Some people tell me that I’m a great author. They say, “Wow, Marie! You’ve got talent!” And when they say that, I’m not sure what to say. Let me explain: it’s not because I don’t think I have talent, or I don’t know how to respond. Not at all. What it is… well, it’s not my talent. Let me stress that I’m not crazy here, okay? I guess I should just explain better: you see, it’s not completely my talent. Okay, now you think I’m crazy, don’t you? Yeah, I can tell just by the look on your face. I’m not crazy! Ugh, great, now that it’s finally out there, the way you made it sound, I’m a nutcase. Great.

Okay, so let’s get this straight: Not crazy. Just…. Different. My talent isn’t my talent, but it’s not because I don’t think anything of myself, not because I have information wired to me from Russia to be translated in India and fed to me through an earpiece and not because I pay someone to write for me. In fact… it’s…. well… Gosh, I feel foolish just saying it, but I might as well:

It’s because I have a writer inside me. A living, breathing soul; like, another person. Don’t give me that look, her name is Sarcasmastic. “Who?” Your hungry eyes ask me. Sarcasmastic—well, that’s her pen name, I don’t know her real name, because she doesn’t want me to know it—is the most committed writer I’ve met.

I just tell myself that she’s just a result of my MPD. She claims that she’s been there all along. Where? In my brain, of course! Anyways, she’s the writer inside my head. She’s a good one—she has the talent. With me as her messenger, she can be so famous! But that’s the problem; it’s going to be me that is famous. Man, you should see her when people compliment me; whew! Boy, does she get mad!

That’s why you’re reading this right now. She wanted everyone to know that she’s worked hard to get where she is; that she has the talent, the dedication and the pure strength of will to be a great writer… even if she IS stuck in my head. She says that she’s gonna make it, even if she has to do it from inside my head. Just remember that I’m not crazy.