Thanks to DemonFairyGirl for making my profile pic! Sadly it got cut off a bit because it was too big. :( Anyways, this thing called a profile below this, it is totally insane. You have been warned. Feel free to take anything and enjoy!

Hi! Anybody who reads this, you are getting cookies (:)(:)(:)(:)(:) blue cookies (:)(:)(:)(:) and donuts (o)(o)(o)(o)(o)(o) (be sure to give one to Blackjack!) Did anybody else realize that Blackjack never gets his donuts? Huh.) Most of my stories will be Percy Jackson related since I am a HUGE fangirl for those series. I also love Harry Potter (ever notice that the actor in the movies that plays Harry has blue eyes? Anyone?) How To Train Your Dragon is also a favorite (Did you know that there is a third movie coming out? No? Well now you know!) The Underland Chronicles are amazing too. (What?!?! You haven't read them!?!? GO TO YOUR LOCAL LIBRARY AND BORROW THEM RIGHT NOW IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THEM!!!!! DO IT!!!!!!) . Now, If you are looking at my page, you either stumbled upon it, and are randomly reading it, or, you read my story! YAAAAAY! As you have probably noticed, I love exclamation marks!!!!!!!!! I also can't spell probably right! (I used spell check. I also have problems with the word friend...) Oh! And btw I am American!

Some info about me. (random info)

lightsaber color: silver

favorite color: pink(unless it's on Umbridge... *narrows eyes*)/light blues/turquoises

level of sanity: minimal. Sometimes I am confused about what floats around in my mind...

update speed: fairly regular? Sometimes things happen that make me not able to update. Sometimes this can be classified as laziness...Others as trips to places.

stories I like to read: interesting and funny. I tend to stay in the lighthearted stuff, but occasionally I'll find one that breaks my feels...and leaves me crying for a little while

stories I don't like to read: stories that don't have punctuation. Like:

Character A: so,what's going on? said character a.

Character B: nothing much said character b.

Character C: where did i come from? asked character c looking around. (from now these characters will be referred to as Joey,(ChA) Jo-Anne,(ChB) and Bob(ChC) for no reason other than I want them to have names. They may end up in my ANs.)

I mean, seriously people, you have quotation marks for a reason, so use them!!! (for those of you who don't know what quotation marks are, they are these "".) For an example:

Joe: "Hi again!!" Joe said.

Jo-Anne: "Hi! Who are we saying hi to?"

Bob: "Do you love me?" asked Bob, giving adorable puppy dog eyes.

Me: "Of course I do Bob. I created you. Now go take a nap, all of you."

Joe, Jo-Anne, and Bob: "Ok!"

See? Quotation marks are magical and help people sort out when people are talking. That's why they were created. Also, I just realized I used a lot of space doing this. Oh well.

Magic is real. And don't you dare say otherwise. You kill a fairy every time you say you don't believe in them (which I do believe in them) which is bad. I also believe in unicorns and pegasi and alicorns (horses with wings and a horn. THEY ARE NOT CALLED PEGACORNS! IF YOU EVEN WATCHED A SECOND OF MLP OR READ A BOOK THAT SAYS IT THE PROPER WAY YOU WOULD KNOW! Sorry, I just really hate when people do that...) and dragons.

Now, ON TO THE REST OF MY AMAZING, AWESOME, MAGICAL, TIME-CONSUMING, AWESOMESAUCEICAL, LONG PROFILE! (But not as long as some peoples. But someday, I will beat them all! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!! *runs away cackling like a person who should really be in a mental asylum*)

My Favorite Pairings/Ships/Whatever-you-want-to-call-its!

Percy Jackson

Percabeth (adorable, yet deadly. Like a battle-hardened kitten. Don't believe me? Just ask the Stolls )

Caleo (so cute! Leo finally got someone! Now he needs to stop 'charming' other girls *cough* hunters,random demigods and/or mortals *cough*)

Frazel (Adorable! Like a little puppy dog!)

Jiper (I love these two but I feel so bad for Reyna...)

Tratie (I can see Aphrodite squealing over these two... "OMG! That is sooo cute! Two worst enemies together! And to think I influenced it slightly!" *cough* A WHOLE LOT *cough* "Well you certainly have a terrible cold my dear..." *glares* Whaaat? They are cute! I agree with you!

I do not approve of Thalico or anything else involving Thalia! She is a huntress people! Now go and dill with it! (No that is not a typo it is a joke. Dill pickle, deal with it?Bah forget it, you people have no sense of humor.)

