Greetings peasants.

Do you think it's a coincidence that the first three numbers of our userid are 666?
Queue: Probably.
Fluffy: “Never ignore a coincidence. Unless you’re busy, in which case, always ignore a coincidence.”

FOR THOSE OF YOU CHECKING OUR PROFILE LOOKING FOR STORY UPDATE EXPLANATIONS:
(list includes all our works from both FanFiction and FictionPress)

The Adventures of Detectipolt: Ah yes, the story you're all here for (I kid, I kid). Believe it or not, we actually have plans for a couple more installments of this series, even if the concept is, well, pure crack. While we're prioritizing other stories over this, it's safe to say you can keep your eye out for more updates on this story.

Guns and Ships: Fluffy here. Imma be honest y'all. I started this story back in middle school with no clear idea where I was going with it. And now, I've kind of fallen out of love with many of the fandoms featured in that story, like Sherlock or Supernatural. It was great fun while it lasted, but alas, I was flying by the seat of my pants. Feel free to PM me if you're interested in where I was going to take the story, but otherwise, I'm afraid it's ending unfinished.

The Bloodstained Parchment: On a long hiatus. Maybe it will make a grand, majestic return someday. But today is not that day.

Across the Hall: Queue's solo project! I'm writing it as I go, but I have it planned out. I don't have an update schedule nor do I plan on making one, but hopefully the whole story will be finished... I dunno, within the year? We'll see. I might look back on that goal and laugh/cry.
Update 1/2/2020 - *looks back on that goal and cries*

Here's some basic information about each of us:

Name: Fluffy
Gender: Female
Likes/fandoms unique to her (in comparison to Queue):
—Supernatural
—Percy Jackson, Heroes of Olympus, and Magnus Chase
—GLUTEN
(Queue: Now, now, Fluffy, calm down. You see, Fluffy's family is gluten free, so she is gluten-deprived. Always.)
—desserts and pomegranates
—Marvel comics
—The Mandalorian
—Netflix's The Defenders
—tea (yeah that's right all of you filthy bean-water lovers, leaf-water is better.)
—UPDATE 12/28/17: I am now a filthy bean-water lover.
—concert band and marching band (I'm a clarinet (which is better than everyone else (screw you trumpets)))
(Queue: Okay, I won’t disagree with that last point, but I couldn’t hear the rest over the sound of my majestic bassoon honking.
Fluffy: I will shove your majestic bassoon up your- ahem.
Queue: Don’t worry, she was going to say nose.
Fluffy: Of course. . .)
House (from Hogwarts): Ravenclaw
Patronus: Marsh Harrier
Myers-Briggs Personality: INTP-A
Also, I consider myself the brains of this whole operation since I have an older FanFiction account and know how everything on here works.
(Queue: How would you like it if I just directed them over to that account so the lovely readers could read all your Warriors masterpieces?
Fluffy: I thought we were friends. And for the record, that cringey Warriors fanfic has 148 reviews. No idea how I managed it, but I did.
Queue: I don’t know whether to be impressed or very, very sad.
Fluffy: Why pick one when you can be both? :'D )

Name: Queue (It's pronounced Q, like the letter. One syllable. In this case, it means a braid of hair worn down the back... but not the traditional Manchurian hairstyle, either)
Fluffy: Yeah, you're named after the hairstyle that you hardly ever wear. Logic ammirite?
Queue: IT’S BETTER THAN KINK.
Fluffy: *winces* Ah, to go back to 7th grade, when we genuinely had no idea of the implications of that word.
Queue: Implications? More like definition.)
Gender: Female
Likes/fandoms unique to her (in comparison to Fluffy):
—BBC shows like Robin Hood (though it's been FOREVER since I watched it so I have no idea if it holds up), Father Brown, Broadchurch, Downton Abbey, and Call the Midwife
—The Great British Bake Off
—Pride & Prejudice and Emma
—The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
—bassoon and piano
—Majoring in French
—the Muppets
—Over the Garden Wall
—Les Miserables
—Shrek the Musical
—Lord of the Rings
—Fiddler on the Roof
—Portal 1 and 2
—The Last of Us
—Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton
—Rusty Lake games
—Cowboy Bebop, One Punch Man, and Fullmetal Alchemist (that’s it for animes)
—James Acaster
—Bleu Jeans Bleu
—CS Lewis
—Johnny Flynn
Her favorite YouTubers:
—Bridge Stuart
—Fairbairn Films
—Karolina Żebrowska (meme mom)
—Adrian Bliss
—Frank James
—itsamemyleo
—Blimey Cow/Jordan Taylor
—Justin Kuritzkes
Her favorite movies:
—Back to the Future
—Rocky
—The General (1926)
—Ratatouille
—Cool Runnings
—Treasure Planet
—Emma. (2020)
—Adventures in Babysitting
House (from Hogwarts): Hufflepuff
(Queue: I FIND this to be an accurate sorting.)
Myers-Briggs Personality: INFP-T
Enneagram Type: 1w9
Fluffy: And last but not least, her most prominent trait: Dumb
Queue: Says the BOX.
Fluffy: Listen buddy-

