My stuff basically covers games and comics, at least as of right now. The stories here are pretty much hit or miss.

UPDATE AS OF 1/25/19: I'm back again, as I have been intermittently over the last few years. I hope some folks out there have been enjoying my semi-regular entries and such on here. I will do all I can over the coming days and weeks (and weeks) to update entries in terms of brief commentary on past stories over the last few years.

UPDATE AS OF 12/19/15: I am once again writing in some new summaries here and such; I realize that I have not done this for a while. I am not doing all of these in one evening, so please be patient with me. I will also be moving some summaries down to the "Deleted" section, AND I will soon have a section on "Train Wrecks I Never Wrote" regarding certain stories I never quite got around to writing, and never will for their length and/or their awfulness--but I just wanted to share the ideas behind them in any case here.

UPDATE AS OF 12/31/15: I really appreciate everyone reading my stories over time; this said, I am sad to say that, beyond writing one more story next year, likely around May of 2016 or so, I will be quitting writing fan fiction. All my stuff will still be up here and all...I just want to move on and try some other things, like a shot at publishing an original novel (yeah it's funny). I know that alliteration and puns and all that do not make for good writing; Quillon42 was just a character really, a persona that I took on in writing. In any case, I appreciate all the reads over time; please PM if you'd like to talk sometime about any of the games, films etc on which I've written...I'd love to discuss them. Thank you again, Happy New Year, and hoping all are well now.

I think from looking at the views on my stories (or lack thereof), a good number of people are not too crazy about my writing. I don't care. I'm really writing for myself primarily; if you read and like it, then great, and thank you. If not, then whatever; you do what you want. While more views on my stuff would be nice, I'm not compromising my voice on here for the sake of them.

I can give a general guide for these as follows:

A Pungent Purlieu For Boa Bassinets: They don't have Bird Box as a choice for source material in the Publishing New Story section here, so I had to go with "Misc Movies" for that one (they do have A Quiet Place). Really this story needs no introduction, as we have an apocalypse in itself of post-apocalyptic "Don't do this or you'll die" stories. This story flows logically from all of them (like gas out of an ass) so there you go and all. Some people on forums and online user reviews have already suggested the dynamic for my story here; I'm the only one with time on his hands sort of to actually write it out.

A Sanctum Safe from the Limelight: The Release of the Beast: Everyone loves that X-Men: The Animated Series episode so much, the one with Beast and Carly and all that ("Beauty and the Beast"). Well, before that episode...before that awful (IMO) series entirely...there was a four-issue limited series in the 1980s between Beast and Dazzler, also called "Beauty and the Beast." I always thought it sucked in general that Dazzler and Longshot were basically replaced by Jubilee and Gambit, respectively, as the lightshow and the coolblow, and this story scratches the itch Alison Blaire probably felt at being so replaced. I also did Wolverine in this story, because why the hell not, for all the appearances the jerkoff has.

Ahead Off Target To The Fatwa: Jennifer And Iola Eradicating Radicals: As with a number of other people (and as can be seen through other stories on this very site), I felt bad for Iola's fate the Dead on Target. As such, I wanted an alternate reality wherein she would be okay and such...and I wanted the story to be kind of fun on the side...so here is what you have. As explained elsewhere in this profile too, I had a number of popular movies, books, etc I wanted to do stories on, but only so much time, so I decided to combine some source materials, so here is Hardy meets Future and such.

Airduct Anecdotes Anthology: Covers Dead Rising 1. The first collection of something...actually, the first anything I had on here. Depends on the story as to whether it's Hit or Miss. I believe the first six stories are Hits; from there it's up to you maybe.

Alloy So Alluring: The Meshing Of Messhu And Lemnear: This was one of the first animes I had ever watched as a teenager, way back in the day. It was a simplistic story and such, but given that it was one of the first in this format that I had seen, I wanted to dedicate a small story to it. I know that the tale is a bit heavy on narration, but I still feel that the sincere intimacy between the Bronze and Silver warriors here makes the read worth it.

Amends in the Abyss: My Number One OTP now and forever (contrary to what might be written in the Foreword or Afterword of some stories here) is Scott Summers and Madelyne Pryor. It's old-school, but I've been an X-Fan since the very late 1980s and since before the 1990s Mainstream and all, so it goes back. I'm 300% sure Scotty and Maddy will, as a pop prophetess (semi-sarcasm) once said, "Never, ever, ever get back together," but eff it; I love them. Incidentally, according to my traffic stats, almost nobody gets past the first chapter, either because they cannot stand my admittedly strangled writing style, and/or they cannot stand the way I treat Teen Jean in the first chapter as, unlike the Adult Jean whom I adore, I despise the Bendis "Teen" version (see also "Hope Summers"). I think this whole story's a Hit, but it depends on where your fan sympathies lie I suppose.

Armistice Quite Amorous: Licentiousness For Lancia: I'm not the hugest fan of Contra ever but there's just something so alluring about Lucia (which should be pronounced as "Lu Chee A" and not "Loosha" but whatever). I always felt bad for Lance as well as he was always the Salieri to Bill's Mozart, the Elisha Gray to Bill's Bell (Alexander Graham, that is, yo) or something. So I just peanut butter and jellied the two fuckers here for my own pleasure and such (I mean Lance and Lucia...not Bill and anyone yo).

Base Conjury and Bathetic Climaxes: This takes place during Necrosha, but it actually kind of makes fun of Endsong more than anything, insofar as the whole "Let's resolve everything with a schmaltzy sending of our love into the problem (Re: The fact that everyone at the end of Endsong (SPOILER WARNING), including friggin' *Emma Frost* sends his or her love into Jean Grey to exorcise the Phoenix or exorcise the spirit/force/whatever). ...Actually, now that I think about it, *I* kind of do schmaltzy stuff all the time in my stories...don't I?:) (Meaning, Pollyanna endings, as in Emmatration or my Revisions story with Psylocke/Revanche...ah well). By the way, the whole "What the F" moment, literally, with Selene here and the lights going out is a reference to the same exclamation uttered by Selena Gomez at a concert just recently in December 2013; you can put in "Selena Gomez Concert F-Bomb" into Google and get a good nine-second clip of it, with the teeny boppers going "EEEEE" and everything just beforehand.

Blaster and Mistress: Tanked and Trysting: Does basically to NES's Blaster Master (both the game and the Worlds of Power novel) what I did to PS2's Urban Reign. Yes, it's a bit dodgy, but I'm just having some fun with the subject matter; sue me:)

Blight Squall: Asskicker in the Post-Applesauce: The first part of this title comes from the seagoing saga White Squall, which no one should remember. I think whether this story "works" depends on how you're reading it. If you read it emotionally and are like "Yeah! GO ON JUDITH! YOU GO YELL AT THEM WALKERS!!!" then you'll like it; if you read it rationally, on the other hand, you'll probably call BS on the concept of yelling at Walkers to make them go away. I don't know. I just watched Carl leaving Judy for a second at the end of Them, just before they propped up the barn door against the zoms, and I wondered "What if they failed?" and then this was the result.

Bombing Mall: A Chopping Mall PseduoSequel: Watch Chopping Mall. No, seriously. It was once entitled Killbots, but that didn't sell as well, so The Powers That Be Behind Crappy Ass Eighties Horror Films changed it to Chopping Mall and it supposedly did better in the box office--apparently the film had two goes in the theatres or whatever. It's funny too how there's really no "chopping" in the film, but rather just robots lasering everyone. There is a mall, though.

