A great self contained adventure through and through, it never skipped a beat and never had any excess fat to it.

The stronger focus on Mouser's failed romance with the princess does add a layer of idealism and connection to the character while still feeling in touch with the self-serving nature of the setting, both sides applied in this case.

The worldbuilding/action scenes/comedy (the "useless" hammer) and intrigue were well realized, from the snowball effect that was the glass to Von's slowly unfolding affiliations. In fact Von's man in black/piercing blue eyes combo does remind me of Westley, so that added more to the experience for me.

This chapter put me on an emotional roller coaster! Poor Altennia! I was so furious when Vondahghzio turned out to be working for that stupid prince, and then even madder to find out the stupid prince has a harem and wants her to replace his chief wife, whom he's angry with. Given her volatile personality, it makes me worry if she will be similarly replaceable in the future.

I love how even in her distress, Altennia shows affection and caring for the common folk. And then Mouser's gift was so sweet and caring!

There were a couple things I really loved about how you wrapped this up. First off, I LOVE that it turns out that there was no spell at all; Altennia has bipolar disorder and that explains her erratic behavior. It was a refreshing twist and nicely resolves the mystery of why breaking the hand glass didn't work. The second thing I loved was that you didn't have Mouser come in and save the day. When he prepared that magical gift for her, I thought it was going to be something that would rescue her from the prince somehow, and maybe even bring her and Mouser back together, but it wasn't. It was just a sweet memento that can gift her comfort through her difficult life that's coming. It was unexpected and realistic; sometimes the girl doesn't get saved from the arranged marriage. Well done subverting my expectations and creating a story that felt believable. In spite of my discomfort with some of the content, I really enjoyed this story and am, as always, very impressed with your writing. :)

Hey there, VST! I'm not quite BACK per se, or at least, I can't promise that I am, but my internship is over and some other things are wrapping up, and I decided to go ahead and give you what will be your prize review from the Christmas Challenge. I didn't see where you told me which story to read, but I figured you'd probably want me to continue with this.

I liked the description of the smoke and how it responded to Mouser's attack; it was pretty vivid, and I was easily able to picture what was happening. I also got a kick out of Mouser's comment about the hole in the ceiling. Of course he and Fafhrd have a random hole in the ceiling to use for an escape route. Though if it's an escape route for BOTH of their use, I have to wonder how big it is...

I was intrigued by the role the ceiling rafters played in the fight between Mouser and the two men; that was a neat setting for a fight scene and allowed for some interesting features to the fight. It worked particularly well at the last, when Mouser was able to fake losing his balance and then kill Kevlas; you've showcased Mouser's cleverness once again and shown how deadly he can be on turf that he is familiar with but his enemies are not. I like how he decided to let the one guy go, too. He turned a situation where he was being attacked into a situation where he was the one showing mercy and giving threats!

Great job amping up the suspense at the end of the fight between Fafhrd and Vondahghzio; the switch in perspective kept me on the edge of my seat. I was so afraid Fafhrd was going to get hurt, and then so relieved when he was able to deflect the knives. Vondahghzio lives to fight another day, but Fafhrd did wound him, and I wonder if he was able to see anything in that moment when the mask got cut.

Great writing as always! This was a pretty short chapter, which led to a short review, so I'll see if I can get another one in tonight as well. :) It was really good to step back into this story again; I've really missed fanfic, especially yours.

For the most part, I liked your description of Fafhrd's reaction to the smoke in the first paragraph; I like the description of his hands and arms tingling, of his hair standing on end, of the smoke "roiling" and "seething." However, I think it loses a lot of its potency in places because you use unnecessary phrases and especially qualifiers. Take a look at how well the paragraph flows if we trim the fat a little:

"Having lost his pursuers, Fafhrd reached the stairs and started his way up to the small apartment on the top floor. He was about to put his foot down on the sixth tread when he smelled sulfur and felt the exposed skin on his hands an arms tingle with an unnatural burning. Glancing down, he saw a roiling, seething ball of black smoke rolling up and by him on the stairs. The hair on his arms and head stood on end; his arms were going numb."

Of course, you can tweak it and decide what you think should stay or go; my point is just that when you get rid of the qualifiers and phrases that don't add anything to the description, it flows better and comes across more powerfully. The same principle applies throughout; be sparing in your use of "almost," "seemed," etc. They weaken your descriptions, which are otherwise really good.

I love how they've totally underestimated Fafhrd and are so shocked when he references the magic in terms that clearly show he knows what he's talking about. It was smart of him to do a little name-dropping, too; maybe intimidate these thugs a bit.

