i love country music, reading, and writing. im obsessed with maximum ride and percy jackson.

im not ganna rite many stories(if i rite any at all), but i do adveritize stories/authors i like.

favorites

#:97

color:blue

subjects:reading and writing(duh)

food:tatter-tots

movies:robinhood-men in tights

maximum ride character:fang

percy jackson character:annabeth

house of night: stark

season:winter

extras

READ AND REVIEW FangPlusMeEqualsNinja's Godly Flight:

http://www.fanfiction.ws/s/5739392/1/Godly_Flight

If you have read the entire Maximum Ride series in a day, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you temporarily shunned your best friend when she said that she didn't like Maximum Ride, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you DON'T check under the bed for monsters, but you DO check behind the shower curtain for monsters/murderers/Michael Jackson, copy this into your profile

If you've ever screamed at a book or the TV copy this!

If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile

95 Percent Of Teens Would Have A Breakdown If they saw Miley Cyrus standing ontop of the Empire State Building about to jump,Copy and paste if your one of the 5 that will be yelling "JUMP JUMP!!"

If a random song has ever popped into your head for no reason at all- copy and paste this into your profile.

-If you've ever burst out laughing while reading a book and people look at you funny-copy and paste this into your profile.

-If you've ever sang "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves"-copy and paste this into your profile.

If you secretly hoped to get a letter from Hogwarts when you were 11, copy and paste this to your profile

PREP

X You own a cell phone.
X You own something from Abercrombie.
X You own something from Pac sun.
X You own something from Hollister.
X You own something from American eagle.
X You love/like going to the mall.
X You own an iPod/MP3 player.
X You love Starbucks.
x you have been called a brat.
X You hate buying things that are on sale.
X You have more than one house.

Total: 7

GOTHIC

X Black is one of your favourite colors.
X You have thought about death.
X You wear chains.
X You like heavy metal.
X You’ve shopped at Hot Topic.
X You have worn black lipstick.
X Your hair was/is dark.
X You dislike preps.
x you’re an atheist/ Satanist/agnostic.

Total: 6

PUNK

X You can skateboard
x you’ve worn plaid.
X You like Converse.
X You hate MTV.
X You have/had blue, pink, red, purple, or green hair. - (streaks count)
x you dislike pink.
X You hate/dislike preps.
x you wear/wore skateboarding shoes.

Total: 6

GEEK

X You love the computer.
X You like Harry Potter.(i dont love them but i love their accents)
X You are supposed to wear glasses/contacts
x you get straight A's.
X You love/like reading.
X You were/are in band. (Yeah I'm in band. Who cares? TENNOR SAXAPHONES RULE!!)
X You don't care what you look like.
X You have a curfew.(that doesnt mean i follow it)
X You always do your homework.
X You never miss school unless you're sick.

Total: 6

ATHLETIC

X You watch/watched the Super bowl.
X You own track shoes or other sports related shoes.
X You collect your jerseys.

X You have a wall or shelf dedicated to your trophies / awards.
X You have posters or plaques of famous athletes.
X Your garage consists of sports equipment.
X You belong/belonged to a school team.
X You are going/did go to a sports summer camp.
X You have a specific number.

Total: 7

HARDCORE//SCENE

X You like loud music.
X You love/loved the Ninja Turtles.
X You never walk anywhere.
X You wear slip-on shoes.
X You wear/wore Vans.
X You like the band Panic! At the disco.
X You wear band t-shirts.
X People have called you a freak and meant it.
X You love to "hardcore" dance.
X Hair has been died more than 1 color

TOTAL:3

YOUR BOY SIDE

X You love hoodies.
X You love jeans.
X Dogs are better than cats.
X its hilarious when people get hurt.
X You've played with/against boys on a team.

X Shopping is torture.
X Sad movies suck.
X You own/Ed an X-Box.
X Played with Hot wheel cars as a kid.
X At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
X You own/Ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
X You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
X You watch sports on TV.
X Gory movies are cool.
X You go to your dad for advice.
X You own like a trillion baseball caps.
X You like going to high school football games.
X You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
X Baggy pants are cool to wear.
X It's kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
X Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favourite colors.