Bubblegum Carbons: The Reanimating Machinations Of Mackie: When I was a teen, I so hated seeing what happened to that one soldier in Bubblegum Crisis Episode 3; I found it to be tasteless glamorized violence (see also "Polarized Patricide" below), although sensitivity to such violence is subjective and I believe I've done some violence myself in some stories as well...regardless, here yet again is a story designed to heal the disturbance brought on by seeing that violence from BC3...and Linna gets a guy in the process as well!

Cerated Edge: A Waxen Salve to Cure the Curse: The PC game Waxworks is really, REALLY messed up in terms of the graphic violence depicted (which is 95% all about the death animations of the hero). Something else really messed up about the game (SPOILERS FOR THE GAME HERE) is how graphically and horribly the Witch antagonist dies, as awful as her curse was. Here once more I come up with a peaceful alternative; the solution proposed here is somewhat incidentally feminist...but the first ending listed here, at least, comes off as incidentally objectifying for women in contrast. I'm not taking either side here (Feminist or Chauvinist); I write what I feel like.

Chasms and Chiasmus: Officially this seems to be a Hit, as a lot of people are reading this one; I feel personally that it's okay, but in retrospect it's a bit too standard-fan-fictiony for my tastes (i.e. pairing up two characters who do not get together in canon; going on and on about how one longs for the other, whether it's reciprocated from the other side or not). I'm cool with this story, and I always have wanted to see Warren with Jean...I don't know. It's not one of my absolute personal favorites, but I'm still cool with it and it's pretty good.

Coitalmania: The Consummation of Simon and Carmilla: I enjoy Castlevania much like anyone else, although most of my experiences with the franchise only involve the old-school games of NES and Game Boy of yore. I don't have any incredible obsession either with Carmilla or with Simon; I just find the characters to be cool and/or alluring, and I had some funny ideas using places and objects from the games and such, so here this is. I could imagine that if this story were done in real life, Carmilla would probably be played by the exhibitionist Michelle L'Amour, while the redheaded Simon here would be played by, umm...Copp...er...cab? Yeah, that's it; that's the ticket. It's Michelle L'Amour effing Coppercab. There; I just went and ruined the fantasy for you. You know, though, I also envision this story featuring the blond Simon from the cover of Castlevania 2, instead of the ginger from Judgment...and Carmilla here, instead of being the Wii one (though she is certainly not "wii" in her proportions there)...feel free to substitute the Carmilla from Lords of Shadow who holds that Marie girl hostage (and who (SPOILERS)...deep throats the iron stake in the end there...(END SPOILERS)...and I'm not cool with that kind of violence against anyone...just sayin' as a point of reference, and also to distinguish that recent iteration of Carmilla from the other, hooded-habited "nun slut" Lords of Shadow one who I think should NOT be imagined in my story, as that Carmilla is weird and sucks IMO (like some iterations of Simon and other Belmonts as well, to be fair now)).

Conjurations Of Condemnation: Banishment Of Bayonetta: There are two things I am railing against in this story: One, as always, I despise generally the way in which some stories (in whatever medium) depict double standards in intergender violence, such that female characters can get away with slaughtering/humiliating/slaughtering male characters in any old way; the story I wrote here is a response to that, in which the haughty Bayonetta ends up getting a taste of her own miserable medicine for once. To me, it's bad enough that a character has to lose/die; don't humiliate them as well. For Bayonetta's douchily doing that IMO, I feel she had this story coming.

Counterfeit Caftans And Mixed-Up Miscreants: The Nixing Of Nicholas: As we all know now, Nicholas is a cad and it is uncertain as to whether his personality or mustache is the greater evil. In any case, this story was written up quickly to heal the hurt from the loss of Noah, who actually I thought was kind of douchy anyway (I mean, he did (SPOILERS) kind of inadvertently indirectly get Beth and Tyreese killed and all, but whatever (END SPOILERS)).

Dead Rising Or Alive: Again, if you would love the idea of a Reese's involving Dead Rising 1 and Dead or Alive 4, then have at this; also, if you're not a fan of Miranda Cosgrove, you might enjoy the last installment of it. So it's a Conditional Hit like the Scarface story above.

Dervish Most Devilish: The Demonization of the Goblin Queen: I wrote this one for a number of reasons here. For one, I often write stories in which characters who did not receive a certain comeuppance do receive it at last, and in The End, Maddy never did get payback for just slaughtering Dust as she did. For another thing, Maddy also never really had payback for all the egregious things she did during the first Inferno (even if she was thrown under the bus during the 1980s...she still went too far IMO). For yet another thing, well...I'm not saying I went through my teens and all, after reading Inferno, like expecting a gorgeous amazing redhead to come into my life, and none ever did come...but nonetheless this story is sort of a passive aggressive strike against Marvel for screwing up my libido and stuff in adolescence, kind of an Eff You to the Bullpen, and Claremont even and especially, for having such an adult costume sort of situation with the Goblin Queen...even if I did get off on it and all. It's complicated and all here.

Dreamings to Diadems: The Redeeming Reveries of Madelyne Pryor: Really everything or anything I need to say about this story I've already said in my Afterword to it...I love Madelyne, but moreso the old-school Madelyne who was nice and a good person generally--not the "Evil Jean" that she's been for the past few decades (kind of like how there's "Evil Ryu" now in Street Fighter, or that evil version of Cammy now, the one with the name starting with "D"...like "Detentionface" or something whatever). You know, if you follow The Walking Dead TV show...I just watched the Fourth Season episode called "The Grove," and it's like Bronze Age Good Madelyne's like innocent Mika, and Modern Age Evil Madelyne's like "messed up" Lizzie...nevermind. By the way, I might be writing a few Walking Dead stories soon (based mostly on the comics and not the show although I might have a couple of show characters in the comic universe...we'll see).

Dust Planet Duplicity: I think no one even knows this story exists. It's because I had to file it under "Miscellaneous"; it's specifically a short story based on Forgotten Worlds, which is one of my favorite arcade games of all time (I'm awful at it, though). So again, if you're into that game, and humor, you may like this entry.

Emmatration to Expiation: I would say this is a Hit; I think mainly it's because it's Emma Frost who's the main character, and how could you go wrong with that, officially? I like it, though it's not my favorite here.

Enchanting Uncoupling: The Bifurcation(s) Of Bimorphia: The refrain repeats here as with many other stories on here that I did this story because I was disturbed at seeing violence on the screen, here regarding the experiments leading to Bimorphia and such. This story heals that and all; I understand there is a good deal of gratuitous intimate action here...all I can say is that the game itself is kind of gratuitous, what with thong codes for all the female characters and all (though my indulging in it here does not make a second wrong a right of course).

Ententes Apocryphal: The Near Junta of Judith and Holophernes: As with the Bayonetta story above and others here, I am not a fan of glamorized, glorified, graphic violence by women against men, even if the girls are (invariably) the "good" characters and the men are (inevitably) the "bad" ones. If you flipped the genders on the characters here, and played it out as it is in the Bible, that kind of violence against Judith would be abominable--yet it's okay if it's her doing it to him. It just makes me angry; this story provides a more peaceful alternative.

Fatal Photo Finishes: A Life Term Of Death Penalties: I posted this one earlier in the year (around April 2015) and it received a bit of a negative response from a couple of people; the thing is, I have a number of other stories on here (such as Feed N' Slake or Lullabies to Pulverize, below) which are just as violent...yet somehow because those stories involve comeuppance to fictional characters, those stories are favorited, while this story here involves comeuppance to a real life infamous asshole and is thus deplorable. I personally don't understand it, really. I KNOW that the bigger thing to do in life is to forgive, and the victims of the Boston Marathon Bombing who could do that are better folks than me. I just see this story as a way to vent or have an outlet for the rage that goes with the damage from such an event--just like people might have been enraged at seeing the end of Eden Lake or the end of Walking Dead Volume 14: No Way Out, which respectively inspired Feed N' Slake and Lullabies to Pulverize. That's all I can say.