I find it amusing how Mouser references "mov[ing] around the apartment for the second time that day," since the first time he was trying to get away from the princess, and this time he's trying to protect her.

Lol! Assassins don't fight fair? Okay, then Fafhrd doesn't either!

"Leave it to the landlord to keep us from stealing it" - Hmm, Mouser. Can't possibly imagine why the landlord would be concerned about that. :P I like how you inject a little bit of humor in the midst of all this tension. It suits Mouser's character so well.

"...grapnel and chord" - I could be wrong, but I think you mean "cord," not "chord."

This was a tense chapter, and aside from the excessive use of qualifiers, it was well-written. I'm eager to see if Mouser's plan works, especially because it Fafhrd needs some help. He's smart and skilled and HUGE, but this Vondahghzio specializes in killing, and somehow I think if anyone will be a match for Fafhrd, he might. I look forward to reading on!

Hey, VST! Back again! Sorry for the lateness; internship has, not surprisingly, been taking up most of my time. I'm going to have to be a bit more judicious about when I tag in the middle of the week.

I like the matter-of-fact tone of this line: "...but other, current rumors claimed that the troops had been paid on time recently and were well fed, so the probability of rebellion was low." It's so reasonable and straightforward in pointing out that when soldiers are treated fairly, they're much more likely to behave responsibly, and it simultaneously acknowledges the fact that they rarely ARE treated fairly. I can't tell from the context if this is a "common knowledge" sort of thing or a bit of reasoning from Fafhrd's wonderful common sense, but I like to think the latter, because I always love how practical Fafhrd is and the way he always knows what's what when others are inclined to over-dramatize.

This is just a nitpick, but one doesn't usually say that gray at his temples "made him more distinguished," as it really does nothing of the sort, but "made him appear more distinguished."

I liked this line as further confirmation of Vondahghzio's character: "If this worked, the spell would be worth ten times the price. If it didn't, the assassin lord figured that he would have little trouble retrieving the payment from the wizard's body." He might be a little overconfident, though. This is a wizard we're talking about!

The section in which the Mouser prepares really fell flat for me. I think the main problem was that the description was excessive - two adjectives for the trousers, three for the tunic, two for the sheath, three for the boots, etc. As well as every single item he's carrying. I don't feel like I need to know all of this. It slows down the action. Peter Jackson could get away with showing each detail of Aragorn preparing for battle in The Two Towers because the camera can cut rapidly from one action to the next and convey all the detail about each item in one snapshot. But in writing, it just doesn't have the same effect.

I get that this line is trying to set the scene, but it doesn't quite have the effect you were going for: "The last remnants of daylight were rapidly disappearing and, as happened every night, darkness was beginning to settle like an unstoppable force over Lankhmar." For the most part it's a nice line, but I have to admit, my first reaction to "as happened every night was, "No, duh." :P You don't need to tell us that it gets dark every night. ;) Also, because you don't elaborate on "multitudinous signs," the reader has absolutely no idea what you're talking about when you tell us that "the signs weren't really there, but something had felt wrong..." Could you either elaborate on those "signs" or clarify that last part?

I liked the scene in the bar. Fafhrd's scenes have consistently been my favorite in this fic; he's so canny and down-to-earth. I like the way he problem-solves and how aware he seems to be of how the city works and what he needs to do to move safely around it and do his business, although it seems it wasn't enough this time. I also like his bluntness to the bartender, because Fafhrd tells it like it is.

You use "seemed" and "appeared" an awful lot in this chapter: seven times for "seemed" (or a form of it) and five times for "appeared" (when it has the same meaning as "seemed"). It's especially noticeable in the last two sections. These words give the reader the impression that you're hesitant in what you're describing. If there's a cloud of smoke, then there's a cloud of smoke. If the flashes are getting stronger, they're getting stronger. Don't be hesitant to say so.

SPAG:
- "...and to provide patrols in certain, more affluent areas of the southern parts of the city." - The comma there really isn't necessary.
- "...and then positioned his small pouch in position on his belt." - Not exactly SPAG, but you say "position" twice here.

Overall, this certainly wasn't my favorite chapter. It's rather slow, and there are some places where it drags. But Fafhrd is well-characterized as always, and there was some good characterization of Vondahghzio as well. I'm looking forward to continuing! :)

Hahaha! I love how Fafhrd just picks up that hammer and leaves the Mouser to his problems. He did his part, but Mouser's going to have to work this one out for himself! He's got nothing left for this one except a vague final word of advice: "Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Oh, dear...