X You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
X Sports are fun.
X Talk with food in your mouth.
X Sleep with your socks on at night.

Total: 17

Your girl side:

X You wear lip gloss

X You love to shop.

X You wear eyeliner.
X You wear the color pink
X Go to your mom for advice.
X You consider cheerleading a sport.
X You hate wearing the color black.
X You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
X You like wearing jewellery.
X Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
X Shopping is one of your favourite hobbies.
X You don't like the movie Star Wars.
X You were in gymnastics/dance
x It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.

X You smile a lot more than you should.
X You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
X You care about what you look like.
X You like wearing dresses when you can.
X You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
X You love the movies.
X You used to play with dolls as little kid.
X Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.
X Like being the star of everything.

Total: 5

I’m going to go rethink my life now cause im a girl and i had more guy... so... um... yeah... bye...

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If your part of the 7 percent that would ask the person "what was your first clue?" copy this onto your profile then add your name to the list:Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A, Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A.,Evil Genus of the C.O.C.A., Invador Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, BellaBookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, Spottedlilly, Alleyanna Cullen, hugs.for.all.the.emo.boyz, I'll have some stupid Cliche, rainxface, maximumride24,FangsGirl24601, A Silenced Angel, UNDERLANDERfromtheOVERLAND, sunshine2006578,FangPlusMeEqualsNinja, Drizzle-Gleek

Favorite Quotes

"When life hands you lemons, make grape juice, sit back and let the rest of the world wonder how you did it."

"Every book has an ending...but in life every ending is a new beginning"

"The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with."

"People think it must be fun to be a smart, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world"

"There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or you suck.”

"Be a loser because 'cool' is overrated"

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."

"We may not make good decisions But hell, we make good stories."

"Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one. "

"I didn't lie! I just created fiction with my mouth! "

"Some people are like Slinkies: not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face, when you push them down a flight of stairs. "

"I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells."

"Imagination is more important than knowledge."

"The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits."

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

Heaven Doesnt want me and Hell think's i'll take over. Looks like your stuck with me.

You think you're all that and a bag of chips. Well I'm all that and a bag of skittles. So taste my rainbow, bitch.

Remember this, if someone is bothering you. It takes 40 muscles to frown, but it takes only three to stick up your middle finger and say, "Bite me!"

Yes, I hit like a girl. You could too if you hit just a little bit harder.

Every time you open your mouth, you get in trouble. Alternatively, just stick up your middle finger under the table.

I have reviews from teens and you don't. In your FACE James Patterson.

There's nothing wrong with taking to random objects, its when they start to talk back that you need to worry.

Who ever said that words never hurt obviously has never got hit by a dictionary.

RACISM

A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"When I was born I was black,"
"When I grew up I was black,"
"When I'm sick I'm black,"
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"
"When I'm cold I'm black,"
"When I die I'll be black."
"But you sir..."
"When you're born you're pink,"
"When you're sick, you're green,"
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"
"When you're cold you turn blue,"
"And when you die you turn purple."
"And you have the nerve to call me colored"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE TO HELP STOP RACISM

Nine of the ten Voices in my head think I'm sane. The tenth is undecided.

Growing older is manditory. Growing up is Optional.

When Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then.

You say I've lost my sanity. Well I have news for you. You can't lose what you never had

Yeah, Im a loser. but the coolest loser you'll ever meet

9 Things I Hate About Everyone:

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time...I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my ass when I ask where the toilet is?

2 People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". darn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Idiots!

5 When people say while watching a film "Did you see that?". No Loser, I paid 12.00 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8 When people say "life is short". What the heck?! Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

ACTUAL PRODUCT LABELS THAT SCARE ME

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Maximum Ride and House of Night, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, The Lonely Teenager, AliceDaSpaz, Skittle.Rocke, Silent_Broken_Heart, St. Fang of Boredom, Kara Nicole aka Karecitay, Drizzle-Gleek

92 percent of American teens would die if Fang told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would tell Fang to get over himself and then shove him back in your basement where he belongs. Then, you would resurrect the 92 percent of overzealous fangirls and use them as your zombie army to take over Canada and rename it Canadia where you would rule as Queen with Fang by your side as your extremely hot king who has no real political power except to stand there and make you look good.

