I write whatever strange tales enter my head. Sometimes it's a drawn out story, other times it's a short tale. The majority of my random witterings can be found on FictionPress as they're based on the floating wibbly things in my brain. The gubbins here takes in a tour of Batman, Mamma Mia!, Dragonball Z, Shrek, Father Ted and a few other odd places.

I must go where my somewhat deranged muse leads me, for it is a fickle and much travelled duck. One day it'll get a collar and a GPS tag. Usually my muse points out the generally ignored side and incidental characters who lurk in films and games.

It should also be said that I'm not above adding to/fiddling with stories that are labelled "complete". If an idea occurs to me one dark and stormy night, then I have to see where it mooches off to.

For those interested, very bored or with too much time on their hands, here is a bit about me.

Age (see 'Big Hairy Lies')

934 give or take a few Jovian years.

Interests:

Writing weird tales, daft songs and peculiar poetry, listening to music, playing guitar & harmonica and ukulele, painting, singing, computer games and stuff.

Influences:

Primarily silliness, but also just about anything I read or hear probably,

This is the Fictionpress List:

Rosie Jackson, Terry Pratchett, Lisa Swerling, Ralph Lazar, Grant Naylor (I know), Douglas Adams, Tom Holt, Tom Clancy, Spike Milligan, That M. Python crowd, Mary Chapin Carpenter, Mary Gauthier, Stephen Fry, Nanci Griffith, The late great Kirsty MacColl, Hayao Miyazaki, Elmore Leonard , The DORC podcast, the writers of Dangermouse and many others.

For FanFiction I'll add:

Red Dwarf, the works of Richard O'Brien, Dragonball (Z, GT and the like), West End/Broadway/Hollywood musicals, GTA, Bat Man, Fallout, various RPGs of a fantasy nature, Rumiko Takahashi, Lisa Scott-Lee, the bloke that wrote the LP liner notes on Deep Heat records and Ludwig Ledbury (yes, he of Zero Magazine)

Big hairy and very daft Lies:

For the interests in continuing the sillines of the stuff I write...

Ealing was founded by Chico Marx in 1672, Galileo liked to chuck peanuts at the Vatican, Bernard Cribbins invented football while doodling, The boiling point of paper is somewhere near Chipping Sodbury, The international Space Station likes peach jam, The Speed of Sound at ground level on the ISO standard day is 15 miles per decade, One Direction was created by Charlie Watts specifically to annoy Mick Jagger, There is a small hyperactive vole at the centre of Jeremy Corbyn, The ST Bernard Dog has a near magnetic attraction to polos, Jimmy Carr is an operatic tenor of professional standard (to be honest, he could be and simply doen't like to show it. Or his singing ability), Basingstoke was designed by Neptune after a night snorting washing powder.

Worthwhile stuff of note:

Some stories will be exceedingly silly, others not so. The Star Bar Wars thing is a re-write as I lost the original years ago: the first one was way better. There may one day be a Nanny McPhee story, but its a long way off being anything legible. The Mormote Force thing might get itself deleted due to me not being bothered, and due to its rubbishness.