Down with Critics United!

They are the cancer to our society.

The root of heresy needs to be burnt to crisp

with over thousand innocent souls without remorse or guilt thereafter.

No sacrifice is too great and no treachery too small.

Remember, we all are walking under the immortal shadow of Him.

His light shines so brightly, it will guide us to our foreseen destiny that is in our grasp.

A great moment we all should not pass.

Praise Be The Emperor of Mankind!

If you are on the same page, cp this message.

And Bella119 is dumb.

Hybrid of Fate is nothing. She needs mental help.

cathrl, do u want to be my daddy? I won't promise to be a good girl :D

CrystalRei should quit.

Now onto the actual review:
squelching contact, low, breathy gasp

Stop writing. O.O

Down with Critics United!

They are the cancer to our society.

The root of heresy needs to be burnt to crisp

with over thousand innocent souls without remorse or guilt thereafter.

No sacrifice is too great and no treachery too small.

Remember, we all are walking under the immortal shadow of Him.

His light shines so brightly, it will guide us to our foreseen destiny that is in our grasp.

A great moment we all should not pass.

Praise Be The Emperor of Mankind!

If you are on the same page, cp this message.

And Bella119 is dumb.

Hybrid of Fate is nothing. She needs mental help.

cathrl, do u want to be my daddy? I won't promise to be a good girl :D

CrystalRei should quit.

Now onto the actual review:
morning sunrise far above the sand

"LGBT communities around the world are calling you a 'hero', and say that you were framed," Al-Sayib explained. ;)

Down with Critics United!

They are the cancer to our society.

The root of heresy needs to be burnt to crisp

with over thousand innocent souls without remorse or guilt thereafter.

No sacrifice is too great and no treachery too small.

Remember, we all are walking under the immortal shadow of Him.

His light shines so brightly, it will guide us to our foreseen destiny that is in our grasp.

A great moment we all should not pass.

Praise Be The Emperor of Mankind!

If you are on the same page, cp this message.

And Bella119 is dumb.

Hybrid of Fate is nothing. She needs mental help.

cathrl, do u want to be my daddy? I won't promise to be a good girl :D

CrystalRei should quit.

Now onto the actual review:
Many thanks to the lovely mrspencil for teaching me about color poetry.

I like to do oil painting, but I don't intend to make that my lifelong occupation. O.o

Down with Critics United!

They are the cancer to our society.

The root of heresy needs to be burnt to crisp

with over thousand innocent souls without remorse or guilt thereafter.

No sacrifice is too great and no treachery too small.

Remember, we all are walking under the immortal shadow of Him.

His light shines so brightly, it will guide us to our foreseen destiny that is in our grasp.

A great moment we all should not pass.

Praise Be The Emperor of Mankind!

If you are on the same page, cp this message.

And Bella119 is dumb.

Hybrid of Fate is nothing. She needs mental help.

cathrl, do u want to be my daddy? I won't promise to be a good girl :D

CrystalRei should quit.

Now onto the actual review:
chipped teacup smashed in a sweltering tent

He keeps a straight face while telling a ridiculous story. ;P;

Down with Critics United!

They are the cancer to our society.

The root of heresy needs to be burnt to crisp

with over thousand innocent souls without remorse or guilt thereafter.

No sacrifice is too great and no treachery too small.

Remember, we all are walking under the immortal shadow of Him.

His light shines so brightly, it will guide us to our foreseen destiny that is in our grasp.

A great moment we all should not pass.

Praise Be The Emperor of Mankind!

If you are on the same page, cp this message.

And Bella119 is dumb.

Hybrid of Fate is nothing. She needs mental help.

cathrl, do u want to be my daddy? I won't promise to be a good girl :D

CrystalRei should quit.

Now onto the actual review:
squelching contact, low, breathy gasp

One of the biggest problems in our modern society is that the people don't see the world as I do. :(

Down with Critics United!

They are the cancer to our society.

The root of heresy needs to be burnt to crisp

with over thousand innocent souls without remorse or guilt thereafter.

No sacrifice is too great and no treachery too small.

Remember, we all are walking under the immortal shadow of Him.

His light shines so brightly, it will guide us to our foreseen destiny that is in our grasp.

A great moment we all should not pass.

Praise Be The Emperor of Mankind!

If you are on the same page, cp this message.

And Bella119 is dumb.

Hybrid of Fate is nothing. She needs mental help.

cathrl, do u want to be my daddy? I won't promise to be a good girl :D

CrystalRei should quit.

Now onto the actual review:
Prompt: A chipped china teacup, by Stutley Constable

For a thousand years, humankind has known peace, but now is the time of the Fourth Great War, as evil has been unleashed again throughout the worlds. O_O

Down with Critics United!

They are the cancer to our society.

The root of heresy needs to be burnt to crisp

with over thousand innocent souls without remorse or guilt thereafter.

No sacrifice is too great and no treachery too small.

Remember, we all are walking under the immortal shadow of Him.

His light shines so brightly, it will guide us to our foreseen destiny that is in our grasp.

A great moment we all should not pass.

Praise Be The Emperor of Mankind!

If you are on the same page, cp this message.

And Bella119 is dumb.

Now onto the actual review:
morning sunrise far above the sand

We would not miss u. ;)

Down with Critics United!

They are the cancer to our society.

The root of heresy needs to be burnt to crisp

with over thousand innocent souls without remorse or guilt thereafter.

No sacrifice is too great and no treachery too small.

Remember, we all are walking under the immortal shadow of Him.

His light shines so brightly, it will guide us to our foreseen destiny that is in our grasp.

A great moment we all should not pass.

Praise Be The Emperor of Mankind!