Feed N' Slake: I realize that this story is totally effing nuts. I almost NEVER write violence like this, and I have a SERIOUS issue with intergender violence, whether going from men to women or especially vice versa (as I IMO feel that many depictions of violence by women against men in fiction go way, way too far). It's just that the end of the film Eden Lake made me so angry that I wanted to write this as a reactionary thing. I have no obsession with Kelly Reilly, by the way (re: the story's alternate title); I'm too busy being obsessed with Jean Grey/Madelyne Pryor/Kwannon/Kwannon's navel (see "Penultimate Polka" below)/Elisabeth Braddock to divide my heart any more ways:)

Fixes from the Pyxis: The Besting of the Badasses: I just can't take The Walking Dead now anymore, with how full of itself it has become. Especially with some characters who have become so "badass," some of the players in it have become so unbearable, and I felt that they had to put in their place a bit. Thus this story, for me and for anyone else who has had it at least a bit with some of these Georgian goofballs.

Fly Flummoxed By The Flux: Anton Avenged And Stoltz Stultified: As with a trillion other stories on here now, the primary purpose is to help me deal with how disturbed I felt at some of the violence in the film Fly II. Eric Stoltz's character Martin was a smug little dipshit more or less in the film, despite how much that company kept him in a box and all, so I felt no remorse whatsoever having him get what he got in this story. I recommend you read a short series in comic book form (available on the website Comixology) called The Fly: Outbreak, which just came out this year in 2015; there too he gets served pretty nicely.

Fool Grease for the Foundation: The Lambricks' Just Desserts: I hated the way in which Shepard Lambrick (and yes, I know the actor who plays him is a sort of legend, from Re-Animator and all that), anyway, how Shepard is just this cold sociopath and crap, who doesn't care about anyone's fate...I know that's the entire point of him, but eff him. Hence this story.

Frills Have the Monster Eyes: A Couple of Carters Go Birdzerk: First of all, as contrived as this might be, I had a number of movies/games/etc I wanted to cover in stories, but only so much time to write the stories; as such, and as is the case here, I decided to combine some of the subject matter I wanted to cover. Hence this mashup up the Hills films (the new ones) and the Monster Eye game that's in the arcades now. A trillionth video game crush of mine in this is Betty from Monster Eye, so I had her in it along with her boner beau Jack and a number of characters from the Hills films. (And although I do not have a thing for Lindsay Lohan, I did have a thing for Jessica Stroup looking like Lidsay Lohan in Hills 2). My family has tropical birds also, so I hated, HATED the part where the parakeets "get it" in Hills 1...hence their violence in this story. I could give a crap about the dogs and stuff, though; sorry and not sorry here.

Garish Gewgaws and Gamma Guardians: The Recovery of Calliope: As I state below as well with my Chuck Norris story, one thing I hate in narrative is the loss of humanity; I hated it as much in this issue of Grimm Fairy Tales (I think it was Issue 10) by Zenoscope as I did in Carter's "The Company of Wolves" story. I also felt bad for the Abomination from Marvel a bit, so I decided to put the two of them together here to work out their issues and work things out between themselves most sweetly. As you can see toward the very end, Bruce gets a break as well, as some douchier characters in his series get their own comeuppance.

Grinding to Ground Zero: The Alphan Interventions of Deadpool: I adore Aurora (the Marvel one, not the Disney...oh, wait, Disney owns Marvel, so...well, nevermind:))...anyway, I wanted to do a story with Aurora, but make it all fun and stuff...and I always hated the horrible inopportune death of Mac (Guardian) from Alpha Flight...so I resolved a couple of things here with all this by way of this story.

Hearth Of Healing: The Mutilator Mother's Most Curative Confections: There was a pretty good (in a craptacular way) film back around 1985 called The Mutilator, in which a man goes insane after his son accidentally kills his mother/the man's wife with a rifle in the house. Here I felt bad for the son and the wife, and out of that emotion, as well as a bit of disgust at some of the graphic murders in the film, I wrote this one.

Ice Bucket Butchery (by the Punisher's Progeny): If you put "Ohio Ice Bucket Challenge Autism" or something like that into Google, you get the result of this atrocious incident in early September of 2014 or so in which a few crappy teenagers subjected an autistic peer to an "Ice Bucket Challenge" consisting of nothing in said bucket save for urine, feces, spit, and the remains of used cigarettes. There was much public outcry over this, from fellow residents of Bay Village, OH in which the incident occurred, to outrage by celebrities such as Drew Carey (who's from Cleveland); the report of it just made me angry and, like some of my other stories (such as the X-Stories "Polarized Patricide" and "Yachtsy Wrecks" below), inspired me to write something to avenge the wrong. And who better to visit wrongs dealt by nonsuperhumans...than the Punisher, or here, at least kin of the Punisher. (The reason for doing this by way of sons of characters like Punisher, Kingpin etc is because the players in the real Ohio ice bucket incident were teens...and I didn't want Frank Castle killing such youngens. For some reason, though, I don't have a problem with other whippersnappers slaughtering said youngens).

Job Offers Ethereal and Jetpacks Errant: Just another story in which I try to soften the blows against Scott Summers occurring year after year, courtesy of the Marvel Machine; I also try here, as with many of my other stories, to get Scott and Jean back together in the end (here, it's an end that happens many, many years later, but still). Here I'm balancing things out also through taking Hope down a peg, as she deserves IMO and which no Machine writer in the canonical composing of any of this has the balls to do.

Kinetic Drifts and Phonetic Shifts: The Unkoopaling of Madame Viper: Another of my favorite femmes of Marvel is Silver Sable; she's like Black Widow, but with dignity and stuff IMO. Just wanted to do a story with her and all; I liked her little chemistry with Sandman in her early Nineties series, and also I decided opportunistically to take a small dig at Anita Sarkeesian in a sense here as well. It's all in good fun.

Land Grafts and Fraction Reductions: I know that I've written stories already celebrating the idea of Scott and Madelyne staying or getting back together (see Amends above or Borealis below), and I've written stories about justice for both the bodies and minds of Betsy and Kwannon (see Revanches and Queue below). However, I wanted to drive the point for both these X-Narrative-Passions of mine one more time here, in light of the way that Fraction awfully handled these characters (at least Madelyne generally and European Psylocke) in his story arc from around 2009 with the Sisterhood and all. Also, as I believe I say in the course of Chapter Two of this story: I'm aware that the evil spirit whom Betsy fights on the astral plane, in her head (right after Fraction miserably makes Betsy skewer herself in the skull with her own psychic knife)--this spirit is most likely not Kwannon; however, I made it Kwannon to fit the narrative more readily as well as my points regarding the injustices of jettisoning Psylocke's original European body, as well as Kwannon's mind, from the narrative (see especially the "peanut butter cup" line in Chapter One of this story for a succinct take on this).

Lullabies To Pulverize: Justice For Jessie: Though I'm not a huge fan of graphic violence by women against men (or of course vice versa either), I wrote this because I was kind of horrified at the way the end of TWD Volume 14: No Way Out went down, and so this was my response. I was even MORE horrified, for the record, at the way they handled this moment in the effing TV show; see my postscript also.

