Broken emotions

I own nothing

The HQ of the Survey Corp, the grand castle looked lifeless. It stood on the grassy landscape, looking as if death itself brushed its filthy hands throughout its walls spreading a cloud of blackness. The halls were dark and the rooms were empty. The commons were life was once full, now lingered with darkness and silence.

Levi sat with a cup in his hand alone at the end of the long table, a place where his squad once sat cracking jokes and teasing one another. He stared down at his cup filled coffee and saw his reflection. He was pale, paler then usually, his eyes looked weary and the black shadows under his eyes excavated in color. Levi brought the cup to his lips and slowly drank the coffee. It was cold, yet it was sweet and light, a delicious brew. He set the cup down and caught the small smile he unknowingly formed on his lips.

He looked up, and saw nothing but empty chairs and an empty table. The feeling of hollowness filled him to the brim. Levi swiftly averted his gaze back to his cup. To his surprise he noticed a clear liquid that took form on his eyes.

"I am…crying?" he muttered to himself.

Levi brought a hand up to his face, swiping the liquid that threatened to form tears. Your weak. A voice echoed in his head. Pathetic. You couldn't protect them. You couldn't protect her. Levi plugged his ears and buried his face on the wooden table.

"Stop it," he whispered furiously.

Weak

"No…shut up..." Levi muttered plugging his ears tighter.

You should have never let them alone.

Your decision killed them. It killed her.

"NO! Shut up!" Levi screamed, he stood from the table filled with raged.

"Shut the fuck up!" he screamed. Levi kicked the chair and pounded his fist on the table. The cup jump from the powerful blow and the coffee spilled. "They were fine! I trusted them to be ok!" He pushed himself from the table and gripped his raven colored hair. He needed to release his emotions, this anger that filled him so suddenly, the sadness he abided, tearing his heart until it was nothing. Nothing, but a mere muscle pumping his blood for survive.

Levi felt his eyes water and before he could swipe them away, a tear rolled down his cheek and spattered on the cobbled stone floor.

"No, don't cry you…" he growled punching the nearest object to him: the wall.

"Don't cry you stupid idiot!"

Levi punched the wall once more.

"You piece of shit!"

"You moron!"

Another punch was thrown, harder then before. Levi continued to punch the wall brushing aside the pain it caused. He didn't care about the reddening of his knuckles or his bones threatening to crack. He continued to punch, with more power then last. Levi reeled back his right arm, tightened his right fist, and cocked his hip for more force.

"You failure!"

Levi punched the wall with all his force. Instantly a searing pain flashed through his knuckles, swiftly spreading through his hand, wrist and arm.

"Ugh!" Levi screamed.

He stumbled back and clasped his right arm across his chest. He looked down at it and saw his knuckles flowed with blood. He tried to move his wrist, but a sting pain stopped him from moving it any further.

Levi slumped down on the foot of the table. He leaned back, and gasped for air.

"Calm down," he muttered through his heavy breath. Levi closed his eyes. The pain slowly faded, and Levi could feel his arm turn numb. He let his injured arm drop to his side. He clasped his chest, and took a shaky breath. The memory of his squad, flashed through his him, like lightning.

Gunther hung upside down from one of the gigantic trees, his body dangled lifeless like a rag doll. Eld and Oluo's bodies soaked in blood lay on the forest floor, looking straight up to heaven, to the eyes of god. Worst, of all was she. Petra Ral slumped awkwardly forward on that tree. Her own blood smeared on her face. The once happy and cheerful ball of light was gone. In a matter of seconds, so fast that she herself couldn't even scream.

"Why'd you leave?" he uttered faintly.

Suddenly a cool light breeze brushed against Levi, he couldn't help but relax to the touch. For a minute Levi soaked in this peaceful moment. Then he realized the stone floors had soften into something damp and spikey. He ran his uninjured hand through it, feeling something dewy and luscious similar to new carpet.

"Grass?" he asked in confusion.

Wasn't I in the com-

A giggle interrupted Levi's thoughts. His eyes snapped open, realizing that he was no longer alone and that someone was leaning against him.

"Captain," a gentle almost melodic voice called out.

Levi's eyes widen, he felt his heart fasten in pace.

That voice…no it cant be…

Levi leaned back on the person who sat behind him and another giggle came.

"Your heavy for being short Captain,"

He felt his eyes water once more; he but made no attempt to stop himself. Soon tears flowed down his cheeks. He took a raspy breath and spoke

"You know I don't like being called short…"

Levi stopped and took another raspy breath. He felt his heartache, and the tears that rarely came flowed even more.