If you are on the same page, cp this message.

And Bella119 is dumb.

Now onto the actual review:
squelching contact, low, breathy gasp

Are you telling this story or am I?. :-)

Hi there, m’dear! I decided that I was in the mood to not only read a little poetry but show how easy it is to review it at the same time! I don’t recall all the fancy words they taught me in my Poetry class but I remember enough to do this justice, I think. The first thing that caught my attention was the lack of punctuation at the end of each line until you got to the very end. It allowed for the pacing of this piece to flow smoothly, like the tea out of a chipped china teacup. I am rather on the fence about whether to call this a cusp or stanza because it could technically fit into both given its very short length. With free verse poetry, there is no focus on things like rhyme or metering but I do think that there is a lovely lyrical quality to the words that you do use to bring this scene to life.

I must say that what I love most about this poem is how it is a story at the end of it all. Every line represents a situation that is anything but idyllic. The word choices indicate this is a scene from the Great War. You keep the players ambiguous until the very end when we find out that the doctor is at this scene and that someone is ordering for him to be gotten out of there. Now, that could mean that our dear doctor has been shot in this morning skirmish or that the commanding officer is ordering him to remove himself from the heart of the battle because he is needed to help treat those who have been injured and requiring immediate medical attention.

Ah, I love how you interpreted this prompt: A chipped china teacup by utilizing it to show the depravity of war and how small creature comforts from home are what helped many a soldier to get through the traumas of war. I also like the use of the metaphor regarding the chipped china teacup. It is a subtle way of illustrating how fragile the human body is, how easily broken when enough force is applied or a foreign object is inserted.

I love how these two lines here: ((Scorching pale pink
morning sunrise far above the sand)) tell us the time of day. The sun has not even risen on the horizon, it is still quiet in the camp because men are likely still in their tents sleeping with some just stirring themselves from slumber, and nobody expecting anything dire to happen. It’s the height of the calm before the storm. You know something is about to happen that will squelch the idyllic tranquility being painted here.

I like the illustration of the ((gentle mist in the sticky air)) because it says that the environment the men are in is one that is humid, stifling, even at this early morning hour. The use of the word (sand) above makes me assume we could be in Africa but we could even be in a jungle type of setting in Japan. The vagueness allows for interpretation of place at this point, something I appreciate because it indicates how far from home many of these soldiers are. I also like how this engages my senses. I can feel the brush of the mist on my skin and taste the heat in the air and know that it is going to be stifling hot once the sun rises.

Ah even without the events to set up the how, I know that the ((chipped teacup smashed in a sweltering tent)) occurred because of some nefarious action. Did an enemy solider slip inside and get confronted by the tent’s occupants? Or did the enemy surprise attack the camp, opening fire with machine guns or aerial raids that caused this damage. Again, I am tempted to think about the metaphor of the teacup being a human body. I can see bodies lying on the floor of the tent with bloody pouring out from wounds in the same way that tea would pour out of that china teacup.

I like how here: ((a pop, explosion of powder)) that you use a comma to indicate a pause. It draws me into considering the pop before then engaging my olfactory senses. I can smell the burnt cordite as it mixes with the acrid stench of blood and the heat hanging upon the air. It draws me in, makes me have a physical response (revulsion) and engages my emotions (sadness, anger, fear) to the poem and for the real-life events that these words do represent. War happens and it is ugly. This exemplifies how ugly it is and how lucky most of us are to never experience it for ourselves.

Again, the uses of commas here: ((squelching contact, low, breathy gasp)) create a pause that make me consider the line and the scene that is occurring. Clearly, this is someone who has been shot and who is struggling to draw breath. The (squelching) is particularly powerful because it makes me think of blood splattering on a wall, the ground, or along something. Again, I am drawn into the piece by the word choices and my emotions engaged. I feel as if I am there at the scene and that I see the blood splatter as the bullet finds its nest in the body of a hapless (and faceless) victim.

The ((shouts and cries, sucked in the air)) indicate that battle has commenced. The two sides will continue to shoot at each other until one side is defeated. It’s the sad product of war. One must side must loose for the other to win. I again love the use of the comma here because it creates a pause that is almost like the one that would be taken for breath to be drawn in. There’s a sense of urgency here, a rushing quality that says everything is happening so quickly that it is hard for one to pause and take a decent breath.

I like how this here: ((noiseless pellets of sand caught in gaping wounds
a blanket of grit and sticky-sweet metallic red
lying under the weight of foreign bodies)) covers the bodies of those wounded by the battle. This isn’t a clean and orderly environment. They are not in the city or a hospital or even a manor house. They are out in the open where disease and predators (non-human) all dwell. Their blood stains the ground as a lasting reminder of what price was paid for freedom. Their pained cries have been captured in these grains of sands. These men died far from home, foreigners in a strange land and fighting against strangers.

The ambiguity of the speaker here: (("Good God! Hurry, get the doctor out of here!")) again plays well to show how harried things have become. I am again left to wonder if the doctor was the one shot or if his removal is because he is needed to treat those men who can still be saved. Either is possible. For me, I am inclined to think that it was our dear doctor who was shot and that they are rushing him out of there in order to save his life. But that’s me loving some angst ;)

In all I thought that this was a lovely poem that incorporated so many wonderful tools to bring a horrific scene to life without having to wax poetic about it. Fantabulous job, m’dear!

Stark images and a very strong last line

Great weaving of words the evoke feeling and emotion. Nicely done! Thank you for sharing.

Bittersweet and very beautifully conveyed. Excellent.

melancholic yellow

poor physician.

Gorgeous addition to this series!

Beautiful work:-)