Lurid Lampreys And Chomped-Upon Charlatans: Spawns Slaying Sandler: As with The Mutilator story above, this is based on an obscure 1980s horror film, specifically here The Deadly Spawn, in which strange leechlike creatures from outer space come to terrorize a small neighborhood (not to be confused with Night of the Creeps, which is basically the same thing). I felt bad for one female character who gets it in this film; also I felt nauseous after seeing Pixels this past summer, so I did a bit of a switcheroo on who gets the chomp here. As of right now (the end of December 2015) I think still no one has read this story (or the Mutilator one), but IMO they are each fun to check out anyway and all.

Maintenance Mergences Miscellaneous: Can you tell that I like alliteration by now? (Way, way, waaaaaayyy too much. I know. I'm sincerely sorry...ahh, not again!) Like the Airducts, these are Hit or Miss depending on the story. Cageyness might be the best story I've ever written, or at least the funniest and/or best paced/cadenced story. C(h)rystal is okay drama, though the story's a bit convoluted by my own admission. The first three stories in this grouping are supposed to be funny, while the rest are almost entirely serious, just so you know and all.

Medleys Of Melee: A Rock Opera For Routing Marauders: This was written in reaction to how bad I felt at the Morlock Tommy and her fate at the start of the Mutant Massacre. I was kind of screwed up badly as well by the Tommy film from the 1970s (made by The Who and all), and I decided to have fun by mashing together the two traumas here and such as it is now.

Miasma Most Ameliorative: Effluvial Elation and the Spirit of Spandex: This was the last X-Men story I ever wrote, and as such I wanted it to be something a bit broader, involving many characters, while also being a bit fun. I know it's strange and stuff, but I like being offbeat sometimes. Also, I have no regrets in making fun of Storm, as 1) her character is WAY too elevated/beyond reproach, unlike other characters like mainly Cyclops who get crapped on ALL the effing time, and 2) I'm really also honestly making fun of Claremont and especially Lobdell, as they would always perpetrate these cheesy scenes where one "cool" character would begin to lead another, spastic character in some kind of waltz or something, and the latter would freak out a second and then calm down in that magical moment and all...from my recollection it was done so many times it basically became meaningless after a while. So this story.

Nuke-Nudes Forever: The Penultimate Polka: I feel that this is a Hit, but again it depends on whether you've read or watched the source material. Specifically, I'm ragging on X-Men Forever generally, especially the Annual ("The Last Waltz"), as well as The Wolverine film from 2013. This is also a great story if you enjoyed the "Asian Psylocke flirting with Cyclops in the early Nineties" subplot, if you were around for that or otherwise read about it anyway in later years. I feel from reading X-Stuff that Betsy's psyche had more inhibitions than Kwannon's (I think they go into that particularly in X-Men Volume 2, #38, which was right before the Age of Apocalypse in the Mid-Nineties)--without Betsy's mind in the way here at all, it's just Kwannon going all-out after Scott, and the latter totally going all-out to give in to the former.

Occult Orisons and Print Prisons: I have been a fan of Malibu Comics since the mid-1990s or so; Mantra was probably my favorite of the titles (most of the titles were derivative of Marvel and DC franchises anyway). I felt bad as to what happened between Lukasz and Eden in that story, so this story, as with many of the other ones I have, functions to give a happier ending to the two. If you have not read Mantra, I would recommend it, if only up to about Issue #19 or so out of 24 (after the nineteenth issue, things kind of peter out honestly).

Ossuary Oscillations: Discarding The Darkness: Just combined here two of the things I enjoy/do most in my stories usually, between feeling bad for a character who was on the receiving end of bad physical trauma (ie Darkman) and healing the situation through an intimate encounter with a voluptuous seductress (the Widow/Assistant/Student from Cemetery Man or Dellamorte Dellamore). Here, by the way, I see Darkman more as the Arnold Vosloo one rather than the Liam Neeson one, for whatever reason. And God, but was Anna Falchi effing incredible in Cemetery/Dellamorte; I sure as eff wasn't about to have Douchepert Everett from the same film play opposite Peyton Westlake here now.

Phantasmonogamy: A Solution Of Salacity: This PC game, which was a sequel to the original Phantasmagoria (for which I also had a story, called Brumal Memoirs to Brutal Abbatoirs...and which was deleted not too long ago)...this sequel was very, very strange, but likeable in its strangeness as well (the subtitle of the sequel was "A Puzzle of Flesh," hence the subtitle to my story here). Here I come up yet again with a peaceful solution which resolves a lot of the angsting and needless deaths which occurred in Puzzle of Flesh, and everyone arguably ends up happy (except for Bob, but eff him).

Piston of the East West Slap: I admit and recognize that this story is pretty tasteless...I was first of all challenging myself to write something that was less than a thousand words, and so I had to get to the point rather quickly, which is tough for someone as verbose as I am. I changed what Barbara Goodson's female character did in the middle of the story, as that was way too crass and I regret doing that; I made it something milder now relatively. I abhor intergender violence because it sets so many double standards, and I ended up doing there what I abhor, and I'm trying to get rid of that (other stories of mine like Feed N' Slake are like that also, but I'm moving away from that now). What Julia/Yuria does at the end here is bad also, but again I'm moving away from that now. One thing I kind of enjoyed doing here in the story, in any case, was mimicking the run-on-sentency kind of way they talk in the show, as they just don't have any punctuation at times (yes, as if they were post-apocalyptic Yahtzees from the Escapist or something).

Platters Powered By Prurience: The Revitalizing Rendezvous Of Druuna: Easily yet another candidate for most pretentiously-titled story of mine (or of anyone else's ever)...I'm kind of just trolling with it sort of anyway:) (I mean, think of all the highfalutin novels with completely unpretentious titles like "The Safety of Objects"...my fucking ass; if I ever become a recognized writer, I will pen a novel entitled "The Insecurity of Arugulas" and Jonathan Safron Douchebag Foer will heap endless praise on it). This is yet another one of those "heal the hurt" stories where I have Druuna be comforted a bit by Jock, instead of her ending up all alone, at least at the end of Morbus Gravis and all. I also tried to bring a more positive outcome out here for Gala, that minor character who really had a bad end in the graphic novel...just noticed too that I used a "he" pronoun for Gala instead of a "she," and I am having a bit of trouble finding the Word file through which I uploaded this story as of now (it expired off of Document Manager on here and all)...let the record show here that Gala is a "she" and not a "he," and that the misgendering was not some Caitlin Jenner identity transitional thing, but rather a typographical error.

Polarized Patricide: The X-Cruciating X-Ecution of Magneto: Though there were a lot of good things about Jim Lee's art and Chris Claremont's storytelling in Uncanny X-Men, what I didn't like about it at times (which also went for other artists, such as Marc Silvestri, as well) was that there could be a lot of tasteless, excessive, glamorized violence in it. This is all subjective, as to taste versus distaste...but it always bothered me that Magneto, who was a semi-hero since the Mid-Eighties, just thoughtlessly slaughtered Yuri Semyanov and Zaladane in UXM 275. If he's that powerful, he didn't have to kill them--and he didn't have to sink the submarine Semyanov mentioned from the past in Russia either. I don't know; the glamorously tasteless slaughter of those two, it didn't scar me or anything...it always just...bothered me. So I wrote this in turn.

