Please continue, this is great.

Ahhhhhh I HHHATTTTTTEEEE MOTHER GOTHEL but please continue the story its literally made me cry in hystarics 3 times already

Hiya!

So I remember when I started reading this story, about, two years ago I believe...? And I have to say that it was one of my fav stories. Although I had forgotten about it, seeing the email in my inbox saying you had updated brought me whole bunch of memories and quite a lot of fangirling, heheh. I re-read it and now only just reminds me of how I met my love online and it makes me smile all the more! I know writers-block is terrible but I honestly can't wait to see where this story goes and how it ends! I'm rambling too much I know...but honestly, keep up the good work! I really hope you continue!

I'd love to help you edit your story, I've really enjoyed reading it. Also most of the time it's good when your work makes you cringe it generally means you've improved since then. XD

I could help you expand on the gamer aspect of it, I've played a fair amount of games myself.
One thing though is that when you change the POV it ought to be really clear.
I'm extremely good at writing cheesy/fluffy things.
A plot point you could do, is the 'LAN party' type thing they're going to have you could have another rival gamer show up? I think in general you could increase the friendly rivalry between Jack and Hiccup when they play games. Even just in like playing a new app on their phones, they should both have a bit of a competitive streak.
Also even with something as short as this you can expand it quite a bit if you're more descriptive. It makes it flow a lot more nicely as well.

AHHHHHHH YOU CAN DO IT I BELIEVE IN YOU

I'll wait for u :), keep writing!

What about a game update that could be interesting, things they add and how the characters react to it.

This is really good please write the next chapter soon. I'm addicted to fanfiction and I love this story LOL update soon SK

This is a really good story! Please continue it, this is the pinnacle of suspense.

Yas 'Gerard Way huh?' I love this

What on Earth...why does Hiccup have a condom in his prosthetic.

Er, the part with Thorston was a little hard to follow.

Oh Jack. I'm not sure yelling things like that in the phone will get you anywhere...except maybe giving the person a deaf ear. Although I don't think Thorston would be fazed by yelling.

Yay Hiccup told Jack about his prosthetic goof for him. Hiccup you should not hold back things from your bae, lol.

I'm leaving you my cellphone number in case I need advice okay
Feel free to text me whenever you want but there's no guarantee I will be able to text back right away.

( 085) 761 1232

Chat to you soon

You can call me Jake bye

awww poor jack :(

When Hiccup and Jack go to the compation could you have it Hiccup and Jack vs Pitch in one match so really a free for all but Hiccup and Jack work together against Pitch.

Just a silly though from me, just disregard it it's stupid.

Right I get it now.