Alian and Alyss Carter: Writers At Large!

(Insert theme song here)

Ages: Let it suffice to say that we are between the ages of 1 and 100.

Where We Live: A little planet called Earth on the corner of Milky Way Lane in Universepolis. Any questions?

Who We Are: human being n. 1. A member of the genus Homo and especially of the species H. sapiens. 2. A person: A fine human being.

SISTERS! (Unfortunately...ow! I was kidding!) Pardon my sister. She can be very sarcastic. In case you hadn't noticed, I (Alyss) am in italics and Alian is in normal print. Like so.

What We Write: Pretty much anything and everything, at any place and time, on any surface. Warning: Hide all pencils, pens, crayons, eyeliner, etc., when the Carter sisters are in the immediate vicinity. Oh, yeah! I once wrote on our driveway with a rock!

Alian: First off, let's say it together: Ali. An. Ali. An. No, not alien. Alian. Get it? Got it? Good. Now, I like to write poetry, short stories, and occasional attempts at full-length novels. I love to read and write, and I like to run (preferably away from Alyss...ow! She hit me!). I am the sane one. Unless I'm in a bookstore...then, not so sane. One more thing - we're friends with Myste in real life. Hi, Myste! IMPORTANT NOTE: I am available to be a beta for anyone who needs it. Just PM me and we can work it out.

Alyss: My name sounds exactly like Alice... except spelled different. I'm the funner one. AND DON'T YOU TELL ME THAT FUNNER ISN'T A WORD!! I have an ear for music so I'm the one that writes the songfic-ish stuff. I'm not that great at long stories but I do write a few. Two of my nicknames are 'The Phycho' and 'Happy Person'!... I forgot what I was going to say. I just blanked out. That happens a lot. Yeah. I also ramble...on...and on...

Upcoming Projects:

Carter Squared - Yep, we have our own show! (Insert applause here) We have a lot of insert thingies... And we're not afraid to use them. Anyway, Carter Squared does not appear on your local cable, so check us out here on FanFic. What we do is we interview book characters. We plan on interviewing the characters of Twilight, Harry Potter, Maximum Ride, and many more. If you have a book that you'd like us to interview, just let us know!

sChAuRfTfElRe - Just your basic iPod shuffle challenge, with a Carter or two thrown into the mix...

We have started a story. It's called Weird Beyond Words. Go check it out! It's a Maximum Ride/Twilight crossover.

We are also taking over Myste's stories (Animal Rights, Where's My Happy Ending, and Soul Mates.)It might take us a while to write them though. We have a lot going on.

QUOTES FROM US!!

I feel stupid... - Alyss

I like cheese and pickles, yeah! - Nikki (one of our friends)

EEEEEE!! - Liz (Another one of our friends)

Hey! - Mark (one of our friends)

I shalt get you!! - Alyss

STOP STARING AT ME!! - Alyss

I resent that. - Alian

I'm awesome and you know it. - Alian

My name is Morgan. I like - I luh - I like - real estate. - Nikki

And now we all... GO CRAZY!! - Nikki

You hang out with us too much. - Nikki, Liz, Alian, and Alyss to Mark

I'm going nowhere. At least this way, I'm going nowhere faster. - Alyss

Yes, you're related to me. - Alian

Uhhh... - Alian

Never mind. - Marianna (One of Alian's friends)

Ten-foot-tall-pink-chickens will haunt you for the rest of your life! - Roz (Another friend)

Santa's gonna eat you. - Roz

I have come to haunt your TEENAGE soooul! - Albert (just assume that the rest of these random people are our friends)

We're like care bears! I HATE care bears! - Amber

I am neon. BEAT THAT!! - Nikki

Those weird people just stared at us. Hi, weird people! - Nikki

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. - Unknown

I didn't lose my mind, I sold it on E-Bay! - Unknown

I'm nobody. Nobody's perfect, therefore I'm perfect! - Unknown

The problem with the rat race is that, even if you win, you're still a rat. - Lily Tomlin

I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandpa did, not screaming like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

A True Boyfriend:

When she walks away from you mad: Follow her.

When she stares at your mouth: Kiss her.

When she pushes you or hits you: Grab her and don't let go.

When she starts cussing at you: Kiss her and tell her you love her.

When she's quiet: Ask her what's wrong.

When she ignores you: Give her your attention.

When she pulls away: Pull her back.

When you see her at her worst: Tell her she's beautiful.

When you see her start crying: Just hold her and don't say a word.

When you see her walking: Sneak up and hug her waist from behind.

When she's scared: Protect her.

When she lays her head on your shoulder: Tilt her head up and kiss her.

When she steals your favorite hat: Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night.

When she teases you: Tease her back and make her laugh.

When she doesn't answer for a long time: Reassure her that everything is okay.

When she looks at you with doubt: Back yourself up.

When she says that she likes you: She really does more than you could understand.

When she grabs at your hands: Hold hers and play with her fingers.

When she bumps into you: Bump into her back and make her laugh.

When she tells you a secret: Keep it safe and untold.