The Underland Chronicles

Gluxa (cute. but then again I don't know any other pairings in this series...)

How To Train Your Dragon

Hicstrid (cute but painful. But all those punches are necessary...)

Ruffnut and Eret are never really a thing in my book. Just a huge crush. Not against it, but not for it. I'm more of a neutral party. Like a neutron. ;D

Harry Potter

Hinny (cute. But the name...Ha. The name is so funny. Hinny. Sounds like a cross between a hiccup and a whinny.But Garry isn't really much better...)

Ron and Hermione (don't know the ship name for this one. But they are still cute. I am mad at Ron and Sorry for Hermione in the Half-Blood Prince)

Before I leave this I am just going to put this out there, I FULLY SUPPORT UMBRIDGE SMASHING! DOWN WITH UMBRIDGE! GO DUMBLEDORE'S ARMY!!

H2O Just Add Water

Clewis (cute. just a little to sciencey. It was so sad when they broke up in season 2... but I was so happy in season 3!)

Emma and Ash (Pretty cute. Once again I don't know the ship name. We only got one season of this.)

Will and Bella (Cute. I don't know the ship name again. Too bad we only got one season again.)

I do not approve of Charlotte and Lewis! Just because Charlotte is a mermaid doesn't give her the right to abuse her powers! And just because her grandmother was a mermaid doesn't mean she is supreme mermaid! And she only has three powers because of a fluke. That also doesn't make her supreme mermaid! She deserved to lose her powers!!

I have something really cool for all you Percy Jackson fans out there. Just follow the steps and you will be rewarded. You ready?

Step 1:Go to Google Translate

Step 2:Set the Translations to English-Greek

Step 3:Type in the box "Will Percy Jackson ever die"

Step 4:Highlight the Greek translation and hit copy

Step 5:Switch the Translations to Greek-English

Step 6:Paste the Greek translation in the box

Step 7:Read the English translation

Step 8:Flip out because it is so awesome.

I know it is long but just do it. I did not figure that out. I found it on Google. Also, you can do that with any Character. I checked. It doesn't work if you put it in Latin though. I checked that too. :( For all of you people out there who didn't follow the steps, I am not telling you what it says. You will have to figure it out yourselves!!! ;D

PJO FANS: MUST have this on their profile!

NORMAL PEOPLE: Rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast

PJO FANS: Will tell Zeus to make it rain

NORMAL PEOPLE: Say OMG!

PJO FANS: Say OH MY GODS!

NORMAL PEOPLE: Go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings

PJO FANS: Won't go to one because they will take away their awesome demigod powers

NORMAL PEOPLE: Say shut up or i'll tell on you!

PJO FANS: Say shut up or my godly parent will vaporize you!

NORMAL PEOPLE: Think that PJO fans are stupid

PJO FANS: Know that normal people are stupid

NORMAL PEOPLE: When being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!

PJO FANS: When being chased use their demigod powers

NORMAL PEOPLE: Get nervous/scared during thunderstorms

PJO FANS: Yell at Zeus to calm down

NORMAL PEOPLE: Would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation

PJO FANS: Would try and find Camp Half Blood

NORMAL PEOPLE: Don't have this on their profile

PJO FANS: Would have this on their profile already

I copied this from PJoHoOFan's profile.

Things I am not to do at Hogwarts

1) I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss.

2) Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda.( Of course not!!!! He's not green,or wrinkly, or 900 years old, or very very wise!)

3) I will not give Hagrid Pokémon cards and convince him they're real animals. (Not even if I really want to?)

4) I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin Quidditch matches.

5) When Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Batmobile, Robin!" (What if I know Robin...?)

6) Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is simply coincidental. (How do you know that? Have you studied the Nazgul and Dementor family trees? Well I haven't either...)

7) I will not refer to the Weasley Twins as "bookends."

8) I will not scare the Arithmacy students with my Calculus book. (Fine them. I'll go scare the other students with my GIANT BOOKS!!!)

9) I will not hold my wand in the air before I casting spells shouting "I got the power!" (But-but- He-man!)

10) I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs. (...Are the Weasley Twins allowed?)

11) I will not slip Malfoy a Love Potion in his morning goblet of Pumpkin Juice. (Not even if I direct it towards his true love? WHAT? IT'S NOT ME! I don't love him!)

12) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.

13) I will not call Dumbledore "Santa Claus!" during the Christmas Holidays.

