Cute piece. Shampoo is a cutie here

Mi è piaciuto e stata graziosa la storia

Cute, ️

This is cute, and I loved how Shampoo tracked Ranma through all that chaos and then only found him when she'd given up. Very sweet. :)

Hehe my ship is RanmaxAkane, but this is so cute! I loved it, you portrayed Shampoo in such a cute way, and I kinda like that she had a happy ending after all the trouble to find Ranmashe deserved it lol

Really good story.

Very great story

It's was amazing!

Not only the story, but the fantastic language skills you present is beautiful!
You manage to completely make the different characters stand out as they were shown both in Manga and in the Anime! I love how much impact you make from the different kind of scenarios!

Keep up with the good work! :D

There's no way I could do it
[Obviously a double-boiler is not a well-known concept. Of course, I've had to temper chocolate and I've also never been unfortunate enough to be volentold for making chocolate from the powder]

who was covertly observing
[covertly observed is a little more concise]

Shampoo had made no secret
[‘made no’ is more concise, less passive]

isn't that precious."
[precious?”]

Soun felt a pall
[The rest of the story looks like it’s all from Shampoo’s perspective, but this is Soun’s. While some stories flip back and forth, there’s only a paragraph break here and it’s a very small aside. While either way could work, Akane’s cooking is well-known enough and Soun tends to be a terrible actor, so she could easily observe/speculate all of this. Just a note, because there’s a little drifting that gives amusing information about other characters]

pervert who even
[I think ‘who’ might not quite be the right one, but I actually think the sentence would be fine without either]

she'd made for Ranma
[made is already past tense, the had of the 'd is superfluous]

A few instances of small passive/past tense construction issues, but those are somewhat style and none actually bad grammar as much as not as strong as I think it could be. Even with those, this is a very well written story. The vague time period it takes place in helps explain Shampoo not being aware of Valentine’s Day (which is a commercial period that would be a little bit difficult to miss even if you’re not into the pseudo-melodramatic crap). A good story that shows quite a few characters acting as they plausibly should, with a quiet and completely believable moment between Shampoo and Ranma.

For being a test run this was amazing! I really, really liked it, you kept Shampoo in character, the one track mind, but you also showed the nice parts of her feelings (which most of the time get overlooked!). Great job!

Hahahaha, cute. Very cute. I love little stories like these.

Absolutely as heartwarming and fulfilling as I anticipated it to be. I expect no less from you! Everyone felt in character, the story is very believable when you consider the kind of nonsense that happens to Ranma, and Shampoo is as adorable as ever.

The pay off at the end was light, touching, and gives you that feeling of completeness that you've been waiting for since the very beginning of the story. This could easily pass for an actual holiday OVA. Very nice touch at the end.

Good stuff as always, the writing is impeccable with no edits needed. Pacing was good. GGs

-JC-

I loved this. A short yet very sweet little look into the wacky world of Ranma 1/2. Its always nice to see Shampoo get some love. She's the most likly bribly canadant for Ranma. Short of Kodachi, who has money and could easly support him. Uyko is better off without him as he just doesn't understand her at all. At least with Shampoo he would be able to continue on his never ending goal to be the best. Or Kodachi who's got the money to keep him comfortable while he continues his never ending traning. Anyway this was really very sweet and I enjoyed my read of it greatly. Thank you for sharing. :)

This was a cute story, outside of the fact that I think Shampoo already knows about Valentine's Day. I seem to remember some competition over chocolate, but it might have been another fanfiction. I also was worried Shampoo would have trouble cooking the chocolate, but she managed it okay. Which is to be expected since I don't think Shampoo's up to Ukyo or Cologne's level, but she's good. (She did prepare a whole roast pig, although inexplicably she didn't cook it - fortunately for Ryoga :D)

More importantly, you didn't bash anybody. Akane was a bad cook and in denial about her feelings for Ranma, but she wasn't psycho. (Not that there was any reason to hit any of her triggers without Ranma around) Ryoga was embarrassed at being naked, and upset over losing, but willing to help Shampoo in her search. (Too bad he COULDN'T make it back to the Tendo's, he would have had a nice time without Ranma to interfere, although Akane would be oblivious. :D) Ranma was even suspicious of the chocolate, understandable considering Shampoo's usual tricks, although for once she had nothing devious in mind.

For that alone, I think she deserved a happy ending. I'm guessing Mousse's plan was to divert Ranma so she would spend all day looking for him and come home disappointed. Mousse could then offer his consolation and hopefully be offered the chocolate instead of Ranma. (Not likely, but hope springs eternal)