"…Petra"

Levi felt Petra's body slumped back on his; her head leaned against the back of his shoulder.

"I know," she giggled.

It was silent for split moment. Levi was unable to compose himself, his emotions were uncontrollable, and his tears, unlike him but at that moment it was all he could do.

"Petra…" Levi called lowly.

"May I turn around?"

No answer came, but Levi felt a hand placed gently on his shoulder and the Captain turned. He couldn't help but chuckle lowly. There in front of him was Petra. Her cameral colored hair blew with the breeze and her pale skin glistened. Her lips held a small yet beautiful smile. Her eyes, her light brown eyes were filled with life, flied with happiness unlike that day.

Levi without hesitation wrapped his arms around her body and pulled her in a tight hug. He felt her warmth against his numb body, something he hasn't sensed in a while. Petra was surprised by the captain's sudden embrace. She felt his cold body tremble slightly as she slowly wrapped her arms around him.

"You're here," he whispered. "I've missed you Petra, more then you fucking know."

Petra smiled and kissed the Captain's head. She let go of her embrace and slowly pushed Levi back, so his eyes met hers.

"I came because the guys wanted me to give you a pep talk." She said in a playful tone. "I'm probably the worst person to do this, but I'll try to-"

In a swift motion Levi pressed his lips to Petra's cutting off her "pep" talk. She herself was surprised but did not part; she closed her eyes and absorbed the Captain's sweet sensation. Levi wrapped his arms around Petra's waist pulling her closer to him. He nibbled her soft lips, and inserted his tongue to deepen the kiss. A few minutes later, Levi parted from her, his breath heavy like before and his face flushed red. Petra too was breathless, her face equally as flushed as Levi's.

"I don't need a pep talk," Levi muttered in between breaths.

"I need my squad…my team. It was my fault…"

Petra let out a deep breath; she brought her hands up and cupped Levi's face, holding it like a newborn baby.

"Shut up," she whispered

"You made a choice and you trusted us. We don't blame you Captain; we respect you because you let us stand on our own."

"Yeah and thanks to me everyone is dead," Levi began. He felt his eyes water, he looked down and adverted his eyes from hers.

Petra tenderly turned Levi's head so he was force to look at her. She wiped the tears that threatened to fall with the end of her thumb.

"Death can't separate anything," Petra assured.

"Death isn't the end, death is the being of a new life elsewhere…"

Petra placed her hand on Levi's chest where his heart now beat steadily.

"We're right here…and one day you will see us again in person. But until that day, please my Captain…"

Petra's form began to fade and Levi knew he only had seconds with her.

"My Levi until then, stay strong." Petra finished with a bright smile.

Levi sniffed and nodded. He knew she was right; he had a role in his war torn world. He just like Eren was a symbol of hope and valor. Humanity's strongest had to remain valiant when others fail to prevail. However, there was only so much he could take. He himself was still human, and he needed hope just like everyone else, he needed something no someone to give him strength.

He took her hand kissed it and laced it through his.

"You are my strength," Levi smiled.

Petra's face flushed she swiftly pecked Levi's lips as her body faded in a trail sterling lights.

"Until that day, My Petra" Levi managed before Petra's brightly lit face faded and once more Levi was alone.

Levi closed his eyes and the cool breeze he felt disappeared, and the ground was no longer soft. Levi opened his eyes; he was back at the commons, sitting as he was before. He stood up slowly, the chair that he kicked was back to its intended spot and his cup was set neatly on the table with a light steam evaporating from it.

Its hot?

Levi walked to the table; he picked up the cup with his right hand and slowly drank from it. He formed a small smile as he set it down. He flexed his right hand open and placed it on his chest.

"Thanks for the coffee Petra…" Levi smiled.

"And for the 'pep' talk"

A/N

Its been over a year maybe more since I've uploaded. I needed to recover from something, but now I'm back! However I still have school so my uploads will be monthly with the exception of spring break. Anyhow I am in love with Attack on Titan(Shingeki no Kyojin)! The anime is just amazing, I love how it touches a lot of human aspects. So I decided to write this fanfic about Levi. No matter how strong a person can get, they too have limits. I wanted to write something that shows Levi's emotional side, his breaking point. I don't know how I did, so please fill free to Review and Criticize my writing I take those as advice to better myself. However, I will look over those who flame, theres no sense in being rude. Anyways, hope you liked it! Don't forget to review:)~Darkis