Very nice! Please continue the story.

Aww Cute. The Beginning Was A Little Confusing As There Was No Indication Of A Dream And It Needs Sharpening Of Dialogue And Monk's A Bit Too Sentimental But It's Good. Love Is Blossoming. More Please? But Why Was Natalie Crying?

Loved this! Please do more! :)

I have only recently discovered "Monk" and am slowly working my way through the series. I've also discovered "Monk" fanfic and particularly enjoy stories that make the effort to bring Monk and Natalie together slowly. With all of his issues and his nearly insurmountable attachment to h is late wife, I think the only way he would ever develop a romantic attachment to anyone would be at a snail's pace. I absolutely loved your idea of his calling her for weather reports and this being the beginning of a deeper friendship between the two of them. I think it's a fantastic premise on which to deepen their relationship into something more.

Your writing is not as bad as you seem to think. The plot is believable, and I could imagine the banter of each call you depicted actually happening on the show. It seemed very in-character for both of them to me. I do think the story itself could be improved a lot by a beta reader, someone who is meticulous about grammar and punctuation, so my suggestion is for you to seek one out. I noticed a few errors, particularly with punctuation. They were little things that didn't distract from the story much but that could improve it a great deal if they were fixed. As an example, in the call where she puts "The Thin Man" on speaker for him, you have this line: "'I am,' Monk said although his tone sounded anything but ok, 'it's just Trudy, and I used to watch those movies together.'" The way the punctuation is written, there would be a pause between Trudy and the word "and." So you would read it this way: "It's just Trudy. And I used to watch those movies together." But, of course, that makes no sense, so you go back and reread the sentence the way you intended, which would be punctuated like this: "'I am,' Monk said, although his tone sounded anything but okay. 'It's just... Trudy and I used to watch those movies together." This is not such a big deal as to make the story unreadable because the reader can fix it properly in their own mind and read it as intended, but it does take your reader out of the flow of the story a bit.

Also, I think it would be more readable if you made some slight changes in formatting. For example, if the dream sequence with Mitch at the beginning were italicized, it would be less confusing for the reader when Monk interrupts the dream with his phone call. I initially read it and thought, "Wait, huh? I thought this was 2005. Isn't Mitch already dead?" It took me a while to figure out it was a dream, and it took me out of the flow of the story a bit. I also think putting each date in bold or maybe putting a dashed line between each different phone call would be helpful for your reader to make the transition. Especially if you're reading the story on a smaller screen like a phone, those sort of small changes make a world of difference.

I do want to tell you I am thoroughly enjoying what you have written, though. Please don't take my criticisms as anything other than suggestions for minor changes that can help you make it even better. The plot and the characterizations, which are the most important parts of any story, are both excellent thus far, and I am very much looking forward to seeing where you take these two characters next. Please keep writing! Can't wait to see the next installment!

:Very nice! Please continue the story.