95 percent of American teen girls would rush in a mob to every sperm bank if Robert Pattinson announced that he had donated sperm. Copy this to your profile if you would be part of the 5 percent holding a gun, watching the mob rush by, and picking off the weaklings...

-Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hot-line. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities press 3, 4, 5, 6. If you are paranoid, we know what you are and what you want so stay on the line and we'll trace your call. If you are delusional press 7 and your call will be sent to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer you. If you are dislexic press 6, 9, 6, 9, 6, 9. If you have a nervous disorder fidget with the hatch key until the beep. After the beep, please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again later and if you have low self esteem, hang up; all our operators are too busy to talk to you

Stupid things! In bold are the thing's I've done lol.

1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails
3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head
7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself
8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand
9. Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. Tried to pull open a door that said push
11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion
12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
13. Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs
14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave
15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair
16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble
17. Have had the juice from a grape squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it
18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard
19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name
20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot
21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on
22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle.
23. Have run into a closed door
24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else
25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it
26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer
28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan
29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock
31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside
33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot
36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on
37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard
39. Walked into a pole (if your driving don't laugh pedestrians running intopoles. may cause car crash.)
40. Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident
41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house
42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on
43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it
45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do.
46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it
47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. Have poked yourself in the eye
49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on
50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair
51. Have done enough stupid things to make a test
52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil
53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it
54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was.
55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were
56. Looked into an overhead light purposefully while it was on
57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day.
58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it
60. Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny or a movie
61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it
63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person
65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side
66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions
67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it
69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out
70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face
72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. Ran into a door jam
74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. Have purposely licked playground sand
77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band
78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't
79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people
80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out
82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
83. Sat and wondered why men’s dress shirts have a loop on the back.
84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about
85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair
86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone
87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird
88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people
89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria
90. Sucked on a cup and got a hickey from it.
91. As you were writing, you moved your head back and forth with your pen/pencil
92. Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them
93. Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper
94. Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours
95. Started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story
96. When you saw a ‘beware of dog’ sign, you told the owners to beware of the dogs not realizing they owned the dogs
97. You have spelled your own name wrong before
98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling.
99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class.
100. Have popped a balloon in your mouth.

Stop the Pairing Wars!

By copying and pasting this in your profile, you vow to respect other pairings and the people that like them.

You shalt insult them, explain why they can't be together, or say that they would rather be with someone else.

You shall have your opinions but shalt insult shall avoid them if you hate them.

You shall keep an open mind about stories even if you despise the pairing.

You shall paste this in your profile.

You Know You're Obsessed With Maximum Ride When...

1. You're friends think you're crazy for being obsessed with six flying kids and their talking dog.
2. You see someone in a white lab coat then run off screaming.
3. You've called one of your siblings/friends/family members Max, Fang, Iggy, Nudge, Gazzy, or Angel.
4. You refuse to talk to anyone who's named Ari.
5. You claim you have wings.
6. You drool when you hear the word 'Fang'.
7. You daydream about meeting the flock.
8. You've reread Maximum Ride about 3 times or more.
9. You look for the flock's theme songs and get excited when you find one that fits perfect.
10. You study about birds.
11. You hate science class/refuse to dissect any type of animal.
12. You have a crush on Iggy or Fang or both.
13. You read Fang's blog daily. Even though you know it's JP talking.
14. You're waiting for your 'Nick Ride'.
15. You are counting down the days for the next book.
16. You will go to the first opening for the movie, even if it's at midnight.
17. You look in the mirror cautiously to make sure your reflection is not an Eraser.
18. You hate dog crates.
19. You think scientists are evil.
20. You argue with people if Max is a girl's name or a guy's.
21. When your spending the night at a friend's, you say you'll take first watch.
22. You've found a new respect for blind people.
23. You think MR is the best series ever and you want to meet James Patterson, author.
24. You say 'U and A' a lot.
25. You think you have a Voice like Max.
26. You've gotten your Online Friends hooked on it.
27. You use sarcastic remarks from MR.
28. You know what 'Fax' is.
29. You were one of the characters from MR for Halloween.
30. You claim to have brain attacks.
31. You protect your thoughts. Angel might be reading them.
32. You give a crazy look to people who don't know what MR is.
33. You daydream of flying.
34. You love chocolate chip cookies.
35. You seriously felt like you were in the book.
36. If you want to become a writer because of MR
37. If they make a poster, shirt, key-chain, button, anything MR you will buy it.
38. If you love Fan-fiction.
39. In school, it's hard to concentrate because you're thinking of Maximum Ride.
40. You want a talking dog.