Mouser's conflicted feelings about what's going on and his examination of his own actions were both amusing and interesting. I like how he asks himself if he allowed her to corner him, knowing that he wouldn't have let that happen in combat. The wording of that paragraph is a little awkward, though. I'm not really sure what "as a result" is referring to; it doesn't really seem necessary to that sentence. And then "but also a little relieved" doesn't clearly connect to that next sentence; it seems to suggest that he's a little more in tune with his feelings and motivations than the next sentence leads me to believe. I would deal with the surprise of finding himself backed up against the wall, then have him question his motives, and then possibly explore the fact that he's relieved she caught him. Just to show that clearer progression.

I also like how he can't help thinking in terms of his usual preferences about women, that he usually doesn't like it when they're overly pushy, but the fact that she's a "beautiful young princess" makes him inclined to overlook that. Two major parts of his characterization - his sexuality and his sense of self-preservation - are in conflict here, and you do a good job showing the struggle between them.

I love Fafhrd's scheme to get rid of the hammer again, knowing his old buddy would have been too drunk to actually remember for sure that it was gone! That whole interaction was hilarious, the way Fafhrd has Krinch totally convinced he "won" the chance to fill in for him and the thing with the hammer was just a dream! He's so clever!

Another well-written chapter! Great job!

I absolutely love Fafhrd. He continually surprises me; he's just not your stereotypical "brawny" type of character. He knows how to act like the big, raucous, ale-drinking, womanizing type like Krinch, but he's also got definite elements of refinement, like knowing how to bandage up his friend in an earlier chapter, or here having quite a good singing voice. He's got more sense than the Mouser half the time, and he's also got tact, like how he let Krinch win a card game to get rid of his giant mathom (if I may use a Tolkien word). Ladies, get you a man who can do both! :P

Of course, you know my sensibilities about sex outside of marriage, but I can still appreciate the ironic humor of the Mouser's current situation. This was quite a clever phrase: "particularly one in her rather delicate virginal condition." His thoughts about the problems with her father being a king and also with her wanting "beautiful babies" were also amusing.

Haha, Fafhrd's not taking any nonsense from Mouser about the spell affecting him too. Nope, three words: "beautiful young princess." Nice try, Mouser, but your friend knows you too well.

Haha, I think my favorite bits with Fafhrd may be when his reasonableness and his brawn are working together: "we may need to be prepared to tie her up and gag her or even give her a little tap on the head, if needed..." Aww, but he doesn't really want to hurt her after all. He's really gentle, just also practical.

I love the total incongruity of the way this is phrased: "My former master of all things arcane, the great Glavas Rho, taught me that it's really difficult to break magical devices, so we're hoping that between Fafhrd and that monstrosity, we'll be able to break it." The first part is so grand and formal, but it transitions to frustrated and ironic without a break. It just sounds right for the Mouser's voice; I love it.

That twist at the end of the chapter is AWESOME! I love how this whole time you've been leading up to the idea that it's this huge spell that's got to be broken using extreme force, making Fafhrd go and get the gigantic hammer and haul it up all those stairs and everything, and then Mouser literally breaks it with his dagger. And as if that weren't enough of a shock, you also mislead us into believing for a second that the spell is broken, and then it turns out it isn't, and NOW WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO DO? I was totally not expecting that! I love it!

SPAG:
- "It a magic hand glass." - Just a typo: You meant "It is" or "It's."

This was a really well written and fascinating chapter. MAJOR KUDOS on that twist!

Oh, dear, what a mess. :P Mouser's clearly a bit infatuated himself, no spell required, and he'd like to believe it's all on his own merit. Fafhrd is hilariously candid, though: "Mouser, we can always hope against hope, but I'm definitely going with the spell this time." I wasn't quite sure about Fafhrd resuming his "coughing fit" at the same time as rolling his eyes at the Mouser, though. I think it would be funnier if you just said that Fafhrd was coughing again and then described Mouser's response to having to conduct the princess to the privy or something. ;)

Loved Fafhrd's summary of the Mouser's teacher's advice: "So, hit them if it's short, and kill them if it's long?" LOL! He doesn't mind a little head-bopping, but let's not get crazy...

I love that Fafhrd lost the weapon to Krinch seemingly on purpose just to get rid of it. It's not everyone who has to pretend to lose to get rid of a gigantic heavy weapon that's sitting around gathering dust under their bed, lol! I think Mouser's dialogue in describing the thing was a little forced, though; you can remind a person of something, but giving that much information about it in dialogue when the person already clearly knows what you're talking about makes the dialogue forced. I'd transfer a bit of that into narration.