14) I will not put Muggle fairy book in the History section at the library. (Hmph.)

15) I will not send Snape a bottle of shampoo for Christmas. (He needs to wash his hair!)

16) I am not allowed to tell Hufflepuffs there is no Santa Claus.

17) I am not allowed to refer to myself as the New Dark Lord.

18) I am not allowed to sneak into Professor Snape's private chambers to watch him sing I Will Survive in the mirror, as it is disturbing.(*shudder* even thinking about it... and it didn't help him survive in the end either...)

19) I am not allowed to steal Professor Flitwicks wand, hold it over my head, and laugh as he tries to reach it.

20) I will not replace Madam Pomfrey's Skele-Gro with pumpkin juice. (But it tastes better...)

21) I will not replace Professor Snape's pumpkin juice with Skele-Gro.

22) I will not impersonate the Swedish Chef in Potions class. (Rn den wr ard thr grllywrd tr dr rst...[I'm sorry if I have offended anyone in any way with that sentence.])

23) The next time that I see Rita Skeeter, I am not to threaten her with a can of Raid. (Arrg!! *throws can away*)

24) I will not subvert the lock on the fourth-floor girls' bathroom and sell its location to first-years as "The Chamber of Secrets".

25) When applying for a post at the Ministry of Magic after graduation, I should not cite "Fred and George Weasley" as my greatest influence at Hogwarts.(Hmph.*brightens* *starts to scribble*)

26) Putting down "Lord Voldemort" is probably not best either.(ARRG!!! *erases*)

27) A Muggle "vacuum cleaner" is not acceptable Quidditch equipment, even if it has been enchanted to fly. (But why not?)

28) Hogsmeade village is not "a wretched hive of scum and villainy." (Of course not... just the Hog's Head!)

29) I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I prophesied her death.(*glares*)

30) I will also not tell Professor Trelawney that I had a vision of her killing the Dark Lord.

31.) Sending rings to the nine senior faculty at Yuletide, with the return address "Voldemort", is not funny. (Yes it is!)

32) Insisting that the school acquire computers and network the buildings is a pointless request as they claim that a quill and parchment is sufficient. (But then I can't update Fanfiction!)

33) Calling in the Ghostbusters is a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists. (WHO YOU GONNA CALL? GHOSTBUSTERS!!!)

34) I may not have a private army.(Poop.)

35) I must not substitute chocolate-flavoured laxative for Professor Lupin's prescription-strength chocolate.

36) Nor am I to in any way substitute, alter, hide, or otherwise tamper with Professor Dumbledore's candy. (...Trick or Treat?)

37) I am not the wicked witch of the west.

38) -I will not refer to Professor Umbridge as such either.

39) I will not melt if water is poured over me.

40) -Neither will Professor Umbridge. (Are you sure?)

41) I shouldn't use Photoshop to create incriminating photos of my house prefects or tutors.

42) I will not enchant the Golden Snitch to fly up the nearest fan's nose. (How would it fit?)

43) I do not know the Avada Kedavra curse, and pretending I do to people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover. (Aww...)

44) I will not test my Potions assignments by spiking Snape's drink with them.

45) - Especially not all of them at once.

46) I will not try to hock off my old piercings as "priceless Muggle artifacts."

47) I will not claim my X-Files tapes are "Auror Training Videos."

48) Professor Snape definitely does not have pointed ears, and under no circumstances is he to be addressed as 'Spock'.

49) I am not able to see the Grim Reaper, nor am I to claim that he is standing by the Headmaster, tapping an hourglass and looking at him impatiently. Or, for that matter, Harry Potter.

50) When being interrogated by a member of staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce 'These are not the droids you are looking for'. (I can use the force though!)

51) Thestrals do not resemble the Muggle toys known as 'My Little Pony'. (Are you sure? Can you even see them?)

52) The four Houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Smarts and the Junior Death Eaters.

53) Despite my personal beliefs, Quidditch would not be improved by the introduction of Muggle firearms. (Aw...not even if they were enchanted to shoot rainbows and candy?)

54) Though they are doubtless more athletic, battle-axes are not acceptable either. (Not even if they're Nerf axes?...)

55) I will not claim there is a prequel to Hogwarts, A History that explains about Bilbo Baggins.

56) I will not use the Marauder's Map for stalking purposes.

57) I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing.

58) I am not allowed to ask Professor Dumbledore if the size of his beard is 'compensating for something'.