What to say if a man hits on you

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

(1) A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I'm gonna make you the happiest woman alive." the woman replies, "I'll miss you..."

(2)Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And patience for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.
AMEN

(3) Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for
breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

(4) Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor

My Mother...

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

more quotes

War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you

If all else fails, destroy all evidence that you tried.

I don't suffer from insanity - I enjoy every minute of it

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door

The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on

Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt

Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience

I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me

You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.

Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them

Sanity? I never had such a useless thing to begin with!

That which does not kill me had better run pretty dang fast.

Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."

When in doubt, push random buttons!

You wanna know why God created man before woman? Every masterpiece needs a rough draft!

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.

Last night I was looking up at the stars when suddenly I wondered..."Dude, where the heck's my ceiling?"

There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

They say guns don't kill people; people do. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled 'BANG!' I don't think you'd kill many people...

Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking

He who laughs last thinks slowest

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up

Having the love of your life say, "We can still be friends," is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

The dinosaurs extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.

Its not until you're broken that you know what you're made of.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

Everyone has a wild side--me and my friends just prefer to make them public.

Normal is just a setting on washing machines.

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck.

I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to

Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.

Always take the time to smell the roses...and sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.

I believe no problem is so large or so difficult that it can't be blamed on someone else.

No one ever says "it's only a game" if their team is winning.

I never repeat myself, so pay close attention to me the first time, cause I never repeat myself.

When all else fails, use duct tape.

I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

My Reality Check bounced.

On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?

Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there's footprints on the moon.

"There are 1000 ways I could kill you, and 941 of them hurt."
"So what do the other 59 of them do? Tickle?"

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Never memorize something that you can look up.

J.K. Rowling proved that some young adult novels can be over 500 pages. Stephanie Meyers proved that some shouldn't be.

A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.

You're born an original, don't die a copy

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet,
And so are you,
But the roses are wilting,
The violets are dead,
The sugar bowl's empty,
And so is your head.

There is a woman at the beginning of all great things

The best things in life are unseen- that's why we close our eyes when we kiss, cry, and dream

There are all kinds of art. There's the art of drawing, the art of dancing, the art of science, and of course the refined art of being an idiot

Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.

If ignorance is bliss, then w

In a hy aren't more people happy?

Sometimes I Wonder, "Why is that Frisbee getting bigger?" and then it hits me!world full of cheerios, be a fruit loop.

I am temporarily distracted by a shiny object.

Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.

I'm an angel honest... the horns are just there to keep the halo straight

I dream of a better tomorrow, where Chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

Best friends, it’s who we are . . . instead of saying "excuse me" we push each other out of the way and say "move".
We hug each other and laugh at any random moment.
We argue about the stupidest things then we find out we were both wrong.

It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn.

A friend is like a flower,
a rose to be exact,
Or maybe like a brand new gate
that never comes unlatched.
A friend is like an owl,
both beautiful and wise.
Or perhaps a friend is like a ghost,
whose spirit never dies.
A friend is like a heart that goes
strong until the end.
Where would we be in this world
if we didn't have a friend?

Is it weird that i have a crush on the turtle I hatched from my grape fruit?-FangPlusMeEqualsNinja-(she really said that during a sugar-rush)

Famous Last Words

Hey, watch this!

Poke it with a stick, see if it's dead.

What could possibly go wrong?

I'll hold it and you light the fuse.

I've got a great idea!

Where'd you put the bomb?

RUN!!

Hey, that looks like fun!