Vonda-fingersmash :P comes across as quite intimidating, especially when he brings a knife out of nowhere and when he warns the rich man never to say his name again. I liked what he said about there always being another way but not always a better way. He clearly knows his stuff as an assassin. My only concrit for that scene would be that "Putting emphasis on the phrase just like the man only seconds before" is clunky, and it isn't immediately obvious what it's referring to. I would find a way to reword it or let the emphasis stand on its own.

This chapter was so funny, and Fafhrd was the best part, hands down. I adore his way of handling the situation that's extremely sensible but also takes full advantage of the humor to be found in it. Mouser has really gotten himself into a sticky situation, and even though Fafhrd's going to help him get out of it, he's going to milk it for all it's worth while he has the chance. Love it! :)

Sorry for a shorter and slightly late review; something family-related has come up that's making me a bit distracted and pressed for time. Hopefully I should be able to get review responses and challenge-related things like the poll and the new month's challenge done in a timely manner, though. Till then, keep up the good work!

I had to lol at the phrase "dainty noisemakers"; that's both excellent word choice, unique and amusing, and excellent imagery, as it helps me imagine what the shoes looked like and the sound they made. I loved that. :)

The Mouser is so clever at working out exactly what needs to be done and said to get them away safely - changing the princess's appearance without needing to actually do anything drastic like cutting her hair or harming her, switching out the shoes for the cloth wraps, deciding that the best disguise would be as a "drunken man and a strumpet" on their way home from the festivities. It all seems to come so naturally to him; he doesn't have to wrack his brains for a plan, the answer's just always there. It gives him an air of confidence that makes it easy to believe a princess who's so independently minded would put her faith in him to get her to safety.

I LOVE this line: "No, Princess. I wouldn't make you do it. You only have to do it if you want to actually escape." Some men would have gotten angry or irritated at her refusal, but not the Mouser. He's calm and immensely practical. He doesn't try to force his will on her because he doesn't need to. He's already seen that she has some good sense, and he's relying on that good sense to drive her to do what has to be done as it did with the disguise. That's a great moment of characterization there.

This paragraph has some parallelism issues and just doesn't flow very well: "With her arms around his neck and her lips practically kissing on his ear, the stumbling trip across the Street of the Gods and south into the Tenderloin District was surprisingly uneventful even though the Mouser was pretty uncomfortable with her actions. While they didn't cross unseen, they were unsuspected; the watchful eyes that initially tracked their movements soon switched to other drunken revelers making a similar trek toward their homes in less affluent parts of the town to the south." First, the way you've opened the first sentence, Altienna has to be the subject or else it's the "trip" that has its arms around the Mouser's neck, lol. ;) Secondly, the last part of that sentence just sounds awkward to me. And finally, "the watchful eyes that initially tracked their movements" seems to step out of the current POV into an omniscient POV, which sounds off. Here's how I, personally, would reword it:

"With her arms around his neck and her lips practically kissing on his ear, the princess made a stellar performance on the stumbling trip across the Street of the Gods and south into the Tenderloin District, though her actions made the Mouser decidedly uncomfortable. While they didn't cross unseen, they were unsuspected; whatever watchful eyes might have initially tracked their movements must have switched..."

Obviously there are lots of ways you could reword this paragraph that would resolve all the mentioned issues, but maybe my suggestion will at least give you something to work with.

Hah! I love Fafhrd. "Even had fun in a couple of the scuffles," you sweet giant you. :)

Lol, that was fast. I don't blame her, though, after the courage and composure under pressure he showed last night. Still, it seems suspicious, and given the origin of that mirror, I have to wonder if it's related... Fafhrd's choice of the word "spellbound" may not be far off.

This is a fantastic line: "He knew his small friend sometimes had interesting effects on women, but it was usually when he was awake and they were perhaps slightly inebriated and certainly much less royal." I'm not sure why I like it so much except that I guess it shows what Fafhrd thinks of his friend's escapades and also that Fafhrd is very, very aware of who this woman is... I don't know, it's just well worded.

Ha, and spellbound she is. I love how quickly Fafhrd picks up on the exact cause and how bluntly he tells the Mouser, and how it doesn't faze (not "phase") the Mouser either. Oh, how annoying, dark magic. Wasn't expecting to have to deal with THAT today. Lol. :)

A great chapter; I'm really enjoying this tale. I look forward to reading on!

