The crown felt heavy in his hands and he tossed it on his table in disgust. He didn't deserve it. For years, people had been telling him that he would be a better king than his father. More humane, more caring, more just. They had so much faith in him and all he had done was disappoint them. Especially Guinevere. Guinevere who had been nothing but kind, loyal and supportive all these years. Guinevere who he had said he would love forever. Guinevere who he had almost killed.

"It's not your fault. You couldn't have known that the deer was one of your servants." Mithian had tried to provide comfort but she didn't understand, didn't know all he had done.

Merlin had disappeared with Gwen and Gaius the moment they reached the castle. He had told them to use one of the many empty guest rooms but Merlin had ignored him and carried the unconscious Gwen to his small chambers instead. Watching from the door as Merlin lay Gwen gently onto his bed, as Elyan hovered over her and as Gaius rushed about gathering potions and herbs, he realised that he had no place there. In the chamber were people who loved her, people who would never hurt her.

After instructing Leon to stay and keep an eye on them, he took one last look at Gwen before he left.

Gwen was tidying up the council room when Arthur slipped in and kissed her cheek.

"Back already?"

"Were you hoping I would be gone for longer?" Gently, he turned her to him and pulled her into a hug, burying his face in her hair.

"Well -" She giggled as he nuzzled her neck.

"Admit it, you missed me."

"The knights were good company, especially Gwa -" She shrieked when he tickled her waist. "Yes, yes. I missed you."

He grinned and she responded with a grin of her own. "I missed you too."

There were so many things that needed to be done but he felt paralysed. All he wanted to do was to sit with Gwen and wait for her to wake. But that was the one thing he couldn't do. How could he face her ever again?

As it turned out, he couldn't avoid everything. Mithian stood outside his room, her face full of concern. He supposed he might have felt some guilt but at the moment, all his emotions and thoughts revolved around Gwen.

"Are you alright?" Mithian reached for him but he avoided her touch. Confusion crossed her features.

"I am very sorry but perhaps you should return home." It was sudden, cruel even, especially after he'd led her to believe that perhaps they had a future together but he couldn't continue to lead her on. He couldn't pretend he wanted to spend his life with anyone who was not Gwen.

"I know you are upset at almost killing your servant. I understand. Let me be here to support you." She stepped closer to him and he moved away. He didn't deserve comfort. Anyone would be lucky to have someone like Mithian offering support and on some level, he appreciated her concern but now, with what he had done, having Mithian here in the castle was just wrong.

"I can't marry you. I'm sorry. Truly." The words came out with less tact than he wanted but they were honest - possibly the first time he had been truly honest with her.

She tensed and took a step away from him. He braced himself for her anger. There was no doubt he deserved it.

Her voice cool and controlled, she asked, "Just like that, it's over? What about the lands?"

"I'm willing to give you the disputed lands if it will keep the peace between our kingdoms. I have no desire to start a war. It may not be enough of a gesture but it is all I can offer."

An uneasy silence fell between them. Finally, Mithian spoke up. "It's the servant girl, isn't it? She's more than a servant. Much like Merlin is more than a servant."

"She is everything."

Hushed whispers surrounded her and her head was pounding. When she tried to move, pain shot through her. Then some memories returned and she panicked - had Morgana captured her? Struggling, she sat up and looked around. Merlin's room. Tears blurred her vision. Morgana must have taken Camelot. Why else would she be back?

Someone moved and she turned her head slowly to look.

"Gaius." Her voice rasped, due to the lack of use.

"Gwen! How are you feeling?" The old physician made his way to her as fast as he could. "I'm so relieved that you're awake."

Merlin emerged from behind, a smile on his face although his eyes were sombre. "Gwen."

"Merlin! Is everything alright?" Again she struggled to sit up but the pain was unbearable and she couldn't stop her tears from falling.

"Hey, don't. Don't move. You'll burst your stitches!" Merlin rushed to her side. "And everything is fine now that you're awake." He pushed her hair from her face and smiled fondly down at her. The tension in her eased a little.

"Morgana hasn't taken over Camelot?"

"No. She's still out there but for now, everything is fine." His warm hand wrapped around hers. "I missed you."

"Oh Merlin." And she was gathered in a gentle hug as she sobbed into his shoulder.