I wonder what this does...

Red or blue, red or blue...?

Oh, crap.

Why's it bubbling?

Guys, you gotta see this!

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As Part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped if favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 1 letter shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments wil enkourage the removal of double leters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be droped from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German lik zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad yu smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

Things Maximum Ride has Taught Us:

1. Being different is okay.

2. Even the little things can help save the world.

3. Red-heads are evil!!

4. Love always makes itself known. Even if it takes you five books and fourteen years of your life to see it, it's there.

5. 6-year-olds do have the ability to take over the world.

6. Duct tape is a handy tool if you have a mimicking 8-year-old.

7. The loss of a vet would be a tragedy.

8. Dressing in dark clothes and never talking does not make you emo; it makes you Fang-like.

9. French is the universal language.

10. Fang-sized is an acceptable form of measurement.

11. Count your blessings.

12. Teen magazines don't help you in life or death situations.

13. Nachos and Moutain Dew are proper mind controlling devices.

14. Fang has the power to sum up your life story in nine words.

15. Even a kick-ass, leader of a merry band of mutants like Max can make mistakes.

16. Never get hooked on Valium.

17. The best breed of dogs are talking Scotties!!

18. If one cannot be corrupted by power or money, there's always Snicker's bars.

19. It is okay to sell your soul for a chocolate-chip cookie.

20. Kids are better than adults.

21. You'll know the Apocalypse is coming when Max is wearing a dress.

22. The best cooks are blind pyros.

23. Submarines are tiny tin cans of doom.

24. Desert rat should always be cooked to well-done.

25. School really is an evil place.

26. Teachers really are out to get you.

27. Remember to flap.

28. Only one bird kid could pull off preppy Top-Siders.

29. GIRLS KICK BOYS' BUTTS!!

30. The order of power: God, Jesus, Chuck Norris, Max, Fang, Angel, Iggy, Gazzy, Nudge, Total, humans, animals. Brigid, Sam and Lissa don't make the list.

List Of Things To Do:

1. See if bookworms bounce.
2. Achieve this by throwing self down stairs.
3. Find something to become obsessed with.
4. Research the word 'Oxymoronic'.
5. Prove everyone else wrong.
6.Conduct experiments into the electrical conductivity of cheese.
7. Work out what the heck E=MC2 means.
8. Conquer the world. Before breakfast.
9. Put some Ragu on a sled, and push it down a hill.
10. Kidnap an imaginary book character.
11. Sharpen hockey stick.
12. Hit someone with aforementioned hockey stick.
13. Find somewhere to hide from police.
14. Run around screaming 'The angels have got the phone box!' Note how many odd looks, panicked expressions, laughs and weird bursts of blue light you get.
15. Buy chocolate spread. Have it on crumpets.
16. Become a master hypnotist.
17. Hypnotize a pineapple.
18. Lick my elbow.
19. Paint the entire house bright green.
20. Find something rhyming with 'silver'.
21. Find how many people think 'orange' sounds like 'gullible', when said slowly.
23. Avoid mind wipe.
24. Find Itex. Blow it up.
25. Actually, get some bombs. And an AK-47. Then blow Itex up.
26. Grow wings.
27. Get admitted to a mental institution, then initiate a mass break-out.
28. Spontaneously combust.
29. Find out where they store the Rubellium...
30. Kill whoever thought up homework. In worst way possible.
31. Work out where the pretty lights come from.
32. Find number 22.
33. Try not to think abut fluorescent penguins for a whole 5 minutes.
34. Duck punches currently being aimed at head.
35. Laugh manically.
36. Breathe underwater.
37. Grab a random passer by. Waltz with them.
38. Convince somebody that there are faeries living under the earth.
39. Eat pot of pesto. With no pasta.
40. Scream 'I like CHEESE!' whenever anyone asks you a question. Then proceed to hop in circles before collapsing on the ground.
41. Squirt ketchup all over furniture. Claim to have been attacked by vengeful nargles.
42. Look for missing socks. If in doubt, ask Iggy.
43. Do homework that was due in for last week.
44. Listen to song. Over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over, until imprinted on consciousness.
45. Teach everyone the dead pinata dance.
46. Play with fire.
47. Run away to join the circus.
48. Get another chainsaw. Last one broke half way through sawing someones head off...
49. Hit people over the head for no apparent reason, before running away. Cackle manically while doing so.
50. Repeat what people say. At the exact time they say it. Ooh, tricky. You need to be psychic for this.
51. If someone says they're worried, reply with, 'Don't worry. I've got a toothpick. Nothing can go wrong!'
52. Add 'of doom' on the end of everything, ex. 'Please pass me the carrots of doom' or 'That rabbit of doom doesn't look very well, does it?'
53. Mkae asbltoeuly no sesne.
54. Find an obscure town in an obscure country on Google Earth. Tell everyone it has the key to immortality somewhere near it.
55. Poke rocks. If asked why, say, 'For no good reason.'
56. Stare at the sky. When a sizable number of people have joined the staring, quietly walk away, and observe from a nearby, comfortable spot just how long the crowd stays there.
57. Become paranoid.
58. Ask a complete stranger if they'll marry you. Propose using a grapefruit.
59. Hit people over the head with books.
60. KETCHUP SANDWICHES!
61. Hoard all the shiny stuff in house. Pile it on chair. Say, over and over, 'My precious!' in creepy Golum accent.
62. Get a motto. Something odd.
63. Wonder if anyone is actually reading this.
64. Turn all the baked bean cans upside down in Tescos. If questioned, it was caused by a bump in the fabric of the time-space continuum...

