That felt weird. When her mother said she couldn't wake her up, after a dream in which she tried to stay conscious as long as she could, I felt uneasy. The connection was obvious, and if the dreams could influence her so much, she should have prepared for the next ones - I would have tried, at least. Like, Japanese phrases she could use to explain the situation - "please knock me out", "if I stay awake for too long I will die" and the like. And most importantly, it feels incredibly weird that she accepted it like this - I would have screamed at whoever did this shit, because they essentially KILLED her. They say that when someone passes away, pity those who they left behind - and she left behind an entire family, and all her friends, who now will mourn her. This shit, I wouldn't have fucking forgiven.

Strange, because I usually complain about characters overreacting, rather than underreacting, but whatever. Everyone's different, I guess.

after reading the whole chapter I still can't figure out the gender of the MC but I think Mako is feminine?

Was kay a girl before going to the elemental nations ? I thought he was a boy !

I need to nope outta this fanfic. Having 2 reincarnations just ain’t my taste,sorry! _

I might run and read the first few chapters now. XD
Still,inoichi totally thought she was about to suicide. XD hahahahahah

Ah the beginning of the end, the chapter after this killed the story. Very obviouse what'll happen (TenTen is a SI) made wish you as a writer would just kill yourself, 'cause I doubt you'd rewrite anything.

Ok. I gave this a shot. I really did. I get your making a dream sequence thing, I do, but even for dreams it's just not making any kind of sense. Abstract at best, written while stoned at worst. Good luck with your writing.

Idk why find it boring?

What I don't understand is why Tsunade didn't ask Kay to give up all of her info. Tsunade knows Kay has info on Akatsuki and believes Kay spent her coma years as a ghost spying on important people. That's priceless intelligence, and neither Tsunade nor anyone else made the slightest effort to ask for information from soomeone who must know a lot. And letting Kay leave Konoha before they pumped her for information? That seems bizarre.

"AN: I'd like to thank Moka-girl for their constructive criticism. I've gone ahead and planned out my next several chapters and I'm kicking up the pacing. You've been a big help. :)"

You know I was reading and noticed that A/N. Moka-girl is me, but I changed my penname on ffnet a year and a half ago because I wanted a more mature-sounding penname. On my profile it even says my old name was Moka-girl. I looked through the reviews of your story and realized I'd read this fanfic years ago, left a few reviews, and forgot about it. Quite the amusing coincidence.

I loved her reaction to her green hair. It made me laugh.

Your story is really great! I really love it! Maybe the first few chapters needs a little bit of editing, but I kept reading it, and it really is awesome! I love the idea and the plot of it. I read all these chapters in two days because it was SO good I couldn’t stop reading! Can’t wait for the upcoming chapters!

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!

I've really enjoyed seeing how far Kay has come, especially in recent chapters. I'm also impressed that you've gotten three chapters up in close succession. Well done, I look forward to the next.

Ow. I knew her reaction wouldn't be happy go lucky, but damn. I didn't realize it hurt her that much.