Pudgy Parental Psychotropic Nemesis: Operation Overprotective: I'm looking to add at least one scene in this story, perhaps something between the clock tower and the factory parts. I just figured with this story, it's interesting that while in RE1 you have the heroes talking/going into action with fellow heroes, and then in RE2 you have two strangers having an unlikely meeting and then they go into action together...in RE3, interestingly the first person Jill meets is, in contrast to the prologues of the two games preceding, a total coward who does not want to take part in anything. But what if that person Jill encountered first...was the one she ended up encountering the most? In other words...what if Jill's encounter with Dario (the coward's name) in that place was just a prologue to all the subsequent encounters she would have with him as Nemesis (in this alternate reality)? I think this story does well if you enjoyed RE3 and like exploring sort-of alternate possibilities (at least in terms of a given character's identity).

Putrid Poolside Permutations: Viscous Variations Oozing Upon The Raft: One of the Creepshow vignettes that stuck out in my mind was The Raft, from the campy yet chilling visual presentation in it all to Rick Wakeman's somewhat minimalist yet creepily effective score in it. This story, in a few chapters, considers some alternate outcomes or perspectives here; the first chapter is really based more off the short story version in Skeleton Crew (as Randy is still on the raft at the start)...the second chapter could either be from the short story or the film vignette...the third chapter is really from the film, given the oil thing's reactions to some actions that specifically take place only in that version.

Queue the Cosmetic Constancy: Faithfulness to Form: I will confess that first of all, I am a bit OCD; yes, like Sue Grafton, I am seeking to, in time, have a fan story for every letter of the alphabet. This is my "Q" and it concerns the original, European Psylocke. I always treasure the 1987/1988/1989 X-Men years, wherein, as with the rest of Marvel, things were snazzy in the presentation (meaning plot and just the product aesthetically) but not garish as it was in the 1990s and for some time thereafter. I always hated the idea that Psylocke necessarily had to go through some chrysalis transformation in order for her character to thrive, and frankly, not to be annoying or anything, but I miss the hell out of the original Euro Psy, whose character did not try too hard to be in your face and all, and was sort of "there" and nothing more, but it was cool in light of the fact that other characters like Wolverine, Storm, and Rogue were constantly up one's rear end when reading. It was nice to have those "background" characters who were more low key relatively. Now, of course I have my own appreciation for Kwannon and all (see "Penultimate Polka")--honestly, both physically (admittedly) AND otherwise...but I've always had a soft spot, sentimentally, for Euro Psy. So there.

Quinacridone Queens and the Tyrannosaurus Regina: I think this was the most successful of my X-Sequels; as you should still be able to see below, under the "Deleted Stories" part of this profile, I also did sequels to Honeymars, Emmatration, and Nuke-Nudes, but they were all terrible. This one, as a sequel to Queue above, was actually alright in my book--a fun, funny (IMO at least) story that celebrates a hypothetical friendship between Betsy and Kwannon, and which does not get too raunchy with Kwannon as I confess I have done with other stories (I dig her in that way, okay? Any red-blooded hetero guy basically does). I just really enjoyed writing this one, and I hope you enjoy reading it.

R Ravishing Exultation: Adhesives, Autopilots, Amorousness: As with a number of other fictional characters, I have a tiny bit of a thing for a game girl in particular--Gina Cavalli from R Racing Evolution, to be exact, as slight as her presence might be in the Namcoverse (she does technically appear in Ridge Racer DS, though I believe as nothing more than a cover girl). This was just an idea I had, along with a number of my other "adult" stories, in which there might be a fast-paced love affair between Gina and another character, as bizarre as this one might come off. I enjoyed pointing out the whole Spain versus Italy thing with her outfit as well, as in the game it was kind of goofy really.

Settlements of Maddy Sue(s): As I kind of stated above, Madelyne Pryor is my favorite female X-Character. Here I took care of the question of What would happen if she survived Inferno, and I really went out of my way to make her empowered as much as possible while keeping her fun and likeable (as opposed to, say, ANY effing heroine of today in comic books or otherwise, who is miserable and hateful IMO (see Teen Jean, Hope Summers, etc)). This is one of my personal favorites, and I hope that people can read and appreciate this character a bit more--and especially see her as more than either the evil spirit that Fraction made her out to be around UXM510, and/or the Austin Powers Fembot Times Six that she was made out to be in AVX and such.

Sewage Assuaged: The Distillation of Sludge: I've said this above (in my Calliope story description) as well as below now (my Chuck Norris story here): I'm not crazy about characters losing their humanity. As such, this story provides a nice, pleasant soft landing for Sludge, whose story trajectory kind of ended abruptly anyway with the folding of Malibu comics. Here he gets the girl and his body back, which I personally really enjoy for characters who get the short end of the stick on such fronts, whether in comic books or in other media.

Somnambulance for the Sake of Sovereignty: I know; this is probably the most pretentious title I've ever come up with...honestly this is one of my favorite stories, though. I see this one as a sort of John Keats "Ode on a Grecian Urn" sort of preserving-in-amber of the Outback X-Men and the Original Five X-Factor (with Ship and everything), as I remember them in the Late Eighties. I know I harp on the Eighties a lot with the X-Franchise; I admit that I might even come off as trolling about it sometimes, but I just miss, honestly, how everything was just so much simpler then, and not so convoluted and oversaturated as it's been since about 1992 or so... when that damn cartoon came out and turned everything upside-down through its popularity.

Suppositorture: The Never-Ceasing Negation of Negan: As people who have read the comic book series know...and as people watching the TV series will soon learn, at least to an extent...Negan is a real effing prick. He took a lot of loved ones out of the lives of the survivors...and incidentally each of the ones getting one (or more) over on him in this story, with the exception of Carl really, have lost someone special to him or her. This, like so many of my other stories, is a violent kind of primal release against someone ever so harmful like that.

Suzuki's Silent Soliloquy: Throughout Resident Evil Outbreak (Files One and Two) I could never really "get" Yoko. Maybe it was because she apparently wasn't some kind of A-Lister knockoff, unlike Kevin "Tom Cruise" Ryman or Mark "Ving Rhames" Wilkins; I don't know. She always just seemed so...sinister to me. That's why I followed through here--even though I believe she's officially a good guy in the games, with nothing too sketchy behind her--and did this one. People seem to like it in general, and I'm cool with it as well.

The Borealis and the Baby Boom: Again, this is one of my personal favorites because, as I've said numerous times now, I adore Madelyne Pryor for the most part (though I will time and again say that I do not approve of all she did as the Goblin Queen). I always had that question in the back of my mind as to the What If here regarding Scott Summers's staying with her, and I always naively thought as a kid that there actually would be an official Marvel What If issue on that. Given that I believe there never was one, I'm supplying it here myself. To me, this is a sweet story; however, Settlements is even sweeter IMO (because Madelyne forgives Scott there, whereas in Borealis here he just stays with her in the first place...forgiveness/making up always is sweeter in my estimation--although I'm not cool with Maddy being hurt at all)...and my Amends story is the sweetest because not only is there forgiveness, but they get back together in Heaven. I'm such a Pollyanna, I know.