20 Ways to Maintain Chaos

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. Tell them there is no number twenty.

I Hate Disclaimers! Copy and Paste if U do, 2!

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever stayed up for over 40 hours continuously just because you frickin' could, copy this into your profile.

If you think the Coco Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.

If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Fred should just let Barney have the freakin' Coco Pebbles and stop chasing him, then copy and paste this in your profile.

If yoo cant spel too sav yoor lyfe then putt thes in yoor profiele

98 of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels.

If you think the semi-colon is completely usless, stupid, annoying and plotting to destroy the English language as we know it, put this in your pro! (well not completely useless ;-)

If you don't watch Laguna Beach, O.C., or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever tripped over a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your pro

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever repeatedly ran into a glass/screen door copy this into your profile

If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile

If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile

If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love Max Ride and cannot live without it, post this in your profile.

If you have many bouts of dejavu a day, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've met your not-blood related twin (in resemblance or personality), copy and paste this in your profile. (dude, it was weird)

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane copy and paste this onto your profile.

Ninety-eight percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy this and paste it in your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

92 percent of American teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch/American Eagle told them it was uncool to breathe. If you are one of the 8 percent who would stand there and laugh, copy this into your profile.

If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which makes weird good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy & paste this onto your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile. (All the time.)

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile (See above)

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever told anyone that you can walk and read without running into anything, then promptly ran into a tree/ park bench / ice cream stand, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever (almost) taken over the world, but were distracted by something shiny, copy and paste this into your profile.(the nickel was soooo shiny)

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, which I am, but I'm also random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

You're over eleven and still watch Disney copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever read/started to read a chapter in a fan fiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Please read-true story (not me)

I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back.

The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.

The Cashier said, 'I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.'

Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: 'Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'

The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''

Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.

The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.

Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.

'It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas.

She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.'

I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.

But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.'

His eyes were so sad while saying this. 'My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'

My heart nearly stopped.

The little boy looked up at me and said: 'I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.'

Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me 'I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.'

'I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.'

Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.

I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. 'Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'

'OK' he said, 'I hope I do have enough.' I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money.

The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money!'

Then he looked at me and added, 'I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!'

'I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'

'My mommy loves white roses.'

A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.

I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started.

I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.

Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.

The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma.

Was this the family of the little boy?

Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away.

I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.

She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.

I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine.

And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

Now you have 2 choices:

1) Repost this message, or
2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart

If you would take a bullet for your best friend, put this in your profile.