NOTE: I'm so sorry, FFN posted my review before it was finished! :( Here's the complete review. I'm really, really sorry about that.

Hey, VST! I'm excited to return to this story; I love your writing and how deep into the world building you always go. Always a pleasure. :)

I'm not sure about the wording of "bejeweled but razor sharp knife." I never doubted for a minute that it was razor sharp, bejeweled or not, and I don't think you need to separate those with a "but." Also, there's a parallelism issue here: "nicking first his arm and then slicing his cheek." Parallelism requires that this read either "nicking first his arm and then his cheek" or "first nicking his arm and then slicing his cheek."

I love that first exchange between the Mouser and Princess Altienna. He tells her she doesn't know she can trust him, which, while true, was also probably intended to sound dashing and impressive. But Altienna, no impressionable damsel in distress, adapts instantly and tells HIM, "Well, then, don't just stand there ... Let's go!" Love it! :) And her response about whether she can climb a ladder makes it even better. But I feel like "pulling the frightened young woman along with him" doesn't fit well with the rest of the picture you've set up here. I feel like, from what we know of her, she'd be keeping up with him easily, and while she probably is frightened, it doesn't strike me that that would be her dominant emotion at the moment, or at least, if it was, she wouldn't be letting the Mouser see it. Does that make sense?

Vondahghzio. Kelvas. These definitely sound like names that could be somehow related to Karsbal or his people. I don't know what that means, but it sounds like the Mouser is in over his head (no offense intended to the "little man" ;D). He definitely did not intend to get involved in something this big! Then too, I think he's in a bit over his head with Princess Altienna, too! He may have rescued her, but she isn't going to play the weak, grateful girl, and she can think for herself, too. I love that the idea of changing her appearance has already occurred to her and she's already been working on it. But while she's tough, she's still feminine; she'd rather not lose her favorite dress if she can help it. But "Dead women don't have favorite dresses." :) His disguise for her is clever and resourceful; he didn't want to get involved, but he's going to make a good job of it now that he is.

Another very enjoyable chapter! I look forward to reading on! :)

I'm not sure about the wording of "bejeweled but razor sharp knife." I never doubted for a minute that it was razor sharp, bejeweled or not, and I don't think you need to separate those with a "but." Also, there's a parallelism issue here: "nicking first his arm and then slicing his cheek." Parallelism requires that this read either "nicking first his arm and then his cheek" or "first nicking his arm and then slicing his cheek."

I love that first exchange between the Mouser and Princess Altienna. He tells her she doesn't know she can trust him, which, while true, was also probably intended to sound dashing and impressive. But Altienna, no impressionable damsel in distress, adapts instantly and tells HIM, "Well, then, don't just stand there ... Let's go!" Love it! :) And her response about whether she can climb a ladder makes it even better. But I feel like "pulling the frightened young woman along with him" doesn't fit well with the rest of the picture you've set up here. I feel like, from what we know of her, she'd be keeping up with him easily, and while she probably is frightened, it doesn't strike me that that would be her dominant emotion at the moment, or at least, if it was, she wouldn't be letting the Mouser see it. Does that make sense?

Vondahghzio. Kelvas. These definitely sound like names that could be somehow related to

Hi again!

It looks like the end of the road for this story. I found the opening to be a nice start, with the ships sailing towards the Prince’s home.

Ha! I’m pretty sure that Vondar guy is actually that master assassin. That cut on his cheek was a dead giveaway. So it appears that the prince was behind everything after all, from the attacks on the princess to the appearances of all of those assassins.

It’s quite sad to see that Altennia winds up just being some sort of a ‘replacement’, with her being the chief wife of the prince’s harem. Looks like she really never gets to have a happy ending. :(

At least Mouser’s gift was able to reach her and she managed to see it. However, it only seemed to serve as a cruel reminder to her of how she will probably never get to be with the Mouser, her true love. The hand glass being magically repaired was a nice surprise though. With it, she can still see her beloved Mouser.

My overall thoughts for this story as a whole are that, it’s quite tragic. But I truly enjoyed it, a very good story indeed.

