I honestly didn't like this chapter at all. You spent way too much effort capturing every single frame of the movie instead of diverging and focusing on Aella's perception. It wasn't necessary to describe every tiny little word or action from the film like that. You also barely changed anything despite the fact that everything would be entirely different simply due to Aella's presence. None of the dwarves so much as notice her until she speaks up, which is ridiculous. Especially Thorin. He's a warrior, and very observant in regards to his surroundings. He would have noticed her right away. Gandalf also would have introduced them at the door when Thorin arrived. Why would he only introduce Bilbo? That makes no sense. I also don't understand the complete lack of reaction to Aella from the other dwarves. And Aella's speech to Thorin was terrible. Completely defensive and addressing matters that weren't even brought up. For example, defending the fact that she's a woman. Thorin didn't even mention that at all, which honestly would have been a huge problem right off the bat. Telling them all about how many years specifically she spent in the wilds just sounded like she was a child trying to convince everyone that she's an adult. As if she owes him an explanation, which she doesn't. It also makes no sense not to reveal herself as having been sent by the Valar to help on the quest. Not only would it boost morale by letting the dwarves know that the gods support them, but it would give her greater standing in the group. Her word would be taken more seriously, and her presence more easily accepted. No doubt Thorin will dismiss her advice or concerns because he has no idea that she knows better than him for the most part. Thorin is very suspicious, mistrusting and prejudiced against outsiders. He would never just accept Aella's help so easily. It also went way too smoothly with him having known about a 15th member in advance. There was nothing to overcome, and no chance to prove herself. Furthermore, have you ever read the contract Bilbo signs? It's the most horrendous piece of garbage contract ever written. If she got the same one, she would have immediately protested a shit ton of it.

Lastly, the way you indicate Fili and Kili speaking in Khuzdul was so annoying. Why did you even bold the words when it's obvious already to the reader that the words aren't in English, and since they're being spoken by dwarves, it's easily concluded that it's dwarvish. Then, you put the translation in brackets right after, also in bold. It looks terrible while reading it, and jerks your reader back to the real world rather than staying immersed in the story. Translations should be at the end of each chapter in an AN for anyone who wants to look.

Great start, really. I'm very interested in reading more. My only criticism is the awful stuttering you had Aella do. It was really annoying to read, and definitely didn't capture having a difficult time with a new language. To add to that, there's no way that after two weeks she would have learned enough to have a conversation like that. You didn't mention anything about her being gifted with the ability to learn languages easily, only that she was good at it. No matter how good you are with languages, your portrayal was entirely unrealistic. Aside from that, I really enjoyed this first chapter.

hope the sequel comes out soon im not gonna beg cuzthat would be annoying for you and respectful. I love the story line and everything about it. it's actually one of my favorite GIME fanfiction.

I have a problem with this, a very big problem with this: WHERE IS THE SEQUEL? I am dying to know what's going to happen next! And your choice of song for this made me cry when I looked it up on youtube. So, I have to say (incase you didn't realize it yet) that I LOVE this story and how well written it is and it's just UGH! SO GOOD!

If only I could like this more then once. Please Sequal it uppppppp! 3 13/10 I'm reading it again xD

What a wonderful story! This was such an engaging story! One of my favorites that have come about from searching! I hope you are continuing to write!

This is so good!

Hi,
I really hope you still have plans to continue this with a sequel! I adore your characterisation of the dwarves and Bilbo. They are very close to the book characterisations but also have your own elements built in. I CANNOT WAIT to see what you will do with the LOTR story-arc.
But, more on this one. I love the relationship between Aella and Killi, their closeness is so sweet and I started bawling when their HeartSiblingBraids were done.
I'm not usually an OC fics, but Aella is written so well that I can't fault your use of her.
Anyway...I just wanted to say that I'm super keen to see more of Aella's story in middle-earth and compliment your current work.

please write a sequel!

I never review mostly just a back ground reader ya know? But just wow this was well written and i love it. Can't wait for the next book. Thank you for this

Oh my goodness! I just finished reading this and I am absolutely loving it! Please tell me that the sequel is in the works! 3 It's an excellently written story and I'd love to see it continue!

This story was awesome. I have read a great many Hobbit fics, but this is my favorite. You managed to walk the fine line of too much copying straight from the movie and not adding enough from the movie to know what was going on. I loved also how you made her special with Valar given gifts without being over the top powerful. Part of that was bringing her to Middle-Earth with enough time to grow and gain the skills that she needed. It was fun to see all the history she had with those they met, too. Thank you for all your hard work. I look forward to the sequel. :)

I love it! The whole story! You genious man/woman. Love the last bit to, or the whole last chapter. You begin with the Deednaming(?) and there you have some lovely names. Especially loved Dwalin and Aella. Perfect for them. And then you proceed to kill me by making her sing 'The last Goodbye'. Beautifully done, amazing. All the best luck with writing the sequel. I am going to check your profile now to see if it's up. Didn't do that first, stupid of me. And after that I am supposed to sleep somehow, because the clock is 00:15. How I am going to do that after this I don't know. Joking I'll sleep just fine. Somehow. And now I'm rambling. Really, really loved the story tho! Every last bit of it! Good night.
Blom

Please write a story after this to complete the romance and adventure promised in Aella's future by the Valar.

This was a great story!