59) I will not create a betting pool that Voldemort is Harry Potter's father.

60) Headmaster Dumbledore is of no relation to Willy Wonka.

61) Professor Snape's proper given name is not Princess Silvermoon Fairywing Glimmer McSparkles.

62) Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are not the magical equivalent of "Batman and Robin". (Of course not! They're not dark enough! Maybe Voldemort...just need to get him to be sort of good...)

63) I will not play the Imperial March theme for Professor Snape.

64) However, when Lucius Malfoy visits, I may play it. ( I would never give such an honor to such a-a- NEVER!!)

65) If I insist on carrying out my plans of producing "Riddle-de-dee: The Voldemort Musical", I will do so under a nom-de-plume.

66) I will not attempt to recruit the title character to play himself. Even if he looks good in tap shoes.

67) I should not refer to Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle collectively as "Team Rocket" either. (If I can get them to say the motto can I?)

68) I am not allowed to discuss my theory that Voldemort is actually the second cousin of Sauron.

69) I am not a 'ninja sent here by Lord Voldemort to destroy Harry Potter' and should stop shouting this at meal times.('course not! Just a ninja! My mission is a secret... *jumps out of window onto dragon and flies away while battling other ninjas on the backs of dragons*)

70) It’s not tasteful to approach Cho wearing a shirt that says "All The Good-Looking Ones Die Young" with a picture of Cedric Diggory on it.

71) I will not yell "Hey look! It’s Lord Voldemort!" at Hogsmeade.

72) I will not tease Voldemort about the time he needed his pink flowery teddy bear to comfort him when he had that bad, bad nightmare about Harry.

73) I will not charm a poster of Britney Spears on Draco's wall. (...What about Justin Beiber?)

74) I am not allowed to begin each Herbology class by singing the theme song to “Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.”

75) I will not call Professor McGonagall “McGoogle”.

76) I will not sing the entire Multiplication Rocks series during Arithmancy exams.

77) There is no such thing as the Chamber of Double Secret Probation.

78) My name is not “the Dark Lord Happy-Pants,” and I am not allowed to sign my papers as such. (I already did that in Math!(I'm seriously not kidding.))

79) Bringing fortune cookies to Divination class does not count for extra credit. (Why not? Even if they've been altered by Nemesis?)

80) I will not douse Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak with lemon juice to see if he will become visible while wearing it and standing by the fire in the common room. (But whyyyyyy?)

81) I will not tell first years they should build a tree house in the Whomping Willow.(Can I go to the Screaming Shack and scream at the top of my lungs when the third years come near?)

82) I will not teach the house elves to impersonate Jar Jar Binks. (But it would be funny!)

83) I will not give Gryffindors pixie sticks. (What if I am a Griffindor and you have rules about having to have enough for everyone in the common room...?)

84) I am not allowed to refer to Susan Bones, Hannah Abbot, and Justin Finch-Fletchley as Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles.

85) A time turner is not a flux capacitator. I should therefore not try to install it in a Muggle car. (But I want to do Back to the Future!)

86) I shall not refer to DADA professors as canaries in a coal mine.

87) When fighting Death Eaters in the annual June good vs. evil fight, I will not lift my wand skyward and shout “There can only be ONE”.

88) A wand is for magic only, it is not for picking noses, playing snooker, or playing drums. No matter how bored I become. (Lightsabers)

89) It is generally accepted that cats and dragons cannot interbreed, and I should not attempt to disprove this theory no matter how wicked the results would be.(I want a catdragon though...)

90) 42 is not the answer to every question on the O.W.L.S. (Are you absolutely sure...?)

91) I am allowed to have a cat, rat, toad, or an owl. I am not allowed to have reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha. (What about a unicorn? Or a catdragon?)

92) No matter how good an Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.

93) I will not refer to the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor as Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.

94) Dumbledore is not Gandalf, and the Triforce is not hidden in Hogwarts.

95) Do not confuse Aragorn, Eragon and Aragog. Ever. (O.o)

96) I may not introduce Nagini to Indiana Jones. (My brother would be pretty mad about that...)

97) Challenging Ron to a slug-eating contest is just mean.

98) Under no circumstances am I allowed to refer to Voldemort as "Baldy".

99) Even if he is.

100) I am not allowed to tell the first years to have a staring contest with the Basilisk.

101) I am prohibited from sprinkling glitter on Draco Malfoy, dying his hair, and call him Edward.

