I will always take a story request. I've found my best work is written when I'm writing it for someone else. So PM me if you want a story-gift.

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England nor French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? If teachers taught, why don't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue?

Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and wise guy are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?

Have you noticed that we talk about certain things only when they are absent? Have you ever seen a horseful carriage or a strapful gown? Met a sung hero or experienced requited love? Have you ever run into someone who was combobulated, gruntled, ruly or peccable? And where are all those people who ARE spring chickens or who would ACTUALLY hurt a fly?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm clock goes off by going on. English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all). That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it.

- Richard Lederer

Current WIPs:

No Accident - This one's a cannon compliant but also rather unlikely story of the Seventieth Hunger Games, in which rebellion is afoot before the Girl on Fire ever set foot in an arena. Currently, it is undergoing characterization and plot edits. It is priority #2.

Running Through the Districts one shot series - This is a series of separate one shots, each following a character or characters (victor, tribute, civilian, rebel) from an individual district. They don't all need to be read to understand what's going on in them. Each stands alone and can be read as such but does loosely exist as part of a whole.

So far, this series has the following stories posted:

District One: Thy Rod and thy Staff, which is in Gloss' POV, following the events that led up to his Games, including Cashmere's.

The story for this series that I am currently working on is:

District Four: Mal Pris, which is in Mags' POV and outlines her Games, taking note of the differences between the rocky protocol back then versus the clockwork one that we all see in The Hunger Games. It will need to be split into three chapters (so I guess it's technically not a one shot. Whatever...), and is considered priority #1.

Guidance one shot series - A modern AU series staring the Fire Nation children. So far, Apathy (Mai) and Perfectionism (Azula) have been posted. The other two are still in the works and considered priority #3.