The Cathartic Honeymars of The Cyclops and The Phoenix: This I feel is one of the most major Hits of the stuff I have on here. It's just that if you read New X-Men 142 (geeking out here with the Ish Number, but I'm just trying to help here), you can see things are in a terrible state: Scott is drinking his ass off instead of trying to work anything out with Jean, Logan is taking advantage of Scott's vulnerability...it's awful. If you're a fan of S and J, you just want someone (Jean, Xavier, ANYONE) to burst in and be like...well...as I said in the story, "Get the hell out of here, Logan," and have Scott and Jean patch things up...well, this story scratches that itch. For the record, Scott and Jean are my second place OTP next to Scott and Madelyne (it's like someone who can't decide between Bella/Edward and Bella/Jacob (I'm not a Twilight fan...just sayin':)) and OTPs both possibilities). As bad as this sounds, if I could write for Marvel, I would have Scott clone himself and the original Scott would retire off with Jean in New York, while the clone Scott would retire off with the clone Jean (ie Madelyne) in Alaska, and everyone would be happy. (Or maybe, in the spirits of my Amends story above, the original Scott would go off with Madelyne, and Jean would get the clone Scott, given that Scott and Madelyne are my first-place OTP, and Scott and Jean are my second-place OTP...I haven't decided:)) I know, it's all unethical--but it solves my Twilighty dilemma at least:) Also, such a happenstance would singlehandedly close Marvel down. Maybe that would be the best for those Earth-666ers anyway (supposedly 616 is another Number of the Beast, actually).

The Company of Effing Chuck Norris: Generally speaking, in addition to certain kinds of violence (i.e. fire violence and the neck violence of vampire stories) I hate stories wherein people lose their humanity. Even though I know the Wolf in Carter's tale here had killed people and such, I still hated that he had to lose his humanity for good here, so I turned the story on its head. Wanted to do it tongue in cheek, though, so things did not come off as too malicious and everything.

The Crisis of Chris 'Roidfield: For the record, I am not the first person to have called him "Roidfield"...if you do a Google search on the name, a ton of people have called him this. I nonetheless join the rest of the multiverse in dubbing him as such, and I'm in fact making fun of his ludicrous physique in this game. In keeping with my obnoxious nostalgianess as demonstrated elsewhere in my stories...where is the lanky-ass Chris of yesteryear...)

The Prune Proprietary: This is another one of my "felt bad for this character" stories, in which here I felt bad for Comics Carol, who despaired so much that (SPOILERS FOR COMICS) she offed herself via zombie. Because I'm a fan of the TV show Bob Stookey also, I paired them off here. I also dig Alice Warren from the comics, so I gave her a minor role here as well.

Trailer Family Tribulations: As with RE5 above, I played through all of Dead Island 1 (as Logan, ironically...I say ironically because that's Wolverine's "real" (sort of) name (not really), and I officially hate that clawed effer...and I chose Mister Carter for this game...!) Anyway, I played through DI1 and I liked it pretty much, although everyone had to have a beef about it here and there...I agree with the multiverse that the trailer is better than the game on the whole. There are a good number of subtle references to things in the game, as well as in the trailer, in this story; see if you can AshKetchumically catch' em all!

Urban Pron: Yellow Fever in Green Harbor: I've played through the PS2 game Urban Reign a few times. A couple of years ago it occurred to me, as I may recall watching an enemy in the game power-bombing Shun Ying a couple times against a wall--this could make a great physical, "adult situations" story. A few battles later, with my imagining the sultry Shun executing some of her moves (such as the run-ups and such) in starkers, to fit the tone, and wham...I conceived of this little vignette. And then I thought, who better to play the main parts than the two leads--with one of them (SPOILERS SORT OF) kind of scorning the other at the end of the story mode, it was so much the better for this concept (END SPOILERS). I was fence-sitting for the longest of whiles over whether to actually write it, and then I decided that the hell. So here.

Vengeance among the Greene(s) and Grime(s): Lilly Caul's Comeuppance: As I say in the Afterword to this story, I am all for female character empowerment--as long as there is accountability accompanying that empowerment. Because Lilly (from knowing her for like two seconds in the comics, as well as knowing her apparent forever-tenure now in the novels) is apparently exempted from the whole karmic/cosmic justice thing--which I noted Gareth talking about to Bob, just now, upon rewatching the end of the "Strangers" episode (today is 10/26/14 as I write this)...because Lilly is apparently exempt from it under the story canon, I decided to eliminate that little exemption by way of this story. It's not by any means to defend the Governor or to avenge Lori or her baby...it's just to keep that karmic/cosmic wheel turnin' here.

Villain Into Valentine: Virgil's Torrid Transformation: I wrote this story kind of for the same reason as I wrote the Bayonetta story above: Railing against double standards in intergender violence. I do NOT condone excessive violence against women per se, and I understand that scenes like the Virgil/Alabama one here are a kind of release for those in society who try to combat violence against women. That said, doing the "second wrong" of excessive violence against men, as in this story where IMO it went way too far (and to be fair, I feel the violence in this film, in this scene, went too far on both sides, from him to her and vice versa), this "second wrong" does not make a right, and I wrote this to deal with how upset I felt at watching the basically X-Rated level of violence in the scene. NOW, I fully acknowledge that I've written insane violence stories as well, so there is even hypocrisy in my preaching against this here; I am trying in the new year (2016) and beyond to move past it, and I specifically wrote this story here to deal with how bothered I was by the scene. As I said above about the Judith Bible story, if you flipped the genders on the characters here, and played it out as it is in the film, that kind of violence against Alabama would be abominable--yet it's okay if it's her doing it to him. As with the Judith story above, here I am providing a more peaceful alternative generally.

What Really Kept Isaac Going While On The Ishimura: This is a Dead Space story, obviously; I know I was a bit hard on Nicole and Kendra, but (SPOILER WARNINGS) the former, honestly, was a tease (or at least was presented to be a tease, even if it was the Marker's doing as to her ghost's appearing), and the latter was a conniver no matter how you sliced it. The last line of the story is a Faerie Queene reference (English Literature from centuries ago by Edmund Spenser), by the way.

Xenodochus Most Discomfited: The Wayward Wasting Of Count Nosferatu: I will first readily admit that this extremely unwieldy title is just more of my effort to get a story in beginning with a unique letter of the alphabet, to get me ultimately to all twenty-six letters. A xenodochus is a person who runs a monastery and stuff, by the way. It's kind of interesting that I would make a Non-X-Men story my X Story (considering how many X-Men things I have done in the past and all here); anyway, this is a mashup between the Hunter: The Reckoning games (especially Wayward for PS2 and Redeemer for Original Xbox) as well as a relatively obscure yet really great PC game called Nosferatu: The Wrath of Malachi. Nosferatu and Hunter are both checking out and I recommend both of them here. Because Nosferatu ended on such a down note there, I decided to make things brighter, as I do in many of my stories; so here, then.

Yachtsy Wrecks and Nazi Drecks: The Retribution of Gateway: This title is a tiny bit misleading, as Gateway really only plays a kind of bit part here (albeit a critical one); the real star here is Cylla Markham, that hapless pilot in UXM260. The villains are the decadent Von Struckers, those crapolas. Andreas is a snooty asswhip, and Andrea is a detestable delectable...lithe blonde, who looks pretty damn magnificent on that yacht, and the image of it always stayed with me, so much more than any Emmanent Frosty representation of a golden-maned White Queen, and Andrea was always criminally underused (criminally in more ways than one), and Andrea might be the main antagonist in a certain sequel to a nude-themed story I may be doing later this year (even though she already cameoed at the end of the first installment), and there's this Nick Fury film in the late Nineties that has the lady who played Sonya in the second awful Mortal Kombat film as Andrea and it has David Hasselhoff as Fury and WHAT MORE COULD YOU ASK FOR and...(pant, pant, pant)...Yeah, but anyway...Eff those Nazis.