102) I am not allowed to sell Mrs. O'Leary to Hagrid. (I need Mrs.O'Leary for other purposes anyways...plus Percy would probably kill me.)

103) I will not give Professor Lupin a collar as a Christmas or birthday present.

104) Saying "I think I 'taw a puddytat!" every time I see Professor McGonagall is most certainly NOT allowed.

105) Offering Voldemort a colonial-era powdered wig (complete with ponytail) will not amuse him and I am not allowed to do so, even if he needs a new hairdo.

106) I am not allowed to paint the school neon pink as the only person it will amuse is Professor Umbridge. (You're right... can I paint it rainbow?)

107) I must not introduce Voldemort to a psychiatrist as it is likely to result in him having a temper tantrum.

108) I am not allowed to introduce the Cullens to Professor Lupin.

109) I am not allowed to tease Professor Lupin about his 'time of the month'.

110) I shall not play match-maker for Voldemort on Valentine's Day because it will only make him cry when no one will go out with him because of his lack of hair.

111) I am not allowed to be a match-maker for Shelob and Aragog either.

112) I will not arrange a battle to the death between nine Hungarian Horntails and the Nazgul.

113) I will not scream, "HIS NAME IS EDWARD!" any time I hear the words Cedric Diggory.

114) I will not ask the centaurs if they know where Chiron is because I have found a demigod

115) I will not shout at dinner times that Darth Sidious is Voldemort's uncle, even if they do look alike.

116) I shall not try to persuade everyone that Percy Weasley's true name is Percy Jackson and he slays monsters with a pen for a living. (He's not! The Weasley's were right about him! Well, until the Battle of Hogwarts...)

117) I will not sing 'I'm a Survivor' after the Battle of Hogwarts. (But I am a survivor! And haven't you ever heard of comic relief?)

118) No matter how fun it looks, I will not stand on a table and do the Macarena at the Yule Ball. (What if everybody else is doing it too...?)

119) Professor Lupin is not the magical equivlant of Wolverine and I am not allowed to address him as such. (Can I introduce Wolverine to Batman? I have a feeling they would get along well. After the first time they meet when they try to kill each other of course. Because that's what they're like.)

120) Even if I'm bored, I am not allowed to ask Snape what the mysterious ticking noise is.

121) I will not dye Harry's hair pink or give him brown contacts, just because I am sick of black-haired, green-eyed heroes.

122) Whether they owe me money or not, I am not allowed to sneak into Fred and George's dorm at the dead of night to die their hair blond, spike it unreasonably high, then call them John and Edward in the morning.

123) I will not send Voldemort white robes for Christmas and claim he changed his name to, "Voldy the White."

124) And when he wears them, I am not allowed to run around Hogsmeade screaming, "AHHH! It's an albino Dementor!"

125) It is not tasteful to send Professor McGonagall a scratching post for Christmas.

126) Bringing a Magic 8 ball to Divination class will only get Professor Trelawney annoyed at your "lack of Inner Eye."

127) To which I am not allowed to reply.

128) I will not refer to the Accio charm as 'The Force'. (But I finally can have it! ...Sort of. But everybody will think I do! If I hide my wand in my sleeve!)

129) Nor am I allowed to have lightsaber fights with my wand and make whoosing noises. (Teach me how to make the lightsaber come out of my wand and we'll talk)

130) "Because they both need to wash their hair" is not proof Professor Snape and Aragorn are related.

131) There is also no proof that Gimli and Flitwick are related and I am stop asking Flitwick if he's been swimming with any hairy women lately.

132) Singing 'Hungry Like The Wolf' in Professor Lupin's class is not a way to get extra credit.

133) I am not allowed to write on the wall in the Gryffindor Common Room, "I know where you live" or "I stole all your underwear!"

134) I am not allowed to replace the Bludgers with peas, tomatoes, plums or anything that is not a Bludger.

135) Portable swamps are not funny.

136) And I will not set off the above in Snape's sleeping quarters.

137) Or in the Slytherin's bathrooms.

138) In fact, I am not allowed to even buy portable swamps.

139) Harry Potter is not a Son of Poseidon and saying this every time I see him will only result in him filing a restraining order against me.

140) My patronus is not a Nazgul.

141) Neither is my animagus form. (Did we cover the fact it's a cat-dragon?)

142) "To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not an appropriate career choice. (Aww...but I could tell them to kidnap Umbridge...)

143) It still is not appropiate, even if I have subsituted the flying monkeys with gummy bears.(Now you're just killing everything I've ever dreamed of doing...)