We started off with the Mouser and the Princess meeting in such an action-packed manner, with the Mouser rescuing her. Then the Princess suddenly becomes infatuated with the Mouser after looking through the hand glass. But then their relationship develops and turns into something much more than what the effect of the hand glass did, it turns into true love. Sadly, they never got to be together in the end, as the Princess still has her obligations to fulfill. Still, no matter what distance separates them, they still will pretty much remain in each other’s hearts. :)

Very well done on this action-packed, yet romantic story! :D

As always, I enjoy your writing style. The author who wrote this series must have serious worldbuilding skills, but all props to you for spending the time and the effort to incorporate those details into your own work, from the religious celebrations to the palanquin to the Mouser thinking about how his rent is overdue. All of these little details add so much realism to your story.

I was a bit confused by this sentence: "It was a gentle thrum that he immediately associated with the sound of a taut bowstring being plucked." The word "associated" just didn't seem to capture what you were trying to express here, with the result that I couldn't tell if it was actually a bowstring or just sounded like one. If it was one, then I would say "that he immediately identified as the sound..."; if it wasn't, then I would say "that reminded him of the sound..." Either way, it's clearer than "associated with." I also had a couple of other nitpicks for the first section: First, you don't need hyphens in "every so slightly," and second, "comment" seems too calm and unemotional a word to describe what the "second shadow" said. I would have written it as "Just as the second shadow finished speaking..."

I had to laugh at Altienna's, "Mistress Shareena, if you think this cloth covering can keep us safe if there's danger, you're crazy. Personally, I much prefer to depend on the good men of our escort." She's right, of course! And I like that she's willing to offer trust and respect to the men protecting her even if her guardian will not.

I really appreciated the way you took the time to explain the Mouser's motivations to us before he got involved. Knowing him to be a thief and an opportunist, I wasn't expecting him to get involved, but bringing out his sense of fairness picked up from his friends gave him a sufficient motivation, and the use of the phrase "rubbed him the wrong way" kept it perfectly in character even as he did something I hadn't expected. And of course, he fought on his own terms as well, slipping out of the shadows to attack swiftly and silently. Well characterized.

I don't think you realized, but you used the word "front" six times in the section where the attack is described. Two separate times, it's used twice in the same sentence. The section is overall pretty well-written, but the repetition of "front" makes it sound clunky. The word "noisy" was also used twice in rapid succession, which isn't as big an issue but still hurts the flow a bit. "Forward" is also overused, both in that section and the one that follows it.

Adding to the Mouser's characterization and realistic motivation is the way he considers leaving once the odds seem evened out. He's not necessarily helping the good guys, just making the fight fair. I really love how you did that.

Great ending to the chapter; way to keep the reader hooked and eager to turn the page! :)

As always, I enjoyed and was greatly impressed by your writing. Keep up the good work!

Hi again!

Ah, it looks like this amazing journey is finally coming to an end. It also seems that the effect of the hand glass has worn off seeing as the Princess isn’t madly in love with the Mouser anymore. It’s kind of sad to see that after all they’ve been through, she still chose to go back home and be married to someone she doesn’t love. :(

The reward given to the Mouser honestly looked way too little than what he should’ve received. Though, at least he got that special ‘Gratitude’ medal, perhaps he can use it on his time of need.

And wow, everything that the Mouser and his friend, Fafhrd, had done has been covered up. All the credit and especially all the reputation that they rightfully deserved was given to another. That is quite unfair and it seems that the Mouser really can’t do anything about it. Still, at least he managed to get a present for the Princess. It probably also serves as his final ‘farewell’ to her. I do hope that it reaches the princess, would be a shame if it didn’t.

It’s also nice to see Corsber get busted and handled by his family in the end.

Very nice chapter, great job! :)

Hi!

Wow, that was quite an exciting start to the chapter, with the Mouser fending off the dangerous smoke. It seems his idea worked, but not in the way he thought it would. Water is apparently the weakness of that smoke, solidifying it and thus allowing the Mouser to destroy it. I also liked the descriptions of how it slowly died off and disappeared.

I love the fact that the Mouser already has an alternative escape route prepared, it just shows how smart he is.

And it looks like the battle is still far from over as two assassins quickly followed them. Lucky for the Mouser, the other one got stuck, leaving him to deal with only one assassin. I really like the descriptions of the sword fight that ensued between the Mouser and Kevlas, really well done. Eventually, Mouser’s skill was better than Kevlas, and ended the threat of that assassin. That other assassin is quite lucky, Mouser chose to spare him instead of easily finishing him off.

Back to Fafhrd, it looks like he and Vondahghzio are evenly matched, with none of them making much progress. The thing that surprised me though is how quickly Vondahghzio retreated just because his mask was damaged, but perhaps he doesn’t want his face seen. It was a nice cliffhanger too, can’t wait to see what happens next.

Good job! :)