.

likes: Swimming, burgers, rock music
Dislikes, flying on airplanes, cats, and being alone for long periods of time.

Backstory/History: Derek was a adult who went on a cruise with his friends to enjoy the summer. Tragedy struck however, a storm took the cruise ship down, sinking everyone to the waves below. Derek managed to survive by using a piece of the ship as a raft. For days he was stuck on that platform, dying to get off. The suffering from this experience activated his powers. To which he manipulated the water to get back to shore. However he was scarred from the ordeal, being not able to rescue his friends in time.

Skills: Derek knows how to swim and fish.
BornVillain42 chapter 1 . 4/30/2018
Name: Max Thorne
Age: 22
Gender: Male
Power: Rock Manipuation
Traits:
-Can manipulate rocks of any size, ranging from sand to heavy stone bolders
-Golden Glass and Crystal: This means that Max can also turn Rocks into gold glass and green crystals, like the earth
-Enhanced Durability
-Stone Fists, a permanant marking of his powers, usually wears black leather gloves to hide it
Past: Kicked out of school for fighting a bully, left home after parents told him to to prevent his famil'ys arest due to the DUP. Still remains in contact
Family:
Jackson Thorne (Father/Alive)
Rebecca Thorne (Mother/Alive)
Damien Thorne (Younger Brother/Alive)
Likes: Video Games, Fighting, A Good Girlfriend, Expirimenting With His Powers
Dislikes: Brook Augustine, Boredom, Conduit Haters,
Outift: Black Leather Vest with Black Undershirt, Combat Pants and Boots, Fingerless Gloves, Resperator Mask (while fighting)
Blue Wolf chapter 1 . 4/28/2018
Name: Edward Howl
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Power: Anger Manipulation.
List of abilities:
Anger solidification: Turn the emotion of anger into solid energy. (Like video.)
Anger Sphere: Shoot spheres made of anger.
Anger Claws: Shoot claws made out of anger.
Rage Spikes: Punches the ground to release spikes made of rage energy.
Rage inducement: Release a certain amount of anger energy in a certain area to make everyone into a rage frenzy.
Traits: Edward is easily irritable and slightly impulsive, thanks to his powers affecting his emotional state. But he is trying his best to keep himself under control.
Family: Uncle (status unknown)
Likes: Video games, pizza, writing,
Dislikes: Being interrupted, D.U.P, Reality tv.
Outfit: Brown Pants, Yellow T-shirt, red sneakers, short black hair, Hispanic, brown eyes.
Backstory: He was captured by The D.U.P. when he tested by those scanner gates. He was transfer to Curdan Cay and was tested on. The constant abusive made him enraged and hurt; getting no break within the prison. One day, he managed to slip his cuffs off and use his powers to escape the prison. Living his life to the fullest.
Guest chapter 1 . 4/27/2018
You spelled Captured wrong in the plot synopsis
chocolatemoose chapter 1 . 4/27/2018
Here's my OC
Name: Brie London
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Karma: Neutral
Power: Brie is a rust conduit, that means she can control rusted flakes and metal.
(Rust Scraps): Shoot shards of rusted metal.
(Rust Bomb): Shoot a bomb of rusted flakes, that explode.
(Rust Sword): Turns on of her arms into a rusty metal blade (Which is almost the length of her body.)
(Rust Touch): Everything Brie touches with her hands become rusted, this applies to metallic and non-metallic objects alike, making the turned substance brittle and weak. Organic objects are tricky to transform though (Requires constant contact to be fully transformed.) to prevent any accidents, she wears gloves to cover her hands. (Which have also have been turned to rust.)
Likes: Beach, Cheese, Flowers.
Dislikes: Hospitals, Staying up late, Pop music.
Appearance/Outfit: Long Red hair, Caucasian, blue jeans, green eyes, Green vest, rusty gloves.
Backstory: Brie was once a journalist for a newspaper, one day she decided to investigate The D.U.P for the truth. So in response, the D.U.P. lied to the authorities of her being insane, even going as far as to forge evidence to frame her.
She was sent to a mental asylum and was locked into a padded room, she became miserable in the room and desperately wanted to get out. Eventually she discovered her powers, and used it to turn one of the walls into rust. She busted the wall and escaped into the free world.
Skills: Is good at investigating an area for clues.
The Crystal Brick chapter 1 . 4/27/2018
Name: Mike Heller

Gender: Male

Age: 32

Power: Fireworks.

Mike can manipulate pyrotechnic energy and fireworks.

He can generate fireworks our of his hands and into the air for an attack or a distraction.

for missile he can shoot small balls of pyrotechnic energy at an enemy, blowing them to pieces.

He can fly and dash in the air, by surrounding himself in pyrotechnic energy, when he moves, a trail of fireworks (he can only use this ability for a short time before he has to land on the ground.

Lastly he can absorb pyrotechnic energy from firecrackers and handheld sparklers (He carries these to recharge his powers.)

Family:
Mother: Deceased
Father: Deceased

likes: Soda, Jogging, sightseeing.
dislikes: Tuna, Hot temperatures, politics.

He wants to do the right thing, but he struggles with internal conflict within himself. Can't decide if he should give people a second chance or let them burn in hell.

Outfit: Grey jacket, blue jeans, golden watch, Black goggles (To protect his eyes from the firework explosions).

Looks: African-American, Black hair, blue eyes, Burn scar on right cheek, tattoo of a solider on left bicep.

Backstory: Mike was a guy who was born and raised in the poorest slums of the city, but he managed to make a great living for himself, (With Encouragement from his parents), He became a firefighter and did his duty to protect the city from burning, One day his parent's apartment building was on fire, so he and his team went in their firetruck to put out the fire.

They managed to save a good bit of people, but Mike's parent's were still trapped inside, so he went inside, disobeying the orders of his superior, when he reached his parent's flat, and found them to be burning alive. He tried to use his fire extinguisher but it was no use.

He parents perished inside the flames, with the fire creeping up on Mike as it burned him alive. Thankfully, his conduit gene activated, managing to save his life, but not his parents. He escaped the burning building a went out into the world as a vigilante. Deciding on what to do with his life.

Skills: Aside from having good body strength, he has the knowledge of a fire-fighter. Which will in come in handy if a fire hazard is involved.