SOMEONE MAKES FUN OF YOU. A GOOD FRIEND WOULD MAKE FUN OF THEM BACK. A TRUE FRIEND WOULD BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THEM FOR YOU. copy and paste in profile if you have any "true" friends.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, Owl of the Night, WhatWouldRonandHermioneDo, American-Heart-101, DylanandCole1fan. DarklightningWolf13. Drizzle-Gleek

A friend calls you while you're in jail, a good friend visits you while you're in jail and a best friend will be sitting next to you yelling, "THAT WAS AWESOME LET'S DO THAT AGAIN!" If you have a best friend copy and paste this into your profile.

Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! If you belive in GOD put this in your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree put this in your profile.

Did you know that... Kissing is healthy. Bananas are good for period pain. It's good to cry. Chicken soup actually makes you feel better. 94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers. Lying is actually unhealthy. You really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes. It's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you. 89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move. It's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed. Chocolate will make you feel better. Most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing. A good friend never judges. A good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any. Boys aren't worth your tears. We all love surprises. Now, make a wish. Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and your wish will be granted.

If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.

The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh?

Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you can read that please put it in your profile

Anger is merely depression without enthusiasm

Her name was Auroura
She was only five
This is what happened
When she was alive
Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic
Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair
She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound
Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endore
A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?
But she grabs her bear
And softly crys
She loves her parents
But they want her to die
She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"God, why? Why is
My life always sinking?"
Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did
Then one night
Her mom came home high
The poor child was hit and slapped
As hours went by
Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made
She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest,
"You deserve to die
You worthless pest!"
The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying
Police showed up
At the small little house
They quickly barged in
Everything was as quiet as a mouse
One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the sad little girl
Lying on the floor
It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms

If you hate child abuse put this in your profile.

Racism is wrong and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image. Five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message and my symbol for equality to your profile.

My name is Sarah

I am but three,

My eyes are swollen.

I cannot see,

I must be stupid,

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My parents so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren’t ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can’t do a wrong

I can’t speak at all

Or else I'm locked up

All the day long.

When I'm awake I'm all alone

The house is dark

My parents aren’t home

When my mommy does come home

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll just get

One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie’s bar.

I hear him curse

My name is called

I press myself

Against the far wall

I try to hide

From his evil eyes

I’m so afraid now

I’m starting to cry

He finds me weeping

Calls me ugly words,

He says its my fault

He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And run to the door

He’s already locked it

And I start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken,

"I’m sorry!", I scream

But its now much to late

His face has been twisted

with unimaginable hate

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

O please God, have mercy!

O please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door

While I lay there motionless

Sprawled on the floor

My name is Sarah

I am but three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me

If you are against child abuse put this poem on your profile!

Fang: 2 avian + 98 human = 100 hott!

If you are obsessively, uncontrolably, in love with Fang, post this in your profile

If you love Max Ride and cannot live without it, post this in your profile.

If Faxness is one of your obsessions, post this in your profile.

If you dream in maximum ride like every night post this in your profile

If you love the whole blind, pyro, mutant, baker thing about Iggy, post this in your profile.

If you would kill to have wings, post this in your profile.

Friends or best friends

FRIENDS: Never ask anything to eat or drink
BEST FRIENDS: Help themselves and is the reason you never have any food

FREINDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs. and grandma and grandpa
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents MOM and DAD GRAMPS AND GRANDMA

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin' DANG we really messed up'

FRIENDS: Never seen you cry
BEST FRIENDS: Won’t tell anyone else you cry... just laugh about it when you’re not down anymore

FRIENDS: Ask you to write down you number
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff and gives it back a few days later
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "my bad ... here’s a tissue"

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography about your life

FREINDS: Will leave you behind if that’s what everyone else is doing
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd's butts that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door
BEST FRIENDS: Would walk right in and say, “I’M HOME"

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell

FRIENDS: Are through high school /college (drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away when they think you've had enough
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, “Girl drink the rest of that you know we don't waste"

FRIENDS: Will give you a ride when they see you walking in the rain
BEST FRIENDS: Will steal your umbrella and drive away shouting "RUN YOU NEED THE EXERCISE!"

FREINDS: Will ignore this
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this crap