Both Queue and Fluffy are Christians.

Fandoms/likes we have in common:

—Doctor Who
—Merlin
—Sherlock
—James McAvoy
—Charlie Cox
—Harry Potter
—Umbrella Academy
—Stranger Things
—Star Wars
—The Sam Raimi Spider-Man Trilogy (pizza time) and all Spider-Man movies, basically
—Tobey in the MCU
—A Very Potter Musical
—Would I Lie To You (particularly David Mitchell)
—Disney
—Avatar the Last Airbender
—Marvel Cinematic Universe
—Marvel's Daredevil and The Punisher TV show (Please visit savedaredevil dot com (sorry, can't do links) and sign the petition, even if you don't watch the show. Do it for us.)
—*clears throat* Wonder Woman and Shazam were good...
—X-Men movies
—Star Trek (The movies. Sorry hardcore Trekkies, we couldn't get into the TV shows.)
—Blimey Cow
—vlogbrothers
—You Suck At Cooking
—Gus and Sven Johnson
—YouTube Movie/TV Show/Music Analysis Channels (Sideways, The Closer Look, Josh Keefe, etc. . .)
—Hamilton
—Veggie Tales
—Phineas and Ferb
—John Mulaney
—Newsies
—The Princess Bride
—Tarantino films
—Catch Me If You Can
—Hush
—Cool Runnings

Hello, peasants. Before this, we had a FictionPress account, and have some of our original works on it. However, we haven’t really updated it since, like, 2015, so please do not judge our current works by the content there. But if you’re really curious for whatever reason, here you go: Evil Author Overlords

We also have an account on Tumblr and Archive of Our Own under the name evilauthoroverlords.

On the origin of our name, “Evil Author Overlords:”
Disappointingly, it doesn’t have anything to do with the depravity of man or the power of authors. If you’re looking for that kind of insight, you can come up with it on your own time—or travel back in time and view our profile in 2015 (which we request you do not attempt for a multitude of reasons :) (please)). The fact is, it’s an inside joke we made in 7th grade. It’s just silly. But it stuck. It’s sort of like that poster on your wall that you can’t bear to take down because of nostalgia, and by this point, you don’t know if it would take the paint with it if you tried to rip it off. “Evil Author Overlords” is here to stay, and it could be a lot worse.

If we call you peasants is for the same reason, so don’t take it personally.

A "copy and paste" sort of thing that survived the extermination of our original profile:

1 - YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first two letters of your name and 'izzle')
Flizzle (Fluffy) and Quizzle (Queue) (Queue: Quizzle was actually my Geometry teacher from two years ago's word for a pop quiz. I wish I was kidding.)

2 - YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color and favorite animal)
Cobalt Panther (Fluffy) Navy Panda (Queue) (Queue: I must admit, Fluffy, yours rolls off the tongue a bit better than mine)

3 - YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first three letters of your last name, first two letters of your first)
Muefl (Fluffy) and Herqu (Queue) (Fluffy: Wow Queue, yours is worse than mine. . .)

4 - YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (your parents' middle names)
Diane Paul (Fluffy) Jean Gene (Queue) (Queue: Jean Gene? JEAN GENE?! Who am I, Moon Moon?!

Fluffy: More like GENE HAH up top now go see the emoji movie now on blu ray for only $22.99)

So you read through our whole profile, did you? It's not that long... Well, maybe it is, but might you consider reading the stories below as well?