144) I will not levitate everywhere in a big pink bubble.

145) My professors have neither the time, nor the inclination to hear about what I did with six boxes of Sugar Quills.

146) No part of the school uniform is edible. (But what if I make it edible?)

147) Nor am I allowed to make any part of the school uniform edible. (You're too good at getting rid of loopholes)

148) I will not try to take house points from the first years for "being too goddamned short". (What if it's a 5th year who's that short?)

149) Especially as I am in no position of authority and Dumbledore would have to be heavily drugged before he would ever make me a prefect. (Where's my stock of drugs...)

150) I am not allowed to wear singing holiday-themed ties and claim that they are officially part of my uniform. Especially not during June. (But I want one that sings Jingle Bells! If you won't let me wear them I'll just sing them anyways! *mutters* fine. I'll get them of the School's Black Market.)

151) Luna Lovegood does not have pointed ears, nor is she to be addressed as 'Galadriel'.

152) Lucius Malfoy also does not have pointed ears, nor is he to be addressed as 'Haldir'.

153) I am not the reincarnation of Merlin.

154) I am not allowed to Accio the clothing of any person while they are wearing it.

155) I am to attend astronomy class and should stop yelling that aliens will abduct me if I do.

156) Hogwarts does not require a karaoke machine.

157) No matter how much I would enjoy watching Harry sing "Saturday Night."

158) "Defying my will" is not a crime worthy of life in Azkaban, and I should not tell that to the first-years.

159) I will not speak to Professor Snape with a Transylvanian accent.

160) Nor am I to ask if he is Carlisle Cullen's evil, unfortunate-looking twin.

161) I will not start a rumor saying that Professor Snape sings "I'm too sexy for my robes" while showering. Or for that matter doing any other activity.(O.o)

162) Enchanting the Sorting Hat to sort new students into the House of Martok, or any other Klingon house is forbidden.

163) Voldemort does not wish to appear as the 'before' for a line of cosmetics. And no, he does not care how much money I make from it.

164) The Slytherin prefect is named Draco Malfoy, not "Rocky Horror".

165) Transfiguring Draco Malfoy's uniform into a gold thong is also inappropriate.

166) I will not attempt to determine whether Malfoy is a natural blond.

167) I will not sprend rumors that Legolas Greenleaf is his second cousin either.

168) Luna Lovegood is NOT always on "psychedelic mushrooms" and I should stop implying that she is.

169) The same goes for Professor Trelawney.

170) I will not get a tattoo of a smiley face on my arm and claim that it is the new Dark Mark.

171) I will not set my robes on fire to get out of potions. (I will set someone else's robes on fire then... *cough* Snape *cough*)

172) I should not be a sports' commentator for Ron and Hermione's arguments.

173) Hogwarts does not need a "This many days since Harry has almost died" sign. (It doesn't...? What about Hagrid's Cabin?)

174) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.

175) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office. (I can. And I will. And I will spin while I skip and sing. It's called multitasking.)

176) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

177) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show you the pointy hat trick.

178) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar.

179) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after my lucky charms"

180) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's tasteless, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

181) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month".

182) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand. (...first I need to find the spell)

183) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot. (I'VE ALREADY DONE IT!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!)

184) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, I will assume that I am not allowed to use it.

185) I will not lock the Slytherin's and Gryffindor's in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive. (It'll be good for us to get along...as long as I'm not in there!)

186) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.

187) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day". (*nods* *steeples fingers* It will be an unofficial holiday. Or I could get someone else to make it official... EEE! SLYTHERIN!! HUUUUUGZ!!! *hugs very startled Slytherin and skips off down hallway*)

188) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.(Fine. I'll sing 'Mission Impossible' Du nu nuh, nu nu nuh...*slinks off down hallway)

189) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor. (But... I'm in Griffindor... I'LL TAKE THE POINTS AWAY FROM HIM!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!)

190) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort.

191) Even though he needs one. (Nooo, he needs a complete soul. :D)

192) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy.

193) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.

194) It is not necessary to yell "BAM" every time I Apparate. (Are you sure? My friends won't know who I am if I don't...)

195) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways. (*pouts*)

196) I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor shall I insist that their colors indicate that they're "covered in bees."

197) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge. (...It isn't?)

198) If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm. (*Takes out sparkly pen* *draws smiley face on sleeping classmate's arm* *looks up* What? You said I couldn't draw the Dark Mark on anyone's arm. You never said anything about smiley faces!)

199) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers. (Of course not! I'm not an official member of SPEW, but I would never abuse a house elf! *in background* Hermione: "Did someone just say SPEW?? IT'S S.P.E.W.!! Also, would this person like to join?" Me: RUN!)

200) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion. (Whaaaat? I have dry hands...)

201) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween. (Why not? I want to see what happens? If you won't let me, I'll dress up another student...)

202) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself too seriously.

203) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knights Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions. (But it sounds fun!)

204) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet. (POTATOES!! ATTACK THE UNBELIEVER! YAAAAAAAH! [Thus commenced the epic battle of the potatoes])

205) I will not attack my fellow classmates.(*droops* Aw...)

206) I will not make an impossible riddle for people to give an answer to enter the Ravenclaw area.

207) When signing to all of these rules, I am not allowed to write in red ink and say that the Cullens lent me some grizzly bear blood

I stole this from PJoHoOFan, who stole it from KJtheELMtree.

38 Ways to annoy Darth Vader (Turns out it's actually only 36. And before you ask why I did this, it's because I had to. It's so awesome!)

Surefire ways to get yourself killed, or at least Force-Choked a few times. That is if you can get close enough to do most of this stuff. (I find quite a few of these really funny.)
1. Call him Ani.
2. Tell him you've taken up podracing as a hobby. Ask him to give you lessons.
3. Ask him if he ever knew, "A cute senator from Naboo." If he says something or stays silent, say, "Ooh, Ani's got a girlfriend!"
4. Walk around tripping every other step. If he asks you what you're doing, say, "Mesa Jar Jar Binks!"
5. Imitate his breathing.
6. Steal his lightsaber and replace it with a hot pink one.
7. Blame it on Tarkin.
8. Ask him if he was ever arrested for child abuse.
9. When he does something really evil, shake your finger and say, "Now, now, Ani, would your mother approve of that?"
10. Have emotional conversations with him. Bring up Qui-Gon.
11. Follow him around singing "I Know a Song that gets on Everybody's Nerves."
12. Ask him how he goes to the bathroom in that suit.
13. Paint his TIE fighter yellow.
14. Stare at him. When he asks you what you're doing, say that you can't see how an evil jerk like him could've ever been a Jedi.
15. Throw mashed potatoes at him.
16. Whistle in his ear. When he comes after you, hide behind a stormtrooper.
17. Poke his shoulder.
18. Call him an "evil creep with a dysfunctional family."
19. Tell him he looks like a droid.
20. Sign him up for a quilting class.
21. Make up words to the Imperial March (Vader’s Theme). Sing them whenever he enters a room.
22. Jab him with a stick.
23. Talk like Yoda all the time.
24. Ask him to play Battlefront with you. If he does, make him be the Rebels.
25. Tell him his mask looks stupid.
26: Ask him if he's seen Obi-Wan lately.
27: Stick refrigerator magnets to him.
28: Follow him around talking about the similarities between his life and Avatar: the Last Airbender.
29: Talk about how his life was like Luke's. Say, "It's almost like you're related!"
30: Tell him that you find his son attractive.
31: Ask him if he likes twins.
32: Whenever he gets close to you, pretend that you're being Force-choked. Loudly.
33: Have a loud conversation with a wall when he's nearby. If he asks you what you're doing, say that you're talking to Qui-Gon and that he's very disappointed.
34: Call him Dear Old Darthy, especially when you're near someone.
35: Ask him if he wants to buy some death sticks. Be sure to talk like that guy in the bar in Episode II who tried to sell some to Obi-Wan.

36: After doing number 30, tell him that you dumped Luke for Jabba the Hutt.

I Can Read It!

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile!

I took this from PJoHoOFan too.

Six truths in life

1. You cannot stick your tongue out and look up at the ceiling at the same time: a physical impossibility

2. All idiots, after reading this will try it

3. And discover that it's a lie

4. You are smiling now because you are an idiot.

5. You will soon post this on your profile for another idiot to see.

6. There is still a stupid smile on your face.

I sincerely apologize about this but I am an idiot and i needed company =)

If you count as an idiot, post this onto your profile!

This too. PJoHoOFan, you are not alone! I'm a dog too! (Mr.Peabody and Sherman Reference)

Random thing my brain just came up with... I call it...you ready for this? Okay...If you're sure...Are you sure you're sure? Okay, Okay, you're sure, now here it is...