When she looks at you in your eyes: Don't look away until she does.

When she misses you: She's hurting inside.

When you break her heart: The pain never really goes away.

When she says it's over: She still wants you to be hers.

Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.

When she's mad, hug her tight and don't let go.

When she says she's ok, don't believe it, talk with her - because 10 yrs later she'll remember you.

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her.

Call her before you sleep and after you wake up.

Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

Tease her and let her tease you back.

Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it's stupid.

Give her the world.

Let her wear your clothes.

When she's bored or sad, hang out with her.

Let her know she's important.

Kiss her in the pouring rain.

When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Whose ass am I kicking, babe?"

When she reposts this bulletin, she wants you to read it.

War doesn't determine who's right. It determines who's left.

"We adore men as individuals, but we agree that as a group, they're rather stupid." -Mary Poppins

Growing up doesn't make you any less of an idiot. It just means that you're idiotic in different ways. -Alian Carter

Guys will be guys, and girls will be mature. -Alyss Carter

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. -T-shirt

My mind works like lightning - one brilliant flash and it's gone.

Friends - the people who call you an insanely insensitive melodramatic freak. -Alian

PRO-LIFE QUOTES

"I've noticed that everyone who is for abortion is already born." -Ronald Regan

It would be appreciated if you could turn your manners on. -Our history teacher

"Only the brave know how to forgive." -Laurence Stern

We were given two hands to hold

Two legs to walk

Two eyes to see

But why only one heart?

Because the other one

Was given to someone for us to find.

"I will always be there for her, but who's going to be there for me?" -Carlise Michelle Richards

"Charity sees the need, not the cause."

"Make cupcakes, not war!" -KTKA (One of Alian's friends)

Birds of a feather flock together - because the other birds knocked them out of the nest.

The best time to make friends is before you need them.

A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even when he knows you are slightly cracked.

"I have no trouble with my enemies. I can take care of them all right. But those darn friends - they're the ones that keep me pacing the floor nights!

I have lost friends - some by death; others through sheer inability to cross the street.

Never look down on somebody unless you're helping him up! -Maggie (Another of Alian's friends)

"Why so serious?" -Joker

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

I laugh at a joke three times:

1. When it's told.

2. When it's explained.

3. Five minutes later when I get it.

"Ha ha ha! Wait...what?" -Maggie

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry!" -KTKA

"I'm not random...I just have many thoughts." -Maggie

Have you ever tried to pop popcorn with the "This Side Up" side down?

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone.

Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, so weird is good.

I once thought that I'd made a mistake, but I was mistaken.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE that's weird.

If two goose are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, then why aren't two footballs feetball?

Have you ever pushed on a door that said pull and pulled on a door that said push?

Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

Never take life too seriously. No one gets out alive anyway...

No one is perfect...Well, there was this one guy, but we killed him.

Carter Vocabulary (These words are real!)

hemidemisemiquaver: a 1/64th musical timing

quean: a disreputable person

lob: a bumpkin or an oaf

crudivore: an eater of raw meat

crapulence: discomfort from eating or drinking too much

abibliophobia: fear of running out of reading material (Alian has this! She thinks...)

pantophobia: fear of everything

hippopotomonstrosesuippedaliophobia: fear of long words

Everybody makes mistakes. The trick is to make them when no one's looking.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought, "Where the heck is my ceiling?!"

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Person 1: Happiness is just around the corner!

Person 2: Too bad the world is round...

If dance were any easier, it would be called football.

The newscaster is the person who tells you "Good evening," and then tells you why it's not.

Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic...

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

When you get caught looking at him, just remember that he was looking back.

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

I'm leaving now to find myself. If I should return before I get back, please ask me to wait.

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Existing is mandatory. Living is optional. -Alian

If you get corn oil by squeezing corn, then how do you get baby oil?

I intend to live forever or die trying.

If the #2 pencil is so popular, then why is it still #2?

BLABS ABOUT SHAKESPEARE

ROMEO AND JULIET:

1. In Romeo and Juliet, Romeo and Juliet kiss three times before they even know each other's names. That's the power of love for ya!

2. When Romeo's friends find out about Juliet, they tease Romeo mercilessly about it. So Romeo does what any respectable man would do...he

runs away!

3. While running away, Romeo runs into a wall. He decides to jump over it. And...

4. He lands in an orchard that just happens to belong to Juliet's family.

5. It also happens that at that exact moment, Juliet is pronouncing her love for Romeo to all the attentive trees in the orchard.

6. This also proves that Romeo is Bipolar. One minute he's sulking in the orchard muttering about how his friends know nothing about love. Then,

he hears Juliet's voice and instantly brightens up a thousand watts. I don't know many people who can do that.

7. Here's another fun fact. When Romeo goes to tell the Friar he wants to marry Juliet, the Friar exclaims (and these are his exact words) "Holy

Saint Francis!"

8. Here is a personal opinion; I think that everyone in this story needs to seek professional help. Romeo and Juliet are suicidal, and

the feud between their families could really use a professional lawyer.