Zaftig Zones And Warped Wantonness: From past decades and such, I have always been intrigued by Dr. Chaos, and I finally bought a copy complete in the box a couple of months ago. I hope to get into it soon, and in the meantime I have watched a couple of playthroughs of it. I like how quirky and underrated it is and such. On the other side of this, no joke but Ramaya has always been my favorite game girl of all time. As is evident in a number of my other stories (especially Nuke-Nudes Forever: The Penultimate Polka), I have a belly/navel fetish, and Ramaya, if you check out Arabian Fight, is like the poster video game girl for that itch to scratch. (She has nice thighs, too, especially when doing a standing jump kick straight up into the air and not jumping forward...but enough already as I already sound sketch enough as it is). Actually, let me say a bit more about my fixation: I just dig the erogenous midriff on women and all. I'd love to take a trip to Belize, just to be able to get on the plane and say the country's name really slowly. Whenever I hear the surname of the New England Patriots Head Coach, I get slightly aroused. (I'm all hetero and stuff by orientation, not that there's anything wrong with any other orientation etc etc etc). Anyways.

Look, with all these small sound bites here, I'm just trying to give a reader's guide here generally, because I know I've posted a lot on my account here, and if you happened to like a certain story, I'm trying to guide you to some other good stuff here too.

SO here's the deal with the deleted stuff and all. It was all terrible; I know. See, I stated on my profile here before that I was going to keep it up anyway, because I didn't want to hide anything; WELL, the way I see it here is, 1) I'm still mentioning/even keeping the profile summaries (see below) for them up here...so really I'm not still hiding the fact that they existed, anyway; and 2) if you REALLY want to check them out, you can PM me and I'll find a way to email the story to you or do something in some way to make it accessible. Hell, I'll even repost the story on this site if I get enough PMs/prompts to do so. My rationalization for taking the following five stories down was that I just felt (especially with the ones with multiple chapters, in which I could SEE that people didn't get past like the first chapter and all) that I was just wasting people's time if they read to a certain (early) point and then hated a given story. So I took all the following train wrecks out. Again, though, if you really want to check these out again, PM me and I'll repost one/all of the following. You can also feel free to PM me just to call me a punkass for removing them in the first place. In any case, here are the five, below, which I removed; I changed wording to past tense on these to indicate that these stories are no longer here.

Brumal Memoirs to Brutal Abbatoirs: This is based in the universe of the first Sierra PC Phantasmagoria game; not too long ago, I watched a "Ways to Die in Phantasmagoria" clip on Youtube, and there the female lead Adrienne has all these permutations in which she keeps trying to get her possessed husband to recall a snowman trinket he once gave her--she does this in an effort to snap him out of his mania. If you watch all the deaths on that clip, you get "Remember the snowman? Remember the snowman?" emblazoned onto your brain. I combined said emblazoning with the catatonic-survivor two-second ending to this game and came up with this story.

Car'face; or Carlito's Way Zero: This is somewhere in between Hit or Miss; it's a Middle or Maybe. It really depends; if you love the idea of a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup involving Dead Rising 1 and the film Scarface, then it's right up your alley. As of December 2013 I changed all the "eff"s to actual F-Bombs, so now it's a bit more "grown up" in a manner of speaking (as grown-up as cussing per se supposedly is, anyway).

Emmapause to Extirpation: I've decided to start doing a sequel or two to some stories that I think have done kind of well (and even for a story or two that has not had too many reads); this is one of them, and given that I like the bond that Emma and Christian had in Em's limited series, I decided to celebrate it a bit more through this adventure, one year later from the Emmatration one (see below). It follows the same vein of torment (not going too far, though), mixed with popular music and lots of sarcasm etc otherwise. Again, I hope to do sequels to some other stories, especially within the coming few months.

End of Hopes: Shi'ar Happens: I hate Hope Summers. I hate her. She just sucks. That's all you need to know for the reason for this story's existence. I will also say that this story exists because it's supposed to be a manifestation of poetic justice of sorts, at least metaphorically: in a number of stories, IMO, Hope dumps on people and completely gets away with it,because she is who she is...well, here, she's on the receiving end of it for once. Gabe is kind of an innocent victim here, because I wanted to balance out what happens between the genders; it's just an unfortunate happenstance for him, I suppose, here.

Fracking with the Bendy Boundaries: I hate Brian Bendis. I hate him. He just sucks. That's all you need to know for the reason for this story's existence. I know that what I've written here with Teen Jean is not too flattering, in the first half of the story anyway; I'm just arguing that in attempting to empower her character, Bendis has made her "too far gone" in terms of how overbearing and even bullying she can be. This story also parodies how disgustingly inflated (Teen) Jean has become as a character; as much as I second-place OTP Scott and Jean, I cannot stand Jean being placed on a goddess pedestal, and things get worse year after year (I almost literally threw up when I first heard the concept of the "Jean Grey School"...I don't think that she, Scott, or anyone should replace the name of the person who founded the school, and I would feel that way if the founder were male or female). I honestly believe that the demand that Teen Jean cure all the world's diseases while wrestling crocodiles or Komodo Dragons simultaneously is all in a day's work for a Mary Sue like this. (Now, I know I made Madelyne a Mary Sue of sorts in my "Settlements" story below...but IMO she deserved it much more than Jean because IMO Jean has mostly been treated pretty well (when she's not being killed off, anyway), while Madelyne was narratively gangbanged in the Eighties by Scott's leaving her, demons taking advantage of her (Inferno), and Sinister wanting to take her apart and study her). As far as I'm concerned, too, in the present, neither Teen Jean's youth nor the fact that she knows her future excuses the way she treats certain people (or almost anyone) in ANXM. Bendis is also a d-bag IMO in his constant imbalance of power between genders, and here through this story I argue implicitly for more of balance between the genders.

Illin' with the Upstaged Underground: This was definitely one of my weirdest ones. I did this one 1) to kind of make fun of the Mutant X series and 2) to make a point about how I don't like graphic violence in comics for the most part (or really in any medium) (although you could argue that My "Shi'ar Happens" story is kind of violent/extreme...I may write something on here later to try and defend that, when I have the time). Anyway, this story had a sort-of-Darkchilde in it (the Marvel one, not the Maximum/Image one) and it was pretty fun if you didn't take it too seriously (like a good number of my stories).

Lost Playin' It: I think that the lyrical parts of this (which spoof on Suzanne Vega) were okay; the in-between prose parts were awful whining, though--which I included only because I thought that in order to have a story on here, you had to have portions of your entry involve paragraphed prose. I don't know.

Nuke-Nudes Forever Part The Second: A Colander Of Chromosomal Culling: This story continues the whole Scott and Kwannon romance angle, as torrid and somewhat raunchy as it may be. This story is also kind of a sequel to Chasms and Chiasmus (with Warren and Jean), as well as my Base Conjury story described above (with Genosha and Krakoa). Also the physically perfect (but awful Nazi) specimens of Andreas and Andrea Strucker appear here, as they have in a couple other stories of mine (including Nuke-Nudes One (Polka) above).

I was honestly thinking about doing a third Nuke Nudes as well, which would have been subtitled "Xty Shades of Grape" as inspired, of course, by the Fifty Shades Trilogy. (I've only read "Freed" so far, as my Target didn't have "Grey" so I decided to read them backwards and all). I think, though, that such writing leans toward what many readers don't really like in my repertoire and all; you know, that side of my stuff that's like:

"HURR BENDIS IS A POETASTER PIETASTER YOONUCK; BUT OOO ITS KWANIN IN TEH BIKEENY AND THEN DIS AWFUR...ERRRRR NO WAIT SIKEKLOPZ IS KISSIN HER BELLEH" so I decided against a third Nuke Nudes. (I may even delete the second one sometime soon as it kind of sucks and all; we'll see.)

