Nice

Huh, I was expecting Weiss to come back looking for Jaune waiting to fight.

Holy shit I did not expect that. At least my boi didn’t go out a virgin haha

Well, that escalated quickly.

As a fan of twist endings, this was one. Thanks I guess? In all seriousness though, this was better as the 5 shot. That last chapter, regardless of its outcome really wasn't good. The 5th chapter had a better ending.

In short, while I will favorite this fic, stopping at 5 from this point on.

God fucking dammit, this is so unfair. What a fucking ending, I love it and I hate it. You magnificent bastard, WHAT ARE THESE FEELS!

...What the fuck?
That was such a huge ass pull Trump would be ashamed he never did something like this.

Tragedy is fine, but either I’m about as dense as Jaune, or there is no lead up to the last chapter. The whole point of chapters 1-5 is healing and bonding. If you wanted a tragic ending, you should have made it clear in previous chapters what was holding Jaune back from accepting the past and looking towards the future. Give him a fatal flaw that forces him to abandon his friends and self-interest. All we get is how his relationships are helping him cope and improve, which makes his defection appear really stupid and OOC. It also makes chapter 6 radiate unnecessary angst.

Tragedy is tragic not because of the inevitable death/heartache/etc., but because readers can see how each character’s core strengths and flaws make escape from their struggles impossible. There should be few plot twists or surprises here; it is your job to beat us over the head with how little Jaune has truly moved on, how much guilt he feels at establishing a romantic connection with Yang instead of Pyrrha so that when he does leave, we know where he’s going. So that instead of being as confused as Yang is, you create suspense and tension by signaling that there will be a confrontation between a desperate, twisted Jaune and a hurt, confused Yang.

It might have been better to make this fic longer, building up the strength of Yang and Jaune’s relationship while simultaneously undermining it by turning Jaune’s guilt over Pyrrha into an obsession. Focus on juxtaposing his real, healthy and heartwarming interactions with Yang against his tortured guilt and longing for a friend lost. Making us aware of the choice he forces on himself - Pyrrha or everyone else - also adds power to his tender moments with Yang; they can be seen either as him truly moving on or as him saying goodbye, another example of where giving us more info actually adds uncertainty and ratchets up the tension.

What’s frustrating is that the first 5 chapters succeed in creating a wonderful slice-of-life Dragonslayer fluff piece, but then it’s all torn down by a final chapter that not only destroys the work of the past chapters, but does so for no significant pay-off. You haven’t examined how Jaune’s failure to protect his partner warps how he sees his role as a hero and you didn’t write this to explore how Yang reacts to her betrayal by yet another person she is close too (otherwise there would be better closure for Yang). I don’t know what you were trying to do in the last chapter except make us feel bad. That’s not a recipe for high tragedy; it’s a recipe for scathing reviews.

You're an ass. You know that, right?

Loved the ending!

Rocks fall, everyone dies.

Not changing the tag to tragedy so as not to spoil anything just annoys readers who want to avoid tragedy. Like me. You lied to us just so people would be more likely to read. If I knew it was tragedy, I wouldn’t have read it, sure. But, if you were lying to me about the genre then you didn’t deserve my time and attention anyway.

So, by that choice, you changed your story from one which might not have gotten the attention it deserved to one that didn’t deserve the attention it got.

Not that the rest of the story wasn’t good, I mean. Don’t get me wrong. I liked it.

Also, life is fair, people aren’t.

And a promising story drops the ball hard once again.

Sure its fine if you want to make a tragic story and whatnot. But this honestly came out of nowhere to result in a wtf ending.

Ultimately, what was the point of spending the past 15 minutes to read this story?

It's always weird seeing writers tank their own stories just so they can be tragic, like why even bother with it? You don't get edgy points for it.

Instead of whinging because I didn't get what I wanted and defaulting to calling the story bad; thank you this was a great read and the ending was also really enjoyable despite what others might think. Though I do understand where they are coming from; that is their own personal opinion and just because it isn't their cup of tea doesn't mean it's not mine or that of someone else.

I really appreciate this fanfiction and I look forward to seeing more.

WTF the story was great overall but my happy ending is ruined, why would you do this to my happy ship? wtf?!

Rushed in my opnion