!!!The RANDOMNESS Pledge!!!

I, CHBNewRomeHogwartsBerk, pledge to put fruity cheerios in every fanfiction that I will write, just because I can and they are awesomesauceical.

Repost this on your profile if you like it in this format:

I,(penname goes here), pledge to put (random thing you like that can fit in a lot of things) in every fanfiction that I will write, just because I can and they are awesomesauceical. (Yes, I came up with awesomesauceical in my own brain, no applause please.)

Achievements

I am bored. Don't ask questions. If you do, I will smite you. (depending on the question...)

A1: Post a one-shot ACHEVEMENT EARNED!!!!

A2: Ramble in a disclaimer ACHEVEMENT EARNED!!!

A3: Finish your first story

A4: Challenge someone to a RANDOM POOL NOODLE FIGHT! (don't ask...it failed *runs off sobbing dramatically*) ACHEVEMENT EARNED!!!

A5: Act like you're insane ACHEVEMENT EARNED!!! (outside of fanfiction. at school. with my friiieeennnds *maniac smile*)

A6: Use lots and lots and lots of exclamation points!!!!!!! ACHEVEMENT EARNED!!!

A7: Smiley face. All you need to know. :D ACHEVEMENT EARNED!!!!

Well...ok. I'll put more on when I think of some. Feel free to borrow *cough* steal *cough* this. Add your own achievements too!!!!! ;D :D

Random Things.
Why? You ask. The answer is Because. Because why? Because Because. That's why. I just blew your mind. I think it's on the moon. Or on that lady's head. Not sure. Wait... Half on the moon half on the lady's head. Oh, she's coming over here. Bye! *poof*

Quick! Whats the number for 9-1-1? Um... 1-1-9? Nooooo! You've killed us all!

The gummy bears and I have a plan to take over the world! But don't tell! It's a secret!

What do you mean I'm staring at you? I'm staring at the wall behind you with my X-ray powers!

I didn't slap you, I hi-fived your face.

"It's not my fault!" "It's your face's fault."-quote from Star Wars Rebels, Zeb and Ezra in Idiot's Array.

"With great power comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later."-Quote from Percy Jackson. Nico di Angelo

I'm bored. You are too? Let's be bored together! This is awesome! (five seconds later) I'm bored still.

I have magical powers. But I'm not allowed to show them to you. It's not allowed.

When someone at school you don't really know/like asks you what your fanfiction is about: "That's confidential information." *Backs away holding binder with fanfiction in it* "My precious...my precious..." *strokes binder*

Did you know that the average american reads only 3 books a year! Only 3. I would never be able to survive that. Reading is LIFE FOR ME. UP THERE WITH FOOD AND WATER AND SHELTER. 3 BOOKS. WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?

What you do when your friend won't trade her pineapples for your apple and then proceeds to later ask your other friends if they want your pineapple while they overly refuse it: Grab the apple you're eating and go sit at the empty table behind you facing them and yell "I hate you! I hate you all!" Half-jokingly at them. Then go back and sit with them once they give you the pineapple because they're your friends. And your stuff is over there.

I saw this on Google Images today:

Jason never dared to ask Percy if he could borrow a pen, not after the first time. Percy had handed him Riptide without knowing, right in the middle of their exam, and Jason had gotten a 0 for his test for disrupting the class by screaming and throwing the pen across the classroom.

LOL.

I saw this at an ice cream place today and it will be my second motto. My first is 'Fish Are Friends, Not Food.'

You can't buy happiness,

but you can buy ice cream,

& that's pretty much the same thing.

See? that is just so true!

Guys, I watched Antman today. It. Was. AWESOME! No spoilers for those who haven't watched it. For those who have, my favorite scene was the Thomas the Tank Engine Battle. Choo! Choo! AAH! Thunk. Oh my gosh that part was awesome. Well, more like hilarious. Antony was so sad! I, (and Scott) will always remember you Antony! (He may end up in a fanfiction I am sorta-kinda planning. hint hint (yeah not. Got a waaaay better idea... B) )) My dad was all like "That's why he gave them numbers! Don't get attached because their all gonna die!" I was like 'That's so mean!' in my head. But I love my dad! )ll( ...That doesn't look right... ll That looks better! :D It's a bye-bye for now!

New Words

This was inspired by my other little brother, SockMonkeyJones.

Stupidizing- To make yourself or another person stupid (or more stupid)

Thanks for checking out my profile!!

CHBNewRomeHogwartsBerk