To be fair, Fifty Shades Freed IMO isn't much better. Here's Freed; ready?

(SPOILERS FOR FIFTY SHADES FREED):

"HOLY CRAP! HOLY FUCK! HOLY SHIT! HOLY FUCK! MAH FIDDEH!* MAH FIDDEH! NAUGHTEH FIDDEH! I'M INDA BIKEENY IT COSTED 569 DOLLAHS! I SHOTTED JACK HIDE, INDA LEGGG! FIDDEH BABEHS! MAH FIDDEH!"

(*Translation: My Fifty!)

100 MILLION COPIES SOLD

I mean, WHY?! Why does THAT sell all those copies, and my Nuke Nudes are only read by like ten people?! Oh, the inhumanity of it all...

Passion on a 'Plate: Usually my stories are overlong to the point of becoming beyond interminable; I just decided this time to do a quick take real fast that explores, in a sort of vorelike fashion, what would happen if Emplate and Famine sort of got together. I was originally going to post this one Easter Weekend (just a week ago from the time of this story's posting/profile update), and have some dumb pun that was like "He eats her on Easter" and all...then I decided nah. (The dumb pun's right here on this profile, anyway...but who the hell reads this?!)

Revanches and Reversions (but No Revisions): This is also another good story if you like Betsy and/or Kwannon...once again the European and Asian purple Psylocke people in X-Men. I have a story in which these strong heroines revert back to their original bodies--with original minds in original bodies, that is. I plan to revise (apropos with the title) this story a bit in the near future to have less talking and moar fighting; I promise. As of right now, it's a bit weighed down with dialogue, and the fight scenes as they are, are a bit lame--but I will fix this soon.

Scott and Jean Versus the Killer Quesadilla: Hoo boy. This was the big, big Miss (at least of my X-Stories; see also "Street Fighter" below). I believe this story had some value, insofar as my arguments against Quesada and such, I believe, hold some weight. However, I am fully aware that it was douchy of me to put myself in the story. I did so because I wanted to put myself 110% behind what I was trying to express here; it just came out as kind of whiny and obnoxious. Still, I think that the story nonetheless had some value, insofar as my digs against Marvel, I believe, were reasonable to an extent here.

Sobbing Havok's Last Limbo: From really old UXM issues I believe (such as the first story arcs for Havok, around the late UXM50s or early UXM60s or so), I think I recall his character having this dumb catch phrase like "CRY HAVOK!!!" It was goofy-ass and such, and I'm kind of mocking that here, in the midst of the dreary yet sexy ordeal that was Inferno. As always, too, I prop up my beloved beautiful Madelyne Pryor in this story as the co-lead here. The end to this story (the climax, that is...before the couple of potential endings, actually)...the climax arrives a bit abruptly here--I might end up adding a bit more meat to the end here because of that, perhaps in the coming few weeks and such.

Street Fighter YZ Tekken 201X: Fights After the Final Fight: Why? Why, you ask? This, like "Quesadilla" above, was a huge effing Miss for me. The reason I did this one was that SF2010TFF was and I suppose still is my favorite NES game of all time. I played it to death back in the day (and yes, I did beat it several times back then); I figured that I would just do an homage of sorts through using all the SF characters--and given that I have played a number of Tekkens in my time, and I was like on T6 when I was writing this, I figured what the hell. This all does not remove the fact that this was pretty much the collision of the Amtrak All-Stars with the Conrail Intercontinental Team of train wrecks of stories. I said while this was up on the site that I would send you a prize in the mail, in fact, if you managed to get through all five chapters (not really).

The Scintillating Six'em of The Cyclops and The Phoenix: I think people like HoneyMars more than most of my stuff (at least my X-Stuff), so I finally came around to doing a sequel here. It doesn't have quite the impact of HoneyMars, as here Scott and Jean are pretty simpatico (whereas in the previous story they had it out pretty thoroughly, so there was more tension there). It's still pretty good IMO, and it may be the prelude for a separate story, soon, in which (SPOILER) Scott actually DOES go on trial, as the story hints, and the three daughters initiated here may have a small tiff with a certain Three-in-One...or is it Four-in-One, or Five-in-One...? We'll see...

The Squawking Reds: Yes, I can often be a troll. To be fair, I have been (and really I guess still am) crushing obsessively on certain characters for a long, long time, such as the Psylockes, Madelyne Pryor, and Jean Grey. This story did NOT aim at other Jean Grey fans (if there's any fan implicated, to be honest, it's me, myself, and I alone); this story really, primarily aimed at the insanity of the X-Characters themselves in going all rage-infected over Jean. As I state in the Preamble, sort of, to the first chapter here, one could see UXM215 for Logan's insanity, UXM239 for Ororo's insanity, and X-Factor 1 (first series) for Scott and Warren going nuts--like, scary creepy nuts--over her. I don't privately go scary creepy nuts over her myself, but as I manifested with "Quiddle Heartsick" at the end of the second chapter here, I have a bit of a mania for her; this story kind of reflected my self-conscious ambivalence about my crush, especially in light of the above insanities (UXM 215 etc) and in light of the fact that the whole franchise obsesses like nuts over her, with everything from The Jean Grey School to The Trial of Jean Grey etc etc etc. I mean, they do it with Logan, too, I know...it's just a creepy-ass thing and if this franchise were really about a team(s), it wouldn't be so fixated on one or two characters like that. There is no "I" in "Team," and there is no "J" either, people!

Utter Lows: The Treatments of Marty Rantzen: When I was a kid I saw the trailer for Slaughter High, and I thought it more freakish than scary; it always stayed in the back of my mind in any case. I just saw the film now, in my mid-thirties, for the first time. A couple of the young ladies who bought it (as in, were killed) were done so in a way that, again, stays with me now...this story, as with many of my other stories, makes for turnabout, on their behalf specifically. There was a nice way of doing this turnabout, and a not so nice way; the latter is the first version/chapter and the former is the second version/chapter. I will pronounce as well that I was/am smitten with Josephine Scandi (who plays Shirley, the girl in the bathtub...and NOT because of how she...er...looks in the tub, before the acid anyway)--I wish she were in more films over the years. Ah, well.

Xanthic Slash And Worthy White Trash: How Gomi Fled The Spread: This was definitely one of my most obscure ones; it was based on a very limited series in the 1980s called Fallen Angels, and was dedicated to Jo Duffy, a very underrated female author from that decade. I would recommend that people read Fallen Angels just because of how quirky it was, although it's admittedly not the best written story ever (still chock full of bizarre mutant characters to make it worth a read). And Duffy was before her time in terms of the tone she gave her writing; just read the carnage that occurs in What If Phoenix Had Not Died, from the early 1980s original run of What If, and you will see what I mean, as it was very out there for the era as it was.

LIST OF OTHER CHARACTERS WHOM I HAVE FELT BAD FOR AND FOR WHOM I WOULD WRITE A STORY BUT FOR THE FACT THAT AS OF JANUARY 2016 I AM MOSTLY GETTING OUT OF WRITING FAN FICTION AND ALL

The Security Guard on the conveyor belt at the end of Child's Play 2

The Sewer Utility Worker at the end of Friday the 13th Part 8

That guy who was a body shield in the original Total Recall film

Any of the people taken down by ED-209 in the earlier Robocop films and all

Anyone whose body has gone completely or partially on fire in any film

Paul Koplin from Season Two of 24 (And Sara Wynter just had her friggin' ear pierced in that same sequence...)

...The list goes on and on; anyone else I have forgotten for now, they are in my intentions here as well.